₦airaland Forum

Hello,

I will be brief and straight to the point. I got married last August 2021. We dated for two years with only one issue. That issue was the fact that girls were always flocking around him and I feel he does not do enough to drive them away. He says what do I expect him to do when girls always flirt with him. I always tell him to let them know he is taken, but he will just laugh over the matter and says its not his fault that he is handsome.

Well, he is quite handsome and that is his biggest flaw. He knows it…he is boastful about it. I do not like how it makes him feel…he is not humble at all. I tried to end the relationship but he will always beg me, saying he needs me in his life to help him remain grounded and not get carried away by all these female attention he gets.

Eventually, he began to act maturely and that gave me some comfort to proceed with the marriage plans. Since we have been married, all is ok … God blessed us and I am pregnant with our first child. Pregnancy is a serious challenge for me being my first time. So, I have to rely on my hubby to do alot of things for me like shopping, cleaning, etc.

My husband actually likes to help because he does not want me to stress myself or the baby. So, like I said, I have been asking him to help with the groceries and he has been helpful. But last week, I went to the groceries without husband in the supermarket close to our house.

After shopping, one of the sales girls who is a very nice girl greeted me very warmly as usual. She mentioned that she has not seen me since and I explained that I have not been feeling well but that my husband has been coming to the supermarket for me. This girl told me that she wants to tell me something very important and that I should give her my no. I was a bit surprised at her boldness because I thought she wanted to beg for money or something .

However, I gave her the number because she is always a sweet girl to me whenever I come to shop. When this girl closed her shift, she called me and told me that she wants to tell me something but I must guarantee that I will never tell anyone she was the one that told me. She first asked if I was alone cos she will not say anything if someone was with me.

After assuring her that I was alone, she then revealed that if not that she has known me for a while, she would have minded her business. But that she wanted me to know that her supervisor has been flirting seriously with my husband and she thinks my husband is encouraging her to do so.

This girl revealed that she saw her supervisor ask my husband for his phone, he gave it to her and she out her phone number in it. That my husband just smiled and went away. That the same supervisor bragged with another female colleague that she would do all in her power to get my husband.

That even when that one colleague asked her why she would go after a married man, she replied, I am not forcing him, he is the one married and needs to be faithful, that she has no reason to be faithful. This girl went to say that she is very sorry for telling me things about my husband but she knows that this same supervisor of her is one without shame. That she had an affair with another colleague’s boyfriend and got that one fired because she is a supervisor.

This girl stated that the supervisor is mean to alot of her colleagues and she is evil minded. That she wants me to pray against any of the girl’s manipulation of my husband. I listened to this girl and thanked her. I was furious and embarrassed. Embarrassed that a common supermarket sales girl was talking about my marriage and furious because I didn’t know how to handle the matter.

So, I chatted with this same girl and told her to text me the supervisor’s no. She did and I used my husband’s phone to flash the girl’s number. He saved her number as Funmi contractor. I was livid. I checked his chats and saw that the girl was offering him s3x already. She sent her pictures of her breasts already. The rest of the chat was deleted. I am sure, I would have seen more crazy chats if they were not deleted.

When I confronted my husband, he denied everything I asked him about the girl until I showed him a screenshot of their last chat. He said maybe someone was framing him and I told him I would leave and divorce him immediately. He then said, he didn’t give her his no but she got it from the supermarket computer.

When I told him everyone was talking about them in the supermarket, he held his head and said…babe, I am sorry…I was stupid…I should not have given her my no…but I swear….I never reached out to her…she has been the one forcing herself on me. My husband and I had a long talk…he explained that while he may seem like he is playing with these girls, he can never stoop so low to actually sleep with any of them. That he is just playing, that I have no reason to worry cos he will never cross the boundaries.

Now, this his defense….I believe…but it is an expensive play…and what I cannot wrap my head around is: why my husband cannot stand his ground. Must you be this playful? The play to him is disrespect to me. He said I am just being unreasonable. That its normal for men to play or flirt with women…that any man who says they dont do that are lying or they are castrated.

