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When A Deadbeat Dad Gets Old And Weary. - Family (2) - Nairaland

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Re: When A Deadbeat Dad Gets Old And Weary. by nairalanda1(m): 6:56pm On Dec 07, 2023
Reminds me of one similar story that i won't go into details, about a man my parents knew.

Suffice it to know, that when the man died, and someone called my parents and informed them....see when my parents hear someone they know is dead, they would at the very least feel sad and say some good things...but for this man, (You can guess..lol).

Someone whose wife and children suffered at his hand well well.

1 Like

Re: When A Deadbeat Dad Gets Old And Weary. by Nahunger(m): 6:56pm On Dec 07, 2023
eepeepook:
I no read, abeg. E too long.
Lol
Re: When A Deadbeat Dad Gets Old And Weary. by BRATISLAVA: 6:57pm On Dec 07, 2023
@topic grin grin

Deadbeats and their trainees will either congregate here or flee.

3 Likes 1 Share

Re: When A Deadbeat Dad Gets Old And Weary. by Greenfaces: 6:57pm On Dec 07, 2023
LadyRosa2:
As the topic implies, this is a true life story.

Although my knowledge of this family started around when I was 19 years old.

I will call this friend of mine Sarah, the first child and daughter of her father. This true life story appears sad, and in my quiet times, especially recently, I'm beginning to feel sympathetic to both sides of the coin.

A few days ago, around 6 am, Sarah called me, and our conversation went like this;

Me: Babe, how far, this one you dey call by this time?
Sarah:I'm going to drop my papa at the park.
Me: for what na? Person wey just enter town yesterday? You for allow the man rest small...

Sarah: no be for my house, I don drop am, pay him transport, and still give am 5k to hold the body for the road.

Me: Babe, I dont support this one, in less than 24 hours your dad dey the Road for like 12 hours.

Sarah: That one no concern me, no be me invite am come.

A day earlier her father had called her from their previous location, he must have gotten there only to find out his 'ex-wife' had moved out. He decided to call Sarah, and she picked up, accommodated him for the night and bundled him back to the next available bus to Makurdi.

Truth be told, the ex-wife no longer lived in the slum he visited. She is now in a duplex, paid for by his first son. Let's call him David. David is in Europe and through one of my kinsmen, had secured a 3-bedroom duplex for his mom. His father is not aware of this.

Those children suffered men!

Big Mama, Sarah's mom was abandoned by her husband when Sarah was just 12 years old. The same year, Sarah was brutally raped by a neighbour because of 20 naira, while her mother was bedridden in the hospital after child evacuation. The father left while she was pregnant with the 5th child. Sarah would hawk all manner of foodstuffs to put food on the table. When she doesn't sell, she sells her body for peanuts to buy pepper and oil to make even the cheapest dried akro soup.

Her father had remarried and stopped caring about their welfare, a federal government worker in a good money-spinning ministry. He got transferred to another state and started a new life.

When I knew Sarah, she already had a child, a small saloon and four more mouths to feed. She would work in the morning and at night she would visit lounges. Life was hard, and so cigarettes and drinks became her god.Sarah till date is a chimney and she does so even in the presence of my husband, he no longer minds.

One cold night a couple of years ago, after we shared drinks at my place. She narrated how she and her siblings suffered.

" Sis, say my brother travel abroad, no be my power,na say God don look us say we don too suffer. David go gather wound for his body, from one Lebanese and Indian company to another, na so machine go dey cut cut his body. So so blue ink full him body"

I watched with tears how she broke down completely, spilling her wine all over my tiles.

"Sis, na 20 naira e take to lose my virginity, 20 naira!"

", My father...Wetin' we do am?!"

Two years ago and some months , she got a huge break. She called me to follow her to Transcorp Hilton and made me promise that I 'behave' myself.

We met this man, well groomed. We were half into the conversation when she looked at me with a forced smile, and said to me
" Sis, this is the man that raped me"

The spring rolls in my mouth turned into vinegar, my heart began to pound, and I could only see everyone but the man blurry. I eventually kept my cool but was silent the whole evening even as the man apologised profusely. My baby was beginning to cry, and I took the opportunity to leave their table because I was feeling sick and nauseated.

In less than 6 months after that encounter, he had secured a bigger and well-equipped saloon for her and had given her enough to travel out to buy hair.

Let's talk about David. David suffered oooo. I remembered one time I was going through her old pics and saw a younger version of David, sickly with his tummy protruded.

" My sister, na poison. My father come one day,, carry am go makurdi, na so person call my mother say make she come do carry her pikin before them kill am.My mother enters Moto, and as she stops for Keffi, she stand for Road dey beg for Moto wey go carry her reach makurdi, no money na. We carry am waka from one church to another before God just save that boy. "

I looked at the picture again and gently dropped it, still overwhelmed with internal grief. The first time I saw David in person after he graduated from the University ( he sponsored himself with the help of his sisters), I asked in bewilderment,

" So na this boy your father abandoned?"

