2mch: Ask your doctor . I hear these days you can pick the sex of your next child. It is very expensive from what i hear. Or you can do abortion till you get a male? Depends on your level of desperation. But ask your doctor.

Abortion ke... How is that a good advice?

toluxa1: It actually depends. For example, my younger brother is 15 and my mum bought him a Nokia X2. Up till tomorrow I made it clear to them that its a bad idea. Immediately he comes back from school, first place is to his phone, 2go, chatting. Sometimes I see him online at 12am. The truth is these things are a serious deterrent to the seriousness of our young ones. Many kids failing WAEC and NECO, fail because they are distracted by 2go, whatsapp, facebook, etc.

But if its a touch light for for example just for the purpose of communication, they its allowed.

PS: infact am going to seize that his phone, I don vex.

Abeg no vex lol..

I understand your points but that said, not all children behave the same.

Reason why I said that, my kid brother at the same ago as your lil bro, 15years, my mom decided to buy him a phone infact iPhone 4S at that, infact a contract at that. I didn’t support the whole idea of the phone plus he owns xbox also.

Sometimes, he goes to bed at 2am playing games and always on FB chatting away.

I and my younger sisters were very worried on how he is coping in school. We always shout at him telling him to sleep more and read his book more, the boy will just give us one look like that.

To our greatest surprise, his performance report came home addressed to my mom, so we opened the letter, this boy was above target in school o .

Infact when they were doing exams in their school, they asked him to attempt GCSE exams even though he was in year 11, and GCSE is meant for year 12 pupils. To our greatest surprise, this boy results came out, and he score 6 As and the rest B .

Since then we decided to let him be as we know and trust him that he is not doing bad in school.

But as for children of age 3 – 5 yrs, hmmm I’m not too sure if phones are suitable at that such age.

Efemena_xy:

No, I'm not thick, and neither do I rant.

I deal with facts and logic.

What's happening here is that I'm trying to reason with a mentally challenged excuse of a human being (you). Now, unlike you, I don't believe in chance or destiny...and I certainly do not believe that where the upbringing of a child is concerned, what will be will be.

That's a lazy, laid back attitude and such a parent deserves to be shot.

You are so C.O.N.F.U.S.E.D

You are missing the plot

Let me repeat what my point was all along. I said regardless of the home where the child roots from, the child can either turn out good or bad. Most parents/parent can only try their best for their child/ren and raise them up in a good way but that will not stop a child turning out bad.

Other factors affect children, not just the parents and upbringing. Factors like society, peer influence etc....so wake that your sleepy thick head and stop confusing yourself.

Efemena_xy:

You really believe that?

That the upbringing of a child should be left to destiny, because what ever will be will be?

I laugh in Greek!

In case you don't know, a child when born is a blank slate and is heavily influenced by those around it, and it's environment.

So it stands to reason that a child brought up in a good, loving stable environment with both parents, stand a far better chance of faring better with life than one brought up otherwise.

Are you thick or something I said what will be will be, who is talking about destiny here. I meant if the child will turn out bad he/she will so stop confusing yourself.

Look up my last post missy, I'm done with you. I've said my piece and it's left for you to continue ranting as usual

Efemena_xy:

And I asked you what your understanding of a stable home meant!

Stop hiding under Kobo's skirts / trousers and answer the question!

Efemena, I don't have to go into a long thread with you. I'm not hiding behind anyone ok.

All I know is stable home or unstable home, a child will turn out either good or bad. Fine stable home can have positive impact on a child but not in all cases. So regardless of the type of home the child roots from, what will be will be.

Kobojunkie:

Even a frustrated, bitter single mother can provide a stable home to her child(ren) if she chooses.

Nicely put, you just said the word in my mind.

Efemena_xy:

Which may even be a much better option for the child in question.

You and I know that in an ideal situation, a child brought up by a mature couple in a loving home, is a whole lot better off, than being brought up by a frustrated, bitter, single mum on the dough...