Yes, girls are desperate…but if you cannot stand your ground, he is disrespecting me and I cannot tolerate that. My husband believes that until I catch him sleeping with another woman, then its not cheating. That its like window shopping….he is looking but not buying….what a chauvinistic perspective…. its really annoying me…When I spoke to someone about it….someone like an elder, he said, men are like that…wives just have to learn to look away and not let the situation bother them.

This matter is bothering me. I cannot stop these girls from coming for my man but the fact that my man thinks its funny to entertain them is my problem. Why cant married men stop this shit? My dad is a fine man too…I have never seen him disrespect my mother. I do not know what to so about this…if my husband continues like this…this might be enough reason for me to leave.

It may be a minor reason for some people but I am big on respect. We are married…respect our vows…respect your wife…stop entertaining hungry girls. How hard is it to say no? Am I being overly paranoid? Or am I supposed to just live with this? Is my standard or expectation too high?

When I asked him what if I was the one flirting, he laughed and said he will not be bothered. Well, maybe because he knows I can never do that…also, I cannot help but feel that my husband’s bad behavior is maybe because I am pregnant and may not be as attractive as I should be looking or as s3xy as I should be in bed…my husband says my pregnancy hormones are making me over react…am I over reacting?

Please advice me because thinking about this is causing serious trust issues in my marriage. I need your advise. I am loosing my mind.


https://livelystones.ng/2022/01/08/true-life-story-women-flirt-with-my-husband-he-says-its-not-a-big-deal/

Video of a man fingering his lover while on a fully booked flight has gone viral after being shared online.

The man’s hand was seen in between his lover’s legs which they stylishly covered with a dress. The lady gave out soft m*anings and clinged to her man’s hand mid-way through the act.

Facebook user, Oma Michael shared the video with the caption;


If you don’t gerrit , forgerabourit….Olololololooooooo!!
Na to begin book flight o


Watch the video below……………………….


https://livelystones.ng/2022/01/07/video-of-a-man-fingering-his-lover-while-on-a-flight-goes-viral-18-video/

Pls ma post for me and hide me ID

I have been in a relationship with a guy since 2018,he is a nice person but doesn't have much money but he has been trying his best for me.

He has helped me through thick and thin ,even when my house expired he offered me his place to stay till I got mine. When we met he told me about his ex which broke up with him in 2017 for failure to make it on time and pay her dowry because according to him ,he promised to marry her, he told me he can't go back to her again because she followed people's advice and left him but fast forward to 2020 and this year I noticed that they are still communicating romantically, chatting and doing videos and when I confronted my guy he said he doesn't have anything to do with her of which I believed him but later it was getting out of hand so I called d girl and she denied having anything to do with him, my guy even said she is married but d husband stays abroad and doesn't take care of her which makes him to be calling her to avoid depression.

I still believed only to discover that each time my guy goes for outside work he spends the weekend with her and note that his family knows the girl and d girls family knows him too, he has been sleeping over in her place for over 3 times the ones I found out, but keeps deceiving me that he passed down to his sister's place, one day I opened his phone and find out nasty chats how he told the girl she is very sweet and also on my birthday when he posted my pics he still went and told the girl that he is posting it just for me to feel import that it is not fro his heart that he does not love me is d girl he loves, I saw many things both their pic on Snapchat empty body, dancing and romancing each other.

I was so heartbroken and we fought, he opened up that he loves her and that he will still go ahead and marry her meanwhile up till now he has not defined our relationship, each time I ask him he says everything is in the hands of God, so where I need advice now is, I joined their church because I just like the way they do things although it is not the same branch we worship, there is a guy there that has been my friend, ever since I joined the church we have been very good friends and he helps me in his own Little way but has not said anything about relationship, this my guy knows him in fact he is his friend though not too close, early this year the guy and I has become very close friends like he tells me everything about himself and future plans, he doesn't go to sleep without hearing from me even when am in my guy's place he will call in d night and my guy will become angry saying that am dating his friend but I told him we are just good friends.

