₦airaland Forum

cococandy:
Gambling is an actual disease that requires therapy. He will never change. Advice won’t change him. Prayers won’t change him. Nothing will.

So she’s better off on her own because one day he will borrow from ruthless loan sharks who will kidnap his family and sell them in parts to recoup their money. Gambling is one of the addictions with the highest rate of suicide amongst their addicts

Ungodly:
Reading this, I already gave up on the said husband… A chronic gambler? He’s a lost sheep bro… if your sister get weytin she wan use her life do make she just focus on herself and build herself up, I’d not advise she leave the marriage, why? Nobody really wan marry person wey don before o… if anyone on here convince you it’s a lie then I’m sorry.

1Rolake:
Please I need nairalanders advice. I'm in dilemma.

I'm sorry the story is long please take your time and sorry for any mistakes.

My sister and her husband got married late 2018, she was pregnant then.
Few months after their marriage the husband lost his job. He was sacked because he embezzled over 5m from his company.

Note: he dated my sister for only a year before their marriage and only bought a phone (infinix) for my sister during their courtship. He has no car nor a house from this money.

We got to know that he is a chronic gambler. He can bet 200k on a single game.

For 2 years he was out of job, my sister supported him and never complained, we also do not have problem in my family. We didn't even act as if we know that he was out of job for that 2yrs. After my sis gave birth the MIL stayed with them for a year with my sister footing the bills, the MIL eats only Amala every night and my sister covers every damn expenses and still cook for the house. She takes care of her family without complaints.

The problem is that the husband is never satisfy, never appreciate my sis for a day and always complain anytime she did not cook for those 2yrs. He has pushed my sister to collect loans of 40k twice from LAPO without paying back. He sold almost all the properties at home for betting, they have no TV, nor fridge.

In late 2021 he got a job in a restaurant with a salary of 80k and he promised to be given my sister 25k every month. Since then until now he has never given my sister 1penny from the 25k, he has never bought a clothe nor shoe for his child since he was born. He use his salary to either womanize or Bet. He has borrowed money in almost all the loan apps and my sister keep receiving messages from this loan apps almost everyday, I've also received a message from them before. Their landlord asked then to leave his house because they couldn't pay for house rent and he kept receiving messages from this loan Apps too. He doesn't talk to my sister, they live as neighbors in the house. They only share greetings at home unless he wants to ask my sister for money. They behave as strangers, always shut my sister off.

His company kept 150k with him for 2days and he used the money to play betting not until they start chasing him with calls before he borrowed the money from his sister to settle the bills.

He no longer go to work again, he told my sister yesterday that he has resigned because he's working on a project that will give him twice his investment. We're suspecting that he was sacked (job not up-to 6months)

So last year I advised my sister to start a Thrift so that she can be saving her money and use the money to start a business this year.

My sis called me today and told me that her husband has resigned. He no longer go to work and I advised her to get an apartment outside and give the man space. She has advised him so many times, pray for him, supported him. Uptil today we've never questioned the man, we just want him to treat my sis right but he's not ready to change.

Please nairalanders what do you think we can do? Do you think I gave my sister the right advice?

I don't really want my sis to divorce her husband. But she cries almost everyday.

1Rolake:
Please I need nairalanders advice. I'm in dilemma.

I'm sorry the story is long please take your time and sorry for any mistakes.

My sister and her husband got married late 2018, she was pregnant then.
Few months after their marriage the husband lost his job. He was sacked because he embezzled over 5m from his company.

Note: he dated my sister for only a year before their marriage and only bought a phone (infinix) for my sister during their courtship. He has no car nor a house from this money.

We got to know that he is a chronic gambler. He can bet 200k on a single game.

For 2 years he was out of job, my sister supported him and never complained, we also do not have problem in my family. We didn't even act as if we know that he was out of job for that 2yrs. After my sis gave birth the MIL stayed with them for a year with my sister footing the bills, the MIL eats only Amala every night and my sister covers every damn expenses and still cook for the house. She takes care of her family without complaints.

The problem is that the husband is never satisfy, never appreciate my sis for a day and always complain anytime she did not cook for those 2yrs. He has pushed my sister to collect loans of 40k twice from LAPO without paying back. He sold almost all the properties at home for betting, they have no TV, nor fridge.

