I laugh at your comment because you do not know a thing about abuse, read well i didn't say abusive marriages..
And I never mentioned that any home be broken.

Nutase:
Home breakers. People that write this kind of posts are the ones that will not leave even when they are abused.

An abusive relationship itself is like an addictive drug. Takes a lot of courage to let go.. The abuser use a lot of humiliating and dominating methods to keep the victim in check..

Mynd44:
Plan to leave? You make relationships sound like an addictive drug

Admit you are being abused: the first step in getting help, is to admit you really need on. Snap out of your self denial.

2. Talk to trusted people: most people who are abused find it extremely difficult to talk to anyone. They believe they should protect the abuser. When you talk you get a strong support group, who will help you through it all.

3. Work out an escape plan: remember you have just one purpose in mind getting out of the relationship. It will be a good thing if you really plan how you will go about it. A safe and secret place to stay, some extra cash, clothes and important toiletries.

4. Make your plan to leave a secret: if your abuser gets to find out you are about to get out of a relationship they will do everything within their powers to keep you. Make your plan to leave a secret.

5.If possible, have evidence of the abuse: you should have an evidence of the abuse, you could record the person when threatening you or take photographs in the case of physical and sexual abuse. It will help you if you want to take up the case legally.

Stay safe and away from abuse. You deserve to be happy.

MizMyColi:
Could you please proffer a way forward?

There are different forms of abuse. Emotional, physical, sexual and financial. A lot of people are into abusive relationships and are finding it very difficult to let go. Walking out of an abusive relationship takes a lot of strength and courage. There are simple ways in which one can get out of abusive relationships.

1. Admit you are being abused: the first step in getting help, is to admit you really need on. Snap out of your self denial.

2. Talk to trusted people: most people who are abused find it extremely difficult to talk to anyone. They believe they should protect the abuser. When you talk you get a strong support group, who will help you through it all.

3. Work out an escape plan: remember you have just one purpose in mind getting out of the relationship. It will be a good thing if you really plan how you will go about it. A safe and secret place to stay, some extra cash, clothes and important toiletries.

4. Make your plan to leave a secret: if your abuser gets to find out you are about to get out of a relationship they will do everything within their powers to keep you. Make your plan to leave a secret.

5.If possible, have evidence of the abuse: you should have an evidence of the abuse, you could record the person when threatening you or take photographs in the case of physical and sexual abuse. It will help you if you want to take up the case legally.

Stay safe and away from abuse. You deserve to be happy.

Every relationship is dynamic.. Just make the right choices and be happy. That's all..

Thanks for the compliment..

mcdokwe:
It is perfectly allowed for her to annoy me just as I wish she understands I can annoy her too without intending it. We are just humans and communication is key. It is expected that if it happens that we get back together, I should have to battle and overcome new realities of life not such I have encountered before and sought change from.

Besides, nice blog you've got

Yes, you both can still work something out but what happens when abuse occurs again. Abuse that has occured once can probably occur again.
I think you both need to see a counsellor, no relationship is perfect and be rest assured that she will annoy you again sometime in the future.

mcdokwe:
I have always believed no relationship is perfect. The beauty in some relationships is so because two people in it wants it to work and try to make it work and have always communicated same to her, I have a huge interest in the relationship and if it happens that she is still interested and willing to work things out, I'd no doubt give my best to that.

But if she was going to re-enact many of the things she used to, then we are better off separated. My daughter would hopefully grow to understand.

I have realized that a lot of relationship and marriage bloggers post nice life changing articles on their blogs that only few people get to benefit from.

Lets share our thoughts,links and even challenges.
Let's network and also encourage each other some people quit blogging because they were not encouraged, let us network.

As for me i blog at www.gabbyspeaks.com

My dear brother you were in an abusive relationship, she abused you emotionally and you retaliated physically. I think you both need to take a break from your relationship and work out what is best for you. No woman deserves to be abused, and no man deserves it either.. You both were to work out your differences but you didnt, if you both eventually get back together you need to seek help because a lot has gone wrong in this relationship..

mcdokwe:
I read a lot about how men who hit their partners are nothing but beasts, I nearly joined the bandwagon of accusers because I couldn't fathom how uncontrollable one's temper could be as to turn one's partner to a punching bag.

Don't get me wrong, I deeply regret I ever hit her, unfortunately that is one reason that apparently hold water as a reason for leaving even though she never gets to tell the whole story.

She had been a very good girl, and even till date, the only girl I have lost myself in love to. Yes, I have been a broke ass nigga and thankfully she could be a low maintenance lady.

She once told me how some of her stupid friends asked if I have hit her before obviously looking for shortfalls to convince her she shouldn't be dating me and how she proudly told them I hadn't for once.

In fairness to the truth, I learnt a lot from her and having her taught me how to treat my sister who was her age better.
At a point in her life, she had no genuine friend and would always moan to me how bad some friend or the other treated her and how she wasn't interested in their friendship anymore and I had to constantly remind her that people are different and so with their motives, I always encouraged her to try to understand such motives before writing them off.
I literally became her only friend and unfortunately shoved some people who could have been some sort of relief aside so much that we had just each other
Days became weeks and months and she conceived for me and a lot started changing about her. Maybe in her bid to feel acceptable, she got entangled with people she wrote completely off before, this wasn't a so much of a challenge because atleast she could whine less about them to me, her dress sense changed and she turned deaf ears to my appeal for explanation, I had to adapt to some of those challenges but unfortunately those friends became more valuable to her than myself even though we had a child coming and lived together, she shared less of her worries with me but would tell them even the minutest detail of our relationship which were frequently misrepresented maybe in a bid to gain sympathy which she eventually got. They explained my actions and inactions better than I could and she could go for days without talking to me so long as the meal was provides and the babies need met, she opted for a break anytime I told her of her upsetting attitude and the need to work on it, but would never tell me of her own misgivings towards me even when I plead so I could work on myself too, but would rather discuss unthinkable issues with her friends.