I disagree Efemena......I've seen loads of kids brought up by matured couple in a loving home turning out to bad eggs...Only God can help parent/parents raise their children. It's not by anyone's power.

femishosho@gmai:
To have a married mans baby?
tried to end the affair , i told him we were officially over and was successful until he came around my home and harassed me for sex saying he loves me and wants to commit to three days a week at mine and the rest with his family at home (as he works night shifts). So I eventually gave in because I am weak with him and he wont stop until he gets what he wants. Over the 4 years of our sexual relationship we never used condoms because he never liked to wear them even when i ask him to , and in the beggining when i used to make him he even use to pretend they ripped just so he could satisfy himself . sometimes we would use withdrawal method and most of the time i would have to go to my doctor to get emergency contraception (the morning after pill) which is not good to be taking on a regular basis and my doctor always lectures me about it.

the last time we had sex i specifically told him not to ejaculate inside , as i don't want to take anymore contraception but he still went ahead and did it . i never had time to go to the clinic that week as i was working and he never offered to go get one for me which made me very angry.

surprise .. im pregnant . he keeps ringing me wanting to come around and knocking at my my door but i haven't been home I have stayed at my friends over the christmas period. at the moment i really hate him and i can see all the selfish things he has done . I know for a fact if i tell him he will be angry and tell me to get rid off it , my instincts are telling me even though he says he loves me and wants to move in he will completely cut me off and wont want anything to do with the child . he's already got 3 kids anyways.
so even if i tell him i have a strong feeling he will make me get rid of it . I've never really been mad at him like this before over anything , i never asked him for commitment it was him who asked if he could stay over at my house . i do love him but its like i can see his bad points now .

so ultimately this should be my decision to decide what i want to do. why should i have to feel bad ?

this is not a one night stand this is a four year relationship/ affair . i don't really care what he thinks if i decide to tell him then thats something hell have to deal with fed up of having to take responsibility all the time for what he does ,i will not expect him to be apart , i wont ask for money from him or support and wont tell anyone its his so i wont ruin his family . why should i make my decision based on him and what will be suitable and conducive to his life.

At first I didn't want to read your post as it seem long to read, going through the comments on here, I first fell sorry for you that why are they lashing out on you this bad, this prompted me to read your post.

Babe seriously, it's you I can put the blame on. You need to learn how to control yourself. You told him you don't want unprotected sex yet you still agreed to him to carry on knowing fully well the results.

Well now you've seen the result now, too late the deed is done. Someone has given you options on how to go about this. Just pick one but all I could advise is whatever you choose please don't choose abortion and don't give your baby up for adoption. It's so wrong in many ways.

Good for you that you live in UK where you might find life abit easier for you. You get benefits, council house to name few....so you still have hope.

Just keep your baby as part of the baby is you anyway. Grow to love the baby as your pregnancy continues. Even if you decide you want to tell the man and he wants to force you into commiting abortion, you still have rights over your body and you can still choose to keep your pregnancy. He can NEVER force you into something you don't want to do. But I see where your problem lies, you don't know how to stand for yourself that is why.

I know what you did during your 4yrs relationship with him is wrong knowing fully well he is married so now you are facing the music now all by yourself. Just learn to pick yourself up and move on with your life. I pray God will give you the strength during this hard time of your life and hope your pregnancy journey is a stressfree one.

I wouldn't call this a blunder more like a very stupid mistake.

Mom was cooking egusi soup with all sorts of assorted meats, she was running late for work that afternoon so she told me and my sister to finish up the soup for her. All that was left to add is iru (locust bean) and palm oil.

Hmmm I felt so lazy to get up from my bed that day so I scooped 5 spoonfuls of iru into a container, poured water to rinse the iru from dirts and sand..

As i was too lazy, i just used another spoon to start scooping the iru into the egusi soup. Infact the remaining water from the iru water, I poured evrything into the pot.

After few more minutes egusi was done. Mom came back from work that night and I prepared poundo yam for her and the entire house. Most people in my family tends to chew rolled/lumpy egusi so while we were eating everybody started biting on salt. I nearly died that day, I was quiet and mom was like how come this soup is full of sand, I was like I don't know maybe it's from the spinach you washed mom

Days later I couldn't take the guilt evrytime I see her in pain while eating the egusi so I finally confessed. Thank God I was far away from her otherwise I would have received hot slap.

usermane:
Quite unfortunate. I thought only batteries explode on fire but today i 've learnt from your xperience that insecticide do.
Also my mom don't allow us taking much liquid prior or during a journey cos stopping to urinate is risky especially when u stop on xpressway,just in case out of luck, better to be safe than sorry,it might just not be your day.
Am sorry for your dad 's departure and congrats for getting ready to tie the knot

@ Usermane,

Any pressurised can will explode in contact with fire that's why it is always written on most pressurised cans to be kept away from any sources of ignition as they can be extremely flammable.

I only wish I knew then but was too young then

Thanks

I have three if I'm permitted

The first one, when I was about 10yrs of age, my mom was tidying up the house so she had loads of papers to burn. She was already burning some garbage at our backyard so I thought. I should help my mom out o, I carried the bin full of papers and headed towards our backyard. My two little sisters decided to follow me. On getting to where the fire was burning, I poured all the papers on the fire, instead of us to go back upstairs jejenly one of my little sister saw a can of raid and we thought it would be nice to burn it.