In late 2021 he got a job in a restaurant with a salary of 80k and he promised to be given my sister 25k every month. Since then until now he has never given my sister 1penny from the 25k, he has never bought a clothe nor shoe for his child since he was born. He use his salary to either womanize or Bet. He has borrowed money in almost all the loan apps and my sister keep receiving messages from this loan apps almost everyday, I've also received a message from them before. Their landlord asked then to leave his house because they couldn't pay for house rent and he kept receiving messages from this loan Apps too. He doesn't talk to my sister, they live as neighbors in the house. They only share greetings at home unless he wants to ask my sister for money. They behave as strangers, always shut my sister off.

His company kept 150k with him for 2days and he used the money to play betting not until they start chasing him with calls before he borrowed the money from his sister to settle the bills.

He no longer go to work again, he told my sister yesterday that he has resigned because he's working on a project that will give him twice his investment. We're suspecting that he was sacked (job not up-to 6months)

So last year I advised my sister to start a Thrift so that she can be saving her money and use the money to start a business this year.

My sis called me today and told me that her husband has resigned. He no longer go to work and I advised her to get an apartment outside and give the man space. She has advised him so many times, pray for him, supported him. Uptil today we've never questioned the man, we just want him to treat my sis right but he's not ready to change.

Please nairalanders what do you think we can do? Do you think I gave my sister the right advice?

I don't really want my sis to divorce her husband. But she cries almost everyday.

cococandy:
Gambling is an actual disease that requires therapy. He will never change. Advice won’t change him. Prayers won’t change him. Nothing will.

So she’s better off on her own because one day he will borrow from ruthless loan sharks who will kidnap his family and sell them in parts to recoup their money. Gambling is one of the addictions with the highest rate of suicide amongst their addicts

Prettiepearlz:
She has tried at this point. This is more than giving space. She should leave him because he will never change as he is a chronic gambler, serial borrower and a thief. He will never change until he realizes that he has a problem and from your story, he is yet to realize that.

edoman2016:
How old is your sister's husband?

pocohantas:
What is this? Hahahahhaahhaha

No he would never change. I wish her love and light.

1Rolake:
Please I need nairalanders advice. I'm in dilemma.

I'm sorry the story is long please take your time and sorry for any mistakes.

My sister and her husband got married late 2018, she was pregnant then.
Few months after their marriage the husband lost his job. He was sacked because he embezzled over 5m from his company.

Note: he dated my sister for only a year before their marriage and only bought a phone (infinix) for my sister during their courtship. He has no car nor a house from this money.

We got to know that he is a chronic gambler. He can bet 200k on a single game.

For 2 years he was out of job, my sister supported him and never complained, we also do not have problem in my family. We didn't even act as if we know that he was out of job for that 2yrs. After my sis gave birth the MIL stayed with them for a year with my sister footing the bills, the MIL eats only Amala every night and my sister covers every damn expenses and still cook for the house. She takes care of her family without complaints.

The problem is that the husband is never satisfy, never appreciate my sis for a day and always complain anytime she did not cook for those 2yrs. He has pushed my sister to collect loans of 40k twice from LAPO without paying back. He sold almost all the properties at home for betting, they have no TV, nor fridge.

In late 2021 he got a job in a restaurant with a salary of 80k and he promised to be given my sister 25k every month. Since then until now he has never given my sister 1penny from the 25k, he has never bought a clothe nor shoe for his child since he was born. He use his salary to either womanize or Bet. He has borrowed money in almost all the loan apps and my sister keep receiving messages from this loan apps almost everyday, I've also received a message from them before. Their landlord asked then to leave his house because they couldn't pay for house rent and he kept receiving messages from this loan Apps too. He doesn't talk to my sister, they live as neighbors in the house. They only share greetings at home unless he wants to ask my sister for money. They behave as strangers, always shut my sister off.

His company kept 150k with him for 2days and he used the money to play betting not until they start chasing him with calls before he borrowed the money from his sister to settle the bills.

He no longer go to work again, he told my sister yesterday that he has resigned because he's working on a project that will give him twice his investment. We're suspecting that he was sacked (job not up-to 6months)

So last year I advised my sister to start a Thrift so that she can be saving her money and use the money to start a business this year.

My sis called me today and told me that her husband has resigned. He no longer go to work and I advised her to get an apartment outside and give the man space. She has advised him so many times, pray for him, supported him. Uptil today we've never questioned the man, we just want him to treat my sis right but he's not ready to change.

