₦airaland Forum

Seun
Mynd44

Please, this post should go to the front page. Please! I think someone genuinely needs help here.

Samantha125:
Is your brother prepared to go to the rehab though? Because you can never force an addict to go clean, only he can make that decision himself... Otherwise you guys will just waste your money trying to help someone who isn't ready to change.

He keep on saying nothing is wrong with him..

immortalcrown:
Seun
Mynd44

Please, this post should go to the front page. Please! I think someone genuinely needs help here.

Thanks..

Please.. I really need help..

You see, he's not ready to change... Even if you get money to take him to rehab, chances are he'll still go back to using again.

Until he acknowledges that he needs help, there's nothing much you guys can do apart from just keeping him in your prayers.

podium:
He keep on saying nothing is wrong with him..

But still, I feel like he should have been more considerate of your feelings.

podium:
My dad is not manipulating me.. even though he is a farmer, he was still very strong, but down my dad and mum are just like skeletons.. they are working dead, unless God will only keep them.. I could not even imagine that he was my dad.. bone all part his body.. he has seen that the end is near, even me, I have seen it.. i am just praying to God to sustain them..

Samantha125:
What kind of a parent calls his child to ask him to arrange money for his burial in case he dies?

A lot of Nigerians breed children with no financial plans on ground for the child to be properly supported and established. Then later, they start pushing the child to the cold world and harsh Nigerian economy to go and hustle

Marriage many of them say is an achievement ( Even without gathering appropriate resources)

podium:
I have not smoked even cigar since I was born, talking of weed. I once ask someone who smoke weed if it can make someone mad. The person said no, unless it will be the work of the village people, so that there will say it is weed that make someone mad.

Nothing like village people, if your head no strong wahala go dey. But for real weed no dey make person mad. It has never happened.

Samantha125:
You see, he's not ready to change... Even if you get money to take him to rehab, chances are he'll still go back to using again.

Until he acknowledges that he needs help, there's nothing much you guys can do apart from just keeping him in your prayers.

Your reasoning is very funny.

So when someone has mental illness the family should abandon him/her.....is that how you people do things in your place.

Can someone with mental illness make critical decisions by themselves??

Nawa ooo

That's the thing, his brother doesn't have any mental illness... He made his own choice to become an addict and he himself can only end his addiction, not his family or friends.

Bobodee09:
Your reasoning is very funny.

So when someone has mental illness the family should abandon him/her.....is that how you people do things in your place.

Can someone with mental illness make critical decisions by themselves??

Nawa ooo

Draggun:
Nothing like village people, if your head no strong wahala go dey. But for real weed no dey make person mad. It has never happened.

Who told you that. Have you ever heard of Schizophrenia? Do you know it is prevalent in Africa and over 90% are not diagnosed on time. Weed is known to trigger it. It can also trigger symptoms of madness in people with PTSD and depression. The question now is who is depressed, have PTSD or Schizophrenia? Best is to be safe than sorry, trust me weed is not worth the hype

podium:
He keep on saying nothing is wrong with him..

Those are symptoms of Psychosis. He is in another world and once in a while he will back to normal and then out again. If taken to a rehab he will be given drugs that will stop him from having hallucinations. To him he is normal and you are the one with mental illness.
https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/heavy-cannabis-use-linked-to-schizophrenia-especially-among-young-men/

Samantha125:
What kind of a parent calls his child to ask him to arrange money for his burial in case he dies?

You're not a Nigerian and won't understand

The Govt doesn't conduct funerals for the dead in Nigerian; families do and it's very expensive, especially for struggling families.

So, the father saying that was a way of reminding the guy what lies ahead for him and a subtle threat for him to call his siblings to order.

Draggun:
Your brother is smoking something else because weed doesn't make one mad. I smoke weed daily so I know what I'm saying and other stoners can attest to that. I am 100% certain he takes Crystal Methamphetamine popularly known as ice which has affected his brain.

Big lie.