Standing before me was a young man, fair, built and with a height I reckoned would be above 6. In inches. No wonder white women couldn't get off him as soon as he landed in Europe. He got married to one and life in that family changed in a flash. I enjoyed it for I got a cut from my father's kinsman when he bought a property.

Their father is no longer with the second wife, as she left him after three kids. He married a third and is now a retired pensioner.

Last night, while shopping together, Sarah was laughing and I asked, " Babe why you dey laugh"?

" When my father comes to my house, him dey ask me why I leave one bedroom go enter 3 bedrooms with my son. I tell am palee, this house no be rent o, na my house be this o."

" So wetin' him come talk?" I inquired.

"Wetin' him one talk again? Shebi waist pain wey my mama dey go through na say he left her when she was in her twenties. The woman has not seen Preek 4ck till today, because she carries church for the head. Woman wey him marry when she dey 17 years."

I choose to use the word ex-wife, but they never really divorced because the bride price paid is still binding. The fact that this woman who has suffered so much will soon be a mother-in-law to a German BMW Engineer in a few days is overwhelming. I wasn't surprised their last girl will end well, she's always looking like something out of foreign red carpets all the time. Like David, she is tall slim, surprisingly Conservative and intelligent.

Palee will be coming again to grace the marriage of one of the daughters he abandoned. Can't imagine his regret when he sleeps in a well-furnished duplex, away from the slum where he abandoned his children and wife many years ago, only to find out the first son from his loins bought that for his mother.

E go to pain am. embarassed

But one thing is certain or I think I noticed, David and Sarah still bear the hurt. The other kids have moved on, and don't mind being in their father's life.

these things are too long. 2023 is almost finished. Please let's try not to do long long writeups again in 2024.

7 Likes

Re: When A Deadbeat Dad Gets Old And Weary. by nairalanda1(m): 6:58pm On Dec 07, 2023
Greenfaces:
these things are too long. 2023 is almost finished. Please let's try not to do long long writeups again in 2024.

Better learn to read long things...because one day, it might be useful to you.

8 Likes 1 Share

Re: When A Deadbeat Dad Gets Old And Weary. by rickleye: 6:59pm On Dec 07, 2023
eepeepook:
I no read, abeg. E too long.

Your loss ! It worth the time and effort

4 Likes

Re: When A Deadbeat Dad Gets Old And Weary. by PoliteActivist: 7:02pm On Dec 07, 2023
Greenfaces:
these things are too long. 2023 is almost finished. Please let's try not to do long long writeups again in 2024.
*Politeness*

Meanwhile you repeated the entire long write-up in quoting. Suppose everybody did same?
Consider editing your post

8 Likes 1 Share

Re: When A Deadbeat Dad Gets Old And Weary. by Fiscus105(m): 7:05pm On Dec 07, 2023
Many of them usually die lonely and miserably. The same portion is awaiting ..... those..."I don't need wife, I only need children.

Nothing can be comparable to the wife you married young in which both of you grow old together ( if God give two of you such golden opportunity).

Some people think their bones, would be strong and agile the way they are in their teenage, for the rest of their life time.

6 Likes

Re: When A Deadbeat Dad Gets Old And Weary. by pargelenis(m): 7:06pm On Dec 07, 2023
I generally like my tea with just a pinch of sugar but when you put two spoons, it becomes too sweet.
OP … well done!

1 Like

Re: When A Deadbeat Dad Gets Old And Weary. by NaijaCover(m): 7:07pm On Dec 07, 2023
Inukwa ooooo
Re: When A Deadbeat Dad Gets Old And Weary. by tete7000(m): 7:08pm On Dec 07, 2023
FreeIgboho:


Like Joseph having to be sold by his brothers. Sometimes you have to be put through suffering to reach your potential.

If only life happens like this. Usually what would happen is, the woman and her offsprings would die in poverty, while the man becomes one big time politician or perm sec or such!

This is not comparable to Joseph's story. This story is rather about a woman who made a bad choice that left her children abused and traumatised. People can always choose right. If you can't choose right, stay single; marriage is not compulsory.
Re: When A Deadbeat Dad Gets Old And Weary. by Error401: 7:10pm On Dec 07, 2023
Written more like a super story

If its true, you are a good writter btw

LadyRosa2:


Nope its not.

1 Like

Re: When A Deadbeat Dad Gets Old And Weary. by omooba969(m): 7:10pm On Dec 07, 2023
When shall we have a post on Deadbeat/ useless Mums?

Dey Play grin

3 Likes

Re: When A Deadbeat Dad Gets Old And Weary. by Darato: 7:10pm On Dec 07, 2023
One thing I've learnt in life is that whatever we do now, we should always think of our old age. As you lay your bed, so you will lay on it. This story is for both genders, think of your old age in all you do.

In another news, we are seeking dedicated teachers who loves God and Children. See the flyers below.

1 Like

Re: When A Deadbeat Dad Gets Old And Weary. by GreatAchiever1: 7:11pm On Dec 07, 2023
Greenfaces:
these things are too long. 2023 is almost finished. Please let's try not to do long long writeups again in 2024.

In 2024, try dey read books, it will give you the ability to speed read.

