₦airaland Forum

LawWithEbele:
Vanguard, 7th April edition, reported how a wedding was called off because the bride allegedly refused to follow the groom to his church. Both were Christians but of different denominations.

This is a sober reminder of the need to address certain issues before saying “I do.”
Don’t assume all is well just because you’re in love. Infatuation fades, but the issues you ignore today may become the cracks in your marriage tomorrow.

Ask the hard questions:

What church will we both attend?

How will we handle finances, joint account or separate?

How involved will in-laws be in our decisions?

What’s our stance on parenting and discipline?

Are we on the same page about roles and expectations in marriage?

Most divorce cases don’t start with big fights. They begin with these “little foxes” that go unchecked and gradually eat away at the foundation.

So what’s your take, must a woman follow her husband to his church? Or should they both find a common ground?

What other important matters do you think couples should settle before tying the knot?

Let’s talk. You just might help someone avoid a broken engagement or a broken home.

We4all:
I have observed that the only thing Nigerians do during dating is to straff. No deep conversations, no future plans, no real time questions. In fact the only questions that pops up is: "did you cheat on me"?

Before you say, Jack Robinson, they get married, then start having issues about stuff they didn't discuss during their dating phase.

For instance, it your partner has a sibling suffering from an ailment, ask questions to know whether the sickness is hereditary and how it could affect your kids. This is common sense, but it seems sense is far from people in relationships.

As for following your husband to his church...well...it is up to the woman to take a stand before saying "I do". Nonetheless, a man has no right to impose his religion or beliefs on his wife. Your wife is your partner and not your slave.

tunapawizzy:
If you like put your woman under your armpit, that thing wey you dey fear ehn if e go happen e go still happen.

bixton:
The major reason why we are even discussing such is because many of us are just a religious people with religious beliefs, systems and practices handed to us.
We have no true relation with God, Jesus Christ and the Holy Spirit though many will claim that they have.

Many are walking and operating under the influence of religious and doctrinal spirits handed down to the churches or ministries we belong to.

Tit4Tat1:
What are you saying!
A woman who's getting married already knows that she must switch church, unless the man doesn't care... These are long standing practices so I don't understand what you mean by you don't think it's fair to expect the woman to just switch church..

InfernoNig:
Honestly, stuff like this is why couples need to stop skipping the real convos before the wedding. Love is great, but it won’t fix deep differences like this. I don’t think it’s fair to expect the woman to just switch churches—marriage should be about compromise, not control. Both need to meet halfway, or it’s gonna be problems down the line.

InfernoNig:
Lol abeg no be every issue be “woke generation” matter. Sometimes, respect na mutual thing — no be by force or old school mentality. If a woman no dey respect you, maybe check yourself too. Everything no be “women bad,” sometimes na the person wey no get sense.

Chummynoni:
Why must husband and wife attend the same church? Which law says that? Some people and stupidity sha.

Goodlady:
I will attend same church or mosque withy husband because of our children. Different places of worship breeds differences in homes.

tunapawizzy:
Jesu oyingbo is different from Jesu Agege

Tommydare:
Them no dey tell person nw. When u marry, u go understand. Ire ooo

emmyN:
But your boss at work can impose his organization's ethics on you! SMH.

You see how you lots have been manipulated? Not bending to your wife's whims and caprices does not imply that you take her for a slave. Rather, you are the boss, the leader, the lord!

Sheffdon:
oga you're talking nonsense

A responsible married woman must respect her husband's choices .

Chikena!

Tommydare:
You go soon understand wetin the guy dey talk when you marry. Dem no dey tell person. Shey na woman u dey carry play. Give them 1 inch and they will go 5. No worry.

We4all:
If you have a female boss, won't she impose her organization's ethics on you too? Will you resist because she is a woman?

InfernoNig:
Read what you wrote again and again and try to understand if it made sense.

tunapawizzy:
Pele o ambassador of married people, anybody with a different opinion and view to yours, it must be that they are unmarried. Stop using force/pressure to keep people in check, let people's true personality show through, it even helps you to identify who is truly for you.