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Domestic Violence: A Time To Fight Back by TONYE001(m): 5:46pm On Apr 13, 2022
The death of Osinachi Nwachukuwu shocked many and provoked controversies, especially regarding her marriage (Kaduna, 2022). When I learned of her death, I was first sad that such a great singer was gone; later, as more details began to emerge, I soon began to wish that we got things right in our country, sooner than later. Notwithstanding the myriads of testimonies that have flooded the online space, the true cause of Osinachi's death can only be established by an autopsy (Das and Chowdhury, 2017). Until this is done, statements about her death cannot hold water.

There are speculations that Osinachi was a victim of repeated domestic violence from her husband (Sahara Reporters, 2022). Other sources report that she died of throat cancer and that as a matter of fact, she was on life support for approximately two months before her death (Tugbobo, 2022). While we continue to wait for the report of the definitive cause of her death, we all must agree that this incident has vigorously stirred discussions on domestic violence online and offline.

Domestic violence (DV), or intimate partner violence, is defined as "a pattern of behavior in any relationship that is used to gain or maintain power and control over an intimate partner" (United Nations, n.d.). DV also refers to injurious physical, sexual, and psychological behaviours occurring within the context of an intimate union or any other type of union (Sardinha et al., 2022).

The experience of DV has become common in recent times. To further demonstrate this, I shall briefly take you through some very disturbing statistics. Studies show that globally, about 1 in 3 women and 1 in 10 men 18 years of age or older experience DV (Huecker, King, and Jordan, 2022). According to Sardinha et al. (2022), worldwide, about 38-50% of murders of women are committed by their intimate partners causing significant economic and social impacts for individuals and the government. The prevalence of DV against men is pegged at 3.4% to 20.3% (Kolbe and Büttner, 2020). A study reported that out of every three (3) deaths due to DV, two (2) are women (Benebo, Schumann, and Vaezghasemi, 2018). In their research on the prevalence and determinants of DV in an urban community in the southwest, Oluwole and Onwumelu (2020) recruited 400 women aged 18-73 years. They reported a lifetime prevalence of DV of 73.3% within their study population. Sadly, DV does not seem to be declining. Over the years, trends show a steady increase in the rates of DV. In Germany, 100,766 women were victims of DV in 2013, but in 2018, over 114,000 women became DV victims (Armstrong, 2019).

If we took a survey now, a good chunk of us may attest to have been victims or witnesses of DV. I recall many years ago when I was a secondary school student. We had a neighbour who invited us to his wedding ceremony. I recall vividly how the MC had asked him at the reception how he would react if his wife failed to prepare food for him for whatever reason. He smiled and answered boldly that he would "call her honey." To paraphrase his response, I think he meant that he would understand and appreciate the challenge that may have prevented her from preparing his meal and perhaps support her. A few days after returning from their honeymoon, this couple broke into a fight that left both of them badly injured. I still wonder what may have caused that fight. About a year ago, a patient presented to our emergency ward with burns. As we resuscitated and clerked her, she told us she got the injury while preparing breakfast for her children. The truth, however, was exposed when her relatives met her husband in the ward. We soon got to know that her husband had been physically assaulting her for years.

In the past few days, I have read a series of arguments on DV. Some quarters believe that the media is unnecessarily being too loud about violence against women and deliberately underreporting violence against men. Other people argue that women who are victims of DV must have brought it upon themselves. One writer on this forum wrote that "a man can never beat a good wife." In other words, this writer implied that all female victims of DV are bad (disrespectful, abusive, disloyal, wicked, etc). But are these claims true? The statistics above objectively prove that violence against women occurs at proportions far above violence against men worldwide. This does not deny that there are men that are victims of DV, but If we continue to separate DV along gender lines, we may never get to its roots. I wonder why DV is now discussed in two contexts: against women and men. Do we imply that the effects of domestic violence against men and women differ? Or does the law prescribe different punishments for men and women who kill their spouses?

