₦airaland Forum

Good

True

Nice concept. I like the school on the move concept

Feel free to share your opinion

Let me start with my neighbour. A young decent guy a staff of a new generation bank got married to a young lady. She also works in a manufacturing company with a relatively flexible work schedule. They got married about two years ago.
Now the baby boy arrived early this year. She decides with her husbands consent to move to her mother's house here in Lagos to assist in taking care of the child. She move out of the matrimonial home and the husband is all alone for about 6 months. At the moment, he has a couple of mistresses and I foresee danger ahead.
Now let's go back to our topic of discussion.
I'm here to share a few tips. I refer to them as life saving tips for every couple in Nigeria.

1. Do the things you did the first year you were dating.

As the months and years roll on, we tend to slink into our proverbial sweatpants and get lazy in our relationship. We lose our patience, gentleness, thoughtfulness, understanding and the general effort we once made toward our mate.
We get distracted by the stress of daily life. Lagos traffic, family matters, school fees, work related stress and all.
To be honest it is very easy to be unromantic in Nigeria considering all the stress we go through.
Think back to the first year of your relationship and write down all the things you used to do for your partner. Now start doing them again. This is very important especially for married couple.

2. Ask for what you want.

Over time, we assume that our partner knows us so well that we don’t need to ask for what we want. What happens when we make this assumption? Expectations are set and just as quickly, they get deflated. Those unmet expectations can leave us questioning the viability of our partnership and connection. Keep in mind that “asking for what you want” extends to everything from emotional to sexual wants. Remember communication is key.

3. Become an expert on your partner.

Think about who your mate really is and what excites him or her (both physically and emotionally). We can become consumed by what WE THINK he/she wants, as opposed to tuning in to what truly resonates with the other person. Remember that if it’s important to your partner, it doesn’t have to make sense to you. You just have to do it.

4. Don't ask "how was your day."

At the end of a long day, we tend to mentally check out of our lives and consequently, our relationship. We rely on the standard question, “How was your day?” Generally, that boring question will yield a boring answer such as, “Fine, how was yours?” This does nothing to improve your connection and instead, can actually damage it because you're losing the opportunity to regularly connect in a small way.

Instead, try asking things like, “What made you smile today?” or “What was the most challenging part of your day?” You’ll be amazed at the answers you’ll get, with the added benefit of gaining greater insight into your significant other.

5. Create a weekly ritual to check in with one another.

It can be short or long but it begins with asking each other what worked and didn’t work about the previous week and what can be done to improve things this coming week. Additionally, use this opportunity to get on the same page with your schedules, plan a date night and talk about what you would like to see happen in the coming days, weeks, and months in your relationship. Without an intentional appointment to do a temperature check, unmet needs and resentments can build.

6. Keep it sexy.

What might change in your relationship if both you and your partner committed to increasing the behaviors you each find sexy and limiting those that aren’t? Think about this in the broadest form. “Sexy” can certainly refer to bedroom preferences, but it also represents what excites us about our mate in our day-to-day lives. Do you find it sexy if he/she helps with the housework? Do you find it "unsexy" when he/she uses the restroom with the door wide open? Talk about what it specifically means to "keep it sexy" in your relationship. Be amazed, be humored, be inspired!

7. Get creative about the time you spend together.

Break out of the “dinner and a movie” routine and watch how a little novelty can truly rejuvenate your relationship. On a budget and can’t go big? Jump on the internet to look for “cheap date ideas” and be blown away at the plethora of options. Can’t afford a sitter? Try swapping babysitting time with friends that have kids. It’s free and they will likely be thrilled to take your kids because they will get to take advantage when they drop their kids at your place.

Note: feel free to share your comments, ask questions let us make this interractive

Reflect on this: "communication is key"
Feel free to ask questions or share your opinion. Single or married.

1. Do the things you did the first year you were dating.

As the months and years roll on, we tend to slink into our proverbial sweatpants and get lazy in our relationship. We lose our patience, gentleness, thoughtfulness, understanding and the general effort we once made toward our mate.
We get distracted by the stress of daily life. Lagos traffic, family matters, school fees, work related stress and all.
To be honest it is very easy to be unromantic in Nigeria considering all the stress we go through.
Think back to the first year of your relationship and write down all the things you used to do for your partner. Now start doing them again. This is very important especially for married couple.

2. Ask for what you want.

Over time, we assume that our partner knows us so well that we don’t need to ask for what we want. What happens when we make this assumption? Expectations are set and just as quickly, they get deflated. Those unmet expectations can leave us questioning the viability of our partnership and connection. Keep in mind that “asking for what you want” extends to everything from emotional to sexual wants. Remember communication is key.

3. Become an expert on your partner.

Think about who your mate really is and what excites him or her (both physically and emotionally). We can become consumed by what WE THINK he/she wants, as opposed to tuning in to what truly resonates with the other person. Remember that if it’s important to your partner, it doesn’t have to make sense to you. You just have to do it.

4. Don't ask "how was your day."

At the end of a long day, we tend to mentally check out of our lives and consequently, our relationship. We rely on the standard question, “How was your day?” Generally, that boring question will yield a boring answer such as, “Fine, how was yours?” This does nothing to improve your connection and instead, can actually damage it because you're losing the opportunity to regularly connect in a small way.

Instead, try asking things like, “What made you smile today?” or “What was the most challenging part of your day?” You’ll be amazed at the answers you’ll get, with the added benefit of gaining greater insight into your significant other.

5. Create a weekly ritual to check in with one another.

It can be short or long but it begins with asking each other what worked and didn’t work about the previous week and what can be done to improve things this coming week. Additionally, use this opportunity to get on the same page with your schedules, plan a date night and talk about what you would like to see happen in the coming days, weeks, and months in your relationship. Without an intentional appointment to do a temperature check, unmet needs and resentments can build.

6. Keep it sexy.

What might change in your relationship if both you and your partner committed to increasing the behaviors you each find sexy and limiting those that aren’t? Think about this in the broadest form. “Sexy” can certainly refer to bedroom preferences, but it also represents what excites us about our mate in our day-to-day lives. Do you find it sexy if he/she helps with the housework? Do you find it "unsexy" when he/she uses the restroom with the door wide open? Talk about what it specifically means to "keep it sexy" in your relationship. Be amazed, be humored, be inspired!

7. Get creative about the time you spend together.

Break out of the “dinner and a movie” routine and watch how a little novelty can truly rejuvenate your relationship. On a budget and can’t go big? Jump on the internet to look for “cheap date ideas” and be blown away at the plethora of options. Can’t afford a sitter? Try swapping babysitting time with friends that have kids. It’s free and they will likely be thrilled to take your kids because they will get to take advantage when they drop their kids at your place.

@ poster, u are in the wrong place. Business section is more appropriate.

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Thank you
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