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I Want To Leave My Marriage Because My Husband Is Weak - Family (9) - Nairaland

Nairaland ForumNairaland GeneralFamilyI Want To Leave My Marriage Because My Husband Is Weak (39033 Views)

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Re: I Want To Leave My Marriage Because My Husband Is Weak by Kobojunkie:
GUNITGuy:
Find a way of staying it will pay off .... Don't divorce you would reap it .....
➜Your children would be blessed with... As long as it's not affecting your children...
➜ Don't listen to feminist theory....So many women are facing worse than you think but will make you feel they are better than you after divorce or without a husband...
➜It's not rosy out there, live social media hype of a happy life ...it's not always as smooth as we think
What is the guarantee of this claim of yours? undecided

2. Children living with a father who uses incompetence as a weapon against their own mother would not be affected. Yikes! lipsrsealed lipsrsealed lipsrsealed

3. Telling OP to think of herself first in the relationship is feminist but advising a woman to continue to carry the burden that is a husband who does not seem to appreciate her is a better option. WOW! undecided

4. It is not rosy out there hence OP should continue to suffer depression and anxiety inside of marriage rather than seek help outside of marriage. WOW!! undecided
Re: I Want To Leave My Marriage Because My Husband Is Weak by Kobojunkie: 8:20pm On Feb 19, 2025
ADAMUdaCOWBOY:
➜So people will look at you and complain that you have lost weight since you got married? Which kind of zero emotional intelligence people are those?
Have you never been around Nigerians before? 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
Re: I Want To Leave My Marriage Because My Husband Is Weak by joseph1832(m): 8:23pm On Feb 19, 2025
musicwriter:
Life is not worth living at old age. That's why death exists. Death is the best thing that could happen to anything that's alive.

The problem is that fear has been created through the ages in people that death means the end. But death is not an end. Death is just like the same way you came to this world- from another life. You weren't dead before you were born. You have always been alive but not as a human being.

Death is a way for nature to recycle itself. However, in the process you'll either progress higher or lower or be weeded out if nature finds you unnecessary.
So you're saying nature finds us necessary that's why we are alive today, hmm.

I know all about the Fear created about death from ages past. Its like a stigma hung around people's neck, especially religious folks.

So, the thing I honestly want to know is which life did we come from, before we were born into this Earth?
Re: I Want To Leave My Marriage Because My Husband Is Weak by Kobojunkie: 8:23pm On Feb 19, 2025
MASTAkiLLAh:
➜quietly go to the nearest police station and lodge a report against your neighbors and they'll handle everything from there. As for your husband, he will never suddenly become hardworking or responsible. You either drag him to welfare office in your local government for them to settle the matter or convert him to a house husband with monthly salary of 50k or go your separate ways. He should remember, time is also going for him and he has to plan for retirement and if he won't at least, he shouldn't drag you back.
That's if your story isn't made up sha because most Nairaland stories are fictional
How do you convert a man who has, after many years of marriage, not realized he needs to contribute, to a househusband? You wan make them end up like the policeman and his wife story wey we read yesterday for crime section? huh
Re: I Want To Leave My Marriage Because My Husband Is Weak by tctrills: 8:26pm On Feb 19, 2025
Kobojunkie:
OP is not divorced yet she is lonely and depressed in marriage. So, what the f0--ck is with the inane attempt to link depression to divorce? Nonsense! angry
This man, already, there is a big link between divorce and depression. It has been studied and papers have been written on it.
It's ok if you take time to study.
Re: I Want To Leave My Marriage Because My Husband Is Weak by joseph1832(m): 8:26pm On Feb 19, 2025
Kobojunkie:
Have you never been around some Nigerians before? 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
don't generalize, please.
Re: I Want To Leave My Marriage Because My Husband Is Weak by Kobojunkie: 8:26pm On Feb 19, 2025
ModestManager:
IF YOU COMMIT SUICIDE, YOU WILL IMMEDIATELY LAND IN HELL FIRE FOREVER-NO ESCAPE!!!
Jesus Christ wants to help you, but you think you can help yourself...see now! GIVE YOUR LIFE TO HIM NOW! Read the Holy Bible DAILY!
DOn't listen to demons telling you to 'end it all',,,they lie everytime, rather they should say 'start it all'. Start what 'punishment in hell fire'....I like your resilience, and 1 great thing you've done is YOU CAME ONLINE TO LOOK FOR HELP......Go to God and He will help you out!
Attend a BIBLE church like Deeper Life Church, Foursquare, assemblies of God, and few similar ones....Churches where they worship images and idols can NEVER help you...I won't mention names, but you know them, white garment churches can never help you, ONLY JESUS CAN HELP.........Ask Him today. Those your neighbours will disappear suddenly and start minding their business, your husband will suddenly realize how badly he's been treating you, etc!
God bless you for reaching out! Remember what I said first. Somebody loves you here. Cheers sister!
Stop lying to hell! She is a Nigerian, not an Israelite and she would land in a Hell prescribed only for Israelites. Nonsense! undecided
Re: I Want To Leave My Marriage Because My Husband Is Weak by Kobojunkie:
SouthAmericalif:
.....i bought him toyota camry,
.....bought big nylon machine he no work all this money na from legit struggles when i suppose package my self japa
but the business i dey use my hand do dey work even with this i dey run 2bedroom flat rent ,expensive act fees and all the bills myself include food. I no complain
my complain now is that while carrying out all this struggles one neighbor out of joblessness and jealousy of what i am not even enjoying will be bullying me psychologically publicly
DrFunmisticGlow:
you are a married single mum. Better drop the dead weight you call a husband and focus on yourself and your children.
BINGO! 😂😂😂😂😂
Re: I Want To Leave My Marriage Because My Husband Is Weak by ozo13(m): 8:28pm On Feb 19, 2025
Seunmuham:
And some of this type of men can complain and also claim fine boy
smiley
Re: I Want To Leave My Marriage Because My Husband Is Weak by WantsandMore: 8:29pm On Feb 19, 2025
Kobojunkie:
1. What has pragmatism to do with any of this? undecided