Saying that only "bad wives" are victims of DV is shocking. We tend to sit in the comforts of our homes and assert skewed opinions that are nothing but baseless. Most of what we know is limited to what the media reports but we manage to alter the narratives of events in ways that suit our beliefs. For example, because some of us have concluded in our hearts that only "bad wives" are victims of domestic violence, whenever we come across stories of women that are physically assaulted by their husbands, we quickly assume that they must have done something terribly bad to warrant her husband's actions. We do not query the husband, and we are hardly bothered that the man may have infringed on the rights of the woman. We do not bother that this may have been a case of attempted murder, and if nothing is done, the husband may eventually kill her, or another victim. Our entire focus falls on the woman, and we begin to probe the "evil" she must have committed. I ask, aside from a direct and immediate threat to life where alternative actions are impossible, is there any other acceptable reason to assault a human or to commit murder? Assuming a wife abuses her husband, does this qualify as a reason to physically attack her and inflict varying degrees of life-threatening injuries on her? If this were so, would the wife be also permitted to assault and kill her husband if he abuses or disrespects her? If we continue like this, our society would become a replica of the animal kingdom where actions are directed by primitive instincts rather than objective reasoning.

Why do spouses physically assault themselves? Why would a husband hit his wife? Why would a wife attack her husband? To get to the roots of domestic violence, we must trace the causes. Economic problems, husband's drug/alcohol abuse, husband's family interference, husband's suspicion, religious and cultural misunderstandings, husband's remarriage, and children from previous husband's or wife's marriages were some identified causes of DV (Rahnavardi et al., 2017). In a local study (Igbolekwu et al., 2021), 82.3% of respondents believe that the major cause of DV against women is the economic dependence of women (or wives) on men (or their husbands), 52.3% agree that communities tolerate and encourage some abusive behaviours, and as much as 61.5% of the respondents think that some religious and traditional beliefs support DV.

A BBC report (Obidiebube, 2018) made a shocking revelation: Section 55 of the Penal Code (applicable in Northern Nigeria) allows a husband to physically assault his wife as far as it does not cause serious bodily harm. What is more shocking is the Law's definition of bodily harm. The Law defined bodily harm as harm severe enough to warrant hospital admission for a minimum of 21 days! Ironically, we also have a Violence Against Persons Prohibition Act for 2015 that stands against different kinds of violence. This disparity in the law further makes it difficult to secure justice for victims of DV.

Some of our cultural practices support DV. Historically, in the Igbo culture, for instance, the dominant role of women "is to make pure wives for their honourable husbands. In marriage, they are expected to be submissive to their husbands, do housework and domestic chores, farming, and bear children" (Egbo, 2021). But are these roles still exclusively for women today? [b]Times have changed and the economy has become complex. These days, to maintain a home, both husband and wife have to earn some money. If a husband and his wife leave for work at 8 am and return at 5 pm, would the husband be fair if he expects his exhausted wife to hurry to the kitchen and begin to pound akpu for dinner because it is exclusively her responsibility according to the African tradition? In some instances, if the wife fails to do this, she is considered disrespectful and not submissive and she may be beaten. Some of us are hypocritical without knowing it. Civilization and technology have happened to the original African tradition but instead of accepting and living with all the good changes that come with these, we tend to be selective. We accept changes that suit our purpose and favour us and deny changes that may favour others. For example, we accepted Western education because it promises to improve our lives. We accepted computers and other technological devices because they ease our lives. But some of us refuse to accept that role of the African woman in our society has greatly changed. With the advancement of knowledge, we now know that men and women are both humans and no one is above the other. They both have equal rights and equal responsibilities. Cooking, washing dishes, bathing children, and sweeping are not exclusive roles of women just like going out to look for money is not an exclusive role of a man. [/b]

I believe the first step to stopping domestic violence is redefining marriage. Some of us have lines in our heads separating the responsibilities of a husband and a wife. In real sense, such distinct lines do not exist. Couples ideally should live in a fluid environment where things flow naturally. The idea of marriage is to have two people come together, support each other, and improve their lives while mutually enjoying their days. Marriage is a way of life and not an obligation where responsibilities are shared and delegated. In marriage, any capable hand can meet any responsibility without waiting for anyone. A husband should be able to bathe his children, sweep the house, do the laundry, and cook breakfast whether or not his wife is at home. A wife should be able to do these things, and provide/contribute money for upkeep on impulse.

