₦airaland Forum

buzquet:
Bro, you should not be ashamed. Just man up, apologise briefly to your wife. Don't be too emotional about it. She will constantly drag you into her emotional frame because of the issue.. resist the urge to explain. Whoever she has reported you to, if they call you, just apologise briefly and move on. Don't explain too much for anybody. Remain firm as a man you be. She will come around.


Please don't make mistake of trying to please her too much. Just make sure you pay all the bills as you dey pay am. Don't panic because if you panic, you will press self destruction button.


Women don't care about morality, they only care about if you are Strong Or Weak. If you are Strong, she will forgive you and move on. But If you are weak, she will severally punish you for it till death do una part. Stand strong, sir

Experience dey talk here.

Broken1985:
I must thank you for this.
Thanks for the care and time.
Lessons abound in your response and I am grateful.

I will keep you updated.

Please take all the advice he gave you but don't quit your job. You might live the rest of your life to regret this. Women hate jobless men, and if you fail to provide for the family in a day, you will hear the story of how your father slept with your mother before they gave birth to you. Please don't quit your job

Jaycobbs:
She called your family, friends, colleagues... you'll never be able to win back the trust you lost. Even if you do, it won't be at the same level.

One very big issue staring you in the face is the long distance relationship you're having with your lawfully wedded wife. Either quit the job and find one closer to home, or arrange for your wife to live with you in the new location permanently, or for as long as the job requires.

Newlywed couple, y'all need to be spending as much time together as possible.

If your wife was around, you wouldn't have fallen into that trap. Make the move and make arrangements to always be together with your wife, show her your actions and she'll see you're serious about avoiding future temptations.

It won't be easy, but it's a first step.

If you're going to step out on your wife, at least do it with someone decent. I'm not condoning adultery, but nigga, if you missed the red flags in this your new side piece, then juggling multiple women is not for you because they'll probably both connive to kill you. You're better off remaining faithful to the Mrs.

"You got high"... Lol. Bro, is this the example you want to set for your kids? I don't know what got you high but as you can see, it probably doesn't have good effects, so maybe you should FVCKING GET RID OF THAT? I dunno.

You'll need to do a lot of begging. And the people who could have helped you might already be disappointed, so you may have to do most of the shii on your own. If you want her back, be ready to crawl.

There'll probably be lots of gifts, long talks, missed calls, and spending involved

Oh, and if she decides to revenge by cheating on you (who knows maybe you missed that red flag in your wife too), then don't complain because you set the ball rolling yourself.

Look for a male figure in her life she respects (pastor or something) and get them to set a meeting where you both talk.

If you want more couple's therapy, hmu.

If, against all odds, you're able to fix this, then keep your pants zipped, keep constant communication with your wife regardless of distance (you should make time to have at least thirty minutes to an hour of flirty, dirty conversation with your wife every day if you're separated by distance. This should keep the sexual spark in your marriage going), take steps to rid your mindset of cheating, and set up time to go for therapy with her to rebuild that trust you just casually threw away.

Is it not possible to advise I'm 2 or 3 short paragraphs? Just asking.

Enjoy the dividends of your cheating

God abeg, you are only sorry because she caught you, you will still do it again and again, she is married to a man with no self-control.

Well, take it as contrary view, wifey must know there are areas that are out of bounds.

Jaycobbs:
She called your family, friends, colleagues... you'll never be able to win back the trust you lost. Even if you do, it won't be at the same level.

One very big issue staring you in the face is the long distance relationship you're having with your lawfully wedded wife. Either quit the job and find one closer to home, or arrange for your wife to live with you in the new location permanently, or for as long as the job requires.

Newlywed couple, y'all need to be spending as much time together as possible.

If your wife was around, you wouldn't have fallen into that trap. Make the move and make arrangements to always be together with your wife, show her your actions and she'll see you're serious about avoiding future temptations.

It won't be easy, but it's a first step.

If you're going to step out on your wife, at least do it with someone decent. I'm not condoning adultery, but nigga, if you missed the red flags in this your new side piece, then juggling multiple women is not for you because they'll probably both connive to kill you. You're better off remaining faithful to the Mrs.

"You got high"... Lol. Bro, is this the example you want to set for your kids? I don't know what got you high but as you can see, it probably doesn't have good effects, so maybe you should FVCKING GET RID OF THAT? I dunno.

You'll need to do a lot of begging. And the people who could have helped you might already be disappointed, so you may have to do most of the shii on your own. If you want her back, be ready to crawl.

There'll probably be lots of gifts, long talks, missed calls, and spending involved

Oh, and if she decides to revenge by cheating on you (who knows maybe you missed that red flag in your wife too), then don't complain because you set the ball rolling yourself.

