₦airaland Forum

I want to see rebel Wilson, Jonah hill, Seth MacFarlane, mark wahlberg. Seth rogen, James Franco in one film

armadeo:
The substance.

Not a fan of any sort of horror but I watched this in morbid fascination and disgust.

Still I couldn't stop watching. Like seeing a snake swallow live prey it's horrifying yet you can't but look.

Abdul would have got some eye candy on this one .

All in all I see why the movie made raves it's very good.

9/10 still disgusted

I've you seen a snake swallow a live prey before

No wonder this got cancelled. It looks really bad
https://www.instagram.com/cbrofficialpage/reel/DG3X39WPB1c/

🍜🍝

bisqit:
I've you seen a snake swallow a live prey before

There's lots of videos of snakes eating stuff while the stuff struggles and slides down the throat.

abduleez1:
None of them actress looked eye candy to me tho, even Margaret Qually.

Monstro elisasue was a sight to behold. She looked at herself and flinched. Lol.

As for Maggie read everything was prosthetic.

The scene where I was da Bleep demi nude Naaaah. And truly it was nah

Eros (2004)


An anthology film consisting of three short segments: The Hand directed by Wong Kar-wai in Mandarin, Equilibrium by Steven Soderbergh in English, and The Dangerous Thread of Things by Michelangelo Antonioni in Italian. Each segment addresses the themes of love and sex.

Baddestguyp:
Eros (2004)


An anthology film consisting of three short segments: The Hand directed by Wong Kar-wai in Mandarin, Equilibrium by Steven Soderbergh in English, and The Dangerous Thread of Things by Michelangelo Antonioni in Italian. Each segment addresses the themes of love and sex.

Movie 1: The Hand


Synopsis:
"Zhang, a shy tailor's assistant, is riveted by his imperious client Miss Hua. Upon meeting her, she seduces him to make sure he will truly remember her when designing her garments, and a rapport soon develops between the two."


This movie na pure grooming...but it's done by a woman. The title sef is cheeky: "The Hand" abi the handjôb

Baddestguyp:
Eros (2004)


An anthology film consisting of three short segments: The Hand directed by Wong Kar-wai in Mandarin, Equilibrium by Steven Soderbergh in English, and The Dangerous Thread of Things by Michelangelo Antonioni in Italian. Each segment addresses the themes of love and sex.

Movie 2: Equilibrium


Synopsis:
"A short movie directed by Steven Soderbergh, where the story focuses on a stressed advertising executive (played by Robert Downey Jr.) who recounts a recurring dream about a beautiful naked woman to his unhelpful psychiatrist (Alan Arkin), exploring the complexities of desire and the disconnect between fantasy and reality within the confines of a therapy session."

Kramer vs. Kramer (1979)

A story of love, loss and the fight for what truly matters....

There is a certain ambience that comes with watching films from yesteryears devoid of agendas, unnecessary wokeness, unwarranted pandering, or stories you’d forget five seconds after the end credits. No, these films get straight to business, extremely well-written narratives and magical, good old-fashioned acting. And this film is one of those…

Ted Kramer walks in after a random workday, having just landed an important account and a job promotion, bursting with excitement only for Joanna Kramer, his wife of eight years, to drop a bombshell: she’s leaving him and their young son, with no apparent reason at the time...

What follows is a marital back-and-forth, a messy divorce, and a gladiator battle for the custody of their son.

This film is carried heavily by the pungent performances of the cast. Leading the charge was a very young Dustin Hoffman as Ted Kramer a brilliantly written character, with flawless development as the story progressed. He started out as a workaholic middle-aged man, unburdened by the nuances of family life. But as the film went along, his character shifted from an ambitious career man to a single father, no longer fixated on climbing the corporate ladder but instead fighting to be right there in his son’s life. There was a monologue he gave in court during the custody battle that stuck with me, just top-tier acting. No surprise he scooped Best Actor at the Oscars that year.

I think, divorce is such a taboo here, given how it tears families apart, with the children bearing the brunt of it. Many couples would rather stick it out in a loveless marriage, hoping it gets better, than endure the rigors of a divorce.