By God's design, true love should be the fuel that should power the home. This is lost when people marry for the wrong reasons. If pure, undiluted love is lacking in any home, domestic violence is likely. If you love your wife as you love yourself, you would never raise a finger to hit her, unless you can hit yourself. If you love your wife absolutely, you would not have unrealistic expectations of her. If you love your wife as you love yourself, forgiveness, moving on, and not archiving faults should be natural habits.

Dear Parents, it is high time we began to raise our children the right way. If we train them well and demonstrate good examples before them, they would not grow to become monsters to their spouses. Dear fathers, if you hit your wife in front of your children, expect the same from them when they grow. If you sit in the parlour, watching TV all day without helping your wife in the kitchen, expect your son to be a bad husband when he grows up.

The government has a lot of roles to play in combating domestic violence. Strong laws must be made and the government must have the willpower to enforce these laws.

As private citizens, we also have roles to play if we must kick out DV. The mind-your-business culture is not African. Here, we do not mind our businesses! If you suspect your neighbour is a victim of DV, act immediately and report to the authorities whether or not the neighbour confides in you.

Our religious leaders must modify their teachings and encourage their members to take decisive steps if being abused. Members should be encouraged to separate from their spouses and they should be supported. Our religious leaders must be willing to get the authorities involved if they suspect that their member(s) is/are victim(s) of DV.

As I conclude, I would like to leave this last note to victims of DV. Please, prioritize your life over anything. Your life is paramount. Separate yourself from your spouse now that you still can. Beyond this, you should also report him/her to the authorities and ensure he/she is prosecuted and put behind bars for a long time. If you take these actions, you would have successfully protected future victims of your spouse.

Tonye001.

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Re: Domestic Violence: A Time To Fight Back by TONYE001(m): 5:48pm On Apr 13, 2022
Works Cited

Armstrong, M. (2019, November 25). Violence against women continues to rise in Germany. Statista Infographics. https://www.statista.com/chart/20087/domestic-violence-against-women-germany/

Benebo, F. O., Schumann, B., & Vaezghasemi, M. (2018). Intimate partner violence against women in Nigeria: a multilevel study investigating the effect of women’s status and community norms. BMC Women’s Health, 18(1). https://doi.org/10.1186/s12905-018-0628-7

Das, A., & Chowdhury, R. (2017). Searching cause of death through different autopsy methods: A new initiative. Journal of Family Medicine and Primary Care, 6(2), 191. https://doi.org/10.4103/jfmpc.jfmpc_194_16

Egbo, G. (2021, June 13). The Life Of An Igbo Woman Pre-Colonial Times. The Guardian Nigeria News - Nigeria and World News. https://guardian.ng/life/the-life-of-an-igbo-woman-pre-colonial-times/

Huecker, M., King, K., Jordan, G. (2022, March 7). Domestic Violence. StatPearls. https://www.statpearls.com/ArticleLibrary/viewarticle/40654

Igbolekwu, C., Arusukwu, O., Nwogu, J., Rasak, B., and Asamu, F. (2021). Domestic Violence against Women in the Nigerian Rural Context. Journal of International Women’s Studies, 22(1). Retrieved from https://www.researchgate.net/publication/349172569_Domestic_Violence_against_Women_in_the_Nigerian_Rural_Context_Domestic_Violence_against_Women_in_the_Nigerian_Rural_Context

