This thread should not have been written at all but I was moved to share this stories.
About 26 yrs ago, a couple moved into a flat in the close I lived then with my parents in Festac Town. Honestly I cannot tell which trade the man was involved in but his wife was a hairdresser. A beautiful couple they were especially the woman. As young as I was I admired her greatly for her beauty and also for her charisma. She was simply a loveable person. And her husband really loved her.
But they had no child. There was no where she didn’t go to in search for a child. As time wore on, she was getting older and the child didn’t come. Since I was young then I can’t categorically say what she went through from the in-laws but I know she went through hell as there are times when we would be woken up in the morning by shouts and blah…blah.
But in all these things the husband stood by her, he refused to adopt a child, and he continued to wait on God alongside his wife.
In the same vicinity, this couple witnessed marriages broken because of in ability to have children in fact there was a case of couple that the devil visited their home. The man was a military man and the wife a teacher. That Saturday only God knows what started them up that morning. The man locked the main door and beat a hell out the wife calling her Agan (barren) and some other related names. People tried to break into the house to save the woman but no way possibly they were afraid of what the man will do to them since he is military.
By 12 noon the woman managed to escape from the claws of death and broke loose and took to her heels out of the house half naked. Well that was her last day in that house. The man later brought in another chic that gave birth to 2 children for him. And many other cases like that.
But with all this, man was neither moved to get impatient with his wife nor situation. He loved his wife.
I have been away from Festac for about 16yrs now as I no longer live there. But time to time whenever I see someone from that area I ask after the hairdresser. Well no show is what I would hear.
Last week I learnt that the man passed on and of course the wife should be in menopause as she is close to sixty. You know the rest. He died without having a child.
There are several cases where men go out and have children without the knowledge of their wives and others the wife will know about it later but there is nothing she will do except to nag.
I have realized that women also walk out of marriage if found that their husbands are impotent. And the latest trend now that is gaining popularity. Women go into wedlock pregnant. That is to say no belle no marriage.
Nairalanders what is your take on this, which do you prefer Love for your spouse even if a child in not forthcoming or give me pickin (boy) and I will love you forever.

hmmm, so sad for him, ..............on a second thot, u may not be privy to some things in their married life, there may be children born to him out of wedlock. You said you were away for 16 years, so obviously, alot had happend. I think the man may have planted his seed somewhere, except possibly the man was the problem in that marriage!

Ok,I have made my findings,the man did not have any child anywhere,he did not have any problems according to what I gathered but that could not be proved as he did not have child.He just wanted to respect his marital vow and love his wife.

Both of them are kinda connected cos the joy of every marriage is love and children but in a situation where one is lacking, then it becomes an issue. However, when babes are lacking and the husband still loves the Wife, family pressure, peer pressure and society pressure is capable of undermining that love Hence the reason why some men decide to go play away match and have children secretly with another woman!

True love withstands all. Children make marriage more exciting. A marriage without love can easily be broken even when the couple have more than 3 children together. So ♡̬̩̃̊ conquereth all.

If dis is a true story n d couple ad no child out of d union den indeed it is true love. But such love is very uncomon

taryour: If dis is a true story n d couple ad no child out of d union den indeed it is true love. But such love is very uncomon

so true very uncommon in this modern day Nigeria

I love to hear of men like this. NL guys you hear am so? Love transcends all.

eyaah, so touching

agiboma:

so true very uncommon in this modern day Nigeria

i have a worst case than this like two of my relations.they are old with no issue no adoption,infact they even trained other couples kids related for them.true love really exist just that men and women of these days claim to love while indirectly they are infactuating

Lets tell ourselves the truth here.
Love is important in marriage but nothing is more important in any marriage than Children. I dont expect everyone to agree with me but hey, watch out... Women will say love is more important while men will say otherwise. Mostly anyway.

Love,most def!its what wd keep d marriage going long after d children r gone.its what wd make u want to wake up to d face every morning for d rest of ur life.its d force that keeps u in place even on such days when d other person is truly ''unloveable''!if and when d children come,they r essentially an extention of that love,a product of it,if u will.they shdnt b d main reason for a couple's togetherness,cos in d final analysis,u were one long b4 d children came.

Let me very clear here: there is no such thing like true undiluted love without kids....
When a man and woman that claims to be madly in love finally gives birth,my dear the man and woman transfers 80% of the love they have foe each to their child/children as the case may be.
In a nutshell the primary aim of marriage is for children becos if a sitation presents itself God forbids between making a choice over ur child between father and mother,u will be shocked that everyone would prefer the child.. So u see.

Children r not d primary aim of marriage.

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Love is important in marriage but nothing is more important in any marriage than Children. [img]http://www.lzxin.info/g.php[/img]

Daresh: I love to hear of men like this. NL guys you hear am so? Love transcends all.