I discover that the guy loves me so much and I have feelings for him too and recently we have started seeing each other, note that he is against s3x before marriage ,he only hugs me but we haven't kissed, he has high moral standard more than my present guy but he always tell me that he is not ready for any serious relationship because he doesn't want to make a promise he can't fulfil but he doesn't also know why he likes me so much and that he has many female friends but am the nicest, he tells his friends about me and he respects me so much, each time I see him I feel some special kind of way and I have this peace of mind with him, and I can see that also in him, one month ago I broke up with my guy because of his attitude to me like cheating with his ex, being so angry and not caring ,after the break up I became more closer to that his his friend, so last week he came and begged me again when he discovered that I and the church guy are getting serious, he begged me and promised to change, because of the love I had for him and how he has helped me through this years I had to accept him back.

I slept over in his place and I don't know how he did it and opened my phone while I was asleep and checked my messages with the guy, when he asked me I denied not knowing that he has seen everything, so he opened all our chats that he screenshot and showed me, I told him that I was just lonely and needed someone to talk to that I don't have anything to do with him, he said he has forgiven me but he is still very mad at me and he himself is still contacting his ex, he hasn't still defined out relationship and I am 3 years close to thirty, the truth is that I love that my church guy so much more than him although he doesn't have money which is not my problem, I feel at peace with that one, my guy and I we are still having grudges over what happened.

I have tried hard to love him like before but no way, and him too said his love for me has reduce, pls don't criticize me I need advice, i am so confuse, last month a keke driver I don't knw from anywhere told me that the man that is very close to me is my husband but it's hard for him to tell me ,he said the man is from a very far place if I will accept him nd there is no other person close to me than the guy and he is from a far place but I love him ,I dn't knw wat to do


https://livelystones.ng/2022/01/04/true-life-story-i-am-in-love-with-the-love-of-my-life-but-i-am-falling-apart/

Good day...

Please post for me, I'm heart broken. I noticed that anytime I go into a relationship at the beginning it will be very sweet then along the line the guy will just develop unnecessary hatred towards me for no just cause.

Now currently, I've been in a relationship for 4 to 5years now though i left him sometime because I asked him the future of the relationship but no reply and I later came back because of the love I have for him and that has been the worst mistake of my life. Coming back to him again this guy dealt with me. I became emotionally unstable. He started using abusive words on me, how Is because I'm opening leg for him and his entering so I think the both of us are age mate, a whole lot of things that he said to me that no man will like to loss a good man.

READ ALSO: My Ex Dumped Me Before So I Am Scared Of Being Seen As Desperate

I cried my eyes out asking God were I actually went wrong, because I don't understand where the words I'm hatred is coming from, this particular guy made me commit 4 abortion all because he told me he does not have a stable job yet and wouldn't want me to suffer. I tolerated his womanizing habits and lot more because of love, but each time he wants to talk to me he always tells me how over sense is worrying me, that he is leaving because I have too much sense.

For close to one year now we've gone our separate ways but I'm yet to move on each time I see him I always I always feel bad and my heart beats faster, at times I will just go home and cry.

I'm finding it difficult to go into another relationship and I now see all men like the same. Please how do I overcome each time I think about him I shed tears for allowing myself to be used up to this level but I still love him.


https://livelystones.ng/2022/01/02/true-life-story-he-used-and-dumped-me-after-4-abortions-how-do-i-get-him-off-my-mind-help/

Good morning,

Ma pls post for me and hide my id l am married for fifteen years now, my husband has been treating me like a slave, after three month of our traditional wedding we have some little misunderstanding he throw all my loads outside it was my landlady that beg for me and it was abomination in my place for husband to do that so l told my mom and my senior sister my mom said l should endure it but my sister came but he was insulting my sister ,that is how l have been enduring in year 2019 he send me and my four children outside second January 2019 inside cool harmattan season the church intervene and he allowed us inside.

l lost my father he follow me to the village and his people came as well but during the burial none of them came l received the insult of my life l cried bitterly because l was disgrace publicly by my stepbrothers and sister, my mother died this year the same thing happened l endure all these because of my children, he lost his job, l and my children pray and fast till he got another job the day he got the job we were happy that GOD has answers our prayer all the hungry and suffering is over not knowing that it is the beginning of our suffering.

