Hey guys. Created this new account to hide my identity.
I will make this as brief as possible.

I am 29. Mom told me in the the middle of a serious conversation that my late father is not my biological father.
She said my biological father threw her out when she was pregnant. She met my father (Forster) when I was a year. She said my Forster father adopted me and changed my name.
Right now I am confused. My life is like a nollywood script.
I discussed it with my fiancee but she said I should let it slide. If my biological father didn't care about me since I was born, it means he doesn't want me but out of sheer curiosity, I want to see this man.
I am curiously confused. Please I need advice from you guys.

Your father is dead, The other one might the one who brought you to this world, but he ain't your father! Anyhow you want you should do but that's my own perspective.

Since he has never surfaced all this while to disturb your childhood... Just quit thinking about him.

You can't blame him, he probably doesn't believe you are his child due to one or two reasons. Remember mother's don't tell the full stories as it is

falcon01:
Your father is dead

my Forster father died when I was in primary school. I just want to know this man. Know the reason he behaved the way he did. His own version of the story. I am confused

Bluesea1and2:
Since he has never surfaced all this while to disturb your childhood... Just quit thinking about him.

You can't blame him, he probably doesn't believe you are his child due to one or two reasons. Remember mother's don't tell the full stories as it is

I am still fighting to knife the idea of going in search of him but it ain't easy

The things complicated, but it will sure be a can of worms waiting for you so prepare to swallow what you find or just let it remain a forgotten piece of your past.

If I were you, I will let it be, but unfortunately I am not.

Naitor:
my Forster father died when I was in primary school. I just want to know this man. Know the reason he behaved the way he did. His own version of the story. I am confused

are you sure you are ready to face the truth?

Naitor:
I am still fighting to knife the idea of going in search of him but it ain't easy

Your mum isn't telling you the entire truth why she got thrown out during pregnancy and another man took her in within a year.

You may regret hearing the truth from your true father and hate your mother for it forever. Just let the man be bro

falcon01:
are you sure you are ready to face the truth?

truth is I don't know

Some mothers are ...

Bluesea1and2:

Your mum isn't telling you the entire truth why she got thrown out during pregnancy and another man took her in within a year.

You may regret hearing the truth from your true father and hate your mother for it forever. Just let the man be bro

thanks man

duro4chang:
Some mothers are ...p

na. Not my mom

Yu're lucky to have a Man that accepted to adopt yu when he married ur Mom. Am sure this event took place in the 90s, yrs wey men no dey Simp around; unlike the generation of today wey family relative for don spit curse ontop ur head base on "BASTARD" title.. Egbor, if ur own biological Dad could care less of ur existance til date. Imagine tryin to convince him more to recognize yu as his SON..

You meeting your father will open the doors to a revelation that you might not be able to handle.

I advise that you check yourself very carefully, if you're not ready yet, wait until you're ready, capable enough to handle whatever information you might get, then seek out the truth.

But whatever the truth is, whoever it is that is at fault, your mother and father still remain your mother and father.

Honour them, so that you may be prosperous!

Naitor:
truth is I don't know

never know if you dont try, Just have it in Mind the worst case scenario he Never cared, he doesn't care he never loved your momma, you where a mistake He isn't happy to see you. How you gon feel about that?? If you can Eat that then I advice you to go look for your daddy.
P.S you can still ask your momma why so you could get an Idea of why it happened.

Daveambition:
Yu're lucky to have a Man that accepted to adopt yu when he married ur Mom. Am sure this event took place in the 90s, yrs wey men no dey Simp around; unlike the generation of today wey family relative for don spit curse ontop ur head base on "BASTARD" title.. Egbor, if ur own biological Dad could care less of ur existance til date. Imagine tryin to convince him more to recognize yu as his SON..

guess you are right. Thanks

3pleDAssistant:
You meeting your father will open the doors to a revelation that you might not be able to handle.