Marijuana can cause mental issues, aka, madness.

podium:
I have not smoked even cigar since I was born, talking of weed. I once ask someone who smoke weed if it can make someone mad. The person said no, unless it will be the work of the village people, so that there will say it is weed that make someone mad.

Bros, MARIJUANA, also known as 'weed' or 'igbo', CAUSES MENTAL DISORDER. Anyone tell you that it doesn't may mostly be suffering from one he thinks that is normal. Many mad people do not see themselves as mad people

Google bro.

SUPERPACK:
Who told you that. Have you ever heard of Schizophrenia? Do you know it is prevalent in Africa and over 90% are not diagnosed on time. Weed is known to trigger it. It can also trigger symptoms of madness in people with PTSD and depression. The question now is who is depressed, have PTSD or Schizophrenia? Best is to be safe than sorry, trust me weed is not worth the hype

Correct bro.

We have Google and some peeps are still asking questions from those who may be suffering from the mental effects of weeds.

Elusive001:
Big lie.

Marijuana can cause mental issues, aka, madness.

I have never seen or heard any case, don't let the internet fool you.

SUPERPACK:
Who told you that. Have you ever heard of Schizophrenia? Do you know it is prevalent in Africa and over 90% are not diagnosed on time. Weed is known to trigger it. It can also trigger symptoms of madness in people with PTSD and depression. The question now is who is depressed, have PTSD or Schizophrenia? Best is to be safe than sorry, trust me weed is not worth the hype

I have been smoking weed more than a decade now and my head is very much okay. Don't let the internet fool you; they're quick to spread misinformation to instill fear on people like you.

Draggun:
I have been smoking weed more than a decade now and my head is very much okay. Don't let the internet fool you; they're quick to spread misinformation to instill fear on people like you.

It's hard for an abuser of substance to accept any defect nor side effects it's part of the symptoms of withdrawal effect. Same way a chronic alcohol user will never accept he is drunk until the day he is embarrassed in public. Before you can claim you are okay,please go and take an alcohol based psychological test. I hope you find help now you can still use the internet. Peace

SUPERPACK:
It's hard for an abuser of substance to accept any defect nor side effects it's part of the symptoms of withdrawal effect. Same way a chronic alcohol user will never accept he is drunk until the day he is embarrassed in public. Before you can claim you are okay,please go and take an alcohol based psychological test. I hope you find help now you can still use the internet. Peace

Help? I don't need no fucking help nigga. I'm not the regular rough looking weed smoker you see around your neighborhood. I don't even look like it and my grades are good as Bleep. I smoke weed to relax and I don't abuse it. I eat well and take care of myself so miss me with that bs.

podium:
I was in the village on Wednesday, there are two land in the village which my dad use it as a collateral to collect 300k for my brother school stuff. He beg those people for the money and even show them my brother results, that was why those people gave him 150k each, even if the want to sell the two land, it will not be upto 500k.. I have beg my dad to sell the two land in other to take my brother to a rehab centre.. he said the land was a gift from his grandparents, and it is not usually sold..

If he wouldn't sell his land to take care of his son, why are you stressing yourself?

Free2Fly:
You're not a Nigerian and won't understand

The Govt doesn't conduct funerals for the dead in Nigerian; families do and it's very expensive, especially for struggling families.

So, the father saying that was a way of reminding the guy what lies ahead for him and a subtle threat for him to call his siblings to order.

We should stop encouraging wrong behavior. The dead is gone and people should do what they can within their means to bury their dead when it happens. There's no measure for what a successful burial is.

Draggun:
Help? I don't need no fucking help nigga. I'm not the regular rough looking weed smoker you see around your neighborhood. I don't even look like it and my grades are good as Bleep. I smoke weed to relax and I don't abuse it. I eat well and take care of myself so miss me with that bs.

Good

Free2Fly:
You're not a Nigerian and won't understand

The Govt doesn't conduct funerals for the dead in Nigerian; families do and it's very expensive, especially for struggling families.

[Ab]So, the father saying that was a way of reminding the guy what lies ahead for him and a subtle threat for him to call his siblings to order[/b].

