₦airaland Forum

Ka, appreciation is not the issue here. This case is worse than what you think.

Tayotina mentioned that "he doesn't even want to know whether she is busy or not." It has reached a stage where he's demanding to be fed, even when it's not convenient for her.

Yes, if someone offers you a meal out of her own free will you still need to be appreciative. But here is a guy who is demanding to be fed and they are not even married or living together!

I do not want to use the word 'irresponsible', but this boyfriend is costing her time and money. He is simply taking advantage of her.

I'd like to have 2 - a girl and a boy.

If the first two are boys, then I'll try for a girl the third time.

If we still feel hungry for children after the first three, then maybe adoption will be considered ...

Legry, they are not married and they don't live together. And he's demanding food.

Yes. And besides you should have provided the info in the first post.

Our Finance Minister, Dr Ngozi Okonjo-Iweala? What's the problem between the senators, Dr. Okonjo-Iweala and the FCT minister? I haven't heard anything. Please tell us more.

tayotina: I'm not saying he doesn't love her ...

As far as I am concerned, this is 'rubbish love'(ìranù).

Most women, I think, have an extreme weakness for words (just as we men have a weakness for beauty). I want to advice the ladies on this forum. If you want to know if a man loves you, listen to his actions. Here is someone who is already taking advantage of your home training before marriage, and you are insisting that he loves you ...

Women.

demmy: clean environment could breed new form of mosquitoes less dangerous to health.

Seriously?

Or it is just a joke?

Mamba, the course of action you have described above ("starving her of sex" is tantamount to self-punishment. The person you are starving of sex would be yourself, because I am quite sure that there there is no girl in this continent who loves sex as much as you do!

@ Delarontus, I'm not so sure that a kid of nine today is smarter than a kid of nine ten years ago. Are you saying that since the time of the bible people have been getting smarter and smarter and smarter and smarter and ...

No, I don't think so. What makes you think so? What mistakes did our ancestors make?

Abeokuta, Ijebu-Ode, Ijebu-igbo, Sango Ota, Lagos, Kaduna, Benin, Ilorin, Ilesha, Ibadan, Ewekoro, ... and I currently live in Ogun State, too

That picture was taken when she was much younger. I believe it has been photo-enhanced. Let us see Omotola in a more realistic picture:
[center]https://www.omotola.com/bigimages/f5.jpg
Omotola, I mean no disrespect, but I'm doing this for Rita![/center]

Rita Dominic for president! http://www.ritadominic.com

I guess I'm going to think of a special gift for the first 1000 members. Something special, which they can't get anywhere else. But you know what would really excite me? 12,000 members.

Hehe. You ladies are yet to show any evidence that Omotola Jolade is more beautiful. Afterall, I have posted a picture of Rita up there showing you how beautiful she is. Can someone produce a picture of Omotola that is more beautiful than the picture of Rita Dominic that I've posted above?

Yes, she looks cool, but does she sound cool?

Frankly speaking, Genevieve Nnaji's album is probably as a result of the Nigerian movie marketers' ban on herself and the other highly paid actors. If Genevieve had been busy acting in Nollywood and getting paid handsomely, she would not have had time to record this album.

Wow. this is the first time someone is volunteering to be a moderator. I'm pleased B-)

I don't mean any disrespect towards honorable Mrs. Jolade, but as a single [color=#003DF5]young man[/color] I think I am qualified to tell you [color=#B800F5]ladies[/color] that Rita Dominic is definitely more beautiful!
[center]https://www.nairaland.com/img/rita.jpg
Rita Dominic - Isn't she an angel? [/center]
Can Omotola Jolade look at beautiful as that? (Rita, you should be paying me for this free promotion!)

Adetola: Even in cases of rape, only one in a thousand men will honestly look at their wives or spouse mercifully,

It is very, very insensitive of you to classify rape with adultery/cheating. [s] It shows that you are one of the men who would desert your fiance or girlfriend if she is raped.[/s] Yet the same men will come around and call women 'irrational'. Who could be more irrational than someone who thinks [I]rape[/I] and adultery are basically the same thing?

Yes, it is true that most men would have trouble dealing with the rape of their wives and girlfriends. However, it is not a case of jealousy; it is a case of feeling like a failure. Most men see themselves as protectors of their girlffriends, their family. When a man's girlfriend or wife is raped, deep within him he feels [I]like a failure[/I] for not being able to protect her from the assailant. This is the real reason why such men end up deserting their wives or girlfriends.

So please, do not classify rape and cheating/adultery together; let us not bring disgrace to the entire male race.