2. I don't follow! What unresolved theoretical debate? Are you not able to mentally realize that your behavior is driven by your thoughts or what? undecided
Yes, I understand that my behavior is driven by my thoughts but why is it hard to control or change those thoughts?
Re: I Want To Leave My Marriage Because My Husband Is Weak by Kobojunkie: 8:33pm On Feb 19, 2025
WantsandMore:
Yes, I understand that my behavior is driven by my thoughts but why is it hard to control or change those thoughts?
An adult who finds it hard to control his/her thoughts is one who obviously lacks self-discipline. Duh?! 🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄
Re: I Want To Leave My Marriage Because My Husband Is Weak by WantsandMore: 8:35pm On Feb 19, 2025
Kobojunkie:
An adult who finds it hard to control his/her thoughts is one who obviously lacks self-discipline. Duh?! 🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄
not really.
Re: I Want To Leave My Marriage Because My Husband Is Weak by Kobojunkie: 8:35pm On Feb 19, 2025
tctrills:
➜This man, already, there is a big link between divorce and depression. It has been studied and papers have been written on it. It's ok if you take time to study.
It is always the way you lot confidently beat your chests over your blatant ignorance that makes me wonder why! ***shudder***
Re: I Want To Leave My Marriage Because My Husband Is Weak by Seunmuham: 8:35pm On Feb 19, 2025
cr7lomo:
Oppressing grin grin grin grin grin grin grin....only dumb 4ks think this way ....
Only dumb 4k talk like you. Marriage Na achievement
Re: I Want To Leave My Marriage Because My Husband Is Weak by Kobojunkie: 8:36pm On Feb 19, 2025
WantsandMore:
not really.
You are not aware of this simple fact of life at this point in your growth? undecided
Re: I Want To Leave My Marriage Because My Husband Is Weak by tctrills: 8:38pm On Feb 19, 2025
Kobojunkie:
It is always the way you lot confidently beat your chests over your blatant ignorance that makes me wonder why! ***shudder***
Insult is free but after insulting, please find these papers and read them.
Parental Divorce, Familial Risk for Depression, and Psychopathology in Offspring: A Three-Generation Study by Myrna M. Weissman et al. (2018)

The Role of Parental Divorce in Childhood on Depression Among Adults by Sarah A. Myer (2021)

Anxiety, depression and associated factors among recently divorced individuals by Severin D. Soukup et al. (2020)

(PDF) Parental Divorce and Depression by Naomi Wauterickx, Anneleen Gouwy, and Piet Bracke (2013)

DIVORCE AND DEPRESSION: A FORENSIC CASE OF OUR OBSERVATION AND PREVENTION STRATEGIES by C. Scalise et al. (2023)
Re: I Want To Leave My Marriage Because My Husband Is Weak by Kobojunkie: 8:40pm On Feb 19, 2025
tctrills:
➜Insult is free but after insulting, please find these papers and read them.
Parental Divorce, Familial Risk for Depression, and Psychopathology in Offspring: A Three-Generation Study by Myrna M. Weissman et al. (2018)
The Role of Parental Divorce in Childhood on Depression Among Adults by Sarah A. Myer (2021)
Anxiety, depression and associated factors among recently divorced individuals by Severin D. Soukup et al. (2020)
(PDF) Parental Divorce and Depression by Naomi Wauterickx, Anneleen Gouwy, and Piet Bracke (2013)
DIVORCE AND DEPRESSION: A FORENSIC CASE OF OUR OBSERVATION AND PREVENTION STRATEGIES by C. Scalise et al. (2023)
sad It is always the way you lot confidently beat your chests over your blatant ignorance that makes me wonder why! ***shudder***
Re: I Want To Leave My Marriage Because My Husband Is Weak by tctrills: 8:43pm On Feb 19, 2025
Kobojunkie:
sad It is always the way you lot confidently beat your chests over your blatant ignorance that makes me wonder why! ***shudder***
If you were wise, you would have read at least one of the papers before you continued with the argument. Oga since you are too lazy, let's not insult ourselves, just go.
Re: I Want To Leave My Marriage Because My Husband Is Weak by musicwriter(m):
joseph1832:
So you're saying nature finds us necessary that's why we are alive today, hmm.