@bold:

Exactly the point Samantha is hitting on.

May God deliver us from devourers.

podium:
➜Greetings All, I want to make this simple and short.. I need help.
We are 3 in the family, my dad is not doing well, he is a farmer in the village. My mom is not strong to do anything, she start in the house, while dad works in the farm and sells the petty harvest from the farm. I am the first son, I work in a private school with 2kids and a wife.. it is only God that has been my greatest provider. my sister is nothing to write home about, my brother was doing very well in school. Therefore my dad lease his farm to people in other to support my bro in school.. I really saw greatness in my brother and I really believe he will be the one to left up the family.. my dad didn't really care about me, I am an introvert and a shy person, so I am not very bold and i am always alone. My dad never really care about me. I started working in the private school since 2012 with a salary of 7k till date with a salary of 30k. I be frank I am better than some of my mate. Some people do not believe I am surviving with a 30k salary with 2kids and a wife, to make it worst, my wife is not working so therefore I am everything in the hauz. When I was single, I save small money from my job which I use it to sponsor my self in school, I am done with ND And HND, but no money for my clearance. Now back to the main issues: my brother was doing very excellent in school, I don't know how he got into smoking Indian herm. He got into it and now, since last he is not normal again. My brother is slowly running mad, he has brought disgrace and embarrassment to the family, my dad and mum and now a laughing stock in the village.. my bro is turning into a mad man. But he still have 90 percent of his memory.
➜My parents are weak, the last time my dad calls me, he told me to arrange money for their burial incase they die anytime.. like this I can't boast of 1k in my account, my parents are drying up everyday due to depression, thinking and embarrassment my brother has brought to the family.. upon all the suffering my dad passed through in other to support my brother, now my brother is nothing to write home about... Please who can help my brother, who can rehab him. Please. I will be losing 3 things this year, unless God will say no.. please someone should help me. I have been crying everyday, praying to God to heal my brother...

1. Your story lacks the necessary details. You claim your brother is mentally ill — he is sick—, but how does that translate to embarrassment for the family, etc.?

How old are your mom and dad and why have they chosen to live as they do now? I mean they have 2 other kids so why choose to die because of the troubles of just one kid?

Free2Fly:
➜You're not a Nigerian and won't understand. The Govt doesn't conduct funerals for the dead in Nigerian; families do and it's very expensive, especially for struggling families. So, the father saying that was a way of reminding the guy what lies ahead for him and a subtle threat for him to call his siblings to order.

Why should a father do that though? In this year 2025, why should any well-meaning parent decide it OK to choose death for what OP has stated and further burden an already struggling child at that?

podium:
➜400level, civil engineering.. his 100level and 200level was very good. All A's. 300l we stop seeing his results because he didn't show it to anyone.. I have been praying and crying to God to help him

Have you ever in fact sat your brother down to ask him why he started smoking weed? It may be that he already had mental problems to begin with and decided to medicate using weed. You need to take your brother to see a professional mental health therapist or counselor to ascertain what is wrong with him. That is something your father and mother ought to have done in this case, not sit back and worry about what others think or say.

Kobojunkie:
1. Your story lacks the necessary details. You claim your brother is mentally ill — he is sick—, but how does that translate to embarrassment for the family, etc.?

How old are your mom and dad and why have they chosen to live as they do now? I mean they have 2 other kids so why choose to die because of the troubles of just one kid?

You don't read to understand, someone who was doing very well in school, a bright child. Now he is a laughing stock in the village..

Kobojunkie:
Have you ever in fact sat your brother down to ask him why he started smoking weed? It may be that he already had mental problems to begin with and decided to medicate using weed. You need to take your brother to see a professional mental health therapist or counselor to ascertain what is wrong with him. That is something your father and mother ought to have done in this case, not sit back and worry about what others think or say.

If you called and sit him down, in the next second he will tell you there's no tym for him to be with you. And he will stand up and leave.

podium:
➜If you called and sit him down, in the next second he will tell you there's no tym for him to be with you. And he will stand up and leave.