Kaduna, G. (2022, April 9). Osinachi Nwachukwu brutalised by husband before her death — Singer alleges. Premium Times Nigeria. https://www.premiumtimesng.com/entertainment/music/522872-osinachi-nwachukwu-brutalised-by-husband-before-her-death-singer-alleges.html

Kolbe, V., & Büttner, A. (2020). Domestic Violence Against Men— Prevalence and Risk Factors. Deutsches Ärzteblatt International. https://doi.org/10.3238/arztebl.2020.0534

Nigerian Government Vows To Get Justice For Gospel Singer, Osinachi Who Died From Alleged Domestic Violence. (2022, April 11). Sahara Reporters. https://saharareporters.com/2022/04/11/nigerian-government-vows-get-justice-gospel-singer-osinachi-who-died-alleged-domestic

Obidiebube, O. (2018). Husband get right to beat wife for Nigeria, oda sexist laws. Retrieved from: https://www.bbc.com/pidgin/tori-45418226

Oluwole, E., Onwumelu, N., and Okafor, I. (2020). Prevalence and determinants of intimate partner violence among adult women in an urban community in Lagos, Southwest Nigeria. Panafrican-Med-Journal, 36(345). 10.11604/pamj.2020.36.345.24402

Rahnavardi, M., Shayan, A., Babaei, M., Khalesi, Z. B., Havasian, M. R., & Ahmadi, M. (2017). Investigating Types and Causes of Domestic Violence against Women and Identifying Strategies to Deal with It from the Perspective of Victims. Research Journal of Pharmacy and Technology, 10(10), 3637. https://doi.org/10.5958/0974-360x.2017.00660.6

Sardinha, L., Maheu-Giroux, M., Stöckl, H., Meyer, S. R., & García-Moreno, C. (2022). Global, regional, and national prevalence estimates of physical or sexual, or both, intimate partner violence against women in 2018. The Lancet, 399(10327), 803–813. https://doi.org/10.1016/s0140-6736(21)02664-7

Tugbobo, T. (2022, April 10). Tributes as Ekwueme singer, Osinachi dies at 42. Punch Newspapers. https://punchng.com/tributes-as-ekwueme-singer-osinachi-dies-at-42/

United Nations.. (n.d.). Welcome to the United Nations Retrieved April 13, 2022, from https://www.un.org/en/coronavirus/what-is-domestic-abuse

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Re: Domestic Violence: A Time To Fight Back by babaalagbo11(m): 5:53pm On Apr 13, 2022
Honestly it's getting out of hand....learn to control your anger as husband and wife.. remember your children, remember reason why you say I do to each other...say no to domestic violence.....

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Re: Domestic Violence: A Time To Fight Back by Mindlog: 6:24pm On Apr 13, 2022
Nice write up.

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Re: Domestic Violence: A Time To Fight Back by usj(m): 7:32pm On Apr 13, 2022
Good write up with sources we can not check. I strongly condemn all forms of abuse and strongly encourage Love and respect.

However, one thing I hate most especially from the woman side is, most believe its only women that suffer from domestic violence.

We should all condemn violence against everyone and not shout only when it's against a woman, but when it happens to a man, we say "stop complaining is he not a man"? Or simply downplay it.

So, if he is a man he can be verbally abuse, emotionally abuse or even physically abuse? (some women and stronger than their men).

So, if you're in a toxic relationship, use your tongue to count your teeth. Forget about what people will say and act.

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Re: Domestic Violence: A Time To Fight Back by emmanuelbrown26: 7:53pm On Apr 13, 2022
I read everything, from d beginning till d end but u didn't ask questions why DV is so so rampant this generation?
U see, ever since daughters of eve open eyes, na so wahala cum enter for family.
Since daughters of eve wan their simps husband to be pampering them and simps husband no cum get strength to pamper, na so wahala enter.
Infact daughters of eve all deserves to be in their fathers houses

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Re: Domestic Violence: A Time To Fight Back by Kobojunkie: 8:05pm On Apr 13, 2022
emmanuelbrown26:
1. I read everything, from d beginning till d end but u didn't ask questions why DV is so so rampant this generation?