Fast forward to that particular day, a lady who I encouraged her to make friends with because of her distress and the feeling we could be of help to sent a text to her sim which happened to be on my phone saying she needs to know when I left the house so she could come over and I was wth! This is some one I brought in, someone whose coming means she is to fend from my toil, and I asked what it could be that I did that should warrant such. I sent her a text telling her never to bother coming anymore as I wasn't leaving the house that day anymore. She called her back and asked her only God knows what and my lady went up in frenzy insulting me not minding that a third party was there.
Minutes later the other girl stopped by to apologise stating that I misunderstood her text but my girlfriend continued the insult asking why she should bother to explain or apologise. After a while every other person left and she became apologetically cosy, well I shrugged her off knowing her being apologetic doesn't stop her from insulting me the next minute if she felt like, and true to my prediction, even while she was still being sorry, her words turned from being apologetic to outright insult, calling me unprintable names and how I am a hopeless orphan (I lost my dad the previous year and my mum is still very much alive and she is so lettered and knows what an orphan means) well I said something too of her family because I was hurt but could never match her with words and I made to leave the house in that fit of anger. But she locked the door and wouldn't let me. She turned apologetic again and then insulting, in that state all I could do was pity her because I couldn't imagine how someone could be so unstable, I was visibly frustrated and made to leave the house which she wouldn't have either and I had to forcefully remove her from the way. She came back hard on my, making for anything. That could be converted into a weapon, thankfully I was stronger and made her efforts futile. I pinned her to the ground with the intention to make her realise I am stronger than our love sessions where I played weak to let her have an upper hand so she could give up already, but the moment I released her a bit, she reached for my phone and smashed it on the floor repeatedly, I regrettably gave her some blows and because I didn't want it to continue, opened the door so a neighbour could come in a stop the fight. I later stormed out with the child and headed for a family who had rendered enough care to us and she later found her way there, I expected her to behave more in their presence but that was to wishful of me and unfortunately the ladies couldn't stop me as I gave her even deadlier blows but mehn, she never really got enough.

She was later forced into one of the rooms in the apartment and locked up with the baby.
After a while I walked to that point seeing how pitiful she looked asked her with tears in my eyes why she was acting the way she does to which she replied with a tone that could melt the devil's heart that she didn't know and was sorry. We packed up and went back home to the astonishment of all who saw us fight. Needless to say we made love that night after which she confessed she never knew I could hit her even after I was with her at the delivery room and declared no woman should be beaten by her man. She also owned up and apologised for pushing me to that point.

She also told me how a particular friend of hers who came in after the fight had told her not to have sex with me that night and all that.

The relationship lasted for a little longer without fights and she left while I was away for reasons still not clear to me, and looking back I regret that I ever let her pushing me to the point of hitting her but I still believe firmly that she deserved it.

Thank you for the reply.. I was asking two questions at once. I meant to ask if i can be granted admission without my nysc certificate. I know so schools demand transcript so was wondering if they request for transcript too

BornSad post=3113 2042:


Your question is ambiguous, dear.

You said you haven't yet gone for service and then you're asking if they will take you without transcript. I don't understand how your academic transcript relates to NYSC.

NYSC gives NYSC certificate, schools give academic transcript. These two are independent of each other so which are asking if they'll take you without?

Whichever, yeah, you can start registration without both. But transcript will be required later.

Regards.

I want to start my msc in noun but am yet to be mobilized for nysc. will i be grant admission without my transcript ...

BEDE.IKE:
please n please I need help, my Droid vpn has neva worked b4 it keeps saying no tun module, I jxt got tun ko installer n it says no compatible tun module, I use a rooted HTC aspect s610d runin on OS 2.3. o don't kno at else to do. please help me

u do not need all dat. Jst go to connection protocol n use udp den set the port at 500 dats all..Iave not rooted ma fone n am using it.

Tanks bro I ave done dat n its working fyn..

sonayan:
d same tin appen to me,sum times ago,i did d 1500 own.
just subscribe for #100 worth of data,it wil add to ur prv data,put ur phone off n on,i tink dat shld help.
thanks to d brother dat gave me d advise,sorry forgoten ur name

honsule:


u have lost ur cash dear .It's actually meant for BB.Just email me for help

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Gabbyswit: pls help ♍ε̲̣̣̣̥ I subscribed for airtel bis on my q1 n I ave nt been able to browse..pls someone should help ♍ε̲̣̣̣̥..network is showing bt its nt browsing

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amedino:
GO TO SETTINGS AND CHANGE UR AIRTEL TO DEFAULT UNDER DATA CONNECTION

pls help ♍ε̲̣̣̣̥ I subscribed for airtel bis on my q1 n I ave nt been able to browse..pls someone should help ♍ε̲̣̣̣̥..network is showing bt its nt browsing