₦airaland Forum

Guys happy new year! Been married for 13 years, and I seem not to trust my wife most of the time. The traits are there, attitudinal traits, actions, talk and so many. Guys I have a short story of something that occurred yesterday that my instinct says she cheated on her girls trip out, but before i tell the story, is gut feeling or instinct accurate sometimes?

13 years marriage filled up with trust issues?

Some stories I read online just dey make me dey get double thoughts whether I should transform this my 3 years relationship into marriage or I should just escape through the window for my dear life

God abeg oh

When it comes to dealing with women.....I let my gut feeling do the work.

But man, 13 years and you still don't trust your wife!!! Why not divorce and get yourself some PEACE ✌️

AlphaNugget:
When it comes to dealing with women.....I let my gut feeling do the work.

But man, 13 years and you still don't trust your wife!!! Why not divorce and get yourself some PEACE ✌️

Na because of the kids bro, this uk wey we dey so sef, if to sey we not get kids cos she needs me to assist with care, if not she go dun free me as she dun see freedom for here.

marakpa:
Na because of the kids bro, this uk wey we dey so sef, if to sey we not get kids cos she needs me to assist with care, if not she go dun free me as she dun see freedom for here.

Omo, na why I dey fear to carry woman go outside country......make them no go put shame for my eyes 😮‍💨

But still, you can use style and bring everybody to Nigeria and dump her ass

AlphaNugget:
Omo, na why I dey fear to carry woman go outside country......make them no go put shame for my eyes 😮‍💨

But still, you can use style and bring everybody to Nigeria and dump her ass

she dun kana, dun wise up, she nor dey move an inch until she collect complete citizenship, plus even if we go nija dump her, she can always come back and provide evidence for court i go begin dey pay child support in pounds. Ohbobz its complicated.

marakpa:
she dun kana, dun wise up, she nor dey move an inch until she collect complete citizenship, plus even if we go nija dump her, she can always come back and provide evidence for court i go begin dey pay child support in pounds. Ohbobz its complicated.

God is your strength 💪🙏

marakpa:
Guys happy new year! Been married for 13 years, and I seem not to trust my wife most of the time. The traits are there, attitudinal traits, actions, talk and so many. Guys I have a short story of something that occurred yesterday that my instinct says she cheated on her girls trip out, but before i tell the story, is gut feeling or instinct accurate sometimes?

Seek a marriage therapist, preferably a Nigerian also based here in the UK, to help you achieve clarity.

marakpa:
✓ Guys happy new year! Been married for 13 years, and I seem not to trust my wife most of the time. The traits are there, attitudinal traits, actions, talk and so many. Guys I have a short story of something that occurred yesterday that my instinct says she cheated on her girls trip out, but before i tell the story, is gut feeling or instinct accurate sometimes?

I never understand when people speak of trust in relationship including marriage. I think that is just a reason weak minded individuals use to needlessly shackle themselves down to a notion that is honestly not logical. Humans are by their very nature fallible .i.e. untrustworthy, so what sense is there in saying you trust another when you can't even trust yourself if you are at least honest. 🤔

Anyways, back to the topic. Your wife went out and you suspect she cheated. If you feel strongly about it, confront her gently about it and allow her tell you what she will..lay out whatever clues that may help with your own investigation into the matter...and then go from there. If after all of that you are still not convinced and would rather take it a step further, seek out a professional marriage counselor to see if you can both get on the same page or if it is time for you both to call it quits altogether. 🤔

Sonnobax15:

13 years marriage filled up with trust issues?

Some stories I read online just dey make me dey get double thoughts whether I should transform this my 3 years relationship into marriage or I should just escape through the window for my dear life

God abeg oh

You dey go no where ooo. After all your escapades, who you wan leave her for? She don turn bone for your neck.

marakpa:
Na because of the kids bro, this uk wey we dey so sef, if to sey we not get kids cos she needs me to assist with care, if not she go dun free me as she dun see freedom for here.

That means it is over whether she cheated or not. But she did anyway.

GboyegaD:
You dey go no where ooo. After all your escapades, who you wan leave her for? She don turn bone for your neck.

Na true you talk so oh

AlphaNugget:
Omo, na why I dey fear to carry woman go outside country......make them no go put shame for my eyes 😮‍💨

But still, you can use style and bring everybody to Nigeria and dump her ass

If you dey fear e mean say ...

Dtruthspeaker:
If you dey fear e mean say ...

🙄😒

marakpa:
Guys happy new year! Been married for 13 years, and I seem not to trust my wife most of the time. The traits are there, attitudinal traits, actions, talk and so many. Guys I have a short story of something that occurred yesterday that my instinct says she cheated on her girls trip out, but before i tell the story, is gut feeling or instinct accurate sometimes?

