Onyenso100:
dear you have a good storyline but there are many things you aren't doing right. first you started very well with your little description of your first few characters then you started importing characters without description. sister not all nairalanders can read in between the lines and understand who they are so stop importing characters all of a sudden and when you do always simplify them for your fans by describing your relationship with them for better understanding. sorry to say this but your first few updates and episodes are disjointed, it is not structured, you omit stating settings or places of event, I couldn't make out if some parts of the were present or flashbacks, in the starting of every story you have to give your fans some good stuff, something that would glue their interest to the story that would make them stay awake waiting for your updates. ok let's say you give them something like a short description of a character let say papa p how his life before or after having kids or Pamela came to stay grandma and conditions that Lead to that continue flowing in that fashion till you get fans on your side before you started introducing disjointed episodes to hype and promote suspense.

lastly punctuation should be properly observed, emotionality were Necessary should be deepened. you have read my story PAINS OF LOVING A STAR it started with fancy and Jenny it letter deviated to Sarah and Morgan all in the same story so what am saying is deviate sometime from the main story to some others storyline to hype your fans but don't go too far you can start by steady giving them at intervals flashbacks of what Pamela's life was living with her grandma or anything just hype up your fans get them interested in your story.


good work so far keep bringing this thread down with good updates

can I rewrite your first few lines to sho you what I mean

orisunmi:
No update today again OK ooo

UPDATE VIGIL HOLDS TODAY!! three complete chapter updates today from 8pm to 5am you don't want to miss it

dear you have a good storyline but there are many things you aren't doing right. first you started very well with your little description of your first few characters then you started importing characters without description. sister not all nairalanders can read in between the lines and understand who they are so stop importing characters all of a sudden and when you do always simplify them for your fans by describing your relationship with them for better understanding. sorry to say this but your first few updates and episodes are disjointed, it is not structured, you omit stating settings or places of event, I couldn't make out if some parts of the were present or flashbacks, in the starting of every story you have to give your fans some good stuff, something that would glue their interest to the story that would make them stay awake waiting for your updates. ok let's say you give them something like a short description of a character let say papa p how his life before or after having kids or Pamela came to stay grandma and conditions that Lead to that continue flowing in that fashion till you get fans on your side before you started introducing disjointed episodes to hype and promote suspense.

lastly punctuation should be properly observed, emotionality were Necessary should be deepened. you have read my story PAINS OF LOVING A STAR it started with fancy and Jenny it letter deviated to Sarah and Morgan all in the same story so what am saying is deviate sometime from the main story to some others storyline to hype your fans but don't go too far you can start by steady giving them at intervals flashbacks of what Pamela's life was living with her grandma or anything just hype up your fans get them interested in your story.


good work so far keep bringing this thread down with good updates

dasilver20:
Onyenso100 u are simply awsome bt me i nid ya help o read my story crossroads and point out my mistakes thanks dear Onyenso100 u are simply awsome bt me i nid ya help o read my story crossroads and point out my mistakes thanks dear

ok let me go through it

CHAPTER 34

I didn't know what to do, I wanted so much to jump up from this Godforsaken bed and hug her so tight hat she might suffocate. I have missed her so much But seeing her like this broke my heart. Knowing that she was always this hot temperament girl even through hard times she always display this carefree face. But now all I see are the pains she was experiencing but trying to hid with the smile she was flashing as she walked towards me. I opened my mouth to talk but only bubbles of air blocked my air pipe, all I could do was stare as she walked up to me and sat on a stool by my bed.

SARAH: is that a proper way to greet a sister you haven't seen in three good months.

I tried to force open my mouth and say something but the lips were inseparable. But a smile replaced the supposed speech. As if Sarah knew I was battling with what to say she still came to my recuse
SARAH: ( placed her hands on my arm) ease up girl am okay. No need to worry about me.

Immediately I ignore the pain and forced myself up and held her in an embrace. The tears I was trying so hard to hold back started falling but it was accompanied with laughter.
ME: I missed you.
SARAH: the next time you get kidnapped believe you are going to come back to met my dead body.
ME: (loosen my grip and let her go as i gave her this weird look ) God forbid! ! I would never loss you
SARAH: then just never get kidnapped again. Never no matter what you have to do to prevent it.
She kept blabbing and blabbing but I was no longer focusing on what she was saying. My eyes were becoming heavy and I started feeling dizzy. Gradually I started losing it and I laid back on the bed as sleep got the best of me. I guess the injection given to me not long ago had some kind of sleep drug in them. I tried to keep my eyes open as if Sarah might disappear from me if I close my eyes to sleep for even a second. But gradually her voice became deeper and further for my hearing as I finally lost it and fell into a deep sleep.

