Should you be hostile or keep communication lines with your ex? Let me find out.

For most relationships, break-ups are inevitable. So it's better to keep it cordial. Who knows where you may meet in future?

Hostile? i dun fink so. if u come across her, flash a tooth, wave an arm, do sumfing. but it depends on d circumstances u broke up tho

Well if your relationship is not going to end in marriage, then one day you must break up. And if one person has more expectations for the relationship than the order, the break-up is going to be painful.

So there's no reason to make a big deal of breakups. This is like a driver expresing surprise and making a big fuss whenever his car runs out of fuel! It's best to keep it cordial. Nasty break-ups are just wrong; try to help your ex-partner to manage his/her emotions in that critical period of rejections. Something that is so inevitable should be managed properly.

i agree with seun. no matter wot!I suggest you lay it down as careful as possible , not just drop it.
The world is to small, to think you would not meet or need them again.
I know, trust me

U Know?!

Yeah i practice what i preach!!

l totally agree with everybody but then it sure depends on why and how we broke up. for instance how about a guy who has been cheating on you with your best friend and at the same time has been a liar , nah i don't think i want to see this person again , much more in communication with him.

Best to keep it cordial although sometimes nasty break-ups are the only way to go.

Be Cool! thats all

It depends on how the relationship was broken.

I believe intially you should give each other the space to think and breathe. Then contact each other to try and reach a friendly medium.

I didn't quite manage to pull that off and that's why I'm here sulking on the romance boards. I think definitely seek for friendship, they were once part of your life, in future you may want to say hello and how can you, when you've lost touch, you've disconnected all their lines, you've given them every insult in the book, or shown them your stalkerish side.

Well, from my own experience, I am trying to be friendly and he is taking his sweet time to reply, despite him being the one to end it.

I will always be there if he wishes to talk, but it's an ego thing. You gotta suck it in, trust me it might seem humbling, because it is! You feel hurt but you must be there for the other person, like I said before, you were part of each other's life. Eventually the other person should come around, if not, just treat them like a distant friend, a hello once in a while, but don't beg or grovel for responses. Just let them be, if your distance friend does not reply, don't try and force it, don't escalate it to trying to call him, or trying all his emails and contacts.

Try and find out the sneakiest way you how he's feeling about the breakup (as in he should never find out).

topup:

I believe intially you should give each other the space to think and breathe. Then contact each other to try and reach a friendly medium.

I didn't quite manage to pull that off and that's why I'm here sulking on the romance boards. I think definitely seek for friendship, they were once part of your life, in future you may want to say hello and how can you, when you've lost touch, you've disconnected all their lines, you've given them every insult in the book, or shown them your stalkerish side.

Well, from my own experience, I am trying to be friendly and he is taking his sweet time to reply, despite him being the one to end it.

I will always be there if he wishes to talk, but it's an ego thing. You gotta suck it in, trust me it might seem humbling, because it is! You feel hurt but you must be there for the other person, like I said before, you were part of each other's life. Eventually the other person should come around, if not, just treat them like a distant friend, a hello once in a while, but don't beg or grovel for responses. Just let them be, if your distance friend does not reply, don't try and force it, don't escalate it to trying to call him, or trying all his emails and contacts.

Try and find out the sneakiest way you how he's feeling about the breakup (as in he should never find out).

Quit lying. you ended it. In fact, after the breakup it's no longer compulsory to reply your emails, talkless of the days it takes.

LMOA, we have to be very specific when ask questions. For instance, this question should not be directed at guys who put a girl on their shitlist for merely saying no when they ask her out. How do we expect those type of guys to be cordial after a break up? A girl will be lucky to get a "Bone" face. . . I imagine with these ones, break up would come with car window breaking, slashed tires, phone calls to curse you out and whatnot.

Ladies before you break up with her guy, just casually ask him what happened to the last girl that who said no when he asked her out.

If he says "Oh, Lagbaja? we're still friend, matter of fact we make sure we meet at least once a month just to catch up" . . . you know you have a mature guy in your hands and a cordial break up is possible.

If he says "That bitchmotherfuckerslutwhoreomoaleoloriburukushegiadanbanzakoi. . ." just jejely carry your purse, tell him you'll be right back and get your behind away fast fast. Send him a text, an email, a postcard. . . anything but stand in his face and tell him it's over.

