StrongandMighty:

How please.. I need to know how I'm d problem

You are too emotionally vulnerable to be in a relationship. It's one thing to grow in stature, age, academics, finance etc, it is another thing to Grow emotionally. If a lady or anyone can get you to lose your sleep, mind and happiness then it shows though you are emotionally sensitive, you are not emotionally intelligent.

Emotional intelligence is the capacity to control your emotions. The ability to interact/ react to people in a refined and composed manner irrespective of how tenuous the situation may be. The ability to control your thoughts. I think you need to master that.

I'd suggest you talk to your lady, let her see your problem and request for a break. Believe me you can't solve your problem when you are in it. A clear break is required here. Focus and work on yourself and be a better person. 23 is the age to grow not the time to add burden of another. Relationship itself is draining.

Bruh I need 2 get my old self back.. I was so happy and full of life when this girl wasn't there.. But see me now.. Am drowning

try wat I told u to do first.. let's see aw it works before d week runs out....and if doesn't we will find another way for u ...just ask her later today....and clear urself...u will see u will sleep well and u might gain her trust back

Young and dumb. You’ll get over it.

StrongandMighty:

Am 23

MariaLavina:
You are too emotionally vulnerable to be in a relationship. It's one thing to grow in stature, age, academics, finance etc, it is another thing to Grow emotionally. If a lady or anyone can get you to lose your sleep, mind and happiness then it shows though you are emotionally sensitive, you are not emotionally intelligent.

Emotional intelligence is the capacity to control your emotions. The ability to interact/ react to people in a refined and composed manner irrespective of how tenuous the situation may be. The ability to control your thoughts. I think you need to master that.

I'd suggest you talk to your lady, let her see your problem and request for a break. Believe me you can't solve your problem when you are in it. A clear break is required here. Focus and work on yourself and be a better person. 23 is the age to grow not the time to add burden of another. Relationship itself is draining.

[s]God! Thank you so so much for this! That emotional intelligence is wat got me nd it explained my situation.. Do you of a place where I can read abt it more nd secondly my greatest fear is hrt break nd now u told me to ask her for a brk.. Please how will I go abt it?[/s]

StrongandMighty:

How please.. I need to know how0 I'm d problem

I think you have got limerence. It is obsessive romantic thoughts. You are not in love. You merely have what is called OCD which causes compulsive thoughts about what you care about the most. It happens to me too.
Try to distract yourself or if it is unbearable you can go see a doctor and get anti-depressants or anti-anxiety medications.
Welcome to the club bro!!!!!

Saff:
Young and dumb. You’ll get over it.

I might agree with you that am young bt I'm not dump.. I was so caught up in situation.. If getting over it is dat easy why haven't I gotten over it despite all my efforts

StrongandMighty:

Honestly it's not working

bia nwoke m,why are u stressing her nah? she has already given u tangible advice and tips on how to go about this,and you aint getting it. A girl you aint married to,stole your heart,mind,sanity and focus and you still dont wanna retrieve them with the numerous tips dished out here. if you are this insecure now,what will happen if u eventually get married to her. You are afraid of conducting an fbi investigation because,u are afraid of your greatest fear.u get luck say men like biafrabushboy,donstan18,lefulefu,delugajackson,mimimile93 no dey,dem for give u beta uppercut Dey there make pant dey wear u,yabaleft dey lack patients sha.

Maduawuchukwu:


I think you have got limerence. It is obsessive romantic thoughts. You are not in love. You merely have what is called OCD which causes compulsive thoughts about what you care about the most. It happens to me too.
Try to distract yourself or if it is unbearable you can go see a doctor and get anti-depressants or anti-anxiety medications.
Welcome to the club bro!!!!!

This is my first time of hearing this... And with the way it sounds it looks like I've gotten myself in a deep mess

MichaelBukamzy:
bia nwoke m,why are u stressing her nah? she has already given u tangible advice and tips on how to go about this,and you aint getting it. A girl you aint married to,stole your heart,mind,sanity and focus and you still dont wanna retrieve them with the numerous tips dished out here. if you are this insecure now,what will happen if u eventually get married to her. You are afraid of conducting an fbi investigation because,u are afraid of your greatest fear.u get luck say men like biafrabushboy,donstan18,lefulefu,delugajackson,mimimile93 no dey,dem for give u beta uppercut Dey there make pant dey wear u,yabaleft dey lack patients sha.