I know all about the Fear created about death from ages past. Its like a stigma hung around people's neck, especially religious folks.

So, the thing I honestly want to know is which life did we come from, before we were born into this Earth?
Since you follow me on this forum, you should know these things because I have dropped information about that many times.

Before Christianity, the ancients (after observing nature for millions of years) already documented these things. They said life is a cycle.

The ancients said that before you became a human being, you've already existed as frog, mosquito, elephant, dog, cat, goat, EVERYTHING.

They said it takes 3,000 year to complete the cycle (be all things) then return. The cycle has no end, so you've always been alive.

Have you ever wondered why there's always mosquitos, rats, cats, dogs, fish?

A historian named Herodotus, who traveled to ancient Egypt in 450 BC wrote that "the Egyptians are also the first who reported the doctrine that the soul of man is immortal, and that when the body dies, the soul enters into another creature which chances then to be coming to the birth, and when it has gone the round of all the creatures of land and sea and of the air, it enters again into a human body as it comes to the birth; and that it makes this round in a period of three thousand years. This doctrine certain Hellenes adopted, some earlier and some later, as if it were of their own invention".......... from an account of Egypt by Herodotus.

This and other ancient African concepts is where religions copied the concept afterlife but corrupted it to frighten the masses to obedience to pay their tithes.

NB: This post has been escalated on my blog. For more information, see Death does not exist- there's no end, life has no end https://www.africason.com/2025/03/death-doesnt-exist-theres-no-end-life.html
Re: I Want To Leave My Marriage Because My Husband Is Weak by Honeydenz(f): 8:47pm On Feb 19, 2025
yaseer111:
don't pretend that u didn't miss his sexk
Sex is one of the cheapest things made available for a woman. Maybe for a man. But for a woman, Dicks are as common as Sachet water
Re: I Want To Leave My Marriage Because My Husband Is Weak by WantsandMore: 9:10pm On Feb 19, 2025
Kobojunkie:
You are not aware of this simple fact of life at this point in your growth? undecided
ehn do you not recognize life is a bit more complicated than simplistic?
Re: I Want To Leave My Marriage Because My Husband Is Weak by Kobojunkie: 9:12pm On Feb 19, 2025
WantsandMore:
ehn do you not recognize life is a bit more complicated than simplistic?
Life is actually the opposite of what you think. We are instead to blame for assuming or concluding it complicated and mostly because of the human ego. undecided
Re: I Want To Leave My Marriage Because My Husband Is Weak by ultraviolet27(f): 9:29pm On Feb 19, 2025
All those idiots saying introduce him to your business and get him another car and let him flip it blah blah blah is it that they are dumb or blind to read?she mentioned it severally in her story she got him a Keke napep a Camry for Uber yet he couldn't still manage it and make it profitable even she said they did joint businesses and the husband still ran it to loss and even they were even into okrika buisness yet nothing to show for it.

Yet you still want her to introduce him to another?is until she becomes wretched and wrecked totally you will pity why una wicked like this? you wan make she kpai? anyone is free to leave a toxic marriage no matter each side of the stories of either spouses combined even if it's a man who created this thread it is still the same advice I will give him no one come this life come suffer.

And being a single woman isn't the worst thing to happen to any lady as I read of someone advising her up there what of those women who are widowed?did they follow their husbands to the grave if she never had being married won't she have still survived? single previously married women like Ini Edo,Funke Akindele,Toke makinwa are living their best lives and you are gaslighting a woman to stay in an unfulfilled,draining marriage.