Look for a male figure in her life she respects (pastor or something) and get them to set a meeting where you both talk.

If you want more couple's therapy, hmu.

If, against all odds, you're able to fix this, then keep your pants zipped, keep constant communication with your wife regardless of distance (you should make time to have at least thirty minutes to an hour of flirty, dirty conversation with your wife every day if you're separated by distance. This should keep the sexual spark in your marriage going), take steps to rid your mindset of cheating, and set up time to go for therapy with her to rebuild that trust you just casually threw away.

You'll die of the shame or you'll die off its cancer.....or you could forgive yourself and win what matters to you......

Beta Simps and their problems. Lmao.

GrandFinale2021:
na who them catch na him be theif.
Apparently the wife is also cheating but knows how to cover up her shits unlike the dumb husband

Yes now, she was cheating with you that's why you know all these details abi 🙄

Apologize and give her some space to heal.
She messed up, calling your family and friends. Even if she forgives you, your family members, her family members and some of the friends she told, might not forgive you. There is a reason you don't wash your dirty linen in public.
That's a total bullshit for me.

Jaycobbs:
She called your family, friends, colleagues... you'll never be able to win back the trust you lost. Even if you do, it won't be at the same level.

One very big issue staring you in the face is the long distance relationship you're having with your lawfully wedded wife. Either quit the job and find one closer to home, or arrange for your wife to live with you in the new location permanently, or for as long as the job requires.

Newlywed couple, y'all need to be spending as much time together as possible.

If your wife was around, you wouldn't have fallen into that trap. Make the move and make arrangements to always be together with your wife, show her your actions and she'll see you're serious about avoiding future temptations.

It won't be easy, but it's a first step.

If you're going to step out on your wife, at least do it with someone decent. I'm not condoning adultery, but nigga, if you missed the red flags in this your new side piece, then juggling multiple women is not for you because they'll probably both connive to kill you. You're better off remaining faithful to the Mrs.

"You got high"... Lol. Bro, is this the example you want to set for your kids? I don't know what got you high but as you can see, it probably doesn't have good effects, so maybe you should FVCKING GET RID OF THAT? I dunno.

You'll need to do a lot of begging. And the people who could have helped you might already be disappointed, so you may have to do most of the shii on your own. If you want her back, be ready to crawl.

There'll probably be lots of gifts, long talks, missed calls, and spending involved

Oh, and if she decides to revenge by cheating on you (who knows maybe you missed that red flag in your wife too), then don't complain because you set the ball rolling yourself.

Look for a male figure in her life she respects (pastor or something) and get them to set a meeting where you both talk.

If you want more couple's therapy, hmu.

If, against all odds, you're able to fix this, then keep your pants zipped, keep constant communication with your wife regardless of distance (you should make time to have at least thirty minutes to an hour of flirty, dirty conversation with your wife every day if you're separated by distance. This should keep the sexual spark in your marriage going), take steps to rid your mindset of cheating, and set up time to go for therapy with her to rebuild that trust you just casually threw away.

All this ontop another person matter, lazy youth, go and find job.

Dear OP, stop being a woman wrapper, your wife has seen what she was looking for on your phone, her eyes don clear now, and her mind don touch ground.

Mind you all the people she reported to, they all have multiple side chicks, if you are patient enough, they will tell you that you fuccked up by boyt clearing your chats, some of them will even tell you that they have children outside their marriage which their spouses don't know. If your Mummy tells you how many times she caught your daddy and his numerous side chicks, you go open mouth and not close am again, yet they are still happily married till date

You really fuccked up by not clearing your chats, but it's not a big deal, if she wan cheat back, let her go ahead and see who loses, if she wants to divorce, then I congratulate you, you will be back in the streets, new pussy every single day, until you marry again.

Broken1985:
Nairalanders,

Please don't crucify me yet, just advise me please. Had to utilize a new moniker for this.

I got married last year June and by February 2024, I was transferred to another state for work. I was bored in the city and probably made a mistake. The girl stays in same hotel, and works for a bank, also on a course. So we started talking and one thing led to another. This girl had her phone on audio record the two times we got down and recorded all the audio of the shit we did.

My wife came visiting and of course I defined boundaries the moment wifey was around. A few days back I got high and dozed off, my wife got into my phone saw our chats. Her last chat to me, was regarding the audio. My wife followed through the convo and she sent two 24 minute audios.

Before I could wake, Wifey was already gone from the hotel. And when I checked my phone I saw a long epistle and screen shots of what happened. Now she has called my entire family, friends everybody I know. I am so ashamed of myself.