________________________________________________
The stylish doctor was by my side when I woke from my sleep. He was checking and examining I don't know what on me. He smiled as he Saw that I had woken.

DOCTOR: you took forever to wake. But thank God you are repercurating faster than I even imagined.
ME: (I smiled as I stared at his young handsome face) thank Goes cause I can't wait to go home.
DOCTOR: (put down some tools he had been holding as he pressed down the in-need button which was by the top left hand side of my bed.) I guess you must be hungry. I will call the nurse to get you something.
ME: I am really famished and would really love to have something to eat.
VOICE: there wouldn't be any need for that your food supply agency has arrived.

We both turned to see victor who just walked in holding a nylon bag probably containing food. DOCTOR: guess I then just take my leave.
VICTOR: (shake hands with him) thanks for caring for her,I own you big time.
DOCTOR: (smiled) stop it we have been friends like forever it the least I can do. Besides she my patient.

He stared at me then victor smiled before leaving. I smiled as I stared at victor put down the nylon and brought out the take away plate with the inscription FANTASTIC MEALS AND CATERING SERVICES. He was becoming more and more of a darling everyday. It made wonder in the past why I have never seen this part of him. He opened the plate and put a spoon into it and brought it close to my bed. I lean up took the food with my left hand and tried to use the right to eat but a sharp pain re-informed of my injury. Immediately I groaned victor rushed and took the food plate from me.

VICTOR: don't stress your arm lets you tear open your wounds. I would feed you.
ME : (I felt shy) no don't I would try to eat by myself.

He ignored me as a spoonful of rice was already waiting in front of my mouth. I had no alternative than to open my mouth as he started feeding and petting me like a baby calling me all manner of pet names. While I was still chewing the food in my mouth, He took the television remote and on the tv. He put on CNN but after sometime he changed it to trendhit. Before long it was entertainment news, and the first news was how fans protested in front of LYRICAL MONSTER MUSIC building over fancy's cancellation of his local universities and polytechnic YOUTH WITHOUT LIMIT TOUR after a non refundable tickets had been sold out on the different venue of performance. Yet no news nor statement was released as to why. But without been told I knew why and it started making feel bad in a kind of way. Believe me when I tell you, It very difficult loving someone who's heart belongs to another Cause no matter how nice you treat and care for them they might only see you as friend and nothing more. Victor might have noticed the change in countenance so he switched off the tv and continued feeding me I outermost silence.

Twinkle004:
Onyenso100 u are finally back, welcome & hope u won't disappear again?

did I disappear b4

my schedule is not what it use to be. it has become tighter than ever so that is why I don't update often. and for that am really sorry. but believe me when I say I must surely make it up to you guys just have the same faith you always have in me.


NEXT CHAPTER DROPPING SOON.!!

CHAPTER 33
after Francis left, Victor came toward me smiling like a love drunk person but his eyes ganged up with his face to betray him. They were telling a different story. A story of a guy who is jealous.
He walked up to me, sat by the side of my bed smiled and then placed the flowers on the bed by side "thank you for making it through and staying alive " he said. I turned and looked into his eyes there i saw innocency and love . I wanted to say something but didn't know the words to say . Tears started rolling down my face again. what did I do to deserve being loved by the same guy who I had turned down a couple of time.

ME: (I finally spoke amidst the tears in my eyes) you have done what my own family couldn't do for me. I have nothing or no one, am a nobody, so how can I ever repay all this love and care you ha....
VICTOR: (place a finger on my lips) shii!!!, don't ever say that again. You are someone. Someone with a dream. And you have people, you Have your mum, you have Sarah and of course iam always here for you. You will always have me to look out for you. All I want as my pay is for you to recover first. There is no better payment for me than for you to get better, go back to school, study hard and graduate with a good results.
ME: once again thank you
VICTOR: (brought a handkerchief from his pocket and clean the tears off my face) there is another payment I want. And this time it is big a payment.And in this your always fibble nature it might be hard to pay up
ME: (let out a little laughter and then gave him an inquisitive look) what is it this time.
VICTOR: ( he laughed too as he took my palm in his fonding it affectionately ) I don't want to ever see tears in your eyes again. When you feel the urge to cry and throw a tadom just know you owl me not to cry anymore and fight it.
ME: I will try
VICTOR: no promise me.
ME: (I looked at him and once again smiled) ok I promise you I would cry no more ( I let out a little laughter again)
VICTOR: (raised my palm and kiss the back of it) okay why not be a good girl, ly down and get some good and quality bed rest you have talked enough. I want to go and see the doctor.

