oh before i sign off i just remembered this one;
youknowitsnigerian when
the woman gasps for air on her death bed and gurgles and finally dies with her eyes staring open
and in the background you hear the director's voice saying "close ya eyes"
and the dead woman then closes her eyes.

When a guy expressing love must always go to some unknown dingy boutique wit his date to buy clothes.

When a guy taking a chick out on a date means taking her to EAT FOOD at a restaurant, is that all a date can be?

When an obviously twenty-something year old fresh faced guy with white chalk and powder in his hair and moustache is used to act the part of a very old man

When the only sign of a very serious sickness is coughing!

Where the sound track for serious suspense is used for something as simple as someone refusing to eat food offered

When cultist are always overzealous and not more than 6-8 in the entire group and always moving together and fighting over one girl with the main character

Naija films R IQ retardants

1 unnecessary scenes all through half of the movie. For example, peeps will be watching tv in a certian scene, and that scene will go on for upto 30 minutes without a word utter. A bloody waste of time and money.

2 The hero is usually fighting for his lover. Either by going against his parents, fighting other guys, or killing himself. There is rarely a movie where the hero is willing to die for his country you know a freedom fighter or something.

3 Someone will get slapped in the introduction, the interval, and right before the credit is rolled.

4 When you watched part 1,2,3, and 4 and still don't get what the fu ck u just watched.

5 When there is no serious story line. They can make a movie out of something simple as boy meet girl on tthe street, fall in love two days later they fall in love and live happily ever after.

6 Only stoopid foolish retraded love story lines. You will never see something meaninful like a true life inspired story, stories about freedom fighters, or some good educative story lines like I am sam, My name is Khan, Rain man, taare zameen par, the pursuit of happiness, remember the titans and so on. But you sure will see stories like girl falling in love with poor guy, family disapproves because they are some goldding mothafuckers, and then they waste your time from part 1 to part 4 of people getting slapped, people watching tv for 30 minutes, women been totally over dressed in the house, and going to bed with make up on combined with their stoopid horrific and terrible kissing/sex scenes. Very entertaining.

-When the background singer won't keep quiet, lol.
-When a scene with two lovers walking on a beach or people dancing in a club lasts for half an hour.
-When a person's in the hospital and all you see beside them's the IV drip.

I don laff tire o.

When the camera focuses on the tyres of a departing car for some minutes.
When the witches meet and initiates a new member in their coven after giving her kola.

-the family of a kidnapped victim pays their ransom on an uncompleted building surrounded with police.

You know its a Nigerian movie when you see titles like: Husband-snatcher 1&2, El classico, Our husband has gone mad again 1&2. When any struggling man/woman from the village leaves for Lagos this evening and comes back the next day with a Hummer..lolz! When church scenes are often filled with people praying like mad men and women.

Zi: The most annoying of all to me is d background song to A Million Tears

'You are the treasure that I seeked'

The luv that I seeked for many years was close to ‎​meee...

gulfer: When a character like Mr. Ibu tries to make u laugh with his lines but what makes you laugh is actually his shape and outlook.

that man is structurally funny.not lyrically.lol

When the actor is forcing himself to cry, but you know he's actually laughing.

.....a doctor shakes his head forlornly at the patient, saying "madam, we've tried our possible best. I'd advice you try the prayer houses/ native doctors!"

.... a person who faints and is resuscitated in the hospital asks the doctor and nurses "Where am I?"

-when every character in the movie shouts at the top of their voice at the slightest provocation
- when you see a scene with a native doctor
- when the character is portrayed as a member of the army and he's got a long beard or braids his hair
- when the girls on the poster are almos nude
-when the movie is rated 18 yet all the major roles are played by kids of about 9-13yrs of age

When a leg injury gets a head bandage.
when a security camera footage presented as evidence in court has the same quality as the original movie.
when they bind and cast

^^^...and when someone undergoes appendoctomy and the HEAD is bandaged!!

when a Desmond Elliot ( in his late 30s) plays the role of a Youth Corper (whatever happened to the exemption due to age rule? )

wwhen Justus Esiri is always shouting - even during pillow talk with his wife in the bedroom! dat man fit get heart attack one day o. make una tell am say e too shout

When u see an actress with a particular hair style and 4 yrs later in d same movie, d actress is still carryin d same hair style.....it annoyin...

when Ini Edo talks to Mike Ezuruonye's back. When Olu Jacobs is always the king and van vicker his son. When Van Vicker and Mike wear those silly traditional wears even when they are relaxing. When Camilla Mgberekpe cackles in the name of laughter.

please help a sister just by clic and ask your friends to do the same
https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10150774065819642&set=a.10150274940469642.350462.329115514641&type=1&theater


Many thanks

playah P: When a leg injury gets a head bandage.
when a security camera footage presented as evidence in court has the same quality as the original movie.
when they bind and cast

you are soo smart! this one is soo true!

when the way to indicate that two lovers are angry with themselves is by them turning their backs on each other

When one big man or woman is on a trip with the driver and the big luggage bag is carried into the house by the driver with just one hand with ease.

When a gun shot victim shouts oorrrrooooooooooo...before diein

When u see som1 dts dead in heaven..and their soposd God is telin such person.. its nt yet time for u to die...go bak to earth.

When a gun shot victim shouts oorrrrooooooooooo...before diein

When u see som1 dts dead in heaven..and their soposd God is telin such person.. its nt yet time for u to die...go bak to earth.

When an actor or actress wears d same face 5 years later....dey neva get old

When they paint their teeth with black substance to depict old age

like all old men & women have black burnt teeth.

wen d actress has 2 diffrnt hair styles for one scene...

* When the poison meant to kill you is written boldly "POISON"
* when the house boy is Akwa ibom (akpan or Effiong) the gateman is Hausa (Audu or Musa) and the house girl is Ibo
* The solution to one's problem is found in either a pastor, an Alfa or a prayer haouse (yoruba films)
* After having sex, the man will still be wearing Tommy Hilfinger boxers
* Poor people always shout at the top of their voices to make a point
* When a gate man finally marries a very beautiful lady and hires a body guard to stalk her and your mother gives your sister and the female house help a knowing look and says "this kine thing dey happen shay? this love ehn?"
* (Nite of a thousand laffs)The character tells you the name of the movie : Ramsey Nuoah and Geneivieve- True love; Van Vicker and Mercy johnson - Love in Tokyo; Segun arinze and omotola- beauty and the beast; Justice Esiri and Mercy Johnson- Love no dey look face(or blind love), Mr Ibru and Nkiru sylvanus- Champions league love; Pawpaw and Mama Gee- If love is a crime
* The Warriors in an Epic movie are as strong as the markings on thier face: no
* Finally, YouKnowItsCausedByANigerianMovie when you househelp burns your food everyday for one week and says "Oka Maram sorrie yo! na mistek"

I really enjoy home videos..

Btw please brothers for thos who have facebook just check on this link and vote, ask to vote for my sister to a pageant she really needs help ...
It's not long just share the link, clic your vote and ask your friends to do so...many thanks here is the link

https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10150774065819642&set=a.10150274940469642.350462.329115514641&type=1&theater

::Andrew:::
when it is marketed by

amaco investment limited
121 nnamdi azikiwe street idumota lagos
11 pound road aba
22 ndideng usang iso road calabar

. Lmao

trekkie: oh before i sign off i just remembered this one;
youknowitsnigerian when
the woman gasps for air on her death bed and gurgles and finally dies with her eyes staring open
and in the background you hear the director's voice saying "close ya eyes"
and the dead woman then closes her eyes.

nw dats funny