Am not afraid of conducting any investigation just that I don't know how to go abt it.. It's not as easy as it seems

Saff:
4am you’re typing this? This is serious, love has really finished you.

And they said love is a beautiful thing o.

Manpoly:

Bruh I need 2 get my old self back.. I was so happy and full of life when this girl wasn't there.. But see me now.. Am drowning

try wat I told u to do first.. let's see aw it works before d week runs out....and if doesn't we will find another way for u ...just ask her later today....and clear urself...u will see u will sleep well and u might gain her trust back

OK bro.. I'll keep in touch with you
I hope it works bcuz ur boy is drowning in diz pool called love

StrongandMighty:

This is my first time of hearing this... And with the way it sounds it looks like I've gotten myself in a deep mess

Nope u are not in deep poo. The traits were in you. Something just brought it out. Try to ignore it but if you can't then pay a visit to the doctor. It is nothing.

SlayQueenSlayer:


And they said love is a beautiful thing o.

Yes it is... Wen u get bk d amount of energy you give out.. Wen it's been reciprocated in equal proportion

Bro I can see a lot of nice response here, but let me put it this way what of if she is not having this kind of tought also ,you just dey suffer yourself for nothing if she is urs she is.if she is not she will surely go so why stress yourself over nothing. Bro most of us don pass break ups but we moved on. Pls take it easy

StrongandMighty:

God! Thank you so so much for this! That emotional intelligence is wat got me nd it explained my situation.. Do you of a place where I can read abt it more nd secondly my greatest fear is hrt break nd now u told me to ask her for a brk.. Please how will I go abt it?

Search Google, read articles and books on it. Be careful to filter what you read though, don't end up reading books on red pills and bad boy stuff. Those won't help, be wise enough to read articles that will make you a better person in life not a bad boy of the moment.


You have to make a choice, a burdened heart or a free heart? As for the lady, speak to her. Tell her what's going on, involve her. She may be of better help and break up may be evitable. But you need some space.

StrongandMighty:

Am not afraid of conducting any investigation just that I don't know how to go abt it.. It's not as easy as it seems

oga,reduce her importance to your life.reduce your texts,calls and occupy your mind with more important issues. always dey with ur guys. they will help u talk more on premier league,hustling,identifying bitches,betting.highness and many more meaningfull arguements. guy man up nah,stop being a pussy.

..

A wise man once said "if you have not found satisfaction in the Love of God, you cannot find it in a partner". If you're a believer you need to envelop your mind n thoughts more on the things of God to know him better. You're feeling what u feel because there's a vacuum and it's telling u a lie that u need someone. What u need is to love yourself and Love God, then you can be at ease and peace. . You're living a life of illusion, it's high time u broke free and be disillusioned.

OP you have to guard your heart with all diligence. Take a break and keep your mind busy with things that can add more value to YOURSELF. You don't know your worth that's why you are dieing to the fear of REJECTION.

Ghnaija:
Bro I can see a lot of nice response here, but let me put it this way what of if she is not having this kind of tought also ,you just dey suffer yourself for nothing if she is urs she is.if she is not she will surely go so why stress yourself over nothing. Bro most of us don pass break ups but we moved on. Pls take it easy

So in ur opinion I should stop worrying.. What will be will be

MichaelBukamzy:
oga,reduce her importance to your life.reduce your texts,calls and occupy your mind with more important issues. always dey with ur guys. they will help u talk more on premier league,hustling,identifying bitches,betting.highness and many more meaningfull arguements. guy man up nah,stop being a pussy.