Is there anything I can do to have her back.
Can she ever forgive me.

I feel so bad having betrayed her.

Ugandan Tales. Come on gerrout of here!

NairaMaster1:
Be an African. You guys are copying the west. How many wives and concubine did Solomon had? Abeg free yourself.

Brighter Grammar highly recommended for you…

Go and marry that hotel girl since your wife has gone to her parents.

Forget about her like say 1 to 2 years, or until her brain gets reset. Then she will come to you

You no dey watch American movies ni. Send some people after her to collect her bag then from no where just show. Beat all of them and give her the bag. Tell her you still care. In the first place you are very stupid. Why cheat and keep record like register. Now its dawn on you. Marriage to some people is like plastic, to others rubber, to some iron, to some ceramic and other people it is like glass. So from the way you are talking yours seems like glass and it can't be fixed just move on.

Like you will forgive her if the tables were yurned?

I hate when people that are not smart cheat. Why cheat when you can't cover your tracks? 🤷‍♂️🤷‍♂️

Hmmm...this is serious. You need to first reconcile with God, make sure you are back on your feet while you keep seeking for her forgiveness at the same time.

She is really wounded.

You can dm me for further guide
08166109757

Broken1985:
Nairalanders,

Please don't crucify me yet, just advise me please. Had to utilize a new moniker for this.

I got married last year June and by February 2024, I was transferred to another state for work. I was bored in the city and probably made a mistake. The girl stays in same hotel, and works for a bank, also on a course. So we started talking and one thing led to another. This girl had her phone on audio record the two times we got down and recorded all the audio of the shit we did.

My wife came visiting and of course I defined boundaries the moment wifey was around. A few days back I got high and dozed off, my wife got into my phone saw our chats. Her last chat to me, was regarding the audio. My wife followed through the convo and she sent two 24 minute audios.

Before I could wake, Wifey was already gone from the hotel. And when I checked my phone I saw a long epistle and screen shots of what happened. Now she has called my entire family, friends everybody I know. I am so ashamed of myself.

Is there anything I can do to have her back.
Can she ever forgive me.

I feel so bad having betrayed her.

To cheat hard Oo… If you wanna cheat, use your head well well and also try get better friends join….#MyOpinion#

Bros, sh*t happens, just move on, if your wife married again, she won't touch any phone again else, she will be divorced the second time.

Your marriage is not even up to a year and you cheated on your wife. You don't deserve her. Go and be single since that's what you chose. Your wife deserves better.

You no suppose dey do like say world don end. Try leave her for a while, then call her, tell her some sweet lies, pet her, and the case should be resolved. If she still dey do shakara, ignore her and move on. Abi she hold your destiny ni?

What I don't like is how she already reported to family members and whoever. If na me, I no go even tell am any shit again. Make she go kpai

Your marriage must be a young one, your wife is certainly imature.

PerfectStranger:
Crying like you're not the bread winner of the house. Instead of getting your shìt together. Are you not a man?

All these Genz kids jumping into marriage. Can't even cheat successfully

As in eh. Nonsense.

As the man of my house and home, if my partner caught me cheating, she is in trouble. If she is caught or I hear say she is cheating, she is gone. No time for nonsense.

Meanwhile, this hacker has been calling everyone in our group whatsapp trying to hack their phone. Please Be warned.

fykes:
Take this advice and take it well...Don't act...don't beg...act like you didn't see the messages she left you. Never bring it up first...

Take it from me...you done messed up, take it up the chin and act like it's no biggie...she will come around much sooner than if you give in to her drama and go begging.

If anybody calls you, tell em you respect them but what's done is done...you will rather they give yall space to deal with it as a couple.

Your wife will get the message...she will wonder why you not acting remorseful? She will wnder if she was so bad and turn thr blame on herself.

It's cold...I know...but that's gonna get the job done sooner than if you go explaining, begging or doing all the things conventional wisdom advises.

When all is said and done...let ur subsequent strayings be just about sex...chemistry and lust.
No good reason you should be chatting and texting a side piece you just met when you are newly married.
Boundaries ain't just physical...should be psychological too

You advice him to gaslight her into believing what he did was good and she is the crazy one?

buzquet:
Bro, you should not be ashamed. Just man up, apologise briefly to your wife. Don't be too emotional about it. She will constantly drag you into her emotional frame because of the issue.. resist the urge to explain. Whoever she has reported you to, if they call you, just apologise briefly and move on. Don't explain too much for anybody. Remain firm as a man you be. She will come around.


Please don't make mistake of trying to please her too much. Just make sure you pay all the bills as you dey pay am. Don't panic because if you panic, you will press self destruction button.