He got up and headed out, getting to the door he held the door handle, turned and opened it then turned back, looked at me and let out such a beautiful smile I never knew he had in him then left. Right there and then I knew I had a difficult decision to make. Who would it be, fancy who I had love and couldn't do without or victor who I have started developing deep feelings for. I have heard of the word" LOVE TRIANGLE" in the past but had laughed it off as something that is brewed out of foolishness and ignorance. From the look of things I have fallen into this big well of love triangle and if I don't handle it carefully and intelligently I might end up destroying my life or someone else's life and I wouldn't want either for the rest of my life. Judging from how victor normally jump into any of my problems I see him as someone who wouldn't let go easily at least not Without a big fight. And on the other side fancy never back down on a struggle for something. He has this possessive nature, love or no love, he would like to win me over just to add me like an award in his chains of awards as someone who can not be beaten. Only these thoughts occupied my head until the nurse came in to give me my five-hourly drugs. She gave me some injection on my arm and some pill to take. My eyes were darting about and steadily glancing towards the door.
NURSE: ( while removing the empty drip pack and it tube from my arm) husband, brother, or boyfriend?
ME: (looked at her) what? Oh he is my girlfriend's brother.
NURSE: (stared for a moment at me as if I was lying) really.
ME: yeah.
NURSE: the way he was worried and cared for you when you were first brought here I thought...
ME: (cut her short before she could say more) no he is not any of those you think to me. He is just naturally caring so be it anyone he would do the same. It just in his nature to be caring.
NURSE: I highly doubt that. I know am not an expect when it comes to relationships but when I see look I can tell. That guy more than love's you. ME: ( I laughed out a little) how can you tell, did you study psychology or sociology.
NURSE: no I didn't but I have been around a little so believe me I know the difference.

We both started laughing and then bang!!! The door flew opened and my face instantly turned from that of a laughter to soar. I wanted to shed tears when I remembered my promise to victor I fought it. All I did was stay still and looked at who entered.

I go try make am twice a day.

shotunz:
nice story onyenso....buh ur updates are quite slow. ....plz make it regular

okay I would try to update even it once a day just hang on

CHAPTER 32

I was surprised when I woke up and saw him. He was sitting by my side on the bed,leaning against me I guess trying to calm me from the bad dream I was having. hey is alright, calm down it's just a dream.he said. I once again heard his melodious voice I had come to miss so much. I just stared at him as those caring words kept falling from his mouth.this time around I had mixed feeling. A great part of me still loved and clamour for him but the other part was telling me to stay off him cause since he came into my life, my peace has gone on exile, my privacy is under scrotone, my education has become an abandoned project. worst of all my once bright future has turned gloomy. People once said that love is a beautiful thing but to me it has been suicidal.

ME: (I managed to speak in a small shaky voice) Francis what are you doing here.
FANCY: (he stared at me with a query eyes) am really sorry I wasn't there for you when you needed me the most. I only discovered that you were in this hospital yesterday after searching for a long time for me.
ME: (angry but didn't know if it was at him or this cruel bedridden life I now have. One could sense it in my voice) you were searching for me?
FANCY: yea. I went to your hostel twice to check on you but never met you, I tried calling your line it didn't go through. At first I thought you travelled home so I didn't think much of it. Not until school reopened last month and I couldn't find you then I started asking around that was when they told me everything that has happened, so I started searching everywhere for you. You wouldn't believe if I tell you the extent I went in searching for you.
ME: really?
FANCY: yeah.
ME: (I spoke sober look and voice) Francis I don't want US to be meeting again. Infact I want us to go back to when we never knew each other.
FANCY: ( he ignored me as if he didn't hear a thing I said) am so happy you are now safe, And getting better. So don't worry about you, I and this thing between us when you get better we will have that discussion.
ME: no after today I wouldn't want to see you .
FRANCIS: ( his facial countenance change) I know I wasn't there for you when you needed me the most cause it took me long and you so much pain for me to really know how much you meant to me . But I promise from here out if given another chance I make up for all my lackings and treat you the way even queen Elizabeth haven't been treated all her life.
ME I smiled as hot tears ran down my face. I knew he was trying to relief the atmospheric tension in the room with his joke.)I can't do this anymore. It too painful. I have lot so much and might keep losing if am with you. Please erase me from your life as I would try to go back to the lonely shy girl I was before I met you.
FANCY: do you think this is the easy way out .You think being in love is painful but once you have tried being alone you would know the difference. Am sorry I can't erase you from my life,there is nothing to erase cause you are my life itself. So all I ask is just a second chance to makeup all my wrongs.
ME: ( tears started dropping uncontrollably from my eyes as I watched his lips move and his melodious voice caress through me. But I had to fight this feelings I was feeling in my heart for reasons I couldn't even fathom) Francis I love you .Yeah I have never felt for any guy the way I feel when am next to you. It tears me inside out to be wanting for us to say our goodbyes almost as soon as I met and fell in love with you. But too much has already gone wrong with us just being friends. I can't, I just can't. Please leave now and never appear in front of me again.( He was about to open his mouth to say another thing but I cut him short of those words) Francis am struggling while saying this words so please don't make this harder for me than it has to be. Please let me go first.
FRANCIS: ( he got up and stood as we looked each other into the eyes. He was staring as if he was searching for reasons why I was doing what I was doing) if that is what you want . You have being through a lot so I understand why you want to stay away from me. I will leave right now but please do have a rethink. I love you and it is for real reminisce over this words till we met again. He got up and started leaving. When he got to the door he bumped on Victor who was rushing in with a bouquet of flowers in his hand. Seeing each other they exchanged a daring stare than fancy stared back to were i laid. I knew right there and then that a new war was budding and I have to caught this bud now it is still small cause knowing the personality of those two who live in an ocean of wealth it won't end well for them and for me and this miserable thing i called life that i have right now.