What are you on about? You allow your wife to cheat on you? Are you even ok? There is no way my wife cheats on me without my knowledge and permission. I put my wife on a plane to attend parties outside the country. I got my best fried to take her to take her out.

I desperately want to be cheated on so I can have a legitimate excuse to quit. hahahahah

Seat her down and maybe you guys can agree on an open marriage.

wtf man!

ok first off, I would really love for married person to join on this post to shed some sort of experience analysis here. Secondly I want to use this opportunity to warn any man residing in Nigeria or any other non European country/usa and canada never to bring your wife to those countries if you having certain issues with her before departure. If you dont have the mind or you risk losing your value as a man, dont try it, I have heard about this plenty attimes, but I risked it because of the children, but then what am facing now apart from traits of infidelity is however bigger than the risk I took.

This may be a bit long, so yall should bear with me. So I noticed most times when she wants to go out with me or go out as a family, she doesnt dress sexy or at the sharpest, but if its with her friend or group of friends, na then she go pull out her best wig, take time on what she wants to wear, and making sure her lashes and make up is spot on as against if she's going out with me or with the famz. So last week she told me she was having a new year outing with her work colleagues, though one of the work colleage whom I know she goes out with on a suspicious outing works in another branch, and I have seen her like a home breaker but you cant do shiiit or advise anything here in this western country against such person as I have seen that she's stuck with this lady and listens to her even more than the husband.

So yesterday, I noticed the un-sual which is always the usual, i.e bringing out the best of what she wants to wear, as for me oo, i dont hide my intuition and suspicion as I always stylishly and jokingly out it out to her sey me I know sey this una waka nor pure, sey this amusement park wey una dey go na just diversion, it must be something else. She will reply by saying well I know sey u go always doubt my movement but nothing at all etc. So that yesterday, took time on make up, first off pulled out one baggy jeans tried it in my presence, I know sey na reels she dey perform, as the tight leggins wey she wan wear to shoot out her big butt was already by the side, next thing she pull am off saying this is too big, next thing she dun wear the tights, una go think sey na jealous man dey type or insecure, but nobody dey live with me so I know the woman wey i dey talk about here. Before she comot, she dun come profess her love to me, trying to kiss me etc, something she rarely does, that alone was a red flag, come still ask if I wan do quickie, something she does though, but not on this kind of scenario, I found all these moves pre- guilty conscience moves but I just dey observe.

To cut the story short sha, she enter living room BOOM, if una see wetin she wear, if na me and her dey comot like that i go too like am but the looks without me there is for the streets or for someones impression, this feeling felt somehow, I sha hail am sha as per normal, sey beauty as its best bla bla bla,sexylee! then she set out. You see where them go ehn! the place is stressful and its really cold here, so for that kind of journey they are spose to spend time there cos we went there together and the kids 2weeks ago, I sha notice sey as she reach, she dun quick call me for video call sey them dun reach i sey no P,this was around 2.45pm. So I sha step out to go see a friend of mine around 5.57, my daughter come call me sey she dey try reach her mama sey her phone nor dey go, I called her on whatsapp, immediately she switched the wasap to video, sey she dun dey inside train already, heading back to her best friends house to pick the car and start coming home, while this conversation was going on, she could not link to words together properly and her eyes were tinted, so I noticed she was somewhat high, I asked why she's sounding that way and why eyes are tinted, she replied she did the high roller coaster so it affected her,but I know sey she dun drink and this is something she would normally wouldn't do only if am there, anyways I said no P, delivered my message to her then she said her phone go soon off, make i give my daughter the new number she just got with the new phone.

Daughter called back again saying she cant reach her, i called back, this time on normal call cos the other phone was off, she said she's still in the train even though it sounds like it isn't, sounded like she was somewhere quiet rather than a moving train, but i nor wan dey ask questions as these things are things I just want to stop doing for my peace of mind, I come deliver message then hang up.

Fastforward and hour and the half later, she called that she's home, on getting home she was still stuttering and her eyes tinted, I still come ask am sey wetin u drink, she got defensive and said I should not ask her again, though she changed her black tights she wore out to a pink one while doing tiktok content, I come notice sey the pink tight wey she wear get stained mark on the middle butt part, I come ask her if she was doing menses, she said no, and why I asked, I come show am, then smelled it, got defensive saying I dun start. I know sey una go come for me this on this one, but omo the smell was terrible and bad, and it was in the middle of her butt not underneath where veejay resides, and to me that is butt juice which normally she doesnt normally experience, never have I seen that in a long time, that just gave me away that this woman dun go do shit that yesterday, and these things are toturing me mentally, I wish I can have a gf by the side make i just use am dey forget all these traumas. In this UK, if them nor Bleep ur wife, no matter how faithful she is, then thank ya jah.

so you mean she had anal sex, that's crazy sex experience...she must be high on something extraordinary to accept such, plus she's on a long thing with some crazy sex addict/nymphomaniac.....May God help you and try to talk to your inlaw but do not spill the whole scenerio cuz u are yet to catch her in the act.....Before you tell ur inlaw be sure they are not the biased type of inlaw or those that always in support of what ever their daughter do or says.....

