Quality20:
Just make sure all those American porn like men have not conditioned her to weird n evil sexual cravings. Except if you can flow with her demands

that's how you guys would want a virgin who is also good in bed like a slut

Teespice:
I have one question for you

Have you tried as in made any attempt to get to know this person before bringing this matter for people to deliberate on?

if you haven't, SMH for you.

I have tried, want to get unbiased views, before going further

WhyAWhy:
You have an interesting story and I will table a few action plans for you.

1. Take a trip to USA or let her come down to Nigeria for a short trip - You will understand each other's mannerisms and perspective to life better with a short trip.

2. You are both in the age where everyone believes you should be married or popping out babies so there is a tendency for people to link you up so that your sole focus is planning a life together- DO NOT fall for this. You have to get to know each other without the bias of settling together (tough call).

3. Does she have a student loan and how much? This is the kind of financial burden you may have to bear.

4. Who else knows her apart from the people that introduced her. What are her facebook posts/Instagram/Twitter/Whatsapp stories and shares like. You can easily build up a profile based on this.

5. Where do you guys plan to settle if this pans out well. It is incredibly hard to just "move from Nigeria" and start practising medicine in the USA. I have several Nigerians as family friends who have not been able to get into the Medical System in USA after finishing Medicine in OAU and postgrad in USA. You have tons of difficult exams to write and a very competitive application process that puts people who schooled abroad ahead of you. It is still easier to get into the UK system by writing IELTS, Plab1 and Plab2 in that order.

Like several people have said, you are both coming from different backgrounds and have probably imbibed different idealogies and perspective about life. Marrying across the pond is a very big gamble irrespective of race. You therefore have to carry out a lot of due diligence. Marriage itself is a gamble but there are so many obvious things you can iron out before you decide on settling with a partner

I wish you all the best bro.

Duely noted. Thank you.

LordKO:
An environment doesn't inherently change someone's ethical leanings. I wager more than 99.5% the people who've given you advice are either subjects of their host countries or haven't crossed the shores of Nigeria. Know thyself and make sure you're going into equity with clean hands - if real marriage is your target with her - then hack her mind and know her true character. If her ethical leanings align towards conscientiousness, marry her, provided that you're ready to stay conscientious.

Don't base your interest in her on material things or what you intend to gain from her; rather, base it on your continual ability to cheerfully maintain and sustain her core interest in you, because that's the surest to have a wife who'll move mountains for you.

Meanwhile, discard her if you observe any trace of self-absorption in her, even if she doesn't mete out such against you at the moment, because she'll definitely do in the near future, unless you derive pleasure in servility. Don't mortgage your liberty because of paper, because you can easily get one at a cheaper rate with your liberty intact.

Thank you so much. One of the best.

thebosstrevor1:
Advantage

You might end up getting citizenship
She Will be the mother of your kids
She might be very feminine if she has not been brainwashed by feminist ideologies and gender studies.
She will support and help you if she understands her role
She will be educated and might have a well balanced world view.

Disadvantage

She might Be a Feminist
She might emasculate you, if you dont earn well
She might end up driving you out of the home if you guys have trouble.
You might become homeless
Cultural shock of what relationships and marriage is supposed to be like

A good woman will be a good woman no matter the area.

thebosstrevor1:
Advantage

You might end up getting citizenship
She Will be the mother of your kids
She might be very feminine if she has not been brainwashed by feminist ideologies and gender studies.
She will support and help you if she understands her role
She will be educated and might have a well balanced world view.

Disadvantage

She might Be a Feminist
She might emasculate you, if you dont earn well
She might end up driving you out of the home if you guys have trouble.
You might become homeless
Cultural shock of what relationships and marriage is supposed to be like

A good woman will be a good woman no matter the area.

thebosstrevor1:
Advantage

You might end up getting citizenship
She Will be the mother of your kids
She might be very feminine if she has not been brainwashed by feminist ideologies and gender studies.
She will support and help you if she understands her role
She will be educated and might have a well balanced world view.

Disadvantage

She might Be a Feminist
She might emasculate you, if you dont earn well
She might end up driving you out of the home if you guys have trouble.
You might become homeless
Cultural shock of what relationships and marriage is supposed to be like

A good woman will be a good woman no matter the area.

that part of " good woman will always be good woman".. made me remember, the late R&B icon , Whitney Houston, despite the trauma she went in the hands of her husband, and looking at the power the women have over there, she refused to do otherwise, just cos of the love

sammieddi:
She isn't a Nigerian, She is an American, so change that Mentality/ perspective you got. So that you don't start unconsciously comparing her with Girls here in Nigeria. My two cents.

She's both tho. That's why we call them Nigerian-Americans. In others, people in her category are Nigerians who were born and raised in the US. Put differently, they are Americans of Nigerian heritage but most people here in the US see them as Nigerians.