READ ALSO: My Husband’s Family Is Driving Me Crazy-Is Divorce The Only Way?

l am a teacher in a private school, right from the day he started the work i am the one paying his transportation going and coming for seven months some times we will be starved to give him transportation, he promise not to forget all that l have done for him he even said that his first salary he will buy me clothes to show his appreciation but to my greatest surprise when he collected his money he started nagging that his salary was too small l told him that he should be managing it some time he will not give us money for food l will not talk I will just manage anything l see, this very one pains me so much that l want to commit suicide.

last upper week Saturday l went to church to clean the church of God l and my daughter reaching there the person that hold church key was not around so we agree to come back in the evening to clean the church when l came back l told him everything, he now said we should cook akara(beans cake) l am using charcoal stove, he refuse to fill gas and kerosene for stove, so when l was cooking the charcoal refuse to catch l have to blow the charcoal to catch, all this process he was sleeping.

ALSO READ: My Husband Wants Me To Choose Between My Newfound Faith And Our Marriage-Pls Advise

when he woke up he started complaining that l was slow l told him that the charcoal refuse to Catch, l fry the first set of akara l took it to him he ate and still pouring insult on me when it was time for me to go to choir practice i told him he said l should go when l came back l asked the children where did their father went to because l did not met him at home l prepare swallow for dinner when he came back he was calling me all manners of name, insulting my late mother that was when l started insulting him too, the following morning he refused to go to church l and my children went to church when we came back from church we discover that he has bought food and eat so my children started linking the plate he used l went to him told him if he buy food he should eat it there ,that was how he started breaking all my plates out of anger l pushed him down he started crying that am fighting him immediately l started begging him to forgive me.

my greatest surprise the following day he served me divorced paper from the court because he work in court of appeal his step sister called him and told him to withdraw the case from court he is now laying allegations that he is suspecting me that l am following men and is against their culture that i should go home do sacrifice which is against my Christianity l cannot compromise my faith because l have suffer a lot l don't want to sin against GOD pls advice me should l agree to the divorce or what, so sorry for the long post

https://livelystones.ng/2022/01/01/true-life-story-do-i-accept-the-divorce-or-accept-to-offer-sacrifice-to-idol-against-my-faith/

BREAKING!!! Join The Cross-Over Night Online Service With Pastor Chris Oyakhilome Tonight

Its just a few hours to the end of the year 2021. For many, it has been filled with bittersweet memories, continued challenges, or even more upheaval. But in the middle of chaotic times and uncertain futures, there was a hope we could all cling to.

To enter into a glorious year of 2022, you can click the following links to join Pastor Chris Oyahkhilome and many Christians all over the world to participate in the annual 31st Cross Over Service using any of the following links:


https://livelystones.ng/2021/12/31/breaking-join-the-cross-over-night-online-service-with-pastor-chris-oyakhilome-tonight/

Please hide my identity. I am a 35 year old married woman needing your help. I got married to my husband six years ago. Two years into our marriage, my husband got HIV. I was devastated because it later revealed that he was cheating on me with someone in his office and several other women who must have given him the virus.

By that time, I was already pregnant with our son. It was a very devastating period for me. Thank God, my test came out negative. I moved out of my husband's house for a year cos I could not accept the fact that I was married to someone who not only cheated on me but has the tendency to infect me with a deadly disease.

With the retroviral treatments, my husband was able to manage the disease. Him and his family started begging me and my family. They asked a doctor to speak to me about the fact that the disease cannot be contacted by me if we get back together and my husband continues to use condom when we have s3x.

After alot of prayers, counselling and medical consultations, I moved back into my husband's house last year. Since that time, we have been using protection. Its not the same but we do not have a choice. Now, I have been trying to have a second child and the only way to do that in a safe way is through IVF. Its been a very tough one cos the IVF is expensive and the first trial I had did not stay.