I take that to mean you have never in fact sat your brother down to properly understand what it is he is struggling with. OK! So, how is it that your brother causes embarrassment and disgrace to your family? What details can you offer to this?

podium:
➜You don't read to understand, someone who was doing very well in school, a bright child. Now he is a laughing stock in the village..

You failed to include information on how exactly your brother became a laughingstock in your village though. So, what is there for me to understand when you gave no detail on how your brother became a source of embarrassment and disgrace to your father and mother? 🤔🤔

Kobojunkie:
You failed to include information on how exactly your brother became a laughingstock in your village though. So, what is there for me to understand when you gave no detail on how your brother became a source of embarrassment and disgrace to your father and mother? 🤔🤔

Roaming about the whole village, going to the bush looking for mango, pears, etc. Dancing to unheard music, talking by himself.. wearing just 1 clothes for a year, he once went to a nearby church close to our compound to live inside the church.. the key was always keep in our compound.. the pastor order some youth to throw him out. That time he didn't burn his clothes, his pot and gas cylinder.. they collected the church key from my parents, throw out all his stuff.. he carry everything and be roaming about the village on his head. He later burn everything including the clothes he once bought for my mum..

podium:
➜Roaming about the whole village, going to the bush looking for mango, pears, etc. Dancing to unheard music, talking by himself.. wearing just 1 clothes for a year,
➜he once went to a nearby church close to our compound to live inside the church.. the key was always keep in our compound.. the pastor order some youth to throw him out. That time he didn't burn his clothes, his pot and gas cylinder.. they collected the church key from my parents, throw out all his stuff.. he carry everything and be roaming about the village on his head.
➜He later burn everything including the clothes he once bought for my mum..

Ayeee!!!!!

2.

3. But earlier, you claimed he had about 90% of his memory still. So how were you able to ascertain this? Did you have your brother's condition diagnosed and hooked up to a machine to determine this?

I have only one other question for you @OP. Do you and your people have a heart at all? Your brother is off his hinges. Rather than empathize with him and immediately find ways to help get him the best treatment for what it is that is wrong with him, you resort to telling us fantastical tales about how is an embarrassment, a laughingstock, and all the rest. You even go as far as to tell us of his own flesh and blood parents choosing to busy themselves with depression over what others think or say rather than focus on finding treatment for their son who once had a brilliant life in front of him. Na wa ooo!

immortalcrown:
1.
Try rehabilitation agency for your brother because drug addiction is very destructive and hard to cure. But the cure is possible.

2.
Always invite your brother and encourage him. You can do it over the phone is you live far from him. When talking to him, avoid mocking or scolding him. Encouragement is better than scolding and hyping is better than mockery in this type of situation. This is psychology. You can't use provocation to win him back. Just remind him that he is destined for greatness. Remind him of his good academic performance in the past. Remind him that he is a hero because not all from poor backgrounds can do well in school like he does. Then, beg him to stop anything that can ruin his destiny. Tell him that you foresee him being rich and having a beautiful wife and great children. Dis kind preaching go fit reset him brain.

While talking to him, never make the mistake of informing him that the family is hoping on him. If you tell him that, he will conclude that you just want to push him into a position for him to carry all the burdens in the family. Avoid letting him know that his success will benefit the family. E get why. Psychology is deep and may appear crazy.

3.
Your wife should look for a job. Even if it is to hawk sachet water and snacks. Even if it is to work as a house cleaner or nanny. What she contributes will go a long way in helping the family. I wonder the standard of living your family has with 30k. I want to ask why you went into marriage with that level of poverty, but let that be a story for another day.

4.
Your sister? Let me not say much since you have not said much about her. But if care is not taken, that one might be another cross for your family. I pray she doesn't breed children outside wedlock and depend on you people to raise those children.

Depression is real. Didn't you read the condition of the parents? Mother is weak, father has been toiling in farms to sustain the family and the son he laboured so much for is about to be a waste. Don't you understand how this situation can deteriorate the parents' mental and physical health?

God bless you.