2. U see, ever since daughters of eve open eyes, na so wahala cum enter for family. Since daughters of eve wan their simps husband to be pampering them and simps husband no cum get strength to pamper, na so wahala enter.
Infact daughters of eve all deserves to be in their fathers houses
1. The answer to that question is obvious! undecided

2. Spoken like a typical Nigerian. Ever attempting to deflect from the problem, in order to avoid any form of responsibility. undecided

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Re: Domestic Violence: A Time To Fight Back by TONYE001(m): 8:56pm On Apr 13, 2022
usj:
Good write up with sources we can not check. I strongly condemn all forms of abuse and strongly encourage Love and respect.

However, one thing I hate most especially from the woman side is, most believe its only women that suffer from domestic violence.

We should all condemn violence against everyone and not shout only when it's against a woman, but when it happens to a man, we say "stop complaining is he not a man"? Or simply downplay it.

So, if he is a man he can be verbally abuse, emotionally abuse or even physically abuse? (some women and stronger than their men).

So, if you're in a toxic relationship, use your tongue to count your teeth. Forget about what people will say and act.

1. The sources are all on the internet. Anyone can check them anytime. Google the topics of the papers I referenced and you'd find them.

2. I campaign against all forms of violence, whether man or woman. The reason everyone is talking about violence against women now is because a female is the most recent victim of DM.

3. I agree with your last point, thank you.

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Re: Domestic Violence: A Time To Fight Back by TONYE001(m): 9:00pm On Apr 13, 2022
emmanuelbrown26:
I read everything, from d beginning till d end but u didn't ask questions why DV is so so rampant this generation?
U see, ever since daughters of eve open eyes, na so wahala cum enter for family.
Since daughters of eve wan their simps husband to be pampering them and simps husband no cum get strength to pamper, na so wahala enter.
Infact daughters of eve all deserves to be in their fathers houses

So, "opening eyes" is only good for sons of Adam? Are the "daughters of Eve" not humans like the sons of Adam? Any difference?

If you read everything as you claim, you'd see that the reasons why DV is rampant were outlined and discussed. Check again, please.

@ your last statement: well, the "daughters of Eve" were in their fathers' houses before the sons of Adam went begging and kneeling, asking them to marry them, no?

Let's stop running away from the issue to score cheap points. Today's discussion is not about who stays in her father's house and who doesn't. This thread is about something very important that needs urgent attention. Please think along this line.

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Re: Domestic Violence: A Time To Fight Back by emmanuelbrown26: 9:05pm On Apr 13, 2022
TONYE001:


So, "opening eyes" is only good for sons of Adam? Are the "daughters of Eve" not humans like the sons of Adam? Any difference?

If you read everything as you claim, you'd see that the reasons why DM is rampant were outlined and discussed. Check again, please.

@ your last statement: well, the "daughters of Eve" were in their fathers' houses before the sons of Adam went begging and kneeling, asking them to marry them, no?

Let's stop running away from the issue to score cheap points. Today's discussion is not about who stays in her father's house and who doesn't. This thread is about something very important that needs urgent attention. Please think along this line.
Some daughters of eve deserves better beating

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Re: Domestic Violence: A Time To Fight Back by TONYE001(m): 9:11pm On Apr 13, 2022
emmanuelbrown26:

Some daughters of eve deserves better beating

And what would happen to some sons of Adam? So we now beat people simply because they act in ways that offend us? Hope the sons of Adam would also be able to beat other sons of Adam of equal strengths when they offend them?

I've seen bullies hide their tails between their hind legs when they meet their peers! You haven't?

I strongly hope that after reading the OP, people like you would change for the better. Otherwise, the next person they assault may land them in trouble with the law, if not worse.

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Re: Domestic Violence: A Time To Fight Back by emmanuelbrown26: 9:32pm On Apr 13, 2022
TONYE001:


And what would happen to some sons of Adam? So we now beat people simply because they act in ways that offend us? Hope the sons of Adam would also be able to beat other sons of Adam of equal strengths when they offend them?