That was early this year. I was  still hoping the do another one before the end of the year or next year. Only for my husband to hit me with another bomb. I stumbled on my husband's chat with a girl in October. The girl was telling him that she is pregnant for him and he was denying the pregnancy.

READ ALSO: What Is Happening To Me-Is This An STD Or Did She Lay A Curse On Me?

I was furious. Another cheating again? What is all these. When I confronted my husband, he denied everything. But I began to threaten to expose him and tell the girl that he has HIV. That was when he confessed and said he didnt do it because he wanted to hurt me but because having s3x with condom is not enjoyable...that he just wanted to feel it naturally, that is why he had s3x with a random girl, someone who does not know his status.

To my surprise, my husband explained that as long as his viral load has been undetectable for six months, he is unable unable to pass HIV along through s3x and as long as he  continue to take his HIV treatments and remain undetectable. He says he can have s3x without a condom without worrying about passing HIV to anyone.

So I asked him why didn't he tell me about his discovery, he said, he was just being careful cos he loves me and does not want to take any chances with me, that is why he would not make love to me without condom but he would take his chances with a complete stranger. I was angry but what he said made sense but what about getting someone else pregnant?

My husband was able to convince the girl to get an abortion, he showed me the proof that he took her for an abortion. Mind you, I do not support my husband cheating or lying about his HIV status. After that incident, my husband has been trying to make love with me without using a condom. I am scared.

I know it can be safe but it can also be dangerous. He is begging me to allow him a few times, cos he does not want to cheat on me again. That girls are throwing themselves at him and he is facing temptation daily.

Few days ago, he tried to penetrate and I discovered he didn't use protection, I got angry and pushed him away. He also got angry and started staying rubbish...that if I cant satisfy him s3xually, maybe we should just part ways...or let him sleep with other women that will give him what he wants...that its like I want to keep punishing him cos he has HIV. That he cannot live the rest of his life like this.

READ ALSO: I Feel Devastated And Depressed! My Husband Cheating With Another Woman & Blaming Me For It

I cried and cried cos I know how frustrating he feels but I cannot put my life in danger. My husband has barely spoken to me since two days ago. I spoke to my doctor and he repeated the same thing. He said the drugs my husband is taking can keep us safe but that its not 100% guarantee. He also said that if I have unprotected s3x with my husband or anyone else, I must continue to test every 3 months for HIV.

Everyone is saying the ball is in my court. That I either choose to remain in this marriage and face the risk or leave the marriage so my husband can marry someone that can s3xually satisfy him. My husband is saying if I truly love him and have forgiven him, I will do this for him...

Is this not emotional blackmail? How do I stay and let him f*ck whoever he wants, just so he does not put my life in danger? Or actually put my life in danger to prove my love for him? . I am being selfish?...I am afraid...Is this worth the risk? Should I leave the marriage? What should I do please?

Anonymous


https://livelystones.ng/2021/12/30/true-life-experience-my-husband-is-hiv-positive-and-blames-me-for-cheating/

My husband and I were having a fight.. So we were not talking.. He was giving me the silent treatment.. I also ignored him and we went on like that for the whole day..

After work that day.. I returned home.. Made dinner and we ate.. He went in to sleep while I stayed to watch my programs.. Later I joined him i n bed.. I couldn't sleep.. I kept turning and tossing.. I was restless.. I went to drink cold water and returned.. He was fast asleep already.. I was so Hot but we were fighting so.. I had to suppress my urges..

READ ALSO: My Husband Younger Brother(My Ex) Raped Me: Pls Advise

Early morning I got up to pee. When I returned he was still sleeping but he had a strong erection. This made me even more Hot.. I looked at it for a while and wondered but this thing is mine nau.. Why am I making shakara.. That's how I slowly took it out and grabbed it in my mouth oo.. Someone that was sleeping suddenly woke up and said wat are you doing.. I didn't even answer him.. He said stoppppppp.. He said stoooooooooopppppp... I stopped sucking, shifted pants and sat on it jeje... I was still beefing him of course but the beef did not reach that side please.. I started rolling and whining and flipping and thrusting..