This was the highest grossing film that year, sweeping five Oscars, including Best Picture. This is what a Best Picture film should look like.
Special… Special… film. ✨

8/10.

How is this already online?

phr0nesis:
How is this already online?

leaked. The official digital version is set for release April 22nd..The BO returns has stalled recently and the film is struggling to break even so Disney didn't bother much to keep this under wraps....

phr0nesis:
How is this already online?

Leaks....Disney pics seems to be becoming easier to get these days.

I had MUFASA since like the second week or so of January but without the end credits. I thought it was too good to be true but it was the actual complete movie. Tho, I haven't watched it yet, I've had the film for over a month before it's digital release begun getting to most sites.

abduleez1:
Leaks....Disney pics seems to be becoming easier to get these days.

I had MUFASA since like the second week or so of January but without the end credits. I thought it was too good to be true but it was the actual complete movie. Tho, I haven't watched it yet, I've had the film for over a month before it's digital release begun getting to most sites.

oyaskii:
leaked. The official digital version is set for release April 22nd..The BO returns has stalled recently and the film is struggling to break even so Disney didn't bother much to keep this under wraps....

Disney is slacking recently
The Disney before 2022 would lock this up for at least 2 months, irrespective of box office performance. I'll feast nonetheless

phr0nesis:
How is this already online?

Does it even matter?

Who is gonna watch it anyway?

I didn't waste my money on it in the cinema. Now that it has leaked online, I still won't waste my date or 2 hours watching it.

There are better movies/series worth my time

oyaskii:
Kramer vs. Kramer (1979)

A story of love, loss and the fight for what truly matters....

There is a certain ambience that comes with watching films from yesteryears devoid of agendas, unnecessary wokeness, unwarranted pandering, or stories you’d forget five seconds after the end credits. No, these films get straight to business, extremely well-written narratives and magical, good old-fashioned acting. And this film is one of those…

Ted Kramer walks in after a random workday, having just landed an important account and a job promotion, bursting with excitement only for Joanna Kramer, his wife of eight years, to drop a bombshell: she’s leaving him and their young son, with no apparent reason at the time...

What follows is a marital back-and-forth, a messy divorce, and a gladiator battle for the custody of their son.

This film is carried heavily by the pungent performances of the cast. Leading the charge was a very young Dustin Hoffman as Ted Kramer a brilliantly written character, with flawless development as the story progressed. He started out as a workaholic middle-aged man, unburdened by the nuances of family life. But as the film went along, his character shifted from an ambitious career man to a single father, no longer fixated on climbing the corporate ladder but instead fighting to be right there in his son’s life. There was a monologue he gave in court during the custody battle that stuck with me, just top-tier acting. No surprise he scooped Best Actor at the Oscars that year.

I think, divorce is such a taboo here, given how it tears families apart, with the children bearing the brunt of it. Many couples would rather stick it out in a loveless marriage, hoping it gets better, than endure the rigors of a divorce.

This was the highest grossing film that year, sweeping five Oscars, including Best Picture. This is what a Best Picture film should look like.
Special… Special… film. ✨

8/10.

You're so right. When movies sucked you in and you're lost in them for the duration. This one is very good.

Dustin also did the graduate it's one movie I'm going to see someday. It was epic in its time.

Another good oldie is the goodbye girl starring Richard dreyfuss simple rom com. You should see it. Highly recommended.

Baddestguyp:
Does it even matter?

Who is gonna watch it anyway?

I didn't waste my money on it in the cinema. Now that it has leaked online, I still won't waste my date or 2 hours watching it.

There are better movies/series worth my time

My expectation for this movie is low, but not low enough for me to avoid it.

phr0nesis:
My expectation for this movie is low, but not low enough for me to avoid it.

Movie is average

phr0nesis:
My expectation for this movie is low, but not low enough for me to avoid it.

In my opinion, there are way better movies that offer better value to your time...both old and newer movies...

But it's your choice...

In the past, I used to make it a thing to force myself to watch almost every major blockbuster just to keep up...

Nowadays I don't torture myself anymore...

Baddestguyp:
In my opinion, there are way better movies that offer better value to your time...both old and newer movies...

But it's your choice...

