₦airaland Forum

Here’s a beautifully tragic list of degrees you should think twice before studying based on current Realities of Nigeria to study or professionally suffer with style :

1. Zoology – For Greeting Goat “Good Morning” with Certificate
You love animals? In this economy?
Oya go and start goat podcast or apply at our two and a half zoos.
Spoiler: the animals don dey chop better salary pass you.

2. Botany – Where You Study Plantain but Still Can't Plant Success
You’ll learn names of 5,000 leaves.
Meanwhile Mama Rashida is boiling one random leaf behind her kiosk to cure everything from malaria to marriage crisis.
She dey cash out. You dey draw stomata.

3. Linguistics – Speak All the Languages, Still Can't Communicate with Employer
Syntax? Phonology?
Oga, everybody’s on TikTok screaming “Shey you dey whine me ni?” and cashing out.
You go dey analyze sentence structure while dem dey structure mansions.

4. Political Science – For a Career in Angry WhatsApp Broadcasts
You’ll quote Machiavelli.
Your classmate that failed government is now an aide to a governor.
You? You dey moderate debates on Facebook with zero fuel in gen.

5. Geography – Know All the Mountains, Still Can’t Climb Out of Poverty
You’ll know all river basins, yet can’t navigate Lagos traffic.
You’ll calculate rainfall, but landlord go still chase you out when roof leak.

6. French – Bonjour Joblessness, Ça va bien?
You’ll speak French fluently, but the only French you’ll need is in “French fries.”
Unless you dey plan relocate to Togo, bon chance o.

7. Home Economics – Graduate Puff-Puff Engineer
Four years to learn what Aunty Bisi at the roadside already mastered with spoon and pot.
She get customers. You get thesis.


8. Classics – Et tu, Hunger?
You’ll be quoting Julius Caesar while selling suya part-time.
Tell HR you know Latin, and watch them ask if that’s a brand of body lotion.


9. Philosophy – Think Deep, Stay Broke
You’ll spend 4 years debating if man exists.
But when hunger strike, you go confirm say you really do exist... in poverty.


10. Archaeology – The Past Is Gone. Move On.

You’re digging up the past, but Nigeria is trying to bury its history with bulldozers.
Land for excavation? Turned to estate.
You go dig reach pothole and still see nothing.


11. Forestry & Wildlife – Certified Chief of Bush Matters
You want to save forests in a country where bush don turn bandit camp?
You better study "Escape and Survival 101."


12. Transport Management – For Managing Keke and Okada

You’ll learn logistics, scheduling, traffic analysis.
Meanwhile, the real transport bosses are danfo drivers shouting “Oshodi lastma!”
Go dey learn dispatch business o.

13. Education – Na Who Wan Learn Pay Pass
You get first-class in education, yet you dey teach students wey bring iPhone and attitude to class.
Do lesson, collect money. Or go private, become part-time motivational speaker.


14. Fisheries – When Fish Get More Freedom Than You
You dey raise catfish for project.
Alhaji Musa don raise 10 ponds with buckets and is now exporting to UK.
Who really sabi?


15. Peace and Conflict Resolution – For Settling Fight Between You and Reality
Na you go dey calm quarrel down.
But who go calm your landlord when rent due?


16. Psychology – Reading People's Mind While Yours is Crashing
You understand behavior, but not your own emotions when job no come after NYSC.
You sef need therapy.


17. Sociology – Because Protesting is a Career Now
You go from studying society to analyzing ASUU strikes.
Next stop: “Aluta continua” with empty stomach.


18. Religious Studies – For Preaching with Empty Offering Basket
You’ll learn 66 books of the Bible or Study Koran .
But unless you blow, better learn camera work or how to design flyers for crusades.


19. Anatomy – Because Knowing Bones Won’t Build You One
You can name every part of the skull.
But no one will skull you into employment unless you jump ship to medicine.


20. Biochemistry – The Buffer is Your Destiny
You’ll be mixing titrations.
Later you go dey buffer on YouTube looking for “How to learn tech in 3 days.”


21. Microbiology – Studying Bacteria, Becoming Broketeria
You’ll identify pathogens, but can’t detect job offers.
Try baking. At least yeast go work.

22. Agronomy – Farming Theory in a Practical Economy
You studied how to plant maize.
Mama Nkechi did it with vibes.
She bought Toyota. You bought JAMB form again.


23. History & International Studies – Because Knowing Past Won’t Feed You Present
You can list all military coups, but can’t stop the coup happening in your account balance.
History is your friend. But hunger is closer.

24. Chemistry – Chemistry Without Industry
You studied how to make soap, but the only thing foaming is your temper.
Better go learn perfume mixing. Or start selling izal in keg.

25. Archaeology – Digging Nigeria’s Past Inside Present Frustration
You’re searching for artifacts. Nigeria is burying roads and schools.
Dig, you go meet sachet water and cement blocks.

26. Public Administration – For Frustration with Stamp and File
You’ll graduate knowing bureaucracy.
But HR will still ask for CV, birth cert, WAEC, blood group and your village's LGA letter.

27. Tourism & Hospitality – We No Even Tourist Ourselves
You’ll learn global standards of hospitality.
Your only internship? Front desk at “Jesus Is Coming Soon Motel.”


28. Industrial Mathematics – You Dey Solve X, But Your Life is Still Undefined
After graduation, your math will be:
“4 years of studying + 1 year NYSC = 0 income.”
Solve for peace of mind.


29. Cooperative & Rural Development – The Villages Don Pack Go City
You dey plan develop village, but village dey find light.
Flood don wash everything. Better go develop CV.


30. Pure & Applied Physics – Because This Course is Just Applied Wahala
Unless your uncle is in NASA or Elon Musk, abeg, apply yourself elsewhere.
Nigeria no dey apply physics, we dey apply prayers.


Final word?
This list na for cruise, but the pain is real.

If you must study any of these, combine am with sense, skill and small street wisdom.
Because in Nigeria, na survival of the smartest, not the certificated.

Mind you, just because a course is not here doesn't mean it is better than the aforementioned here.

bighorlus:
Thank God I read the last paragraph. 😁 People are cashing out with some of the courses listed.

Kalatium:
I greet you boss

DonAbba:
Its funny but somehow true.
I studied geography and now I am paying for my life, I graduated since 2019 I am still joblessssssss

DonAbba:
Its funny but somehow true.
I studied geography and now I am paying for my life, I graduated since 2019 I am still joblessssssss

DonAbba:
microbiology
Study bacteria and become broketeria
Thats funny

AntiTerrorist:
As a reasonable who want a future for his offerings, would you like your children to study those courses you mentioned?

Davidonkonsults:
Topic should just be "Think twice before studying in Nigeria".