I've seen bullies hide their tails between their hind legs when they meet their peers! You haven't?

I strongly hope that after reading the OP, people like you would change for the better. Otherwise, the next person they assault may land them in trouble with the law, if not worse.
If u all want to get it right, I believe u all should start giving daughters of eve good orientation. Its not all about beating, daughters of eve we hv this day are something else, they can push a man to d wall and when they do, do u expect a man to fold his hands bcs she is a woman?
I only blame so many simps husband that gave them d mindset that all men tolerates them bcs of their rotten pussies

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Re: Domestic Violence: A Time To Fight Back by emmanuelbrown26: 9:33pm On Apr 13, 2022
Kobojunkie:
1. The answer to that question is obvious! undecided

2. Spoken like a typical Nigerian. Ever attempting to deflect from the problem, in order to avoid any form of responsibility. undecided
u ladies should start giving giivng girls orientation, u csnt be playing d victim card all d time.
Re: Domestic Violence: A Time To Fight Back by TONYE001(m): 9:36pm On Apr 13, 2022
emmanuelbrown26:

If u all want to get it right, I believe u all should start giving daughters of eve good orientation. Its not all about beating, daughters of eve we hv this day are something else, they can push a man to d wall and when they do, do u expect a man to fold his hands bcs she is a woman?
I only blame so many simps husband that gave them d mindset that all men tolerates them bcs of their rotten pussies

Actually, as I had pointed in the original post, I mentioned that parents have very important roles to play. Parents must train their children (MALES and FEMALES) rightly. Both genders need some training.

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Re: Domestic Violence: A Time To Fight Back by emmanuelbrown26: 9:45pm On Apr 13, 2022
TONYE001:


Actually, as I had pointed in the original post, I mentioned that parents have very important roles to play. Parents must train their children (MALES and FEMALES) rightly. Both genders need some training.
Mostly should be females. See, I hv volunteered with an NGO on domestic violence and child abuse for 10 solid months without pay, u did it to know marriage wahala and I know why I left them.
I hv worked with females and males. D issue is not about parents training their sons and daughters, sons heeds to d training more than daughters of eve.
Some daughters of eve deserves better beating before they would understand some certain things. I hv seen a lot in them

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Re: Domestic Violence: A Time To Fight Back by Mindlog: 9:49pm On Apr 13, 2022
emmanuelbrown26:

Some daughters of eve deserves better beating

Same you hyperventilating, would urinate in your boxers when a cadet in the Nigerian Defense Academy confront you.. na for woman matter your body dey hot.

That you grew up seeing females in your family being beaten up by the men does not make it right.

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Re: Domestic Violence: A Time To Fight Back by emmanuelbrown26: 9:52pm On Apr 13, 2022
Mindlog:


Same you hyperventilating, would urinate in your boxers when a cadet in the Nigerian Defense Academy confront you.. na for woman matter your body dey hot.

That you grew up seeing females in your family being beaten up by the men does not make it right.
One thing about me is that I don't make mouth on a faceless forum, so I won't go their. We'll I gat no one, so say something else.
Some daughters of eve deserves better beating, marriageable women were last seen late 1990s and early 2000s. U see from 2005 down d Lane are all rubbish

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Re: Domestic Violence: A Time To Fight Back by TONYE001(m): 10:01pm On Apr 13, 2022
emmanuelbrown26:

Mostly should be females. See, I hv volunteered with an NGO on domestic violence and child abuse for 10 solid months without pay, u did it to know marriage wahala and I know why I left them.
I hv worked with females and males. D issue is not about parents training their sons and daughters, sons heeds to d training more than daughters of eve.
Some daughters of eve deserves better beating before they would understand some certain things. I hv seen a lot in them

I wish you have a published source to back your assertion. The world is too big to arrive at a conclusion based on your experience. I have my own experiences and I'm sure others do. Only verifiable claims can be believed.