If my fiancee or wife sleeps with someone else, I honestly don't know what I would do. I guess I would first of all want to know why she would do such a thing. However, I don't understand why couples engaging in premarital sex make a big deal about 'cheating' when in fact [I]you[/I] are the one who is 'cheating' his/her future husband or wife, since you probably won't marry her.

Sokari Ekine's blog has some articles about violence in Nigeria and how it makes our democracy fragile:
[list][li]Nigeria on the Verge of Imploding?[/li]
[li]Nigeria's Oil "Killing" Fields[/li]
[li]Religious and ethnic violence in Nigeria[/li][/list]

The Grandiose Parlour Blog, via OnlineNigeria.com, says:
"We should see beyond the rhetoric and sensationalism displayed by some, including President Obasanjo , over the US National Intelligence Council (NIC) report card on sub-Sahara Africa ..."

My reaction? I don't think the President's report was sensational at all. I believed that the main reason he published his reaction to the report is to prevent people who are in favor of secession from reading the report and getting all excited: "You see? Even the US predicts that we are going to need to pull out!"

Ka, I was wrong. There is an aspect of what you said I didn't grasp previously. The seed that grows babies also grows hair, wow!

What if the child says he/she doesn't believe you? What if he wants to see the seeds you are talking about? What if he demands for some seeds to show his friends?

This thread is a free for all. Go ahead and disregard all the forum participation guidelines.

Exago, tell us your story. Who and who did you help without getting a "thank you" in return?

Demmy, on most forums, only a small minority are regular posters. I am aware of certain steps that can be taken to encourage more registered members to become active, but you know I have to be sure I have enough manpower at my disposal to handle the required editing and moderation!

Ultimately, I respect the fact that 99% of forum activity is reading, not posting. Some registered members don't even bother to login to read the forum because they are browsing in the cafes and don't spend a lot of time online. I encourage registered members to login whenever they are online so they can interact with other members.

Why not lease some dedicated imbound number for sms messages from the telcoms and then you can provide services like instant news, competition, ringtones and logos etc.

I have considered it in the past. You should too.

The networks, particularly MTN and Globacom, seem have conspired to make what you're describing an extremely expensive venture. MTN demands up to 80% or more of your revenue while Vmobile demands 'just' 60%. In addition, you are responsible for advertising costs and you'll pay a set-up fee and monthly rental fee.

For MTN and Vmobile, see:
http://www.vmobile-nigeria.com/wasp.htm ("Wanna be a content provider?"
http://www.mtnonline.com/csp/index.asp ("Be a content service provider?"

For Glo and MTel, well, I guess it depends on who you know.

Hehe. Official welcome to all the new members. Please, make youselves at home and try to study the guidelines and how to make the forum better.

Remember, "English is the language of the web" and "'u' is not 'you'"!

Exago, thanks a million for introducing us to Skype.

It works very well in a VSAT network when you have extra bandwidth. However, I have not been able to get it to work well on the Multilinks Internet Network. Most of our FIxed Wireless ISPs have an explicit ban on the use of VoIP, and I definitely think the ban is in order!

Has anyone on the forum experienced some success with Skype? Tell us about it; let us know what sort of Internet connection you're on.

Another Skype feature is SkypeOut which is supposed to make it easy for people to make international calls. However, you need an International credit card. Very few people in Nigeria have acccess to such cards!

Have you had success with Skype or SkypeOut? Please, let us know about it!

The money 'to be made' in the Telecom sector being made off Nigerians ...

This article, however, refers to investments and not returns.

As far as I am concerned:
[list][li]Since they were not married, you cannot really say the guy was cheating on her. He was merely fornicating with a fresh body [/li][li]Her reaction was excessive, but perfectly understandable. I am glad the resisted the temptation to pour the acid on a human being![/li][li]Considering the fact that the guy was the cause of the whole impasse, it was extra-ordinarily wicked of him to keep taunting her. I am not sure that the right thing to do is to return to the relationship.[/li][/list]
As you can see, I have not answered the question. Help us out!

delarontus: Kids are getting smarter than we were as kids

I do not agree with this statement. Yes, kids are smart. You see, kids have always been smart!

The problem is that as we 'mature' we forget what it was like to be kids. Kids, really, are not that different from us - they are not brain-damaged, they are just a little bit inexperienced. I respect kids more than most yoruba men .

I have been telling friends that by the time my kids are 18 they will be capable of surviving and thriving without my assistance. (I'm about 23 and I am still learning to be successful on my own, but there is nothing in my brain now that was not there 5 years ago ...)