Damn, she will go for another round.....you guys are trying sha.

marakpa:
➜Na because of the kids bro, this uk wey we dey so sef, if to sey we not get kids cos she needs me to assist with care, if not she go dun free me as she dun see freedom for here.

So, your family felt marriage was shackled in marriage all of this while?

marakpa:
➜ok first off, I would really love for married person to join on this post to shed some sort of experience analysis here. Secondly I want to use this opportunity to warn any man residing in Nigeria or any other non European country/usa and canada never to bring your wife to those countries if you having certain issues with her before departure.
➜If you dont have the mind or you risk losing your value as a man, dont try it, I have heard about this plenty attimes, but I risked it because of the children, but then what am facing now apart from traits of infidelity is however bigger than the risk I took.

So, men in Nigeria don't have the same things happening to them even as we speak? Na only men in abroad dey waka around suspecting wifey fit dey cheat? 🙄

2. So, men for Nigeria no dey lose their value at all? In Nigeria, all men are guaranteed to maintain their value as men abi? This one never even begin to understand wetin dey do am sef yet him don convince himself say him wife as far as relationship and marriage! 🙄🙄🙄

OP, the problem is with you as the man in the family. Get used to making hard decisions.

Nnamdipapa:
OP, the problem is with you as the man in the family. Get used to making hard decisions.

Brao, its an entirely different ball game here. Women hold this country, u wont understand until ur here with ur famz.

Kobojunkie:
So, men in Nigeria don't have the same things happening to them even as we speak? Na only men in abroad dey waka around suspecting wifey fit dey cheat? 🙄

2. So, men for Nigeria no dey lose their value at all? In Nigeria, all men are guaranteed to maintain their value as men abi? This one never even begin to understand wetin dey do am sef yet him don convince himself say him wife as far as relationship and marriage! 🙄🙄🙄

You cant compare bro, i am not competing or disagreeing to what you have speculated, but you see here, u can go to jail for something wey u nor do, infact something u never have thought of doing and na the woman wey u call ur wife go eff u up.

marakpa:
Brao, its an entirely different ball game here. Women hold this country, u wont understand until ur here with ur famz.

I lived abroad for almost 15years with a wife and raised kids there with no single issue, I even banned my MIL from visiting my home with threats of leaving the marriage. I have money and assets hidden in places only mentioned in my trust documents if I die and I am even the one with a side chick.

In every relationship, you must learn how to retain the power dynamics. I have a Phd in emotional manipulations and assets hiding. I studied marriage and divorce laws here and understand the loopholes very well.

No woman messes with me in Nigeria or anywhere in the world.
Once again, it is your fault when you allow your wife to play you like a piano.

I created a career I can control anywhere in the world and If she vex me, I will take the next plane to an undisclosed location in Nigeria with lots of willing female attentions and never return.

I will be good to you if you are good to me and life is purely transactional with little emotions.

marakpa:
➜You cant compare bro, i am not competing or disagreeing to what you have speculated, but you see here, u can go to jail for something wey u nor do,
➜infact something u never have thought of doing and na the woman wey u call ur wife go eff u up.

So, the over 60% of Nigerian prison inmates right there in Nigerian prisons today who remain uncharged for any crime— dem no commit any crime at all — are what? You people should stop telling outrageously ridiculous tales abeg! 🙄

The only reason you would end up in jail abroad is if it is established that a crime was committed...you have to be charged and found guilty before that happens even if erroneously). Other than that, you can't be thrown in jail. 🙄🙄

Nnamdipapa:
I lived abroad for almost 15years with a wife and raised kids there with no single issue, I even banned my MIL from visiting my home with threats of leaving the marriage. I have money and assets hidden in places only mentioned in my trust documents if I die and I am even the one with a side chick.

In every relationship, you must learn how to retain the power dynamics. I have a Phd in emotional manipulations and assets hiding. I studied marriage and divorce laws here and understand the loopholes very well.

No woman messes with me in Nigeria or anywhere in the world.
Once again, it is your fault when you allow your wife to play you like a piano.

I created a career I can control anywhere in the world and If she vex me, I will take the next plane to an undisclosed location in Nigeria with lots of willing female attentions and never return.

I will be good to you if you are good to me and life is purely transactional with little emotions.

Bros throw me ur contact make we reason.