Someone out there has seen a lot of terrible males too. Someone out there has seen a drunkard for a husband, a cultist or a serial adulterer. Your experiences are not exclusive.

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Re: Domestic Violence: A Time To Fight Back by emmanuelbrown26: 10:10pm On Apr 13, 2022
TONYE001:


Which you have a published source to back your assertion. The world is too big to arrive at a conclusion based on your experience. I have my own experiences and I'm sure others do. Only verifiable claims can be believed.

Someone out there has seen a lot of terrible males too. Someone out there has seen a drunkard for a husband, a cultist or a serial adulterer. Your experiences are not exclusive.
U see this DV, this shit aren't going anytime soon, Infact it has come to stay. Back then, women were home builders, peacemakers, unity, but right now, they are home breakers and most of d disunity in homes are being caused by them.

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Re: Domestic Violence: A Time To Fight Back by TONYE001(m): 10:13pm On Apr 13, 2022
emmanuelbrown26:

U see this DV, this shit aren't going anytime soon, Infact it has come to stay. Back then, women were home builders, peacemakers, unity, but right now, they are home breakers and most of d disunity in homes are being caused by them.

I see you would not stop blaming women for DV.

No wahala.

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Re: Domestic Violence: A Time To Fight Back by emmanuelbrown26: 10:20pm On Apr 13, 2022
TONYE001:


I see you would not stop blaming women for DV.

No wahala.
D earlier women start telling themselves d truth d easier to eradicate DV but species of women we hv this days are not ready to hear d truth.
A man can not just wake up and lay his hands on a woman without d woman pushing d man to d wall, mind u not all men can be allowed to be pushed to d wall before fighting back. If a woman want peace she should bring d peace

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Re: Domestic Violence: A Time To Fight Back by ccffwx: 10:56pm On Apr 13, 2022
emmanuelbrown26:

Some daughters of eve deserves better beating

You will end up like Osinachi's husband. Coward!

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Re: Domestic Violence: A Time To Fight Back by TONYE001(m): 11:11pm On Apr 13, 2022
Lalasticlala, please let's take this to the Front Page for a broader view.
Re: Domestic Violence: A Time To Fight Back by ImaIma1(f): 1:10am On Apr 14, 2022
emmanuelbrown26:

D earlier women start telling themselves d truth d easier to eradicate DV but species of women we hv this days are not ready to hear d truth.
A man can not just wake up and lay his hands on a woman without d woman pushing d man to d wall, mind u not all men can be allowed to be pushed to d wall before fighting back. If a woman want peace she should bring d peace


From your comments men are saints, and are only pushed to the wall by women. They are completely blameless in all their dealings and can never be wrong. Any wrong in them is caused by the woman. So they have to beat the woman because they are pushed. Ok I see your point.

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Re: Domestic Violence: A Time To Fight Back by TONYE001(m): 7:10am On Apr 14, 2022
ImaIma1:


From your comments men are saints, and are only pushed to the wall by women. They are completely blameless in all their dealings and can never be wrong. Any wrong in them is caused by the woman. So they have to beat the woman because they are pushed. Ok I see your point.

I tried to make him see things differently but I couldn't.

Maybe he'd have a rethink sometime. I hope it won't be too late.

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Re: Domestic Violence: A Time To Fight Back by emmanuelbrown26: 7:13am On Apr 14, 2022
ImaIma1:


From your comments men are saints, and are only pushed to the wall by women. They are completely blameless in all their dealings and can never be wrong. Any wrong in them is caused by the woman. So they have to beat the woman because they are pushed. Ok I see your point.
When it comes to DV, women are simply d cause, that's d fact. I would hv narrated stories upon stories but I won't go their bcs this is not why we are here.
Yes I know some stupid men in boys skin that can't reason at all.
Yes I know some men that are not worthy to be called men at all.
Yes I know some idiotic men in boys skin that are not suppose to associate with human beings.
But domestic violence are being caused by women and d earlier women start knowing that they are d cause d better for them