How many Nigerian men even contribute fully financially to their homes upkeep and won't still spill some of the bills with their wives?yet they won't assist her with any house chores,kids homework, school runs etc and you expect the wife to function normally?whereas if they are married to foreign women they will adjust and do house chores it is when Nigerian wives are involved they remember they are heads of the family and supreme overlords!!
Re: I Want To Leave My Marriage Because My Husband Is Weak by Kobojunkie: 9:33pm On Feb 19, 2025
tctrills:
If you were wise, you would have read at least one of the papers before you continued with the argument. Oga since you are too lazy, let's not insult ourselves, just go.
sad It is always the way you lot confidently beat your chests over your blatant ignorance that makes me wonder why! ***shudder***
Re: I Want To Leave My Marriage Because My Husband Is Weak by ultraviolet27(f): 9:41pm On Feb 19, 2025
idahme:
Isn't this your story what men face everyday and most women down play men's efforts? Madam settle your issues, you knew he was struggling with his finances and went ahead, its only a man that can feed a jobless woman for 50 years without complaining and divorcing her o doubt if any woman can do that.

You want us to tell you tto leave your husband because his finances aren't checking up? Madam any decision you want to taake do and the society will still go. On
So those men that goes through what you said do they also bleed every month,get pregnant and birth kids coupled with doing house chores,school runs,,kids assignment etc even those men you mentioned you men how many percentages of them are the overall bread winners without their wives also contributing some?
Maybe only the extremely wealthy 5% top echelon men in Nigeria and those ones don't even burden their wives with house chores since they can afford paid people to do it(chefs,laundry men,cleaners) and even buy state of the art home appliances to help their wives do most chores(dish washer,washing machine etc).
Re: I Want To Leave My Marriage Because My Husband Is Weak by WantsandMore: 9:41pm On Feb 19, 2025
Kobojunkie:
Life is actually the opposite of what you think. We are instead to blame for assuming or concluding it complicated and mostly because of the human ego. undecided
I like how you recognize the inconsistency despite your rationale
Re: I Want To Leave My Marriage Because My Husband Is Weak by Kobojunkie: 9:43pm On Feb 19, 2025
WantsandMore:
I like how you recognize the inconsistency despite your rationale
I did no such thing as you claim since I instead explained that Life isn't to blame for your chosen perception of it. That you have chosen to place your ego before reason does not mean that Life is influenced by your ego. undecided

If you want to learn how to control or stop thoughts — barring the existence of any mental illness, that is— then I suggest you study the life of Buddhist monks. They are humans like you. undecided
Re: I Want To Leave My Marriage Because My Husband Is Weak by tctrills: 9:47pm On Feb 19, 2025
Kobojunkie:
sad It is always the way you lot confidently beat your chests over your blatant ignorance that makes me wonder why! ***shudder***
You have left the topic to start discussing me. Your obsession with me is not healthy. Please return to the topic and stop making me your topic.
Re: I Want To Leave My Marriage Because My Husband Is Weak by Kobojunkie: 9:49pm On Feb 19, 2025
mclloyd22:
➜I see alot of men advising you to walk out of your marriage not know how long and time you have invested, so that can have space to Bleep you and turn you to a single mother. My advice to you is Be careful of what decision you take so it doesn’t affect you kids and you.
But OP already lives as a single mother while maintaining a dick — her husband. She told you in her OP that she pays for everything including him. huh
Re: I Want To Leave My Marriage Because My Husband Is Weak by Kobojunkie: 9:52pm On Feb 19, 2025
lendahand:
that's why a woman is a weaker vessel. She faints at the sight of a cockroach. A man provides for the family without complaining because God has made it so when both humans were cursed in Eden, it's the natural responsibility of a man and he's built to do that. A woman's role is to carry and birth children, then support the man. Whenever the whole load rests on a woman, push has come to shove and the square peg will be easily identified in a round hole. It is very natural for a woman to complain when left to fit into a man's position.
This one brain never find im bearing at all in this life! 😂😂😂😂
Re: I Want To Leave My Marriage Because My Husband Is Weak by Kobojunkie: 9:56pm On Feb 19, 2025
96ACE:
➜I don’t want to comment on this post but with this comment you just dropped, I think you’re being very immature here.
➜For how long have you even catered for your household responsibilities that you brought the matter to an online forum? God gave you a cool headed husband and you want to turn him into a tiger because you can’t live peacefully with your neighbors. Why can’t you be like your husband and overlook some things? Do you always have to react to everything? So because you can’t sleep your husband should also develop high bp and kill himself? You don’t have any problem except for the negative thoughts and advices you have saturated your mind with.
You Christians and parking it is all as God of Christianity's fault is inseparable! 🙄🙄

So, the Christian God is the reason why OP ended up with a man who basically weaponized incompetence against her abi? The God of Christianity is to blame for all of the anxiety and depression —suicidal ideations as a symptom —that OP confesses she has been suffering in her marriage. WOW.... What a terrible God of Christianity he must be. OP, you better run away from that God as he has nothing good in store for you. undecided
Re: I Want To Leave My Marriage Because My Husband Is Weak by Exceed15: 10:06pm On Feb 19, 2025
You think is Greener on the other side?...
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