Oh boy, as my sister threw the raid can in the fire, we didn't know what to expect so I and my immediate sister stood right beside the fire, the little one that threw the can bent near the fire watching excitedly. The next minute we heard a very loud b.ang, the fire went all over the place and all I saw was my little sister rubbing her belly. My mom quickly rushed downstairs and grabbed her, put her inside cold water. There were already loads of people from houses away in our house as they didn't know what caused the loud b.ang.

I and my immediate sister were very lucky but my little sister suffered the most as after 30minutes of getting over the shock I saw my little sister's belly all roasted. My mom quickly rushed her to the hospital after treating her at home. Till date she still has that skin discolouration

It's not obvious to see but if you really stare at her belly people can see her skin colour is not even.

The second event, I was 15yrs of age, my mom came from abroad to take I and my siblings with her to the UK. My uncle had already finished our passport application so all the embassy wanted was for my mom to appear in person to be interviewed before releasing the passports.

So my mom, my big huge uncle, his wife and myself all went to the embassy. We decided not to take our car that day. After getting all the passports and the necessary documents, we were all excited. We took a bus, on the way the bus developed fault and everybody had to get off and find other means of transportation. This area was very quiet with bushes on both right and left side of the road.

We started walking quickly in order to get to the next available bus stop. My uncle's wife then sad she wants to pee, my uncle said not in this area that it's very dangerous. But she insisted, she was carrying ghana must go bag in her arm with some of our documents. As she was peeing, I saw a guy jumping in the bush so I alerted my mom and uncle. By the time we were ready to start going, 1 guy came out from the bush with knife in his hand, the guy attacked my uncle's wife coz of the big bag she was carrying, he used the knife to tear apart the ghana must go bag and all our passports and documents went flying on the road, my uncle went after this guy took him up and slammed him on the floor. The guy ran into the bush.

As my uncle's wife was still shouting, my mom quickly ran after all the documents, gathered them together and this second guy came to my mom after realising there isn't any money in the bag my uncle's wife was carrying. As this guy attacked my mom's handbag, my mom sat on our documents while trying to fight this guy off her hang bag. The main passports were in my mom's hand bag. The guy knew my mom wasn't letting go of her bag so he started using knife to cut the handbag handle not knowing he was cutting my mom's finger at the same time but oh no my mom refused to let go o..that's when my uncle came on to the back of this guy, slammed him on the floor also and he ran into the bush.

We helped my mom up with her clothes in blood and we decided to start running. Fortunately a car came along and gave us lift to the nearest bus stop. On getting home, everybody at home were shocked. I remembered one of my uncles saying mummy, dont ever do that again o attacking thieves like that, then my mom replied him saying, you want me to let go of my children's documents no way....awwww I love her... she was then taken to the hospital that night to stitch her finger .....

Final one was when I lost my dad, it was a painful experience as our mom was abroad then and we were small then ..we all had to move in with our uncle then before our mom came to take everyone one of us to UK....I still wish he is here with us today now that my wedding is near

cupid4ig: tonto no fine abeg she is just controversial thats y she makes front pages

Thank you cupid, help me tell CFCfan o

Meklex: Its my first time of cooking egusi soup, I added everthing and then came the scary moment of adding salt which I did to my utmost suprise tasted just ok, with smiles I opened my two cubes of star maggi and then closed the pot for a moment and afterwards opened it to taste it only to sense extreme salty soup....is the maggi guilty or am I trying to lay the blame on maggi??

@ Meklex,

You can't blame it 100% on the poor maggi.

Egusi soup is one of the soups you have to be extra careful with salt, maggi and stock.

The best trick is if using stock for your egusi, make sure you taste the soup before adding extra stock or further salt or magi.

Reason being that salt/magi tends to settle at the bottom of egusi, in fact to be on the safe side, the amount of salt/maggi you want to use should be at least be reduced as compared to the amount you will add to other soups as you may find out few days later that all your salt will now start oozing out lol

Other thing to also to careful of is when you are cooking the lumpy type of egusi, always add the palm oil last say 15 minutes before the soup is ready, reason is because adding palm oil earlier will prevent the rolled/lumpy egusi from cooking.

CFCfan:

Tonto Dikeh na correct bombshell

Only in your eyes CFCfan

No wonder Iyanya dumped her for Tonto , I don't know what Iyanya saw in Tonto Dike also ...

Yvonne needs to gain her weight bck on, she luks weird in the pic...

Sapphire86: Dis has got 2 b d most ridiculous post I ve read. Aside 4m no5 -becoming a beta muslim; all odas apply 2 any woman!!!!