4 Likes

Re: Domestic Violence: A Time To Fight Back by emmanuelbrown26: 7:16am On Apr 14, 2022
ccffwx:


You will end up like Osinachi's husband. Coward!
NIGERiANS ARE TOO EmOTIONAL, U GUYS HV NEvER ASKED SOME QUESTIONS THAT LED TO HER DEATH. LETS WSIT FOR D AUToPSY BEFORE HANGING D MAN.
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A FATHER TO INSTIGATE CHILDREN AGAiNST THEIR MOTHER OR D OTHER WAY ROUND?

1 Like

Re: Domestic Violence: A Time To Fight Back by JONNYSPUTE(m): 7:19am On Apr 14, 2022
.....The truth is that alot of family values has gone into extinction.

Until we start telling ourselves the truth,this issue of domestic violence will never end.

But whenever one tries to bring it up the next thing you will hear is that things have changed and I keep asking myself. If things have changed from the way it used to be,then why are we complaining?

So let all of us share in the blame until we go back to the root.

3 Likes

Re: Domestic Violence: A Time To Fight Back by emmanuelbrown26: 7:21am On Apr 14, 2022
TONYE001:


I tried to make him see things differently but I couldn't.

Maybe he'd have a rethink sometime. I hope it won't be too late.
Morning brotherly, I expected questions regards to d death of that lady but to my utmost surprise, nobody is asking those questions.
People are after hanging d man without seen d result. When we attach so much emotion to things that's when we will forget to ask d necessary questions,

3 Likes 1 Share

Re: Domestic Violence: A Time To Fight Back by JONNYSPUTE(m): 7:27am On Apr 14, 2022
emmanuelbrown26:

When it comes to DV, women are simply d cause, that's d fact. I would hv narrated stories upon stories but I won't go their bcs this is not why we are here.
Yes I know some stupid men in boys skin that can't reason at all.
Yes I know some men that are not worthy to be called men at all.
Yes I know some idiotic men in boys skin that are not suppose to associate with human beings.
But domestic violence are being caused by women and d earlier women start knowing that they are d cause d better for them
.....The truth is bitter but it is the only thing that can save us all from this issue.

Let's keep covering it and see how it goes.

Obident is better than sacrifice. What do we have now?

When a husband loves,people call him a simp.
When a woman obeys or submit,people calls her a slave.

Until we return to the root and revive the family values nothing will change. Hehehe

10 Likes 1 Share

Re: Domestic Violence: A Time To Fight Back by emmanuelbrown26: 7:47am On Apr 14, 2022
JONNYSPUTE:
.....The truth is bitter but it is the only thing that can save us all from this issue.

Let's keep covering it and see how it goes.

Obident is better than sacrifice. What do we have now? Woke people call it slavery and still want things to remain normal.
U nailed it, truth is bitter, we all want to eat d cake and still hv it, which is not done anywhere.
Something happened at a pharmacy that I worked with sometime ago.
D pharmacy normally closes by 9 but doors are being locked by 8:45, for d attendants to tidy up d days activities.
They employed a new pharmacists (though without much experience), so when d pharmacist wanted to go which is normal thing all over for pharmacist to leave before d whole attendants.
Could u believe d silent insult from one of d sales attendant. "that pharmacist can't leave until they reconciled their excess money, that he was d one that delayed them" d pharmacist asked politely that (bcs he was one cool and gentle guy) he was never d one that delayed them, they didn't wanted to open d door for d poor pharmacist to go.
Immediately I got hold of what happened, I opened d door and locked all of them inside and stayed outside. It was when they finished that they didn't see key, they called and pleaded that I should unlock for them to go. Why they pleaded they knew that my head no too correct for women matter.
So in this scenario, let's assume d pharmacist was the husband d sales attendant was d wife, what would u do in such situation?
Mind u, a Pharmacist on duty is d head of that pharmacy

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