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Hello,

Please I've got a story for review. Kindly go through and add your comments and criticism .

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My neighbour's generator ( Part 1)

This must be a very heavy rain because the noise of the downpour as it hits the roofs of the neighbouring houses is deafening. How come I can't even feel the cooling effect of the rain. I'm still sweating like Christmas goat. In fact, my shirt is so soaked that if I wring it out, the liquid that will come out of it will be sufficient as the daily water intake for a family of four suppose it was potable water.

Let me look through the window to check what's happening sef. Has the world changed such that when it rains it brings heat instead of cold because they say change is the only constant thing in the world.Wait a minute, before I do that I need to remove this shirt and trousers before I turn into a dried stock fish (Panla) out of perspiration-induced-dehydration. NEPA or PHCN or whatever they call themselves has decided to leave their duty post to fend for themselves elsewhere. They only come to play with the power switches when they are on break at their other places of work. So, as at the time of this "personal press release" light no dey for man pikin to even put fan on. Na wah o.

(Peeps through the window) Chineke mee! No be rain o. Everywhere is as dry as the Sahara. So it's the generator of my neighbour making this thunderous noise. Although I brought some of my stuff earlier in
the day, I just finally moved into this house some hours ago, because the former place is too remote from civilisation. I thought I had escaped the bad roads, the horrible traffic jam, the intermittent noise that emanates from the small "I better pass my neighbour" generators of the neighbours in my previous apartment. The PHCN or electricity people ( as we don't even know what their name is now) only have 20 minutes break per day at their places of primary assignment in my previous area (Their secondary office is the NEPA/PHCN office). That's when they come to switch the power on and they switch it off when their break is over. So the generators in my previous community should be on ideally for 23hours 40minutes per day but I think my neighbours in that area do not have enough money to buy fuel to power their generators for 23hours 40 minutes daily. You can easily tell from the quality of their houses that they do not have that kind of money to spend on fuel. Thank God they just reduced pump price to N87, a 10% decrease in price notwithstanding that the global crude price reduced by 40%. We are only enjoying a tithe reduction because we are a very religious nation and whatever we do must have something to do with one religion or the other. So, our government followed the biblical injunction of paying a tithe (10%) this time around. Maybe this would encourage my former neighbours to operate a 23hour generator run. It might also be that their generators are too small to be safe outside at night as someone can just mistakenly use it as a hand luggage during the nocturnal house to house flight. So, they'd rather switch it off and keep it safe in their rooms while they are sleeping. Could it be that my former neighbours don't stay at home all the time as my new neighbours supposedly do? Could it be this? Could it be that? Whatever!


Enough of the past, let's face the present now. This generator must be massive. In fact it's got a house to itself from what I can see over the fence behind my window. Meanwhile, some people are homeless on the street. They could do with that generator house. The noise is thunderous . The only difference is that thunder is temporary but this is as constant as the absence of light (or power as the oyinbo people they call am) in my country. It's 3:22AM and I've not closed my eyes since 12midnight. Although I went to bed by 11PM when the generator had been on for about 6hours I suppose. So I only slept for 1hour and I think this is because I was very tired. (Were you almost confused there? Remember your secondary school mathematics? It's a word problem, go figure!) After the one-hour-fatigue-induced-sleep, I've been awake for 3hours 22minutes and still counting. I con dey think say abi make I turn am to "night vigil". "Guy, abeg, stop that thing, if na normal night vigil, you dey go?" That was my flesh speaking to my spirit. No wonder, Jesus said the flesh is weak.

Back to the issue, the owners of this generators ( whoever they are) are probably in their rooms sleeping but I'm here typing because they are sleeping. They probably have their air conditioner (AC) or fan on. They might even be under their duvet ( you no say e get the level wey AC go reach for Africa person go go abroad just to go and buy duvet to cover himself - it is called "levels" ). I'm here almost naked in my room because of the heat. They are probably in their pyjamas but I'm here in my boxers (Heat never do you something na im you still dey wear pyjamas). Don't get me wrong o, I'm not blaming them o, awon ko lo ko ba mi o (they weren't the ones that implicated me - best translation I can give). At least they cannot come and die. They have to chop the life of their head a little though I'm a direct victim of the consequences of their enjoyment.

Ok, me sef, shey na my fault say I move comot for where dey very far to come near civilisation? Abi na my fault say I no get money to buy fuel for generator to at least get fresh air (did I just say fresh?, sorry I meant ....,,,,, you know what I meant) from my old ceiling fan. Abi, I no con understand wetin dey happen again sef.

"Stop hiding there! I found you. You're the culprit, you're the one causing people to suffer. Causing the rich not to enjoy their wealth and the poor not to be able to endure their poverty. Aw! Mr Government, you can not provide basic amenities yet you have the effrontery to request and even coerce people to pay tax. We do not see (we only hear) what the tax money is used for. There's no stable electricity, we live as if this is the 18th century. In fact that century was even better because anytime I heard this type of noise in those days, I knew for certain it was a very heavy rain ( Ask me if I was alive then. Have you ever heard of this word R-E-I-N-C-A-R-N-A-T-I-O-N). All our slogans start with the word "NO". No light, No water, No road, No house, No job, No food, No clean air to breathe, No security, No nothing like the Americans will say. I'm sure if we investigate what the passwords of most citizens of my country are on social media such as Facebook and Twitter we'll discover it is "NoPassWord". We can't even say this is what has been perfected in this country of ours and that we are only waiting for other stuffs. Yet some individuals in governmental positions are gulping money that's enough to fix at least one of the menaces for the whole nation. I even heard recently that majority of the owners of the houses in the most expensive estate in London are citizens of my country. Yet, water, one of the most basic resources for human survival, is not available to citizens of their country. There's no potable water for people in our country to drink. Everybody is drinking sachet water. Do you guys have conscience at all?

It's 3:54AM, still No light, No silence and obviously No sleep! Work dey tomorrow o!