CHAPTER 31

I couldn't see clearly. My head aches like someone who has had the worst hangover. I gradually blinked my eyes. At first I thought I was in corridor of after life . I saw two people wearing white I couldn't make out who they were cause of my dizziness and shallow sight.they were talking but it sounded like they were whispering cause I couldn't her a thing and their voice were sounding as if they were far away in my head . I could hear the beeping of a machine, An oxygen mask was attached to my nose, a wire-like thread to my hand.Then it done on me that I wasn't in heaven and they weren't angels but health practitioners. One of them left leaving one behind who was touching me and doing I don't what on me and writing it down . I tried to move in attempt to remove the oxygen mask, I felt a Sharp pain by my side then I Groaned which attracted the attention of the nurse who had being touching me.

NURSE: (smiled) ooh you are awake, thank God. Let me call the doctor I would be back in few seconds.

She left I once again tried to get up but the pain was unbearable. What was happening to me. Have I become bedridden for life, I started remembering how I came to be here today. Tears started flowing from my eyes. If I couldn't walk again for life then what good was I been alive. My mum had suffered enough already so being a liability to her all my life was something I wouldn't want. I was in the mist of my thoughts when the nurse came back. She saw the tears in my eyes, she left her book on a small bed side stool near my bed.

NURSE: (held me in her arms) dear what is the problem. Why are you crying.
ME: (in a little shaky voice)what happened to me. Why can't I get up.
NURSE: you were rushed here unconscious. Some one shot you. You have been in coma for the past two weeks. We almost lost you cause you lost a lot of blood. You been here is a miracle, not everyone who lost the kind of blood you did lived to hear the story of what happened to them.so you should be thanking God not crying (pulled a handkerchief from her gown and wiped my face)
ME: (looked at her Face with more tears running down my face) would I walk again.
NURSE: ( she smiled) the bullet almost hit you spinal cord but stop just two meters to it.you were really Lucky so you definitely walk again. So wipe your tears I wouldn't want the doctor to walk in here and see this tears. He won't be happy about it.

Almost immediately the doctor came, I was surprised how such a handsome young guy who had Dreid lock on his hair could be the doctor. He was too young, and stylish for a doctor.
DOCTOR: (he smiled as he walked up to me) Good afternoon miss. You finally woke up. Thank God. How are you feeling
ME: (placed one palm on my forehead) I feel a server headache, am weak and dizzy.
DOCTOR: it is expected.you are a strong lady who went through a lot to keel the life she is having right now. (He took the nurse note and started writing while still talking to me) Anyway I would recommend you to some drugs be brought to you. If you relax and have a good bed rest you might be leaving here before the month runs out.

He gave the nurse back the not. Get her some aspin for the headache and when the drip is done start giving her this drugs every five hours. He left and she nurse looked at me and smiled before going to get me my aspin. I was feeling too dizzy so I slept off before she came back.
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
Fancy: I can no longer be with you. Ever since I met you it been one trouble or the other.
ME: ( tears rolled down my face) Francis place please don't do this to me. Look at all I have been through but I don't regret meeting you because I love you.
FANCY: you love who?. don't ever love me. Your love brings nothing but bad luck. I can hardly get my song on the chart because I met you, Osarenweinda is dead today because I met you. My life have become miserable because I met you so don't ever let me hear you say you love me never again. Why am I even here talking to you.

He started walking out of the room. I went down on my knees, held one of his leg with tears overflowing from my eyes.
Please don't do this to me. I don't have a life without you in it. He forced his leg off my hold and started walking out. I wept and wept until someone touched me then I woke from my sleep and saw him sitting on the bed by my side.

Was this update lengthy to your desire want your feed backs[s][/s]

CHAPTER 30

I was right it was been driven by OSARENWEINDA carrying the gang members.

