[size=18pt]Warning:[/size] All, this is light-hearted fun. If u ain't got a chill pill then pls keep on walking - jejely, nor stop for my joint abeg!!

An updated Christmas story for the young 'uns!

Chav nativity 

There's this bird called Mary, yeah? She's a virgin (wossat then?)

She's not married or nuffink, but she's got this boyfriend, Joe, innit?

He does joinery an' that. Mary lives with him in a crib dahn Nazaref.

One day Mary meets this bloke Gabriel. She's like 'Oo ya lookin at?'

Gabriel just goes 'You got one up the duff, you have.'

Mary's totally gobsmacked.

She gives it to him large 'Stop dissin' me yeah? I ain't no
Kappa-slapper. I never bin wiv no one!'

So Mary goes and sees her cousin Liz, who's six months gone herself.

Liz is largin' it. She's filled with spirits, Barcardi Breezers an'
that.

She's like 'Orright, Mary, I can feel me bay-bee in me tummy and I
reckon I'm well blessed. Think of all the extra benefits an' that we are
gonna get.' Mary goes 'Yeah, s'pose you're right'

Mary an' Joe ain't got no money so they have to ponse a donkey, an' go
dahn Bethlehem on that.

They get to this pub an' Mary wants to stop, yeah? To have her bay-bee
an' that.

But there ain't no room at the inn, innit? So Mary an' Joe break an'
enter into this garridge, only it's filled wiv animals. Cahs an' sheep
an' that.

Then these three geezers turn up, looking proper bling, wiv crowns on
their heads. They're like 'Respect, bay-bee Jesus', an' say they're wise
men from the East End.

Joe goes: 'If you're so wise, wotchoo doin' wiv this Frankenstein an'
myrrh?

Why dincha just bring gold, Adidas and Burberry?' It's all about to kick
off when Gabriel turns up again an' sez he's got another message from
this Lord geezer.

He's like 'The police is comin an' they're killin all the bay-bees. You
better nash off to Egypt.' Joe goes 'You must be monged if you think I'm
goin' dahn Egypt on a minging donkey'

Gabriel sez 'Suit yerself, pal. But it's your look out if you stay.' So
they go dahn Egypt till they've stopped killin the first-born an' it's
safe an' that.

Then Joe and Mary and Jesus go back to Nazaref, an' Jesus turns water
into Stella!

Gerra away jor. We no be yo! Men!

^^ I CANNOT FIT LAFF!!

How we ajegule boys go understand that funny trash?

Poster when should we laff?

just relax and open up your minds

you'd be amazed at the endless possibilities!!  

Madukaele:

Poster when should we laff?

after you've taken your chill pill??

Babe thats surely unreadable wif those slangs. I no finish 3rd sentence. Anyways be not dismayed dear so thanks for the trial.

^^ really?

okay - In that case, I go find simple jokes to pacify the simple minds wey dey Jokes Section

*scoffs* Simple minds ko sample minds ni. U urself u fit understand joke for latin, anyway u fit considering . . . .

Stop scoffing!

na me 'spose to dey scoff at you!

Latin? er. . .only on Sundays o!

Is true oh! Wetin una celebrate today ni? Cos ma road was taken by unwanted personalities

<screams wiff laffter!!!>

na which one be unwanted personalities again??

'n wetin u sef dey do for street corners?

hmm??

Efe jxt praise God say u no be me cos u fit commit genocide today. Coming home was such a tug of war. I don reach a street away but the procession was so thick that u fit use prick chok girl for yansh she no go feel am, I NO DO AM O(jxt for emphasis sake )! God i nearly lost it. Pray tell, what was it? Abi Jesus don return?

hahahaha!!

oh vicks!!

okay, I fit tell u - but what's in it for me??

hmm?? I nor dey do fruitless ventures

Oh lemme see **thinking** . . . (don't interrupt pls)

;d ;d ;d ;d ;d

Gosh! i hve to start from the beginning . . . . . . . .wait . . . . .

All right! How about a sexy slap? Deal?

Nope

No Deal

**Still waiting**

Oya baby no worry another will. imagine sucha lucrative offer. I pass

One more golden chance

Okay, Shoot!

OK BRB. Lemme load ma gun

try not to overfill sha

*brandishes a double barrell gun* wey am? wey that lady wey dey do ma heart yori yori?

<shivers!>

Oh sir,

I think she went: That Way!!

**Points towards the river Benue**

cho! first class murder MEHN.
.God! Efe u said river benue? **flungs arms in air** I said they wont hear, the girl na mermaid.

but na dem dey fine pass - abi??

and na dem dey play yori-yori with your heart all day and all night long - yes?

Hmmmm so u know what yori yori means?

Na dem be all in all concerning beauty wif extra bouty. Thats y . . . .*whistles*

. . .'n she pretends not to understand his statement

Ladies all over the world are known to be modest. Ah i remember that see through. . . . . Gosh it is happening (again). Anyway i'll ignore it. So y the shyness now?