@poster   Pls don't compound your problems, do not look for any male companion rather seek God's eye and pray for the man, as u did say that his problem is spiritual. If you have exhausted all avenues and still no changes then you may quit the marriage and look for a caring man. Best wishes!

@ Seun, all

I am of the opinion that this forum needs "sanctification" and that has to start from Seun himself. Why is it that you promote disgusting romantic topics over other? To the extent that forumites are now playing on your intelligence?. I can bet my 2 cents on it that most of these stories are concocted and because they are aware they will enjoy front page, they cook it and you buy it. Let me tell you that most of these new members are actually reincarnates. They are opening new accounts because of their sinister motive. There is therefore a need to put up a more secure measure in place to disallow multiple acounts.

The cleansing can commence by prioritisation. What is your aim of starting this forum aside profit making? Traffic? Quantity/Quality of members? Solution Provision?. I mean, this has to be defined.

Until we start promoting intelligent and value adding topics, it is just a matter of time before Nairaland turns to Amala and Gbegiri (apology to Baba Adedibu) forum.

You have heard it all. Getting a male friend is not the best choice for you now. Look up to God, be prayerful, ask HIM to lead and guide you. HE alone can come to your aid. Just be patient and seek good counselling from people i mean good people.

Remember God who sees in secret rewards openly. Keep praying for him that God will change his life.

my dear Look Unto Jesus he Author and Finisher of our Faith

Why can't u make JESUS your friend today

useespeed@yahoo.co.uk

we need to talk, have faith, trust me.it will be fine.

pls since u re married u dont need to look for boy friend, the only thing is if u re not enjoying ur marriage is better for to divorce him and marry another person that's if u re still young, but if u not young i advise u to forget about him and live ur life. if u have children u can transfer the love to ur children and forget about him.

Getting a male friend would bring more problems.
Please I would advice you devote time to your job and kids.
Getting in touch with your childhood female friends, donot compound the problem.

hi dear, what u need now is counselling.sound one. u can call me on 07030218766 or email murphyy2j@yahoo.com. i promise u tranformation and turn around. it is guaranteed.

@myomy, continue to show your love to him, your are a married woman, go to the salon make nice hair, get a sexy show off night wear, spray nice perfume before going to bed. little by little he will warm up to you.

make yourself beautiful for him, cook him nice food, tell him how much you miss him when he is out. dont jurpadise your marriage with your religion.marriage is marriage, i wont advice you to start sleeping around. my girl do all you can to get your man back to yourself, he is yours and yours forever, no woman is worth taking your place ok

spora:

@ Seun, all

I am of the opinion that this forum needs "sanctification" and that has to start from Seun himself. Why is it that you promote disgusting romantic topics over other? To the extent that forumites are now playing on your intelligence?. I can bet my 2 cents on it that most of these stories are concocted and because they are aware they will enjoy front page, they cook it and you buy it. Let me tell you that most of these new members are actually reincarnates. They are opening new accounts because of their sinister motive. There is therefore a need to put up a more secure measure in place to disallow multiple acounts.

The cleansing can commence by prioritisation. What is your aim of starting this forum aside profit making? Traffic? Quantity/Quality of members? Solution Provision?. I mean, this has to be defined.

Until we start promoting intelligent and value adding topics, it is just a matter of time before Nairaland turns to Amala and Gbegiri (apology to Baba Adedibu) forum.

Well said bro, i am beginning to think along this line too, God bless you!

Everyone has spoken based on their understanding of what you want and probably based on other motives, well let me add my voice to it, if you are looking for companion, well its possible you get someone who is sincere and wont want to lure you into sin, i will advise that you keep talking to your pastor make him your close confident, im sure if he is a genuine pastor he will be the best companion you are looking for. I cant guarantee myself for that position cos as human being i might be misled by the flesh, likewise any other person. so think twice before you get close to any of these people that are offering themselves for that position. all the best

stellose:

@myomy, continue to show your love to him, your are a married woman, go to the salon make nice hair, get a sexy show off night wear, spray nice perfume before going to bed. little by little he will warm up to you.

make yourself beautiful for him, cook him nice food, tell him how much you miss him when he is out. don't jurpadise your marriage with your religion.marriage is marriage, i wont advice you to start sleeping around. my girl do all you can to get your man back to yourself, he is yours and yours forever, no woman is worth taking your place ok

Good one.

myomy dear this is my advise, if you feel having a male friend will make you happy and retain your sound health then go for it girl. But while at it please do not sin because having sex with someone other than your husband is nothing but a great sin in the sight of God.  It is called adultery and nothing more, please consider your chuildren. Really I feel you because I know what loneliness can do to a woman.  Every woman needs a man that will be there whenever you need him not some1 that would be running after anything in skirt. Please baby girl look for a friend and make sure he is a christian too not somebody that would not be responsible and abandon his own home for you.  Also, i want you to always have this at the back of your mind that some men do not worth the trouble so dont kill yourself over somebody that is irresponsible you have your life to live and you have your children to cater for some of this men are simply 'igi da eye fo' meaning when there is a proble most of them will disappear.

