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Now That You Have Decided To Get Married... - Romance - Nairaland

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Now That You Have Decided To Get Married... by TheFarmer1: 11:44am On Jan 14
Hello, Nairalanders. It's TheFarmer1 again. Happy New Year and Happy Sunday to you all.
How has your 2024 been so far? Different strokes for different folks right?

Apart from being an Agriculturist and a Poultry Farmer, I have flare for other things one of them being writing about real life situations. I have decided to share an issue I have found out to be very topical especially amongst our youths and eligible bachelors.

I will have you know that I have been married for 3 years and I have 2 kids. So, I feel I am qualified to discuss some issues I intend to write down. This, ofcourse, is a result of personal experience(s). It's just a template you can juxtapose with your own life situation, learn, and possibly implement. This thread is in the Romance section because I feel it's where it will reach a lot of young folks.

Getting married to a woman, in my own opinion, serves two major purposes. Firstly, it affords you the opportunity to have a companion. On the long run, life can be very boring if you have no close relative or dependant or individual you can closely and effortlessly relate with. Imagine being in your 50's or 60's with no wife or kid(s). How do you think living will taste like? Why do you think men and women alike struggle to find someone they can hitch themselves to? If they fail, they keep trying until they get it right or not. Companionship. Try being by yourself for 2 months without relating with anybody. It may sound intriguing initialy but over time, you will realize that there is need to speak to someone, no matter how brief.

Secondly, paving way for others to taste life after you are gone. Procreation. A friend of mine will always say, "if dem born you, make sure you born others". If your parents gave you a chance to see, taste and enjoy life, make sure you give others a chance to do same. When you are married, it is only right to have a kid or kids to engender your lineages or achievements.

I will be very factual in my writeup and I will spare no helping detail. As a Nigerian, once you feel that you are ready to do like your father or Fathers did, you need to be armed with a number of things. The most important thing as a man, in my opinion, you need to have before you consider getting married or settling down is a source of income. Yes. I know some of you may think that is not the first, but let me burst your bubble- it is! If you do not have a source of income, you will find life after marriage very messy, hard and unpalatable. When I say a source of income, I am not saying that you must be a Jeff Bezos or an Otedola or an Obi Cubana. No. You know the way(s) money comes into your hands. Consider making it regular before you consider getting married.

Marrieage comes with a lot of responsibilities that you may not be able to shoulder if you marry without a source of income. So, that little business you are doing, that brings in money into your account, make it work. If you, perchance, wish to marry a girl who doesn't have a visible source of income or earnings, it becomes pertinent that you must have something going on for you in terms of earnings and income. Marriage becomes much better if you settle down with a girl who also has a source of income.

This thread will continue to be developed. Stick around. If you are following, hit the like and share buttons. It helps me know that some young folks are following.

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Re: Now That You Have Decided To Get Married... by TheFarmer1: 12:50pm On Jan 14
The next item you need to have before considering getting married is shelter. You need a roof over your head. Go for a shelter you can afford. If you are able to build something for yourself, fantastic. If you have to be on rent, that is also very good. Get an apartment you can afford to pay for. Avoid renting a house you can't afford to renew its rent. If you must live in a family house, you need to know that there is always down sides to living with your relatives as a married man. You need to effectively have rules of engagement to avoid see finish. Oh yes. Human beings can be unpredictable. Once you are married, there is usually this tendency to share your love, as a man, between your immediate family and the larger family members. If you want a lasting marriage, get an apartment for yourself. Avoid see finish. Mature men will definitely understand why it is very important that you get a house separate from your family house.

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Re: Now That You Have Decided To Get Married... by Jokescity(m): 1:06pm On Jan 14
THANKS FOR THE PIECES BOSS.
Re: Now That You Have Decided To Get Married... by parkervero(m): 1:12pm On Jan 14
Marriage is overhype jare
Re: Now That You Have Decided To Get Married... by TheFarmer1: 1:25pm On Jan 14
Getting a girl to marry comes next in line. As a personal opinion, I would tell you to marry someone you know. Intentionally befriend a girl who is of age if you want to settle down. If you want a seemless journey towards settling down, avoid dating someone for 3 months and then marrying them. Three months is a very inadequate length of time to familiarize with a woman you intend to spend your life with. I know some folks who dated for 4 months and married afterwards. Seven times out of ten, they realized that they didn't know who they married. Blasts from the past creeps in and you begin to wonder how you got here. If you are a religious person, now is the time to fervently pray to the Being you believe in. Choosing the wrong woman is a mistake you cannot afford to intentionally make. Pay attention to all the red flags while dating. This also buttresses the fact that you need to date someone you want to marry for an extended period. Red flags must not be swept under the carpet. If you notice something, investigate it. Ask the girl in question. Find out why something happened or why something isn't adding up.

A little white lie can boomerang in the future if you don't manage the situation well. If you have a child from your past, now is the time to tell the girl; like wise the girl you want to marry. Children from flings in the past has ruined many families, especially when they come into the picture later in life. Be open to your partner. You can't hide these things forever.
Re: Now That You Have Decided To Get Married... by Therepentant: 1:32pm On Jan 14
All this epistle on top marriage issue, I will pass.
The sooner people realise marriage is overrated and targeted at men to make life miserable the better.

The main reason people marry and give birth in this part of the world is to have children to take care of them when they are old, I have never seen anything wrong than this.
This life I came to live, I will work and make money and invest my money and make more money to take care of myself when am old.
Children /marriage?maybe/maybe not.

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