Thanks bruh.. I wasn't like this B4.. Am even surprised at what am doing ryt now.. I wonder how I got to this point

KingErnesto:
A wise man once said "if you have not found satisfaction in the Love of God, you cannot find it in a partner". If you're a believer you need to envelop your mind n thoughts more on the things of God to know him better. You're feeling what u feel because there's a vacuum and it's telling u a lie. You're living a life of illusion, it's high time u break free and be disillusioned.

OP you have to guard your heart with all diligence. Take a break and keep your mind busy with things that can add more value to YOURSELF. You don't know your worth that's why you are dieing to the fear of REJECTION. You're a shame. spits.

A nyc write up without a good ending.. Tnkz doh

StrongandMighty:

A nyc write up without a good ending.. Tnkz doh

Forgive me. But you need to know your worth and add more value to urself.

KingErnesto:
A wise man once said "if you have not found satisfaction in the Love of God, you cannot find it in a partner". If you're a believer you need to envelop your mind n thoughts more on the things of God to know him better. You're feeling what u feel because there's a vacuum and it's telling u a lie that u need someone. What u need is to love yourself and Love God, then you can be at ease and peace. . You're living a life of illusion, it's high time u broke free and be disillusioned.

OP you have to guard your heart with all diligence. Take a break and keep your mind busy with things that can add more value to YOURSELF. You don't know your worth that's why you are dieing to the fear of REJECTION. It's a shame. spits.

You don't have to spit.

You almost ruined a beautiful message because of that

If you have fear of dying you will be disturbed by thoughts that you are gonna die.
If you have fear of being cheated on you will be disturbed by thoughts that you are being cheated on.
Anything you fear will disturb you.
The solution is to stop looking for certainty. Stop asking questions and go with the flow.

MariaLavina:
Search Google, read articles and books on it. Be careful to filter what you read though, don't end up reading books on red pills and bad boy stuff. Those won't help, be wise enough to read articles that will make you a better person in life not a bad boy of the moment.


You have to make a choice, a burdened heart or a free heart? As for the lady, speak to her. Tell her what's going on, involve her. She may be of better help and break up may be evitable. But you need some space.

Thanks so much ... I never knew I'll be doing diz
Am not a bad boy nd I'll nva be.. I spent 5yrs in university without being one so it certainly won't strt now..
I will talk to her about it

KingErnesto:


Forgive me. But you need to know your worth and add more value to urself.

That's so true.. I think low self esteem is part of my problem

StrongandMighty:

Thanks so much ... I never knew I'll be doing diz
Am not a bad boy nd I'll nva be.. I spent 5yrs in university without being one so it certainly won't strt now..
I will talk to her about it

You are welcome.

Please do, You will be fine.

Maduawuchukwu:
If you have fear of dying you will be disturbed by thoughts that you are gonna die.
If you have fear of being cheated on you will be disturbed by thoughts that you are being cheated on.
Anything you fear will disturb you.
The solution is to stop looking for certainty. Stop asking questions and go with the flow.

I understand ur point... You should also understand that it hasn't been easy for me dats why I brought it here

Maduawuchukwu:


Nope u are not in deep poo. The traits were in you. Something just brought it out. Try to ignore it but if you can't then pay a visit to the doctor. It is nothing.

OK thanks.. I'll try my best to ignore it

StrongandMighty:

Thanks bruh.. I wasn't like this B4.. Am even surprised at what am doing ryt now.. I wonder how I got to this point

guy,you are a man.you got the key,use your brain. all those girls advising you to let her know that she is your heart beat(as u made us know)if she finds out that you are drowning like you said,and you really need her to survive,samson and delilah will be your case. besides,at your early twenty when you are not ready for courtship,you are dating a girl that is still blossoming without a plan B? YOUR MIND DEY TELL YOU SAY NA ONLY YOU SHE GET?hahahaha,get ready for the shocker. am your age mate,and just like many other guys of our age,we don pass this level.

MariaLavina:
You don't have to spit.

You almost ruined a beautiful message because of that

I overreacted. I've been there. The feeling of just being depressed, insecured over people is not just worth it.
Look at the time he spent to articulate his feelings. As at that hour the lady was probably even sleeping. I think he should channel that energy into self development and values.