OSARENWEINDA: ( She was surprised when she saw me as She walked up to were I laid) So you tink you can run away from me bit*ch.Where were this fool when this happened. Take her to the car she baked at the other gang members with her.
ME: (I continued crying )please OSARENWEINDA have mercy on me. Or just kill me now. I can't go on like this.
OSARENWEINDA: (let out the most wicked type of laughter I have ever heard) so you are now ready to leave fancy and take the easy way out. Nah death is a luxury I can't allow you to enjoy now. Take her back to the car.
ME: please have on poor me.!!
OSARENWEINDA: i warned gently to leave fancy but you refused and formed hard nut to crack, your friend even fought me,My brother took you side. Now where are they now to save you from my wrath. And by the way where are all those you hard talks"he would never love you the way he loved me huh.!!" I guess you can't talk bold again right. Stupid bit*ch (she baked) move it!!.

God works in a mysterious way. He answer prayer when you think all hope is gone and you have no one to turn to. He proved himself in my case again. I had lot my faith and any hope of making anything out of this life all I wanted was to give and die.
I was being dragged to the car when something terrific happened to me. I was about being thrown into the car when we heard voices. Freeze!!! Put your hands over your heads. And stand right where you are. Any funny movement you are down. I turned and waves of joy wash me ashore. I couldn't believe who I saw. Victor was standing in front. But I didn't see him like the victor who was wooing me but as a God and a messiah. The guys holding me left my hands and raised theirs to the air. I raced over to where victor stood and almost collapsed on him in attempt to embrace him. He caught me,removed his jacket and put it on my much exposed body then held me close to himself in an embrace. I lean my head on his shoulder as hot tears kept following forming from my eyes.

OSARENWEINDA: (walked up boldly to where the police men stood without even bothering to raise her hands) who are you guys and what are you doing here. Do you know this is a private property and as such I can charge you for trespassing.
POLICE MAN: ( pulled an I'D card from from his pocket ) am dectative Collins and you are under arrest for attempted murder, kidnapping and unlawful holding. You are advised to remain silent cause anything you do or say would be you against you In a law court.
OSARENWEINDA: ( pulled out her phone) this is bull shirt. I need to talk to my lawyer.

The police man took the phone away from her and cuffed her. One of the gang member tried to take off and run but was shot instantly. They cuffed the rest and moved them into the police van. I Joined victor in his as we drove to where I was held in captivity. It was traumatic for me going back there. ME: ( leaned my head on the the head rest in the car) what of Sarah.where is she.
VICTOR: she was shot.
ME: (turned with this sharp worried look on my face) oh my God. Where is she, how is is she, oh my God. Take me to here this minute.
VICTOR: ( put his other hand on my) relax she is getting better now. No need to get worked up. You have been through a lot in the past 3 months you have to cool down so not to have any mental, physiological or medical break down.

ME: ( relaxed a bit and spoke with a shaky weak voice) how did you find me.
VICTOR: ( let out a little smile) before I gave Sarah that car I had a car tracking device installed on it. I knew my sister like bit*ching around so I did it to watch her every move. when they called me about Sarah being shot. At first I thought it was robbers. So I started tracking the car to this location but after some days it disappeared on the raider. So I had no way to find you until Sarah woke up a few weeks ago to tell me everything that was going on. So I started watching osarenweinda closely, watching her every moves.

The police car came to an instant Halt and we stop right behind them. They signal us to remain right in the car. As they moved into the building in a full fronted assault. In a minute they were out carrying too bodies. We came down from the car. It was ITSEZGY and his gang leader. the police told us that they were both dead when they saw them. The place was scattered so they' might as well both committed homicide on each other. I was touched when I saw ITSEZGY. Truth be told he was dead now because of me, Just to protect me. I moved to where he laid squatted in front of him and whispered thank you. I knew the victor might have been surprise by my action and the police might think I was losing it, but i didn't care. ITSEZGY was my saviour in his own little way. I learned to like him even though I never under stood why a gentle and kind guy like him would be part of this ruthless gang of cultists.I got up as we got to leave this God forsaken place. Then Something bad happened.
I never knew why I was drawn to bad things and ill luck since I was a child. Anytime something good happens to me, another bad one comes up to spoil all the other good ones.
We were heading to the car when osarenweinda pulled a pistol from a police man's side. We were all startled so tried to negotiate with her. If I cant have have fancy no one would, Not even her. She shot at me and I fell. The little blood I had left in my body started rushing out. Instantly she was shot by the police men to avoid more homicides. Victor race over to where I laid And lifted me as he started racing over to his car with me in his hands. You could see traces of tears in his eyes no not you again. I looked up and saw his face. I could now see how much he loves me now. With my bloody shaky hand I touched his face. He dropped me on the passager side and screeched off on a full speed. I had already lost a lot of blood and was getting weak, my eyes were dimming, I could see my end near. I began thinking of my mum, crazy friend Sarah and all the crazy stuff we did and thing I never got to try. I turned my eyes and looked at Victor and felt sorry for him loving a complex girl like me.
ME: (with the last strength I had) thank you for all you have done for me and for caring for a poor girl like me.
VICTOR: ( turned to me,the tears in his eyes were now so visible) Thank me when you are well. For now stop talking and save your strength, you would need all of it
ME: (i could see my end near and could hear voices in my head so with a shaky and weaker voice) am too tiered, I don't think I would make it. Please thank Sarah for me. Tell her I love her so much.
VICTOR: ( held one of my hand with his. now tears was dropping from his eyes.I never seen any grown up cry like that in my who life ) shii, don't say that. You are gonna make it and you go back to school and you will see Sarah and tell her how much you love her.