HCH3COO:

Quit lying. you ended it. In fact, after the breakup it's no longer compulsory to reply your emails, talkless of the days it takes.

You are truly uninformed but you feel it necessary to go full force and make outlandish statements despite this.

I said the words, now when someone refuses to reply, call or text you, makes excuses not to go out with you, see you, argues with you, wouldn't you say they've ended the relationship I may have been the one to have the guts to say 'let's end it' but it wasn't me who wanted to end the relationship. What I did was smart, I went against my feelings, because all signs were saying this guy wants to leave. Infact he had already left emotionally. Now before you go off making statements and accusing me of lying, why not just simply ask for the full version. There is no bias in this, whether I was the reason for him wanting to leave or it not, it doesn't matter! What matters is that he called it quits and I released myself by saying the words, in fact I think he was pushing me to say it, after behaving this way, he still could not muster up the courage to say he wanted out. I had to say it! Do you not think I am frustrated with this relationship enough?!! Do you also have to add your own!?

He pushed me away and HINTED to an extrem degree how much he wanted out of the relationship, told me he couldn't commit and everything, so yes he HURT ME! HE HURT ME!!! Especially as he claimed to love me only a week before he started this behaviour. I repeat. HE HURT ME! So, now that I'm ok and willing to talk to him, he is ignoring me, That is not okay, even if I did ignore him first, I had the right to after HE HURT ME!

Geddit!?

topup:

You are truly uninformed but you feel it necessary to go full force and make outlandish statements despite this.

I said the words, now when someone refuses to reply, call or text you, makes excuses not to go out with you, see you, argues with you, wouldn't you say they've ended the relationship I may have been the one to have the guts to say 'let's end it' but it wasn't me who wanted to end the relationship. What I did was smart, I went against my feelings, because all signs were saying this guy wants to leave. Infact he had already left emotionally. Now before you go off making statements and accusing me of lying, why not just simply ask for the full version. There is no bias in this, whether I was the reason for him wanting to leave or it not, it doesn't matter! What matters is that he called it quits and I released myself by saying the words, in fact I think he was pushing me to say it, after behaving this way, he still could not muster up the courage to say he wanted out. I had to say it! Do you not think I am frustrated with this relationship enough?!! Do you also have to add your own!?

He pushed me away and HINTED to an extrem degree how much he wanted out of the relationship, told me he couldn't commit and everything, so yes he HURT ME! HE HURT ME!!! Especially as he claimed to love me only a week before he started this behaviour. I repeat. HE HURT ME! So, now that I'm ok and willing to talk to him, he is ignoring me, That is not okay, even if I did ignore him first, I had the right to after HE HURT ME!

Geddit!?

lol. you are still missing the most imortant details. not denying he had anything to do with your decision to leave him, all I'm saying is you popped the question.

@ topic

I think that will depend entirely on the kind of relationship u had and the circumstances of ur break-up. . .

personally i get along with most of my exes for the simple reason that we were not only dating but were also buddies. it was easy to just let go of the romantic side of things and focus soley on the friendship

Just keep it cool although it depends on how you broke up though there are some cases where the ex would want to decapitate their lover with a machete on sight

I talk to my ex but if I could I'd make his life miserable!

It all depends on what led up to the break up, if it is possible to remain friends, will be great, but i have come to realize that after you are both married, it is possible for some form of jealousy in the partners that you are both with, except if your partners never knew about you guys past.

It all depends on how you broke up. My ex lied and started dating someone else b4 breaking up with me officially. So quite naturally, I resent her cos she always pretended to be the holy one. Hell, she was the one always saying things like "I cant wait to have your baby". She has been trying to get me to talk to her for 5 months, don't pick her calls, reply messages, she wanted to meet somewhere, I declined saying I was cold on a very hot day. The betrayal was collosal so I feel no guilt. I know what she planned didn't work out the way she had arranged. I know she's suffering and I dont care. She asked a friend of mine to ask me just to be her friend but I told him to tell her that I'd rather be friends with an inland viper (one of the world's most venomous snakes).