Please nairalanders what do you think we can do? Do you think I gave my sister the right advice?

I don't really want my sis to divorce her husband. But she cries almost everyday.

Kobojunkie:
Leave God out of these things.

Your churches are filled with singles who are hung on one addiction or another - na dem full those churches now. All of dem strung along by the lies their pastors and mogs fill their heads with in the name of God. You tell any of dem say make dem seek professional help for whatever it is that ails them and you will hear them using God as excuse not to apply commonsense.

Raalsalghul:
Another scripted story again?

Seun must have put you guys on double shifts.

cococandy:
babe I’m not joking.

for real. When all those loan apps black list him and he has no where else to go to, he could inevitably fall into truly truly evil people’s hands. There’s a whole underground racket in on this business and they are part of the human/organ trafficking syndicate. Once you owe them, they own you. They’ll use you as a drug mule or sell you as a slave etc. unfortunately your debt will never be paid off and that was their goal all along

Blue86:
In all that I quoted.
I never mentioned Church.
I mentioned God.
It is the gathering of people that make a Church.
The gathering of people don't make God.

God is all we need.
And He gave Jesus as His Salvation gift.
And that Salvation gift can Counsel.

cbaba:
Your whole story is the man is bad and your sister is the hero...how do u know so much about your sister marriage life. What is your role in this their relationship? Are you sure you havent been taking sides & telling her what to do?

Are you married yourself? Will you easily do this to your husband? He embezzled 5m and got away with it...we no go hear this o.

My advice you wanted is stay away and face your life. She Him and they will figure it out.

I'm guessing you are ignorant but YOU are bad for them. Stay away!

Darlingme:
Why is gambling addiction on the increase lately?
What's really happening?

flokii:
@OP Your sister's husband needs all the help he can get to overcome his gambling addiction.. I don't think it's a good advice asking your sis to leave him.
Why not ask the both family elders to call him for a meeting and give him advice or let him see a counselor. Men scarce outside o.

Blue86:
If what you said is true.

All singles, engage God in whatever you do.
Trust in the Lord with all your heart.
Lean not on how smart and very knowledgeable and experienced you are.
In your marital journey acknowledge Him, and He will direct your paths into marital success.

Darlingme:
Why is gambling addiction on the increase lately?
What's really happening?

1Rolake:
His family knows. They told my sister to keep praying for him that his problem is a spiritual problem. They don't want my sister to leave, cos she has really been helping him.

If there's solution I also don't want her to leave.

faithfull18:
people are marrying single parents. I have seen not 1, not 2 with fine husbands, when I mean fine, I mean fine in every aspect including physical features. See beyond you and your immediate environment. If you want proofs, I can give you.

.

Ungodly:
I’d like to see the proof Ma.

Kobojunkie:
God has absolutely nothing to do with what you claim this sin e God said your marriages are of this world and not of His Kingdom - Luke 20 vs 34 - 36 - meaning anyone who follows God only so marriage can be well is sorely mistake.

Jesus Christ made it clear that regardless of the type of relationship you find yourself in and whether you find yourself with your enemy, the rule is the same across the board - do onto others as you will have them do to you and he also guarantees that there will be suffering.

Blue86:
1. Whereas God was the first to create marriage.
Gave directions and regulations for marriage.
And give His judgements concerning marriage.
A man shall leave his mother and cleave to his wife, and the two shall become flesh, was never man's idea , but God's.

2. Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled. Adulterers and whoremongers, God will judge. He who meets a good wife, obtained favour from the Lord and found a good thing.

3. A virtuous woman is a blessing from the Lord.

Kobojunkie:
1.The same God cursed marriage in Genesis 3 vs 16. Abeg, let's update our script on these things, shall we?

2. Your marriages do not honor God. Instead what does is obedience of that which He has in fact commanded of you and marriage is not a commandment but instead a choice. In Matthew 19 vs 4 -12, Jesus Christ clearly expressed this when He submitted that God Himself created some Eunuchs from birth, allowed some to become Eunuchs in life and permitted others to live as such for His sake..


3. There is no such a thing as a virtuous women in God's eyes this since in the Kingdom of God where Jesus Christ reigns and has called us to, your gender means nothing. All that matter is whether you are a Son of God, or not.