In the past, I used to make it a thing to force myself to watch almost every major blockbuster just to keep up...

Nowadays I don't torture myself anymore...

I didn't watch The Marvels, Kraven, Barbie, Morbius, Wicked, Venom 3, every recent blockbuster animation etc. I skip a lot of movies, but I'm watching this because the Captain America trilogy has been my second favourite MCU series after The Avengers series.

Badca81:
Movie is average

I expect it to be.

[/b]Breath of Life (2023)

Last December, I decided to dive into some of Nollywood’s most acclaimed movies to see what the hype was all about. Two films stood out from 2023: Breath of Life and A Tribe Called Judah. Both were commercial and critical darlings, so I downloaded them, ready to be impressed.

Breath of Life swept the Nigerian Oscars, winning Best Supporting Actress, Best Supporting Actor, Trailblazer Award, Best Lead Actor, Best Director, and—most importantly—Best Movie. With all those accolades and glowing reviews, I thought, “At the very least, this movie will be passable.”

Oh, how wrong I was.

Breath of Life is set in Nigeria between (I think?) 1960 and 1995. It follows Timi, a man who was once the epitome of perfection but is now a recluse after a series of tragedies shattered his faith. Enter Elijah, a wide-eyed, asthmatic graduate who returns to his village (??) in search of employment and dreams of becoming a man of God. He lands a job as a houseboy for Timi, and the two form an unlikely father-son bond that culminates in a Christ-like sacrifice. Oh, and there’s a romantic subplot thrown in for good measure. The film tackles themes like grief, love, found family, justice, injustice, loss of faith, and reconciliation with God. Sounds deep, right? Well, it’s not.

The Positives

Let’s start with the good stuff because, honestly, there isn’t much. The acting is solid—no surprise, given all the awards it won. The movie also attempts something ambitious: recreating Nigeria between 1960 and 1990. This is no small feat. Where do you find authentic cars, houses, and fashion from that era? How do you avoid accidentally capturing modern-day elements that break the immersion? Hollywood, with its massive budgets, can pull this off with elaborate sets, props, and color grading. Nollywood, with its limited resources, deserves some credit for trying. It doesn’t fully succeed, but hey, at least they dared to be different.

The music isn’t terrible either. Most of the tracks fit the scenes, though I wish they’d used more music from the 1950s to 1990s to really sell the time period. And visually, the movie is gorgeous. The colors pop, and it’s nice to look at—when you’re not bored out of your mind.

The Not-So-Positives
Let’s get into the real issues, starting with the pacing. This movie is almost two hours long, but it feels like 10. Scenes drag on forever, subplots are left unresolved, and by the halfway point, I was taking breaks every 5 minutes.

Then there’s the plot. The main story isn’t particularly interesting, but the church subplot? Oh, that left me baffled. Here’s the gist: Elijah wants to be a pastor and stumbles upon an abandoned church that Timi used to lead. He cleans it up and starts hosting prayer meetings, hoping to eventually turn it into a full-fledged church. But wait—his girlfriend’s dad wants the land! He has even paid off the land use charge (a whopping 49 million naira) to demolish the church and build… something. So Elijah and his girlfriend start fundraising to save the church.

To me, and this is extremely ridiculous. First, why is a state government land accruing land use charges? That makes zero sense. Second, why is Elijah so attached to this church? It’s been abandoned for years, and he had only just started using it for prayer meetings—not even Sunday services! Why not move the meetings elsewhere? In 1995, you could buy land for less than 10,000 naira (Elijah raised more than that), so why not just relocate? The whole subplot feels forced and nonsensical.

And don’t get me started on the morality angle. Elijah repeatedly insists he’s saving himself for marriage, but then he’s seduced by his girlfriend, which somehow leads to his incurable lung disease worsening. The movie seems to imply that his illness is divine punishment for giving in to temptation, but it never explores or even acknowledges this idea. So why include it?

Final Thoughts

Breath of Life is, at best, mediocre and, at worst, a boring slog. It took me three months to finish this movie, and by the end, I was left wondering: Why did this win so many awards? If this is the best Nollywood has to offer, what does that say about the films that lost to it? Or the ones that weren’t even nominated?