Did you say the guy beat you? Haba! where is his conscience and the fear of God, anyway God will judge.  Lastly examine yourself too, if there is anything  you are doing that you feel your hubby does not like you should try and change. It is well.

@poster

Without any doubt, all u are trying to do is to pay him back in his own coin. It is true that what goes around always come around, but as a Christian that u call yourself and i want to believe a faithful one too, the only male companion that u need now CHRIST. He is the only one that can keep your company and make u happy all the time of your life. So get closer to Him and believe all will be well.
You have to be strong for your marriage and your husband too. Look inward and check things out. Dont ever involve yourself in a relationship that will turn to BLACKMAILING at the end of the show.

It is well!

my dear friend, the truth will ever be ------, there is no where you can find peace except in the arms of God, go down and call the name of God will above all makes things pefect and he will heal your marriage.

@Poster,
Am so sorry to hear this sad story of your, anyway I want you to know that marriage is for better for worse. And you are the architect of your life; you need to know that you can make things work out well again for and your husband if you decide to make it work. There are steps you need to take that will make everything workout the way you want it. The steps are as follows:
1)You need to be prayerful, be a prayerful wife instead of nagging every time.
2)You need to go for counseling. Talk to expect in Christian line to save your marriage, You could mail this address for advise ( trueacts@yahoo.com or divine_impartation@yahoo.com)
3)Then try and read books about family and marriages, books like “What make a Man loves”e.t.c.
Am sure that by the time you do this entire thing God will surely grant you your heart desire and you will be happy again.
Please you can mail me at dolapotee2000@yahoo.com so I can give you some counselor’s phone number that you could talk.
Cheers.

Let me give you one advice, Go for the male friends and let him know or feel that u are having an affair, ok? ? Believe me, he'll kick you out when he finds out. You better move closer to God to save your marriage not asking for opinions that would scatter your marriage.

Another thing i'll tell you is " Wake him up in the middle of the night, kneel down and talk some sense into his greasy head so that both of you can salvage your marriage " For a man to decide that it is those small girls with thin trousers he'll get succor from, then you must have done something wrong I must tell you. So ask him what have you done wrong to deserve this kind of treatment.

I want to ask you a question which is For how long did both of you courted before marrying each other?

"Aboro lo n so fun omo Oloabi, ti o ba de nue a di odindi. I don talk my own o."

@Poster
If I may ask, wasnt there courtship before the eventual marriage?
Was he a christian when u met him?
How was his life style during your courtship?
How did u meet?

Answers to these questions will make us know more and how to provide solutions to your problem.

Personally, I don't think that having a male friend will solve your problem. Remember the "heart is so treacherous that no one can better understand it!" I suggest u discuss the issue with ur pastor (if any) and get closer to the pastor' wife and let her be ur closest pal ,

Believe u me dear, the closer u get to ur so called sought male companion the closer u drift away from ur husband and the closer u will definitely be tempted to touch each other; hug each other, kiss each other and before u know it, like a nollywood star, u will find urself doing it and at last curse and slap!!! 

Be ye careful and be prayerful. God can do all things if u believe!

I rest my case ooooooooooooo

Am ready to bless you and fulfil your hearts desires email me right away: honestysmith@yahoo.co.uk who knows a holiday visit to yaounde cameroun will heal your broken heart

Chukz, good advice u gat there

@poster, getting a male pal wld make no difference. . . problem are bound to crop up everywhere we go, it's better to deal with one issue first before u step into another! who told u the male friend u're looking for is an angel from Heaven Pray hard ok, if u're praying hard already. . . then pray harder. . . without ceasing

read my foot (sinature)

chukz4real:

@Poster
If I may ask, wasnt there courtship before the eventual marriage?
Was he a christian when u met him?
How was his life style during your courtship?
How did u meet?

Answers to these questions will make us know more and how to provide solutions to your problem.