I was blacking out but I could still hear his voice finally I lost it and became unconscious of all around me. I wasn't part of this world again as I breath my last.

Chapter 30 about to drop

Happy new year to you all

Am finally back fulltime to start were I stopped. Expect more and longer updates cause I a new phone without words limitations

CHAPTER 29

i wanted so much to scream but my throat was dried. Tears had long stopped flowing my eyes as they had shielded so much so they are tired of shielding more. Even the strength to fight him off was no longer there. I was just empty and defenceless left at his mercy. He pushed me and I falled hard to the ground as I watched him make a move to get on top of me. For me I wasn't shocked cause I had already surrendered to anything fate had in store for me here. So rape was least of my worries now.

ME: please stop this. Am sorry if I was disturbing you with my song.
GANGLEADER: no! I like that you are having fun.Why cant I join you and have fun.(pulled his shirt & made to come to me)
ME: (now crying even though tears refused coming out) please don't do this to me, I beg you in the name of God.
ITSEZGY: ( just when he was almost unto me, itsezgy became my saving grace. Held his arm and pulled him back.) Capoo I sure say madam no go like wethin you wan do now.
GANGLEADER: (turned to him angrily) and who you come be to tell me wetin madam go like and wetin she no go like. Come oo!! Na because me and you Don dey shine teeth you no come know how to pay your ASALAM MALECU
ITSEZGY: Capoo no be like that.
GANGLEADER: then na like how. Before I close my eyes open am, you don disappear from this bunk.

He hesitated then slowly walked out. The gang leader came unto me and held me Down to the ground and tried to put his smelling mouth and lips on mine. I throw away my face and dodged his blackened lips. With a little strength I had I tried fighting him off and screaming on top of my voices.
ME : please stop this. I beg you in the names of everything you hold dear.
GANG LEADER: (let out a wicked type of laughter ) shut up,This small ashawo . I go Bleep this your fine toto today tire. He held the button of my trouser and pulled hard on it tearing them away with my trouser. I held the shred of my clothing to my body still trying to cover it. He kept pulling away the shreds from my body. I screamed and screamed but it fell on deaf ears. I pleaded and pleaded but her didnt pay any of my p
lead any attention. Just when my strength was giving way and he was almost having his way on me. ITSEZGY walked in with a kind of boldness And alacrity I had never seen in him before now. He pulled him of me with this mean look in his eyes.

ITSEZGY: capoo i no gree for this thing you wan do now cha chaa.
GANGLEADER: ( with and utmost surprise) wetin you do now now. You dey craze.
He punched his face and a tremble fight ensued. Immediately a little strength came again, I picked up my shreds of clothes that I could find and quietly open the door and ran out leaving the poor fools to fight till their heartfelt. I was outside but all I could see was bushes around me. The place I was held was no doubt an abandone warehouse. Without thinking I ran off not knowing where I was running to. All I wanted was to escape this captivity. To be a free person again. I ran and ran, even though my leg were weak and my strength was giving way. I had to push on. I had bearly ran a few kilometers away from my captor when like magic my strength gave way. I felled to the ground and started breathing fast. My eyes were dimming I tried to get up but it seem my leg were no long part of my body.was this diabolical was God trying to punish me for departing from the way I was brought up . I started crying again praying to God to have pity on this sinfully soul of my and save me. I had bearly finished the prayer when the once Sarah's car the one I was kidnapped in came driving in from a distance i knew it was either OSARENWEINDA or the other gangmember who left earlier to God knows where . I tried to get up and run into the Bush but my legs refused to carry me. I finally let out a prayer of frustration. Oh God if you can't forgive and save me this one time please take away my life. Am too tired to go back there and be tormented like this again let along continue living like this. I cried and cried as I watched the car approach to were I was. Please have mercy on poor me, see my suffering and take away my life now. I laid flat on the ground closed my eye cried and was waiting for my wishes to come through I no longer cared about anything, I was ready for the worst .I was still in my expectation of an answered prayer when the car came to my spot and applied an automatic brake and came to halt. My worst fear came through.