Nollywood, we have to do better. We can’t keep celebrating mediocrity.

Rating: 2/10

Gmajor:
[/b]Breath of Life (2023)

Final Thoughts

Breath of Life is, at best, mediocre and, at worst, a boring slog. It took me three months to finish this movie, and by the end, I was left wondering: Why did this win so many awards? If this is the best Nollywood has to offer, what does that say about the films that lost to it? Or the ones that weren’t even nominated?

Nollywood, we have to do better. We can’t keep celebrating mediocrity.

Rating: 2/10

3 months to finish a 2-hour movie? This had me passed out 😂🤣😂
When I read you were taking breaks, I didn't know you meant full vacations 😁

armadeo:
You're so right. When movies sucked you in and you're lost in them for the duration. This one is very good.

Dustin also did the graduate it's one movie I'm going to see someday. It was epic in its time.

Another good oldie is the goodbye girl starring Richard dreyfuss simple rom com. You should see it. Highly recommended.

You had me at Rom Com..... I'm already there!...thanks for the recommendation...you are far too kind sir.

God!!! I’ve just been released from Aunty Spammy’s jail at last, i still don’t know what I dif😭😭😭

When Harry Met Sally (1989)

The charm of When Harry Met Sally lies in its simplicity. It's not trying to be flashy or overly dramatic, which makes it feel so much more authentic. It gives us a philosophical, comical take on love and friendship, all while exploring the age-old question: Can men and women really just be friends?

It's practically a perfect movie to me. Laugh out loud funny, relatable, timeless, authentic, and incredibly well acted. I'll give it some time, but I feels like it's other there with my favorite films of all time in terms of how much I loved it. I only wish I could watch it for the first time again.

10/10

Kaycee7:
3 months to finish a 2-hour movie? This had me passed out 😂🤣😂
When I read you were taking breaks, I didn't know you meant full vacations 😁

Every Nollywood movie is a 6/10 before I even watch it and it never increases but reduces

Gmajor:
[/b]Breath of Life (2023)

Last December, I decided to dive into some of Nollywood’s most acclaimed movies to see what the hype was all about. Two films stood out from 2023: Breath of Life and A Tribe Called Judah. Both were commercial and critical darlings, so I downloaded them, ready to be impressed.

Breath of Life swept the Nigerian Oscars, winning Best Supporting Actress, Best Supporting Actor, Trailblazer Award, Best Lead Actor, Best Director, and—most importantly—Best Movie. With all those accolades and glowing reviews, I thought, “At the very least, this movie will be passable.”

Oh, how wrong I was.

Breath of Life is set in Nigeria between (I think?) 1960 and 1995. It follows Timi, a man who was once the epitome of perfection but is now a recluse after a series of tragedies shattered his faith. Enter Elijah, a wide-eyed, asthmatic graduate who returns to his village (??) in search of employment and dreams of becoming a man of God. He lands a job as a houseboy for Timi, and the two form an unlikely father-son bond that culminates in a Christ-like sacrifice. Oh, and there’s a romantic subplot thrown in for good measure. The film tackles themes like grief, love, found family, justice, injustice, loss of faith, and reconciliation with God. Sounds deep, right? Well, it’s not.

The Positives

Let’s start with the good stuff because, honestly, there isn’t much. The acting is solid—no surprise, given all the awards it won. The movie also attempts something ambitious: recreating Nigeria between 1960 and 1990. This is no small feat. Where do you find authentic cars, houses, and fashion from that era? How do you avoid accidentally capturing modern-day elements that break the immersion? Hollywood, with its massive budgets, can pull this off with elaborate sets, props, and color grading. Nollywood, with its limited resources, deserves some credit for trying. It doesn’t fully succeed, but hey, at least they dared to be different.

The music isn’t terrible either. Most of the tracks fit the scenes, though I wish they’d used more music from the 1950s to 1990s to really sell the time period. And visually, the movie is gorgeous. The colors pop, and it’s nice to look at—when you’re not bored out of your mind.