Personally, I don't think that having a male friend will solve your problem. Remember the "heart is so treacherous that no one can better understand it!" I suggest u discuss the issue with your pastor (if any) and get closer to the pastor' wife and let her be your closest pal ,

Believe u me dear, the closer u get to your so called sought male companion the closer u drift away from your husband and the closer u will definitely be tempted to touch each other; hug each other, kiss each other and before u know it, like a nollywood star, u will find yourself doing it and at last curse and slap!!!

Be ye careful and be prayerful. God can do all things if u believe!

im quotin 4rm chukz4real, wat he advised is satisfactorily and approved by me !
ur response to this will go a long way helpin us to suggest solutions to ur problem.

fill and complete ur nairaland profile if u need private discussion, I've WRITTEN

Wow the issues of the heart have come to stay in today's generation.

Can you imagine, a thread is posted yesterday, and its already got 85 posts minus mine, and viewed 1298 times. This is hilarious.

Does it tell of the rate of emotional turmoil that noe rages amongst rash people of my generation?

Lets be careful in our inital steps. They lead us unto paths b leak and dark, which we shall only unravel, by the day. Lets heed moral constraints and injunctions.

Well, as for Myomy, I'd advise that what you need, is not a male friend, but you need your husband back.

I know that if you do not love him still, you will not call him your husband.

Read inbetween the lines Nigerians seem to have many answers to problems of the heart than to the troubles of the economy.

just pick the best that siutes you, but I must confess, that you need to dig deep in to your thoughts and devise a means of winning your husband back.

Save that shame that lingers near. check yourself and your compatibilities.

Come on, you guys must have dated. What were those things you did that endeared you to his heart. Can't you re-enact those scenes of yesterdays?

The ball is well in your court

Let me not start by burning your skin for your heart expression. but the answer to your worries is very simple, giving the fact you profess you re a christain. how about a very good pastor with a stable marriage. or better stilll a pastor together with his wife, mostly the ones that handles family circles.

God will help you.

Well I really dont know what to say anymore 'coz most of the ones u've gotten have said it all, but I attend Fountain of life church & there's a particular programme organized by the church for married couples "let's talk about it" (for female) & "Let's be frank about it" (for male) I strongly believe that if you come for this programme & you can also convince your husband to come for same it'll mark the beginning of a turn around in your marital life.
There are also tapes or messages by pastor(mrs) Bimbo Odukoya that you can listen to that'll encourage you.
The church address is 12 Industrial avenue Ilupeju but if you need any clarification you can call me on 08035885614.
Take care & nothing is too difficultfor God to do the bible said the heart of kings is in God's hand he can turn it whichever way he wants so your husband's case cannot be an exception let God be true & every man a liar.

Well, some have already said it though, but if u dont mind pls, how did u meet this man and hw was ur relationship like before u gate marriage to him? Though things do happen different way, guess yours is hitch that u need a male friend is not bad anyway, let me hear 4rm u and hits u back!

@Spora and Baba nee

I understand your stand but the kind of posts you suggest will kill this blog.
This is the kind of thing people want to see and hear, remember why
Ofunneka failed to win BBA?

Getting a male friend is like fire & fuel,
try devoice is off balance of life,
keeping quiet will give u uncomfortable life
ask him what the problem is. life is all about problems and how u solve them.
pray hard give him what he demand (sex) though there are persons that can not be satisfy we know, but try with prayers, try traveling to rest for a month with his acceptance
u will surely make it.
our mother suffer for our fathers' hand to the extend that he sent her home and got another woman pregnant as his new wife leaving us just like that.
our mother stick to her prayers she didn't try any devoice or quarrel, were is that woman & the child nobody knows, we are happy with him together with our mother he is DSP now if he go outside work he will take our mother along while we stay for one place they can not try avoiding each other like 3 days.
every body have cross to carry in this world that is ur own, but soonest it will be over because Christ took since his childhood to serve us but it came to a point the cross was over the same to we his children take heart.
good luk

Please forget about having a male friend. It will not solve the problem at all. I will advice you you take it to God in prayer. He (God) will surely make a way for you.

Please i,m begging you in the name of the lord don,t do what u are about to do. you are simply going to burn your fingers real bad if u go seeking male companys.most of the guys dropping their phone numbers and e-mails just want to take advantage of u and u know that.Please go down on your kneels and pray. Ask God to help u out,he always does. Secondly try and talk to your husband .do everything in your power to let him see reasons.make him understand that u are a woman and u have feelings.if it dosent work ,call in your pastor to talk to him.but whatever else u do ,dont go getting a guy for yourself,two wrongs never make a right . i will be praying for u too and hope things turn out better.i know theiy will -SHALOM-

@ Poster,Don't you have brothers? Talk to a close male family member.It's the only way it can't go wrong.