CHAPTER 28


today makes it complete six weeks I was adopted and held in captivity. i haven't taken my bath neither have I had a change of clothes. osarenwienda always report to duty everyday to tell me how slowly and painfully my death was going to be. I have cried a river of tears but nothing changed,I have prayed but it looked like heavens shut their doors against me. the pain and torment was too much that I was giving up and was praying for God to console my mum if anything should happen to me at anytime and for him to keep Sarah a live for me. but in life never give up and never doubts God's ability to answer prayers. just when I was about giving up something happen and confusion set in. at first i thought i was going to be violated but god use it as a stepping stone to make name for him self.

itsegy and his gang member who happens to be the gang leader were sitting inside the room where I was kept gambling and smoking away their life. from the look of things the gang leader was losing money. while itsegy was happy making all manner of noise. I was sitted and singing sorrowful song about my life and its journey to it present situation.

********some of the lyrics of my song*************

where will I go
what will i do
when the world seems to be against me.
who will I tell
who will know how I feel
when everything seems hopeless for me.

I was deep into my song when the gang leader screamed at me. will you shut up you bitc**h,do you think here is a church. he left his sit and walked towards me with this mean look. he came to where i sat and squat in front of me and smiled. I knew something dirty was going his mind because of the way he smiled at me. he held my shirt and tore it exposing my youthful and beautiful but body.

back again with fresh ideas, a new phone and more time to spare so let get. rolling

thanks to all those that drop their comment. kip it coming guyz

CHAPTER 27 UPDATE

Her facial expression changed the moment she heard this. Immediately she hit my mouth me with the botton of the pistol gun. I fell to the floor,blood started gushing out of my mouth.

OSARENWIENDA: i like you. Your boldness is intriguing. In a different situation you and i would have been good friends.
ME: then please let me go. i promise i wont tell anyone about this. infact this never happened,i went home to be with my mum for a while.
OSARENWIENDA: (gave out that type of devilish laughter again) you misunderstood my friendliness deary. let me tell you this. There is no leaving here for you atleast not alive. You are right now because i want you to live for sometime with the fear that i might take you life the next minute.
ME: (sobbing deeply) please let me go. I promise never to even hold francis in my heart again.
OSARENWIENDA: (stood up,gave her gun to ITSEGZY who came in from outside) too last.I warned you gentlely earlier. Bt you refuse to heed it.now take that your love to yr grave

CHAPTER 27 UPDATE

She moved a little backward, then pulled a gun from her handbag. I frozed at the sight of the exact type of gun in my dream. She then walked up to me, squated infront of me and started waving my hair backward gentlely and more friendly with her right palm while still holding the gun with the other one.

ME: (fling my head to remove her hand) dont touch me!!
OSARENWIENDA: (made a sound with her tongue) tck! Tck!! Tckk!!! I wouldnt do that if i were you. (raised the gun up for me to see) You see,right now your life is in my hand,i can decied to take it right away or let you live.well that depend on the mood you leave me in.
ME: (bursted into tears) what did i ever did to you to deserve this.
OSARENWIENDA: (gave out the most devilish laughter i have ever seen in my whole life) i warn you about de preditor loking around in the dark.(bring de gun closer to her nose as if smelling it)now deary who actual won.
ME: (boldly) no matter what you do francis would never love you de way he did me.

CHAPTER 27

I woke up on the ground where i was being tied up,trembling with fear. I didnt know how long i have slept,infact ever since i was kidnapped i have lost track of time.
It took my eyes a little time to adjust to the dark surrounding.but i took instant notice of a figure sitting by the cooner of the building smoking. I couldnt make out the face but i could tell it was a lady."Gud evening your royal magesty,hope you enjoyed your sleep" the figure said. I strained my eyes to make out the face but couldnt. Then the figure got up and open up the preivous small spolt window allowing a little light in.i then saw her face. An unfathomed anger engulfed me. if i had my way i would have bound on her and tear her apart for making me go through hell for the past three days. but i was helpless and left at her mercy.

ME: you again?
OSARENWIENDA: (laughed out loudly)yes deary we met again.i told you that you havent won yet didnt i?
ME: (tried to get up and go after her) you did this to me,you crazy bit**ch

CHAPTER 26 LAST UPDATE

OSARENWIENDA: crazy ideas you said. So i now believe in the crazies is that it.
FANCY: I never said that. Please can we just go past this. Lets return to being good friend
OSARENWIENDA: (chocked the gun) really? Well if i dont have you,no other lady will not even her.
FANCY: (tried to walk up to her) dont do dis to yourself. Quiet being in dis pain.

