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Marriage Is About Balance, Do You Agree? - Family - Nairaland

Nairaland ForumNairaland GeneralFamilyMarriage Is About Balance, Do You Agree? (604 Views)

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Marriage Is About Balance, Do You Agree? by Nnamdipapa(op): 3:16pm On May 07, 2025
When a wife earns much more than the husband, does the relationship suffer?

I've been married twice.

My first marriage, I was too young and dumb to have conversations before hand about life goals, ideals, things of that nature.

So. Although I have never been interested in the whole housewife arrangement, I ended up with a housewife that didn't cook, clean or put out.

This isn't a knock on the lives of housewives, if that's what you want, there's nothing wrong with that. I'm just saying I was never particularly interested in the arrangement.

This is more about balance.

Relationships are all about balance. You expect to get out at least what you put in.

So when you come home from a hard day at work worried about the implications of the latest round of layoffs and stick a TV dinner in the oven while looking for some clean silverware to eat it with, the resentment starts to build, I don't care who you are.

This time I married a neurologist who earns more than twice what I do -Chris O'leary, Quora.

Does the relationship suffer?

HELL no. Do you know why? Because I make DAMN SURE she knows how much I appreciate her.

Because I jump my ass up in the morning to bring her coffee.

Because I haul my ass home from work to make sure she has something good to eat while she's finishing up her charting.

Because I run to make sure the little things are taken care of, and don't complain, not out of any sense of martyrdom, but because there isn't a damn thing to complain about.

Let's be clear about something. My wife doesn't expect or demand any of these things. I do them for two reasons. One, the more important is they make her happy. Two, the less important is because I learned a big lesson about imbalance from my first marriage, and I'm not going through that kind of misery again!

Could the relationship suffer because of the difference in income? Yup! How? If I was an asshole.

Boy am I glad I'm not an asshole.

Now the question is, when a wife earns more than the husband, does the marriage suffer? As a guy, will you ho out of your way to please a high earning wife who makes more than you do?

https://www.quora.com/When-a-wife-earns-much-more-than-the-husband-does-the-relationship-suffer?no_redirect=1
Re: Marriage Is About Balance, Do You Agree? by Nnamdipapa(op): 3:27pm On May 07, 2025
If my wife makes triple my income, I will make sure food is ready at home and actively participate in home chores.
If I bring all the money, then she does her traditional role of a full time housewife.
Re: Marriage Is About Balance, Do You Agree? by Lighterx: 3:51pm On May 07, 2025
Nnamdipapa:
If my wife makes triple my income, I will make sure food is ready at home and actively participate in home chores.
If I bring all the money, then she does her traditional role of a full time housewife.
4 words
Your life don spoil
Re: Marriage Is About Balance, Do You Agree? by Nnamdipapa(op): 4:10pm On May 07, 2025
Lighterx:
4 words
Your life don spoil
Why is that? You have to give your reasons why you think my life is spoilt.
Re: Marriage Is About Balance, Do You Agree? by JovialJune(f): 4:14pm On May 07, 2025
Lighterx:
4 words
Your life don spoil
You see, NIigerian men are not ready for this conversation, they will never accept a balanced marriage because it's a taboo to their nonexistent self esteem and ego.
Re: Marriage Is About Balance, Do You Agree? by Kobojunkie: 4:27pm On May 07, 2025
JovialJune:
➜You see, NIigerian men are not ready for this conversation, they will never accept a balanced marriage because it's a taboo to their nonexistent self esteem and ego.
Is OP himself ready for the conversation, given the scenarios he posed in his own comment? grin
Nnamdipapa:
If my wife makes triple my income, I will make sure food is ready at home and actively participate in home chores.
If I bring all the money, then she does her traditional role of a full time housewife.
😂😂😂😂
Re: Marriage Is About Balance, Do You Agree? by Nnamdipapa(op): 4:57pm On May 07, 2025
JovialJune:
You see, NIigerian men are not ready for this conversation, they will never accept a balanced marriage because it's a taboo to their nonexistent self esteem and ego.
If a wife is contributing substantially to the finances of the marriage, why not! I am open to a balanced marriage.
Re: Marriage Is About Balance, Do You Agree? by achorladey: 9:46pm On May 07, 2025
If the forces at play is not balanced, it is crisis bound.
Re: Marriage Is About Balance, Do You Agree? by Caaz: 11:04am On May 08, 2025
Singles like us that are not yet married...na God go help us cheesy
Re: Marriage Is About Balance, Do You Agree? by bukatyne(f): 11:41am On May 08, 2025
Kobojunkie:
Is OP himself ready for the conversation, given the scenarios he posed in his own comment? grin😂😂😂😂
cheesy grin

You love trouble!
Re: Marriage Is About Balance, Do You Agree? by Kobojunkie: 6:19pm On May 08, 2025
bukatyne:
cheesy grin You love trouble!
Na lie I talk? According to OP, the woman literally has to make at least 3 times what he makes to get him to submit to doing the same set of chores she does for his measly one part. Does any of that seem balanced to you? 😐😐😐😐
Re: Marriage Is About Balance, Do You Agree? by We4all: 9:18pm On May 08, 2025
Story...Even if their wives is bringing more to the table, more than 90% of Nigerian men will expect them to still be the typical Nigerian wife who does all the home chores. It is laughable if the man is jobless, sits at home all day and still expects his wife to come home and clean or cook for him. African marriage is modernized slavery.
Re: Marriage Is About Balance, Do You Agree? by descarado: 7:29am On May 09, 2025
What about a situation where the wife contributes more?

So many wives are doing this. Both in and outside naija
Re: Marriage Is About Balance, Do You Agree? by descarado: 7:31am On May 09, 2025
Nnamdipapa:
If my wife makes triple my income, I will make sure food is ready at home and actively participate in home chores.
If I bring all the money, then she does her traditional role of a full time housewife.
Easier said than done

Why will she make triple your income?

Abeg shift.
Re: Marriage Is About Balance, Do You Agree? by Nnamdipapa(op): 7:32am On May 09, 2025
descarado:
Easier said than done
I do it now and I earn all the income at home. It is my home.
Re: Marriage Is About Balance, Do You Agree? by Nnamdipapa(op): 2:49am On May 10, 2025
Caaz:
Singles like us that are not yet married...na God go help us cheesy
Will you marry me, I am on the search for a second wife? I am drawn by that your egusi soup.
Re: Marriage Is About Balance, Do You Agree? by DeltaBachelor(m): 6:20am On May 10, 2025
Okay
Re: Marriage Is About Balance, Do You Agree? by Chinny024(f): 1:20pm On May 10, 2025
If there's anything some people regret, it's definitely being married..
Ask them why, they won't say pim...Shey una wan Make same fire consume singles ni...
Share ur experience,they won't share too..
1 Reply

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