Women don't care about morality, they only care about if you are Strong Or Weak. If you are Strong, she will forgive you and move on. But If you are weak, she will severally punish you for it till death do una part. Stand strong, sir

Nah this is not true, nobody like a cold (in your words strong) man.

Broken1985:
Nairalanders,

Please don't crucify me yet, just advise me please. Had to utilize a new moniker for this.

I got married last year June and by February 2024, I was transferred to another state for work. I was bored in the city and probably made a mistake. The girl stays in same hotel, and works for a bank, also on a course. So we started talking and one thing led to another. This girl had her phone on audio record the two times we got down and recorded all the audio of the shit we did.

My wife came visiting and of course I defined boundaries the moment wifey was around. A few days back I got high and dozed off, my wife got into my phone saw our chats. Her last chat to me, was regarding the audio. My wife followed through the convo and she sent two 24 minute audios.

Before I could wake, Wifey was already gone from the hotel. And when I checked my phone I saw a long epistle and screen shots of what happened. Now she has called my entire family, friends everybody I know. I am so ashamed of myself.

Is there anything I can do to have her back.
Can she ever forgive me.

I feel so bad having betrayed her.

Just got to her and apologize and let her know that you regret it and will stay away from that

But bear in mind that you have killed the trust she had for you and most times, they take revenge in that same way

Just be calm and watch things correcting itself

But on a serious level, women should stop searching their man's phone, it will definitely break your heart

I don't even touch my husband phone because I value my peace of mind

PerfectStranger:
Crying like you're not the bread winner of the house. Instead of getting your shìt together. Are you not a man?

All these Genz kids jumping into marriage. Can't even cheat successfully

I wonder o, as if he's not an African man.

If na me na to just arrange marriage with the chick, wife go come back to fight for me.

Biglittlelois:
Hopefully cheating is a deal breaker for your wife so that she will leave your sorry aśs, your marriage is not up to a year yet you're already inviting stds to infect her, iranu.

Did he tell you he didn't use condom? Why are you accusing him of inviting std?

adecz:
Be a man & ignore her..


She will come back and then you
can calm her down..


After all, last last, man can't be eating
only one soup forever❗️❗️😎😎😎



But I also detect some mumuness in
you, a married man, for recording such amorous dalliances. For what purpose
may I ask..



As for your wife, dem don talk say make
dem leave our phones alone, because
wetin dem they find, dem go see am for
the phone and na dem go dey cry...

Na very big mumu dey marry your type

She should have spoken with you first before telling family members. There are many men who cheat on their wives and you hardly hear of it because of a wise wife.

If this is your first time, she shouldn't be hard on you. Just ask for forgiveness from her. And give her time. Buy her gifts. Offer to take her out.

Women generally should be careful how they react when they catch their husbands cheating. It's very rare to see a husband who doesn't cheat. Just that they do it in a way and manner their wife never finds out. So, the one you caught cheating is not the worst husband. What if you divorce him and marry another man, what is the guarantee that he wouldn't cheat? So, don't over react when you catch your husband cheat. Give him another chance. Remember, if you leave that marriage, another woman is waiting to take your place. And it's harder on women in getting a life partner.

fykes:
Take this advice and take it well...Don't act...don't beg...act like you didn't see the messages she left you. Never bring it up first...

Take it from me...you done messed up, take it up the chin and act like it's no biggie...she will come around much sooner than if you give in to her drama and go begging.

If anybody calls you, tell em you respect them but what's done is done...you will rather they give yall space to deal with it as a couple.

Your wife will get the message...she will wonder why you not acting remorseful? She will wnder if she was so bad and turn thr blame on herself.

It's cold...I know...but that's gonna get the job done sooner than if you go explaining, begging or doing all the things conventional wisdom advises.

When all is said and done...let ur subsequent strayings be just about sex...chemistry and lust.
No good reason you should be chatting and texting a side piece you just met when you are newly married.
Boundaries ain't just physical...should be psychological too

Take this advice, she told everyone important to you work wise and family wise that you bleeped up before the Bleep up was even fresh

She is not mature enough to be apologized to, she will go on a power trip

The moment you apologize, she will fell emboldened and you will never stop apologizing

Profuse apologies are merely a signal to the erred party that you are ripe for emotional blackmail

It’s like apologizing to man that you cheated, it’s pointless, he will use that opportunity to mess you up before he leaves you

Women stay after cheating because many of us were not taught how to hustle for our own livelihood but to support a man, so they stay forever

But the truth is that they secretly hate you and dream of another life with another man

Your wife will never forgive you, same way you will never forgive her but she will pretend and stay

So no worries