Hi, my name is Jerry, I am 30yrs old, suffering from osteoarthritis, depression and having suicidal thoughts.

My problem started from my teenage years. I am very shy and have poor social skills or so I thought. Think I was in ss1/ss2 in a mixed school(had spend my jss years in an all boys school).
My life growing up had been devoid of parental or sibling love and I wanted to experience something close especially with the juicy stories and escapades from friends. Peer pressure things.

I wanted to belong so bad that I tried too but was not successful. This rejection was the beginning of what I am suffering now.
I made a wrong decision which changed my life and turned me into a miserable pile of sack. One afternoon after my bath, I was admiring myself in the mirror and making faces and suddenly I realized that whenever I raise eyebrows and pout my lips, I looked more handsome.
Nairalanders, that was how I started keeping my face 24hrs, 7days a week for good 8yrs(2003-2008).

I started getting stares which I wanted and translated to admiration not knowing those were stares of "what is this clown doing ".
When I decided to stop and finally close my jaw properly, I realised that my jaw was not well aligned, felt discomfort and slight pain.
Started visiting dental clinics, no improvement still and that was how depression crept into my life. People around weren't helping issues at all cause hardly will I be able to have a face to face conversation with them but I observed that they were cool with looking directly from the side of my face. I couldn't bond with neither family nor friends.

It was a sad moment, skipping lectures so as to visit dentist, smoking weed so as kill the depression (another regret).
Am tall so I easily fell in love with basketball.
Around 2010, I meet an uncle of mine who listened to all my worrys and his words to me inspired me to follow my own path with every shred of courage,self determination and passion.
I decided I was going to follow some of my basketball buddies into the police force as a athlete officer(under sports) while continuing my education part time. I resumed training. Morning till night, I was at the basketball court training,

Out of nowhere, the pain and jaw discomfort came back and a doctor I visited told me about a tmj procedure to realign my bite(teeth)and I goggled about this procedure and how it's done. I saw it involved massage therapy and brace wire, so I foolishly went to a local masseuse who told me he knew how to get it right.
That's was how another bad decision further destroyed the jaw I was managing. This guy used aboniki to massage from my spine bone, to the jaw lines that runs underneath my ear, separating my neck from my head.
My neck was not spared.
I only stopped the sessions after I discovered that I was like a walking corpse. Couldn't walk 5km without urinating and drinking pure water, was easily fatigued, speech incoherent.

Its been 5years since this happened but ever since that day, my life has been hell. It was so shameful that I couldn't go out for a while but when I started going out, I returned to basketball practice. It helped seeing old friends and teammates but my body wasn't up to the physicality of an athlete. It was one day training, swollen knee, inflamed ear, jaw. Visited a doctor, did X-ray and it was discovered I had osteoarthritis.

I can't work cause my health is poor. Went back to school and studied tourism.
Whenever this pains starts, I just think of the way forward but I always fall short of any tangible.

I need help, medical help, advice and counsel and possibly a permanent solution cause I can't live like this. Emotional, am drained
I want to build a life like I always dreamed of.

Pics

More pics

Finally pics I took yesterday

Am hungry first
well I don't know what to tell u, Iam not a doctor
OK in fact visit a herbalist

Homeboiy:
Am hungry first

well I don't know what to tell u, Iam not a doctor

OK in fact visit a herbalist

Lol. Thanks
Which mod moderates this section.
Wanna move it to health

mannatech:
Lol. Thanks Which mod moderates this section. Wanna move it to health

call on the super MOD la-la...

Your jaw looks perfectly fine to me. Make sure you go to LUTH if you are in Lagos, or the Teaching hospital where ever you live. Go and look for a doctor that can look into your case. Also seek help of a psychiatrist to help prescribe medication for your depression or mental illness. Your jaw is perfectly aligned my friend and you are even handsome.

CC. Lalasticlala
Please help move this to the health section and possibly front page

Help a confused and lost brother

baby124:
Your jaw looks perfectly fine to me. Make sure you go to LUTH if you are in Lagos, or the Teaching hospital where ever you live. Go and look for a doctor that can look into your case. Also seek help of a psychiatrist to help prescribe medication for your depression or mental illness. Your jaw is perfectly aligned my friend and you are even handsome.

OK. Done all these but will still do

mannatech:
CC. Lalasticlala
Please help move this to the health section and possibly front page

Help a confused and lost brother

You look okay on first impression. I'm yet to physically see the need why you submitted your entire being to that wire and aboniki merchant.

You may need good money to afford a certified specialist to handle this issue. But, if the funds aint available, You may have to accept, Embrace and look for alternatives to manage this challenge and live a productive life. It begins with developing a very strong mental state.

Never stop dreaming bro. I'm rooting for you

All you need is self esteem , I once wanted to belong but I discovered its pure rubbish , humans love to be what they are not . Peer pressure is normal but overcoming it in conservative societies like ours is quite difficult. For me you are a handsome dude .

Don't give into depression, its worse than poverty , don't let the social media deceive you , you can be whatever you want . Just do things that will make you happy and not what make others happy

Fundamentalist:
All you need is self esteem , I once wanted to belong but I discovered its pure rubbish , humans love to be what they are not . Peer pressure is normal but overcoming it in conservative societies like ours is quite difficult. For me you are a handsome dude .

Don't give into depression, its worse than poverty , don't let the social media deceive you , you can be whatever you want . Just do things that will make you happy and not what make others happy

Chubhie:

You look okay on first impression. I'm yet to physically see the need why you submitted your entire being to that wire and aboniki merchant.

You may need good money to afford a certified specialist to handle this issue. But, if the funds aint available, You may have to accept, Embrace and look for alternatives to manage this challenge and live a productive life. It begins with developing a very strong mental state.

Never stop dreaming bro. I'm rooting for you

Thanks. This is inspiring

My guy, i see nothing wrong. Your face and jaw looks perfectly okay.

Sometimes it’s all just in our head and not what you feel people think. Stop looking for validation from people. They also have their own problems and never for once think people will put you first.

Because someone looked at you and frowned might be because you looking at the person’s face for some sort of reaction makes them uncomfortable, hence the frown.

Get you a woman that is caring so you can have someone to talk to, someone you can confide in, someone that seems like the world doesn’t matter anymore when you both are together.

Fight the depression, you’re a man. Show your strength and rise above your worries, there’s a lot to do in life than to be nursing depression.

Peace!

Sorry