The Not-So-Positives
Let’s get into the real issues, starting with the pacing. This movie is almost two hours long, but it feels like 10. Scenes drag on forever, subplots are left unresolved, and by the halfway point, I was taking breaks every 5 minutes.

Then there’s the plot. The main story isn’t particularly interesting, but the church subplot? Oh, that left me baffled. Here’s the gist: Elijah wants to be a pastor and stumbles upon an abandoned church that Timi used to lead. He cleans it up and starts hosting prayer meetings, hoping to eventually turn it into a full-fledged church. But wait—his girlfriend’s dad wants the land! He has even paid off the land use charge (a whopping 49 million naira) to demolish the church and build… something. So Elijah and his girlfriend start fundraising to save the church.

To me, and this is extremely ridiculous. First, why is a state government land accruing land use charges? That makes zero sense. Second, why is Elijah so attached to this church? It’s been abandoned for years, and he had only just started using it for prayer meetings—not even Sunday services! Why not move the meetings elsewhere? In 1995, you could buy land for less than 10,000 naira (Elijah raised more than that), so why not just relocate? The whole subplot feels forced and nonsensical.

And don’t get me started on the morality angle. Elijah repeatedly insists he’s saving himself for marriage, but then he’s seduced by his girlfriend, which somehow leads to his incurable lung disease worsening. The movie seems to imply that his illness is divine punishment for giving in to temptation, but it never explores or even acknowledges this idea. So why include it?

Final Thoughts

Breath of Life is, at best, mediocre and, at worst, a boring slog. It took me three months to finish this movie, and by the end, I was left wondering: Why did this win so many awards? If this is the best Nollywood has to offer, what does that say about the films that lost to it? Or the ones that weren’t even nominated?

Nollywood, we have to do better. We can’t keep celebrating mediocrity.

Rating: 2/10

I disagree........ I enjoyed the movie because I decided to keep my brain outside my body and watch the whole movie as if I was in a trance. Last Nollywood film I ever watched. I'm not going back again no matter the awards any of the insult to movies Nollywood makes

Funny how I was even considering this movie and Nollywood at large and about to even ask Oyaskii to give me his picks for Nollywood recent bests.
I sent this movie to our smart TV yesterday and later in the night saw my pops watching it....the few first several minutes I watched while taking a glance or two gave no confidence and I was shaking my head a bit. Especially that scene where dem just dey shoot pastor abi na who, riddle am with bullets.

I begin dey ask myself say shey na wetin I wan use my scarce time watch be dis??

But the thing is watching Nollywood film, na to shift your expectations and brain ans Hollywood standard go one side.
And infuse the Nigerian-ness in all its glory. 😅😅

Gmajor:
[/b]Breath of Life (2023)

Last December, I decided to dive into some of Nollywood’s most acclaimed movies to see what the hype was all about. Two films stood out from 2023: Breath of Life and A Tribe Called Judah. Both were commercial and critical darlings, so I downloaded them, ready to be impressed.

Breath of Life swept the Nigerian Oscars, winning Best Supporting Actress, Best Supporting Actor, Trailblazer Award, Best Lead Actor, Best Director, and—most importantly—Best Movie. With all those accolades and glowing reviews, I thought, “At the very least, this movie will be passable.”

Oh, how wrong I was.

Breath of Life is set in Nigeria between (I think?) 1960 and 1995. It follows Timi, a man who was once the epitome of perfection but is now a recluse after a series of tragedies shattered his faith. Enter Elijah, a wide-eyed, asthmatic graduate who returns to his village (??) in search of employment and dreams of becoming a man of God. He lands a job as a houseboy for Timi, and the two form an unlikely father-son bond that culminates in a Christ-like sacrifice. Oh, and there’s a romantic subplot thrown in for good measure. The film tackles themes like grief, love, found family, justice, injustice, loss of faith, and reconciliation with God. Sounds deep, right? Well, it’s not.

The Positives

Let’s start with the good stuff because, honestly, there isn’t much. The acting is solid—no surprise, given all the awards it won. The movie also attempts something ambitious: recreating Nigeria between 1960 and 1990. This is no small feat. Where do you find authentic cars, houses, and fashion from that era? How do you avoid accidentally capturing modern-day elements that break the immersion? Hollywood, with its massive budgets, can pull this off with elaborate sets, props, and color grading. Nollywood, with its limited resources, deserves some credit for trying. It doesn’t fully succeed, but hey, at least they dared to be different.