A conference report titled 'Mapping Sub-Saharan Africa's Future' by a group of experts assembled by the United States National Intelligence Council predicts the possibility of 'outright collapse of Nigeria'!

[I]"While currently Nigeria's leaders are locked in a bad marriage that all dislike but dare not leave, there are possibilities that could disrupt the precarious equilibrium in Abuja. The most important would be a junior officer coup that could destabilize the country to the extent that open warfare breaks out in many places in a sustained manner.

"If Nigeria were to become a failed state, it could drag down a large part of the West African region. Even state failure in small countries such as Liberia has the effect of destabilizing entire neighborhoods. If millions were to flee a collapsed Nigeria, the surrounding countries, up to and including Ghana, would be destabilized. Further, a failed Nigeria probably could not be reconstituted for many years—if ever—and not without massive international assistance."[/I]

Source: http://www.cia.gov/nic/confreports_africa_future.html

On the 17th of May 2005, President Obasanjo sent a 7 paragraph reaction titled 'Report of the US Intelligence Council" to be read on the floor of the Senate. Thisday Online provides us with the contents of the President's letter to the Senate:

[I]"As a means of informing ourselves, I hereby forward a copy of the United States National Intelligence Council document on "Mapping Sub-Saharan Africa's Future" for your attention. I am sending this to you not because I am alarmed by the report but because if we know what others think of us and about us, we can prevent what they project for us.

"As a person who has participated in similar so-called "expert group" on issues, situations and regions, I know that the predictions and projections can be wide off the mark because both politics and economics cannot be absolutely predicted and their dynamics can fool the greatest and best expert. But it is important for us to know that we are being rated low, not because of what is happening to us from outside but because of what we do to, for and by ourselves internally.

"I believe that it is only God and ourselves that can map our present and future. No outsider can do that accurately for us. I know that some people glibly talk of the probability of Nigeria as a failed State. I believe that they are living in the past and incapable of noticing and appreciating the positive strides we are making on all fronts and the determination of the Nigerian people to join hands to consolidate democracy and promote sustainable growth and development.

"Because they are stuck to old ideas and dreams as well as stereotypes about us and our capabilities, they cannot see the New Nigeria that we are building collectively as we move beyond the past but allowing the past and present to strengthen and sustain our future.

"Similar experts at the beginning of the second half of the 20th Century predicted worse scenarios for South East Asia. In fact, at the dawn of independence in Africa, Africa's chances were rated much better than that of South East Asia, but because they pulled themselves together, the predictions and projections about them have been proven false. In the case of Africa, the reverse has been true as the early favourable predictions and projections for the continent have remained largely unattained.

"If our detractors cannot see our far-reaching reforms, our fight against waste and corruption, the new culture of prudence and service delivery that is gradually emerging, the various political reforms including the on-going National Political Reform Conference as well as the sacrifices our people are making to ensure economic progress and democratic consolidation as indicators of progress and a radical departure from the past, then they must have some dubious or diabolical benchmarks for measuring efforts at ensuring oneness, unity, stability, indivisibility, prosperity, development and growth of our dear country.

"Our performance in the last three years has, in my view, been very good just as our performance in ensuring stability, peace, economic progress and good governance in West Africa and, indeed, the whole of Africa.

"I believe that we can and should disprove the modern experts of the United States Intelligence Council who are like the prophets of doom and by the Grace of God, for Nigeria in this first decade of the 21st Century, we must be determined to show that we are neither a basket case nor walking on a banana peel.

"I wish you well as you read the report and would very much appreciate your reactions, perspectives and suggestions. For me, it is a challenge and it calls for extra work. We owe that much to our people, to Africa, humanity and to God Almighty, our Creator. May God bless Nigeria and Africa."[/I]

http://thisdayonline.com/nview.php?id=18299 (username nairaland, password nairaland).

We need a massive, long-term re-education programme aimed at the masses. The government needs to let people know that we have democracy now and there are alternatives to violence. The various groups that are 'marginalized' need to be assured that their demands can be met without bloodshed.

I mean, I was alarmed to discover that, even as I'm typing this post, there are some people who are clamouring for Biafra. Even with all the reforms in progress, there are those who think their 'only hope' is to break away from Nigeria. Our are so predisposed to violence and tribalism that every disagreement between an hausa man and an ibo or yoruba man in Lagos can cause a riot.

Can the people of Nigeria ([I]the masses[/I]) of Nigeria [I]grow up[/I] fast enough to avert such disaster?