3 Likes

Re: When A Deadbeat Dad Gets Old And Weary. by correctguy101(m): 7:13pm On Dec 07, 2023
DaddyRochie1642:
Hope this is not superstory

Could be..

But nature/life and varieties be like Tinubu and Amala... Inseparable., cheesy

E dey hapun... wink
Re: When A Deadbeat Dad Gets Old And Weary. by noobody(m): 7:13pm On Dec 07, 2023
So the rapist got away,just by providing financial assistance for Sarah?
The story nor gel.

1 Like

Re: When A Deadbeat Dad Gets Old And Weary. by correctguy101(m): 7:16pm On Dec 07, 2023
FreeIgboho:


She doesn’t! She’s a WISE, LIBERATED girl. Suffering has made her wise. She’s LIBERATED, which is very hard to attain!

Though I feel I don't need to be married too to live . but

Sorry "Liberated" from what exactly?

1 Like

Re: When A Deadbeat Dad Gets Old And Weary. by Ubanz: 7:16pm On Dec 07, 2023
I will wait until I hear the man's side of the story. Women dey always claim saints.

6 Likes

Re: When A Deadbeat Dad Gets Old And Weary. by hedonido: 7:17pm On Dec 07, 2023
Fake story written by a frustrated, 'well educated feminist'.

6 Likes 1 Share

Re: When A Deadbeat Dad Gets Old And Weary. by CJStarz: 7:18pm On Dec 07, 2023
DaddyRochie1642:
Hope this is not superstory
Life happens,my dear.

1 Like

Re: When A Deadbeat Dad Gets Old And Weary. by correctguy101(m): 7:19pm On Dec 07, 2023
LadyRosa2:


Hmm...Well, I dont think she is entirely liberated in the real sense, deep down she wish to settle. But the past keep reminding her not to.


Now that's confusing.

Although, this daddy would like to hear more about what she's being "liberated" from... shocked

2 Likes

Re: When A Deadbeat Dad Gets Old And Weary. by Samsyne: 7:21pm On Dec 07, 2023
Hmmmmm ..deep
Re: When A Deadbeat Dad Gets Old And Weary. by CJStarz: 7:21pm On Dec 07, 2023
If he hadn't abandoned them,they might not have turned out this wealthy.
Not in support of the mumu man's behavior shaa but then, according to the Bible,ALL THINGS WORK TOGETHER FOR GOOD.....Ur Mum never broke her Faith in God.

3 Likes

Re: When A Deadbeat Dad Gets Old And Weary. by omooba969(m): 7:22pm On Dec 07, 2023
Fiscus105:
Many of them usually die lonely and miserably. The same portion is awaiting ..... those..."I don't need wife, I only need children.

Nothing can be comparable to the wife you married young in which both of you grow old together ( if God give two of such golden opportunity).

Some people think their bone would be strong and agile the way it is in their youth through out their life time.

So the woman's bones would be very strong in old age ehn. grin

1 Like

Re: When A Deadbeat Dad Gets Old And Weary. by Pootle: 7:23pm On Dec 07, 2023
another tori to play down a gender undecided

3 Likes 1 Share

Re: When A Deadbeat Dad Gets Old And Weary. by udemzyudex(m): 7:32pm On Dec 07, 2023
Nice story telling.
Re: When A Deadbeat Dad Gets Old And Weary. by Orlu13: 7:33pm On Dec 07, 2023
Nonsense story
Don't we have dead beat mothers as well
mumu feminist trying to push in nonsense story

is mohbad mum not a deadbeat mother
wat of all those useless ladies dat dump dia new borns inside dustbin and gutter

Foolish story written by a frustrated wannabe feminist..

3 Likes

Re: When A Deadbeat Dad Gets Old And Weary. by Dizzyyish: 7:34pm On Dec 07, 2023
omooba969:
When shall we have a post on Deadbeat/ useless Mums?

Dey Play grin

I remember when a moniker, TheGidRedpiller, made a thread about his deadbeat mom and the issue he had with her. Most people on that thread kept calling him a bad son despite his tellings of the whole situation.

The truth is there's a natural bias in this types of matters, so much so the term 'deadbeat mom' sounds unnatural.

If a guy does something terrible to a girl you'll see all manner of threats towards him (whether that's appropriate is a different topic) from males and females alike, but there's rarely the same level of intolerance for a woman who does something similar (or worse) to a guy.

9 Likes 3 Shares

Re: When A Deadbeat Dad Gets Old And Weary. by yewit37486: 7:34pm On Dec 07, 2023
Greenfaces:
these things are too long. 2023 is almost finished. Please let's try not to do long long writeups again in 2024.

Please let's try not to quote a whole post!! It means others have to scroll and scroll.. Thank you.

1 Like

Re: When A Deadbeat Dad Gets Old And Weary. by yewit37486: 7:35pm On Dec 07, 2023
PoliteActivist:

*Politeness*

Meanwhile you repeated the entire long write-up in quoting. Suppose everybody did same?
Consider editing your post

Exactly what I just told him before seeing your comment.

3 Likes

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