You have to be down to earth and truly humble for it to work and ready to take shit half of the time.

No matter how advanced you are in Nigeria, you will have a lot of catching up to do, when you land in the USA, whereas she have been around the block many times over....and while you catches up, she is also up-ing hers, so the incompatibility is going to be there for sometime and it will sometime result in friction between both of you, that is where your down to earth and humility will come to play a big role and your ability to ‘take shit’

I have seen these type of marriages working for some people, but it is not for the average 9ja guy with Nigeria mentality of the man ‘being the head’ or for the alpha-male 9ja guy.

But, never say never you can take the plunge and see what comes out of it....after all, despite all the over abundance of caution and prayers before marriage in our society today, 50% still end up on the divorce line, while more than half of the other 50% are merely enduring a horrible marriage experience.

Count yourself lucky bro... you have a good hearted cousin. This is a great opportunity for you... it's more better than Nigeria trained you would probably find in Nigeria if her both parents are Nigerians and she was taught the African values that we Africans are known for. Congratulations... please, introduce me to her sisters and God bless.

Trumptweet:
Please help me. I am in medical school. My cousin and his wife (both living in USA) introduced a girl to me. They want me to come over.

From my understanding the two families are friends.

According to my cousin, "she is a good girl from a good family "

I have already started chatting with her, she seems cool, apparently.

But I need unbiased views from those with experience please.

Put yourself in my position and advise me.

she's 27. She is doing her masters .im 29, finishing next yr.


Thank you.

Your life will become miserable like that old harlot of a witch called Beautyaddy looking for small boy to control

There are significant cultural differences. A Nigerian-American is an American and being an American means the following:

1) Independent-minded
2) Selfish
3) Pleasure-seeking (they cannot take much pain)
4) Friendly and Open to Experiences
5) Comfort-Loving
6) Not long-term oriented.
7) Feminist-minded

You will have to live with these fundamental realities and be extremely patient with the woman in question. The attraction should be there other than just an opportunity for you to migrate to the US and in her case for her to marry a Nigerian.

Don’t come here and end up like the Ghanaian pastor who murdered the wife.The views a lot of you guys have about America are totally different from the reality.You have to actually like here to understand..It will push you to your limit the first few years but remember, don’t kill or damage somebody’s daughter no matter what you see

MzMercie:


Kindly read his question and my comment again slowly. Make sure you use your brain while reading, thanks.

You called him an opportunist hence I called out your foolishness.

So can you now go back and read the OP’s post but this time slowly since you are not rushing to make front page. Make sure you use that thing in your head called a brain while reading. Thanks.

cococandy:

Some comments tend to dim the sunlight. You’re absolutely right

So you still dey nl

Trumptweet:
I have tried, want to get unbiased views, before going further

it is good that you have tried.
What do you think of the opinions you have gotten here so far?

Teespice:


it is good that you have tried.

What do you think of the opinions you have gotten here so far?

Wonderful. The aim of the post was achieved. My mindset is now broad and we'll enlightened. Some things I wasnt considering before has been made bare. Hopefully, I won't err.

Trumptweet:

Wonderful. The aim of the post was achieved. My mindset is now broad and we'll enlightened. Some things I wasnt considering before has been made bare. Hopefully, I won't err.

Nice to hear.

please still make more effort to know this person before making a decision. at the end of the day, you are one who would date her and not nairalanders.

cheers.

Gimme her number lemme confirm something from her.

Crownstar01:
Haha. Have you ever travelled out of Nigeria before?

I was in Yankee in January 2020 (Los Angeles, California) to be precise.
Check and verify your fantasies before you end up in Yankee only to find yourself stuck at the very bottom of that society.

KenModi:


You called him an opportunist hence I called out your foolishness.

So can you now go back and read the OP’s post but this time slowly since you are not rushing to make front page. Make sure you use that thing in your head called a brain while reading. Thanks.

Do what you said, you need it

thebosstrevor1:
Advantage

You might end up getting citizenship
She Will be the mother of your kids
She might be very feminine if she has not been brainwashed by feminist ideologies and gender studies.
She will support and help you if she understands her role
She will be educated and might have a well balanced world view.

Disadvantage

She might Be a Feminist
She might emasculate you, if you dont earn well
She might end up driving you out of the home if you guys have trouble.
You might become homeless
Cultural shock of what relationships and marriage is supposed to be like

A good woman will be a good woman no matter the area.

Interesting

gaius01:
Arrrrrrrh


First, how old are you ?
You are still in Medical school?
If you are too wife her, wife her in Nigeria not abroad cause. If not any small chaos Na police, you are vulnerable bro and you know she's OK, in the sense she's well to do so marrying her is not like a favour just that she need children and companion. Also know female are favour in court case outside.

I will advise you'd wife her here in Nigeria since she's a Nigerian.

Lol looks like you're talking from experience