The music isn’t terrible either. Most of the tracks fit the scenes, though I wish they’d used more music from the 1950s to 1990s to really sell the time period. And visually, the movie is gorgeous. The colors pop, and it’s nice to look at—when you’re not bored out of your mind.

The Not-So-Positives
Let’s get into the real issues, starting with the pacing. This movie is almost two hours long, but it feels like 10. Scenes drag on forever, subplots are left unresolved, and by the halfway point, I was taking breaks every 5 minutes.

Then there’s the plot. The main story isn’t particularly interesting, but the church subplot? Oh, that left me baffled. Here’s the gist: Elijah wants to be a pastor and stumbles upon an abandoned church that Timi used to lead. He cleans it up and starts hosting prayer meetings, hoping to eventually turn it into a full-fledged church. But wait—his girlfriend’s dad wants the land! He has even paid off the land use charge (a whopping 49 million naira) to demolish the church and build… something. So Elijah and his girlfriend start fundraising to save the church.

To me, and this is extremely ridiculous. First, why is a state government land accruing land use charges? That makes zero sense. Second, why is Elijah so attached to this church? It’s been abandoned for years, and he had only just started using it for prayer meetings—not even Sunday services! Why not move the meetings elsewhere? In 1995, you could buy land for less than 10,000 naira (Elijah raised more than that), so why not just relocate? The whole subplot feels forced and nonsensical.

And don’t get me started on the morality angle. Elijah repeatedly insists he’s saving himself for marriage, but then he’s seduced by his girlfriend, which somehow leads to his incurable lung disease worsening. The movie seems to imply that his illness is divine punishment for giving in to temptation, but it never explores or even acknowledges this idea. So why include it?

Final Thoughts

Breath of Life is, at best, mediocre and, at worst, a boring slog. It took me three months to finish this movie, and by the end, I was left wondering: Why did this win so many awards? If this is the best Nollywood has to offer, what does that say about the films that lost to it? Or the ones that weren’t even nominated?

Nollywood, we have to do better. We can’t keep celebrating mediocrity.

Rating: 2/10

Illusioneffect:
God!!! I’ve just been released from Aunty Spammy’s jail at last, i still don’t know what I dif😭😭😭

When Harry Met Sally (1989)

The charm of When Harry Met Sally lies in its simplicity. It's not trying to be flashy or overly dramatic, which makes it feel so much more authentic. It gives us a philosophical, comical take on love and friendship, all while exploring the age-old question: Can men and women really just be friends?

It's practically a perfect movie to me. Laugh out loud funny, relatable, timeless, authentic, and incredibly well acted. I'll give it some time, but I feels like it's other there with my favorite films of all time in terms of how much I loved it. I only wish I could watch it for the first time again.

10/10

The Godfather of all modern rom coms..


Insanely jealous of you, if this was your first time seeing it 😩.

Such a top shelf film ✨

abduleez1:
Funny how I was even considering this movie and Nollywood at large and about to even ask Oyaskii to give me his picks for Nollywood recent bests.
I sent this movie to our smart TV yesterday and later in the night saw my pops watching it....the few first several minutes I watched while taking a glance or two gave no confidence and I was shaking my head a bit. Especially that scene where dem just dey shoot pastor abi na who, riddle am with bullets.

I begin dey ask myself say shey na wetin I wan use my scarce time watch be dis??

But the thing is watching Nollywood film, na to shift your expectations and brain ans Hollywood standard go one side.
And infuse the Nigerian-ness in all its glory. 😅😅

I see baba review since but i neva get energy 😩😂.

lol i saw it on the Christmas morning of 2023 so that might have added to the fuzzy euphoria 😩.

The movie had it's flaws, but absolutely no way it was a 2/10, believe me there are much worse, worse flicks in Nollywood than this.

oyaskii:
You had me at Rom Com..... I'm already there!...thanks for the recommendation...you are far too kind sir.

You're welcome bro.