She release one shot to de floor fancy stood still where he was.you think am just messing around dont you. she den released one straight at me. It hitted me on my left chest part,i falled to de ground, fancy ran to me & used his hand to hold de blood overflowing from my body. she stood dere watching with no appologetic eyes as blood kept gushing out of my chest. she even pointed de gun at fancy when he tried carrying me to de car so we could go to de hospital. my blood have been rushing out for so long,i could see my end now,i touch fancy's face with my palm then breath my last.
Then i jumped up,it was just a dream but about 2 come through

CHAPTER 26 UPDATE
She pulled out a gun and pointed it straight at us.We could see the seriousness in her eyes,her alral smelt homcidal.
FANCY:What are you doing with that.
OSARENWIENDA: am i that invicible to you. Do you think i brought you her to kiss and sing some love poem to each other.
FANCY: you have made you point now keep that away.
OSARENWIENDA: (she fling the gun from me to him) dont ever talk while am still talking. Francis you think you can just toy with my emotion & then dump me.
FANCY: i never toyed with you,you were a good friends ever since we were kids and you are...
OSARENWIENDA: (bursted to tears as she cut him short) friends !!, friends you say!,Francis we were bethronend to be married and i have loved you all my life.
ME: (hiding) osarenwienda ,you are a good person please dont do this
OSARENWIENDA: (fliped the gun back back at me) shut up bit**ch
FANCY:i haved loved you as my best friend you know Dat.Am sorry our parents planted this crazy idea in you.You & i knews it wud hv ne

CHAPTER 26 UPDATE

I was worried over many things and have many question that havent met any answers. I just stayed still,waiting for what fate has in store for me.
Fancy walk in with Osarenwienda where i was held captive. When fancy saw me,he ran to me hugged me lefting me up from the ground and place his beautiful lips i love so much on mine and kissed me.

FANCY:Where i have you been for the past three day,i have been looking for you.
ME:Kidnappers tried to keep me away from you by taking me away and bringing me here.
FANCY: (smilied) they have failed. you belong with me forever even in death.just remember one when you are passing through a hard time because of me,just know you are not in it alone. i would alway be with you all the way.through the thick & thin cause i love you.
ME: (kissed his lips again & let my touge tangle with his) i love you too. so no matter what they say or do to me.you belong here(placing my palm on my chest)

we kissed again and was laughing when OSARENWIENE did the unimaginable

AM HOME TODAY THAT MEANS YOU GET TO READ TWO FULL CHAP TODAY

CHAPTER 26

It been three days, three of agony, three day of living in this darkness and lonely place.only The wait was killing me faster,i was living in fear of what might happen the next me. In those three, i was just tied up and dumped in room,no ransome have been demanded that i know of. i have heard them discussing about an unknow identity who masterminded my kidnap.in those three day no one came in or go out except the handsome guy who later introduced his name to me as ITZSEGY. even though he was my kidnapper, he was becoming uncommon friendly with me.he brought me my only food which was bread and water, he come in when everyone have gone out to chat with me.he was becoming more friendly to me by the day which made me my stay less hellish. it made wonder why he couldnt just let me go.i later knew why. in their cultism rank, he was a nobody,just a new recruit,just a follower of crowd.
I wonder were my mum was, what she might be doing and if she had any idea of what have happened to me. I was worried.

JUST GOT BACK CHAPTER 26 WOULD DROP SOON LET ME FRESHEN UP

PLEASE GUYS I HAVE TO BAIL SO I CAN GET SOME SLEEP. GOT WORK TOMOROW SO SEE YOU GUYS AS YOU WAIT 4 THE NEXT BOMB CHAPTER. SEE YA

CHAPTER 25 LAST UPDATE

I was then dragged out of the car still face covered. I still struggle to set free,but their power was far more than mine. So the over powered me and tied my hand together at my back and started dragging me into a hall like building. It felt deserted,one could even hear the sound of a needle that fall to the floor.
We continued walking down this hall like building and then i was being pushed into a room.
Once inside my face cover was removed,the place was dark and was illuminated by a small light shining in through a window that had spoil. It took time for my eyes to adjust to the little light in the room. Then i saw the face of two of my kidnapper, one was bloodly handsome with a great clothing taste and the other was the direct opposite. He was a junior brother to a monkey,with unkept hair and bears,i tot he was a medical ambassador cause his face was advertisting different kinds of wound and surgecal stitches,if you see his brutal physic,you go know say OBJ dey learn work 4 WOWO.