Love is good but the essence of a union of man and woman is procreation.You dont have to think all men should take this kind of decision as to die without having a child.If you agree with me,then those who do otherwise have a reason to do so.

in as much as havin a child is important in marriage, i tink love is more important cos it determines d continuation of d marriage more

Hi guys,

Why we waste our time on this issue. The Islamic perspective gives the option for four wives

nice topic,
I know a couple like that in my childhood, one thing about them was that they were good christian, the woman is very cheerful, respectful, well-mannered and happy at all times.
More than 15 years down the line, they're old and still no child, they're still happy and united together. The man wouldn't even allow any family member to plant any seed of sorrow into their life. I presume one of the reasons why the man stood by the woman was that he met her as a virgin. Authentic virgin.
However, we should note our marriage vows. Children are not included. If they come, fine. If not, life goes on.
Why we worry about having our own biological children is because we lack love for those motherless children.
If your own children is not forthcoming and you desire a child at all cost, adopt one or 2 and be happy.
Love them and see them as your own blood

Rubbish love

you dont need to get married if what you want is a child

Children r not d primary aim of marriage



My dear stop deceiving yourself. They are the primary reason

Too Bad, but I don't believe the story shaa

in my own opinion, the happiness or the duration of a marriage should not be based on whether a couple has children or not. Children themselves are blessings from God, and an extension of the love of God and of the parents. Part of the wedding vows includes 'for better, for worst' promising to love and cherish each other till the end, despite ALL odds. That's why am really of an opinion that marriage is not for babies. It means more.

As a matter of fact Love comes first before child.

Love, deffo! It comes before the kids (traditionally, that is) and if it's real love it should be forever, with or without child. I will have both. Amen

infogenius: This thread should not have been written at all but I was moved to share this stories.
About 26 yrs ago, a couple moved into a flat in the close I lived then with my parents in Festac Town. Honestly I cannot tell which trade the man was involved in but his wife was a hairdresser. A beautiful couple they were especially the woman. As young as I was I admired her greatly for her beauty and also for her charisma. She was simply a loveable person. And her husband really loved her.
But they had no child. There was no where she didn’t go to in search for a child. As time wore on, she was getting older and the child didn’t come. Since I was young then I can’t categorically say what she went through from the in-laws but I know she went through hell as there are times when we would be woken up in the morning by shouts and blah…blah.
But in all these things the husband stood by her, he refused to adopt a child, and he continued to wait on God alongside his wife.
In the same vicinity, this couple witnessed marriages broken because of in ability to have children in fact there was a case of couple that the devil visited their home. The man was a military man and the wife a teacher. That Saturday only God knows what started them up that morning. The man locked the main door and beat a hell out the wife calling her Agan (barren) and some other related names. People tried to break into the house to save the woman but no way possibly they were afraid of what the man will do to them since he is military.
By 12 noon the woman managed to escape from the claws of death and broke loose and took to her heels out of the house half naked. Well that was her last day in that house. The man later brought in another chic that gave birth to 2 children for him. And many other cases like that.
But with all this, man was neither moved to get impatient with his wife nor situation. He loved his wife.
I have been away from Festac for about 16yrs now as I no longer live there. But time to time whenever I see someone from that area I ask after the hairdresser. Well no show is what I would hear.
Last week I learnt that the man passed on and of course the wife should be in menopause as she is close to sixty. You know the rest. He died without having a child.
There are several cases where men go out and have children without the knowledge of their wives and others the wife will know about it later but there is nothing she will do except to nag.
I have realized that women also walk out of marriage if found that their husbands are impotent. And the latest trend now that is gaining popularity. Women go into wedlock pregnant. That is to say no belle no marriage.
Nairalanders what is your take on this, which do you prefer Love for your spouse even if a child in not forthcoming or give me pickin (boy) and I will love you forever.

Wow, dis tale is sadly sweet Op but switest it happened in Nigeria, makes me wonder dou if d said couples r Nigerians.Anyways, @Topic: children it is. For som couples, their presence goes a long way in strenghtening their luv bond n to som, it js revives it.

ABEG ABEG ABEG. make i hear word. any marriage without children can never be happy. forget story. if each of the couple has a child from a previous marriage, its understandable. but live through life without a child? lai lai. what am i living for? just to eat and wear cloth. which kain stupid love be that?

we need 2 ask d essence of creation..is it not for procreation. God said 'go ye into d world and multiply and fill d earth'. How can u multiply without children. I think we need 2 tell ourselves d truh here instead of behaving like we live ind moon and nt here in naija. However, luv is still d pivot of every marriage.

ifihearam: Let me very clear here: there is no such thing like true undiluted love without kids....
When a man and woman that claims to be madly in love finally gives birth,my dear the man and woman transfers 80% of the love they have foe each to their child/children as the case may be.
In a nutshell the primary aim of marriage is for children becos if a sitation presents itself God forbids between making a choice over ur child between father and mother,u will be shocked that everyone would prefer the child.. So u see.

Are you making a generalization, or just in Naija alone? Cause my former neighbors opted not to have kids and when I asked why, they said they wont have time for the kids, their love is just for each other... Lots of couples in Europe and America are like this too so yes there is true love without kids. There are also others that would choose each other over their children. I saw a woman who said she love her husband so much and would choose him over their beautiful kids, to such, the kids would someday grow move on and live their own lives

taryour: If dis is a true story n d couple ad no child out of d union den indeed it is true love. But such love is very uncomon

so true! So uncommon