I see my husband more like a brother than a lover. We laugh, crack jokes and hold similar world views. BUT theres no sexual chemistry. I find it difficult to get aroused by him. There is a deep sense of unfulfillment and unhappiness.
I wonder how long I can cope with a marriage without passion.

How did you get into such union in the first place? To escape poverty? To be at par with your mates? To smite an ex?

Marriage has always been for the wrong reasons since Adam. No marriage has ever been successful; except those governed by religion and stone age cultures and tradition.

You have a problem...

oglalasioux:
How did you get into such union in the first place? To escape poverty? To be at par with your mates? To smite an ex?

Marriage has always been for the wrong reasons since Adam. No marriage has ever been successful; except those governed by religion and stone age cultures and tradition.

We mistook our fondness for each other to mean love

Which kain wahala be this?? How long have you been together? Any child yet?


cc: sweetmelanin

YES PLEASE!!!

When happiness is subtracted from marriage, it becomes dungeon, slavery, hell etc.

I believe you guys can work it out. I wouldn't wanna start conspiracy theories here but with the right intent, you guys can pull the string together and fire the catapult.


cc: Hanseel1 beebeeooh

sweetmelanin:
I see my husband more like a brother than a lover. We laugh, crack jokes and hold similar world views. BUT theres no sexual chemistry. I find it difficult to get aroused by him. There is a deep sense of unfulfillment and unhappiness.
I wonder how long I can cope with a marriage without passion.

Do whatever suits you. You have the consequences to face so think twice.

Yes ma!

For some, divorce is necessary. But, for most, it should only be considered when all other options have been explored and exhausted. Have you done the work?

Just know that like many things, divorce has a beginning, middle and end. Know that although divorce entails pain and grief, it often eases up over time.

Understand that a divorce can leave casualties behind. You need to make sure that your kids are okay because divorce can undermine their sense of stability and security. You also need to allow yourself to mourn appropriately, because you too have lost something precious.

dingbang:
You have a problem...

Won fe ni problem---- Reminisce...


She'd appreciate this kinda love by 40+ years of age.





Anyway my eyes are fixed on Dominique

think twice before u make any decision. the decision u make today will either take u high or take u down. be wise.

Awwww

Poor guy....he is obviously more in love with you.

Like someone asked...do you guys have any kids?

The love is there, you're just tired of exercising it. Once in life, we all get through the puppy love stage. Once that stage is over we start to feel dry and awkward about whoever we love. Look at it from the sex angle, when men and women are both in that state of sexual stimulation they are sure they want each other they clearly have a bond. But when they both reach climax, that's it, they look at themselves less intensely. Since the reason for the action as been reached. Now after you reach climax, would you say you hate sex? most definitely not. It's similar to your reaction to love. Everything must be exercised. That's the reason behind the vows. And it tells you love is more of brains than heart. Love requires discipline also. Because if we are to depend on how we feel most times, Heck! The whole world would be a dicking free world. Go back to your husband madam and shana si love yen! .

Divorce immediately.....let him be a brother to you shikena

And bringing your family privacy on social media will make you happy rather than discussing it with him? Smh

OP please how old are you ?
And do you have a mother ? Have you discussed this with her and what did she say ?

Personally I feel sorry for your husband. Our mothers went through hell to keep their homes. Some even endured domestic violence and you want to walk out of a marriage because you are suffering from a mood swing ?

May this kind of woman never cross my path lord ......

Absolutely!


Why should anyone continue to indulge in what makes them unhappy.

Marriage and love is not by force.
Nothing! Nothing! Nothing should make anyone stay in an unhappy marriage.

The dude on the other thread who said he wasn't getting married is justified after all. People like the op have succeeded in making a once great institution a joke.

Yeah, marriage has probably outlived its relevance.

See question , what else should be a good reason for divorce....?...okay stay in the marriage and be unhappy all your life , I don't eat to know then kind thing you dry endure, but youre entitled to be happy !!!.....



I DIDN'T READ THE STORY THOUGH BUT THE HEADLINE NO GOOD

It's a damn good reason


In this life.... We have only one assignment

That's the pursuit of happiness

Yes, I think oyinbo people call it irreconcilable differences

Did you see him more like a brother before marrying him?

Na you dey control the guy. You done come dey see am as your junior brother wey you no suppose dey fvck. Poor guy. If we tell them say make dem dey apply sense for woman, say they are confused souls. Dem go say we are broke guys. He done happen now. My sincere sympathy to the guy for his precious time that has been wasted.

Cheap quality phones? Check my signature.

So op you couldn't differentiate between love and fondness at your age and you felt u were ready for marriage. Smh you were only ready for wedding, not marriage.

sweetmelanin:



We mistook our fondness for each other to mean love

What exactly are you looking for? You said you and your husband communicate well and you are not turned up sexually towards him, so what turns you on. Is there a problem for you to initiate sex because from what you've said so far, it's like he initiates and you turn down most times. As long as you are in that marriage with no assault towards each other then your responsibility is to make every other thing work. Not even an advice can do that for you, all you need to do is do the right thing towards what you need in the right way.

Your emotion was created for you and not you for your emotion, so if you can't control your emotions, then you are immature for any type of intimate relationship