I advise that you check yourself very carefully, if you're not ready yet, wait until you're ready, capable enough to handle whatever information you might get, then seek out the truth.

But whatever the truth is, whoever it is that is at fault, your mother and father still remain your mother and father.

Honour them, so that you may be prosperous!

I used to dash out advice on this forum till I got here. Now I can't even advise myself. Guess I am not ready for the truth. Thanks

falcon01:
never know if you dont try, Just have it in Mind the worst case scenario he Never cared, he doesn't care he never loved your momma, you where a mistake He isn't happy to see you. How you gon feel about that?? If you can Eat that then I advice you to go look for your daddy.
P.S you can still ask your momma why so you could get an Idea of why it happened.

I plan asking my aunt about it. Mom said she has knowledge of the whole thing

Naitor:
my Forster father died when I was in primary school. I just want to know this man. Know the reason he behaved the way he did. His own version of the story. I am confused

Are you sure you're ready to hear what his reasons were?
It might mess you up. Think about it carefully...

The man who brought you in is your father.If I were you I will just live with that.
However,if curiousity is eating you up,you may go looking for your biological dad.However,it may open up a new life you may not appreciate at the end of it all.

mariahAngel:


Are you sure you're ready to hear what his reasons were?
It might mess you up. Think about it carefully...

I am trying. God knows I am trying

Naitor:
na. Not my mom

Not your mum now. I said some mothers.

Naitor:
I am trying. God knows I am trying

Whatever happens, whatever you find out, do not hate your mum.
She did her best for you regardless. Always remember that.

thorpido:
The man who brought you in is your father.If I were you I will just live with that.
However,if curiousity is eating you up,you may go looking for your biological dad.However,it may open up a new life you may not appreciate at the end of it all.

I wanted to go in search of him the very day I heard about it. My problem is just curiosity. I want to give it time, clear my head, seek advice before taking a decision.

mariahAngel:


Whatever happens, whatever you find out, do not hate your mum.
She did her best for you regardless. Always remember that.

I love my mom so much that I can't bring myself to hating her.

Naitor:
I love my mom so much that I can't bring myself to hating her.

I wish you all the best in your quest.

mariahAngel:


I wish you all the best in your quest.

thanks. Thanks very much.

Naitor:
my Forster father died when I was in primary school. I just want to know this man. Know the reason he behaved the way he did. His own version of the story. I am confused

Sorry about this shocking revelation... But honestly it's a relief and will heal alot of things that could have gone wrong in the future

Don't believe everything your mum told you about your biological father because women can generally be bias and sometimes be the one to hide you frm your dad just to get back at him... I'm saying this from experience

Do not hate your mum but try and use wisdom to know the truth

Another thing you shouldn't have informed your babe about it for now until you have found the truth

And again be calm about the issue and don't hate your mum for it... Ask questions and the lord will lead you

Shalom !!!

Biological one might be your father , but he ain't your daddy. Be grateful to the one that adopted you as his own cos the fact that you're just finding out about it proves he did a decent job in making sure you do not feel like you weren't his .

Some mothers are ...

Naitor:
I love my mom so much that I can't bring myself to hating her.

You don't need to hate her or have to, its just that what you will find out by searching your biological dad may change your perspective of your mum, probably your deceased foster dad and what you have always known as truth.

Hmmmm! Some course are better left uncharted! Some truth are better left unsearched! Some wounds are better left to heal naturally!

If the present man you knew to be your father has been there for you all these while, not discriminating between or amongst his children on who's his biological or not, then I'd say leave that man out there that hasn't traced you nor your mum all these while.

There are times we wish somethings were so to be, but how will you feel if your quest brings you into a new home where you may be seen by the matriach of that home as a threat to her own children's prospective heritage? Another fasting and prayer begins bah?

I'd say let the sleeping dog lie as your spouse and some nairalanders here advised. Fine, if Providence brings him along your path, if it doesn't, let him be!!

Shalom!