I dont owe her any form of etiquette, I hate/resent/abhor/detest/despise/loathe that being for being such a schemer. Good riddance to bad rubbish.

iykedee:

It all depends on how you broke up. My ex lied and started dating someone else before breaking up with me officially. So quite naturally, I resent her because she always pretended to be the holy one. Hell, she was the one always saying things like "I can't wait to have your baby". She has been trying to get me to talk to her for 5 months, don't pick her calls, reply messages, she wanted to meet somewhere, I declined saying I was cold on a very hot day. The betrayal was collosal so I feel no guilt. I know what she planned didn't work out the way she had arranged. I know she's suffering and I don't care. She asked a friend of mine to ask me just to be her friend but I told him to tell her that I'd rather be friends with an inland viper (one of the world's most venomous snakes).

I don't owe her any form of etiquette, I hate/resent/abhor/detest/despise/loathe that being for being such a schemer. Good riddance to bad rubbish.

Interesting!!! these girls dont seem to understand or realise that the grass is not always greener on the other side

iykedee:

It all depends on how you broke up. My ex lied and started dating someone else before breaking up with me officially. So quite naturally, I resent her because she always pretended to be the holy one. Hell, she was the one always saying things like "I can't wait to have your baby". She has been trying to get me to talk to her for 5 months, don't pick her calls, reply messages, she wanted to meet somewhere, I declined saying I was cold on a very hot day. The betrayal was collosal so I feel no guilt. I know what she planned didn't work out the way she had arranged. I know she's suffering and I don't care. She asked a friend of mine to ask me just to be her friend but I told him to tell her that I'd rather be friends with an inland viper (one of the world's most venomous snakes).

I don't owe her any form of etiquette, I hate/resent/abhor/detest/despise/loathe that being for being such a schemer. Good riddance to bad rubbish.

Cheese n Rice. . . . . . .HELL hath no fury like a man PLAYED.

friends to to someone who hurt me?
Hell no!
at least not untill I get over him completely!

@sisikill,I feel u girl, cldn't stop laughing at ur reply,so true n so funny.I mean who wld stay if a man refers to his ex dat way, Gosh too many syllables, hv tears in ma eyes!Now on my part,I wld kill(exagerrating here) my ex if I ever set eyes on him again, Oh my God,I so want to rip his heart out n just cause him so much pain,dat he wld beg to die.I wish he wld lose his job,b broke for years n just rilly suffer n he wld look for me so bad dat he wldnt find me,when his evil deeds had caught up with him n he needs my forgiveness!U guys hv no ideal wht dis devil's incarnate did to me n plz dont make me go into details!Am so hurting rite dat I cld bust outta anger n grief, sobs!Sorry abt d outburst folks,but seriously,if d break-up is cordial,then they can stay frds n dats it.Otherwise,if its like mine,then they shld stay so far apart from each oda!Dats it,

Kceelyn:

@sisikill,I feel u girl, cldn't stop laughing at your reply,so true n so funny.I mean who wld stay if a man refers to his ex dat way, Gosh too many syllables, hv tears in ma eyes!Now on my part,I wld kill(exagerrating here) my ex if I ever set eyes on him again, Oh my God,I so want to rip his heart out n just cause him so much pain,dat he wld beg to die.I wish he wld lose his job,b broke for years n just rilly suffer n he wld look for me so bad dat he wldnt find me,when his evil deeds had caught up with him n he needs my forgiveness!U guys hv no ideal wht dis devil's incarnate did to me n plz dont make me go into details!Am so hurting rite dat I cld bust outta anger n grief, sobs!Sorry abt d outburst folks,but seriously,if d break-up is cordial,then they can stay frds n dats it.Otherwise,if its like mine,then they shld stay so far apart from each oda!Dats it,

Me thinks u'll need to tell this story soon to get it off ur chest b4 u explode.

@Lord_reed,I rilly wish I cld tell d story,but its just too stupid a story to tell becos he handled d situation so amateurish,as in very very amateurish!He even called lastnyt,trying to get back in my good books n all,telling me hw he went to church n was told by a renowned man of God,dat he has lost his crown,whteva dat means!Anyways,when I hv pulled myself together,I'll definitely tell my story.

N:B- How do one quote?,bn trying to quote a reply n it doesnt follow.Steps plz!

Priscila:
Should you be hostile or keep communication lines with your ex? Let me find out.

Call him and tell him the sex you had last is horrible