₦airaland Forum

Christianoir:
I see people saying you shouldn’t care about what people say but I’ve been trying it not working because people might say bad thing about me and I will start thinking about it for days

How do I get that I don’t care attitude
I know inot possible not to care but at least I don’t want people opinions to weigh we down

How do you guys do it
Please suggest guys
It weighing me down

Seems even you have a low opinion about yourself.
You have changed this by doing things.
Get productive.
Throw this phone away and get busy with work.

Ajebuta lolz, you no get any problems bro!!!!
If you had other plans, ambition or stuffs you are thinking of, what other people say will be the least of your problem..

columbus007:
I am shocked to see someone who's worried about what people really think about him, a d he's here on Nairaland 😅, abeg grow thick skin jare. 🤣.

The OP is a just a phone addict. And that's his problem.
He doesn't s have work and is not doing anything productive. Just sitting down inside room and be worrying from morning to night.

Christianoir:
I see people saying you shouldn’t care about what people say but I’ve been trying it not working because people might say bad thing about me and I will start thinking about it for days

How do I get that I don’t care attitude
I know inot possible not to care but at least I don’t want people opinions to weigh we down

How do you guys do it
Please suggest guys
It weighing me down

It depends on what they're saying about you. If you're a yahoo boy and that's what they're gossiping about you on, then you need to repent. If you’re a prolific fornicator who brings a array of different ladies to sleep with, then you also have to change. Even though I'm not excusing their gossiping, what you're doing is evil and should actually trouble you even if nobody is gossiping about them.

emkz:
I do not seek to be better than anyone. That is a low standard for myself. I rather seek to improve on who I was the day before.

Please, it is riff-raff, not "rift rafts". If I am a riff raft to you, I would never wish to be anything else to you so long as it causes you pain.

Well, I’m glad you have appropriately spelt what you are. That shows you know you are one.😁

Nothing is paining me. I’m just hoping you come back to your senses, for your own good .

Jaycobbs:


Lol. It's hard to explain.

I feel you, though. I struggled with people's opinions of me for decades. But it's a process. It doesn't happen all at once, though there'll be notable milestones where you worry less and about what people think about you.

I saw some things that just made me really pissed off.

Um... I think a big factor is also your background. The words that were used in reference to you as a child matters a lot and forms your personal belief system.

I don't remember who made the statement but there's a popular saying that no one can make you feel bad about yourself or less of yourself without your own approval or permission.

It's not what other people are thinking that's the issue; it's what you subconsciously believe about yourself that's the problem.

There are some things you know that you know that you know, and no one can take that from you.

For instance—I'm 6'1"

No man can insult me that I'm short. Lol. I'll just laugh it off because I KNOW within me that I'm not. Evidence is too much.

No one can insult you or laugh at you that you're a white man, because you KNOW you are not.

That's what self belief looks like. You have to have strong opinions about your sense of self worth.

No one can insult me that I'm dull and then their opinions would move me or make me feel bad. I have academic accolades that say otherwise.

So if someone thinks lowly of you, or if you think they think lowly of you, and that assumption/reality has the ability to change your belief about yourself, the other person isn't the problem—you are.

It can change how you feel about yourself BECAUSE some part of you believe it's true. If no part of you has any negative opinion of yourself, people's thoughts would mean nothing to you.

So you have to begin the long journey of getting to truly know who you are and the value inherent in you; the impact you make in this world. As you develop strong opinions and convictions about your own value, the impact of other people's feelings and assumptions about you start to diminish.

I don't know if this makes sense.

Send me a message on Whatsapp if you wish to talk more.

Hope this helps you. ✌🏻

Cheers.

Please I'll like to talk to you on Whatsapp, can I?

lebete3000:
Please I'll like to talk to you on Whatsapp, can I?

Sure. Go ahead. Happy to help any way I can.

Christianoir:
I see people saying you shouldn’t care about what people say but I’ve been trying it not working because people might say bad thing about me and I will start thinking about it for days

How do I get that I don’t care attitude
I know inot possible not to care but at least I don’t want people opinions to weigh we down

How do you guys do it
Please suggest guys
It weighing me down

Buy (or source) and read the book called:

The Life-Changing magic of not giving a f**k

Not one people pleaser ever made it in life, doesn't mean you should step on or bully people.

I think the solution is finding out the root cause:

Why do you care about what people say about you?

If you can tackle why you care, you can then deal with it.

Some of us grew up lacking validation from our parents whilst some grew up hearing too much validation so our lives are built on it.

Christianoir:
I see people saying you shouldn’t care about what people say but I’ve been trying it not working because people might say bad thing about me and I will start thinking about it for days

How do I get that I don’t care attitude
I know inot possible not to care but at least I don’t want people opinions to weigh we down

How do you guys do it
Please suggest guys
It weighing me down