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Sheandi:
I met her in church. She seem decent, godly and respectful. She seem like one who wants to serve God (Which attracted me) but, hindered by survival. So, I tried to help and guide her to better life like a youth pastor would do but, she fell in love. Love beclouded her that she didn't even consider the solutions I was bringing for her and after much hell from her people, we got married. Marriage was a huge mess as she was never available whether emotionally, spirituly or even physically. She was so lost in her job that nothing else mattered in the whole of life. Even though I don't earn much, I could meet our needs alone. She seem agreeable and contented while we courted but, immediately we got married, she became someone else. she now wants the world, especially things we do not need. Although, I saw certain red flags while we courted like terrible lies, disrespect for elders, spendthrift, undue quietness, too busy and so on. But as marriage came in, she became a big mess with lots of concentrated and baseless lies, uncultured or unethical hardworking and hard life, infidelity, stealing from work, disregard for the things of God, disregard for time, no time for self, husband or even children. It was so bad I had to be carrying 2 months old baby about as she dumped her on me the moment her maternity leave was over. I forgot to mention that she works a shift job and she does night like 3 or 4 times a week. She works on Sundays to, so she hardly comes to church. It was so bad I have to carry baby to her at work for breastfeeding. I did everything possible to get her another job or business but she frustrated it. She later became very toxic and harmful and she has the backing of her people who I believe wants to ruin her and she does not know or maybe she does not care.
In the midst of all these trouble, I was still loving her like the only woman in the world, while she treats me like shit, locks me outside, wont cook or clean the house, became very disrespectful and insubordinate.
If you think I didn't try please let me know. I tried to calm her and seek an amicable way to resolve things but she kept pushing me away till I no longer feel safe with her. It became scary eating her food or sleeping in this same room as I learnt an adulterous woman will either kill her husband or herself. And since she's enjoying her infidelity, she might kill me, so i excused myself for some days hoping when i return she would feel some remorse and we would resolve things but I was wrong. She wanted me out of the house and her life the night I returned. In the process of the short fracas, she started rough handling me and I hard to spank her to calm the situation but to my surprise, she ran inside the room, I thought she was going to throw my things out or pick something to injure me but she came out with an obvious wound on her forehead, claiming I tried stab her and before you know it, I was in the police cell headed for prison. Luckily for me, God reveals all that she did or was planning. So, I got revelations from men of God of how she wants to send me to prison with the help of her people.
My concern now is, how do I help the children out of her grip and how do I help someone who is in love with her demons delivered. I don't encourage divorce. As a matter of fact I'm a happy-marriage crusader. And haven been separate for 3 years now, I can't see any remorse or repentance in her.
Children are still young, 6 years old boy, 4 years old boy and 3 years old girl. None of her family as showed any concern and she has so much despised my own family and the church. I recently found out she has strong narcissistic traits. My possible flaws or error as no man is perfect; my income is small but can cater for us; I may be too God minded for her liking; I so much want us to progress together and she wants to walk alone; I send not sufficient upkeep for children based on my current financial status; I want to raise a godly family but she wants us to be an anyhow family; while trying to love her more, she's continually wicked to me. During festive period one year, I wanted to surprise her with a car and was putting the car in order while my wife was busy preparing to send me to prison. I'm a dropout, she has a masters; I'm a moralist but, she wants to be with dreads, sagging and maybe smokers. But if you meet her, she be like Jesus' younger sister.
What do you advice I do friends ?
I'm sorry it's long experience of about 7 years. Too much to write

Do not allow anyone talk down on you or blame you brother. All you wanted was a loving home and a good wife.

Unfortunately, you married a bad woman!

A good woman even if she has a PhD and the husband is a drop out would still respect her husband. She might be a PhD in academics but you also have PhD in survival too! Is it easy to be a man in this part of the world?

Let me tell you, woman are designed by God to draw blessings to men if they are pure. That's why the Bible says he who finds a wife material has found a good thing for through serving as a conduit to the throne of blessings and grace, you would always be blessed.

You married her and you were not blessed to the level where you are happy and successful, instead it has been struggle and emotional pain and you can't smell the coffin? How can she even be pure with the kind of company she keeps and her narcissistic tendency which if well investigated spiritually borders on an evil spirit influencing her to be like that.

If you really still love her, then you would need to seek Spiritual help . If they tell you that she can't be helped, then leave her. Work harder , increase your income and get your kids under your custody as it is obvious that she would not be able to take care of them well even though her ego won't let go.

Most men who have Messiah tendencies are good men, that's why Satan also targets them .

Be strong and wise. Seek God's help through a genuine servant of God for revelation, direction , power and protection. You will need them all to fight this battle.

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