I was about to say the same thing....so all you listed up there doesn't apply to xtian women abi....SMH

c.fours:
^thanks for responding.
my nails are not going to work on a yam but I will bring a sharp utensil to the market with me next time to test the yams. For now, I will be looking for color. but what else can I look for? ex. texture? is it good for the yam to be slippery?


you can tell I really love yams. But once in a while I buy the crappiest yams in the market and wish to prevent this from happening in the future.

LOL @ sharp utensil...you could ask the yam seller to cut the yam for you instead then just like Obowunmi suggested...

What do you mean slippery? Inside the yam after peeling or outside before peeling?

Thank you all.

If some of you have BB, it will be much better for easier communication but if not, I will email/call your numbers asap....

sassygal: Hi, i run an event planning and decorating business in Lagos. Please do send me your email address so i can forward pictures of past jobs.

Hi Sassygal, I have mailed you...

ifyalways: Okiez.

Send me a mail with my nld username at gmail and I'll forward you their contacts. Dunno if they'll go to osun though.

I've sent an email to your nld username at gmail.com...thank you.

zayhal: Why use relaxer on a 6 year old? Is her hair very tough to comb? Even at that, there are better remedies. I wouldn't use relaxer on a 6 year old, too much chemicals that may eventually damage her hair. At that age, they look sweeter with everything natural. My opinion.

Quite agree with Zayhal, relaxer on a 6 year old is dangerous....there r other things you could consider, one of them is depending on your location, you cld use hair straightener to straighten the hair if the hair is coarse/tough....this works well...I remember my niece, she is someone with a coarse hair that she cries when she wants to comb the hair, the mother started using straightener on the hair and this did help....but remember to apply hair cream to the hair prior to using the straightener and don't set the straightener to high heat.

ifyalways: Where in Nigeria? I know one or two in lagos.

Ifyalways,

The wedding venue is Osun State, I don't mind decorators from Lagos, I know that will affect the price obviously but that is not a problem...

Wedding event decorator, that's what I'm looking for Sammiejo

Good day people,

Who knows a very good wedding decorator in Nigeria?

Thank you in advance

The best thing to do as a wife or anyone in a relationship (especially we ladies), is to just remain calm down anytime he is upset, raising your own voice could aggravate matter.

My mom used to tell me that when dealing with people, I have to “mo iwa fun oniwa”. Since you know he’s the temperamental being, just try and remain calm at all times.

I know it could be frustrating but you can never have two drivers in one car…

I thot this is meant to be the job of MIL, never knew FIL do this also...SMH

Your wife is the solution to your problem, get your wife to speak to her dad...

@ OP, how can you be in love with your dad? Are there no more male figures out there? That's an abomination...

jidegirl12: Lol jallowbah,

Don't cross a preggy's legs when she's sitting or the baby will resemble you...I always do that when they're not looking

@ Jidegirl12

Very mean lady...LMAO

manure: For a disclosure . I am not close to this family in any form and shape . we are just a distant acquintances. But I'm baflle and concern about their family set up and I want to discuss it here .
Husband happened to be a doctor here in ireland with a good GP practice . Wife is a trained nurse and function as the husband practice manager .
I managed a travel agency in Ireland and the wife happened to be my good customer. I have noticed over the past 5 years her alternate month journey back to Nigeria and I was thinking she may be doing a very good bussiness in Nigeria .I finally got a break in the case when her sister came to make a booking for Nigeria travel plan in December and I asked her inocently what sort of business is her siter doing in Nigeria . The lady could no longer keep the family secret as She's is very disgusted with her sisters double life . She told me that her sister is effecively keeping a double husband for 10 years . One is a naval officer in Nigeria and the seond is the doctor in Ireland .I asked why didn't you tell the Irelnad husband ? she told me She's tried but the sister have a lot of control on what goes on in the house and It Is like she's using Juju ( jaz)on the man .I felt so sorry for this quiet easy going man that i don't know how to tell him . I was thinking of written an annonymus letter to his email telling him what is happening . The Naija Naval husband has sent his wife packing because of this woman which i think is very eveil and decietful .To Make the matter worst she came to Nigeria in Decmeber with her chuiildren and introduce the Naval man to them as their uncle . Chilldren 6 and 4 couldn't understand what their mother is doing . For all intent and purpose the kids may not belong to the doctor . I see this man everyday and I am very anguish knowing what i know and how to tell him. i hope to get a good advice form forum members

As you've said in your post, you are not close to the family so my advice will be stay out of it. Surely her secret will be out soon, just stay well out of the issue and mind your business...

Not hot