Someone that was mad at me suddenly started moaning.. Baby stop this.. Stopeeeeet.. Stooop ahh stoop... I was just giving him side eye.. That's how we both came crumbling and collapsing with so much passion..

After that I went to shower and dress up for work.. He said where are you going.. I said work of course.. He said do you realise you just used and dumped me And that was how we burst out laughing..

READ ALSO: My Boyfriend Drugged And Raped Me

We had breakfast and both left for work.. Then he sent me sweet messages later.. Baby i want us to fight more often. This our cute little fight was so adorable and you totally knocked me off this morning.. Because you hardly initiate s*x.. So keep it up.. Love you and have a nice day... Since I received this text I've been smiling..

Love is beautiful.. Marriage is wonderful..

May you have the marriage of your dream



Source: https://livelystones.ng/2021/12/28/how-i-raped-my-husband/

If I am being honest, never have best friends or trust people, no matter how much you want to believe there is good in people, just don’t be naive like me.

My name is Chiwendu (not real name) . I am 45 years old and single. I am not single because I am not attractive but because earlier in my younger days, I refuse to be distracted from chasing a successful career in Tech. Tech is a male dominated space and we are usually very anti social people too.


My so called best friend who married a fine boy was always having issues in her marriage. The guy was up coming but my friend wanted more. She cheated several times on her husband. I was the one always coming to settle their issues cos am not just est friend, I am also God mother.

I didn’t want their children to suffer of the marriage broke up. Eventually, my friend left her husband and ran away with a rich older man. She left her son with her husband but she took the daughter who is just 5 years old.

My friend’s husband had a hard time adjusting as a single parent but I was always there to help. My friend too used to beg me to check on her son from time to time for her.I didn’t like it but after like a year,my friend’s husband started flirting with me. He would say he does not know why a very attractive woman like me does not have
A boyfriend or not married.

My friend’s ex husband and I had s*x after like 15 months after ther separation. I thought he genuinely loved me cos he was always professing his love for me. After like 9 months of having secret affairs with him,I had to ask him where is the relationship going cos he says he’s having a good time with me, I was getting tired of waiting for him to publicly acknowledge me as his lover but he never did.

When I asked him, he said he considers it wrong to date or marry me cos I am his ex wife best friend and his children’s god mother. He says we are just having fun cos he’s trying to help me since I don’t have a man. His wife has moved on…we are f*cking everyday…why should I hide when we are all adults who choose what we want. He was justing using me, I finally realized.

This man later started sleeping with another close friend of his ex wife. When I confronted him, he didn’t deny it, he just said he is a grown man and he can do whatever he likes.

Do you know this man went to tell my friend, his ex wife that she should warn me cos its like I am trying to seduce him. My friend didn’t even ask me what happened, she just started raining insults on me,calling me a jealous bitch posing as a caring friend.

After all I did for these two people, they Bleep me over and throw me out like a piece of rag. What kind of friend’s are these? I would never have gotten involved but this man convinced me that he was over his wife and he is wiling to commit to me.

Like I said, I am 45 years old, I will not allow any body to use me just because …I broke up with him last month but discovered I am pregnant for him. I am scared, I do not know what to do but I want to have this child but the father may never claim him or her cos he says we cannot be together as a couple. He may never even consider sharing a child with me.

Maybe God gave me this child as a consolation. In 5 years, I will be 50. My own child will be born and raised by me. I dont want anything from my best friend or her ex husband but I feel there is need to tell the father …I am just scared of he will react.

Tell me: should I tell him or just quietly raise my own child and save myself from all the drama…my friend thinks I am trying to steal her ex husband, when he was the one who made me believe he was genuinely interested in me.

How will they react if they find out he’s the father of my child…a part of me is even afraid of keeping the child so I will not be seen as a betrayer….but what if I am never able to get married at my age or have a child again?

Please advice me, I need some guidiance on what to do and move forward.

Anonymous


Source: https://livelystones.ng/2021/12/24/true-life-story-my-best-friends-husband-lied-and-used-me-against-my-best-friend/