₦airaland Forum

folake4u:
It's Get them!!!! Nor change am.

I tried so hard to remember o.
How you take know what I wanted to type?
Ehen, Get them!!! 😂😂😂

pocohantas:
I tried so hard to remember o.
How you take know what I wanted to type?
Ehen, Get them!!! 😂😂😂

Lol I just know.

Yessss, you're in the program now.

Mariangeles:
She ready for am gan ni!
Make she sef go vacation for Naija, rest small.

After every, I'm sure the man will be ready to talk.
By then, im body go don calm down.

I'm sure the side-chic he wanted to run to would've fashy'd him with his "excess baggage" by now.
He thought he had sense.

Honestly, if men were more involved with their children, they wouldn't even have time/energy to look at other women.

You no get time, yet you dey do piom piom piom!

Which one be piom, piom, piom? Please many of us are kids on this platform. Don't corrupt us o.

Her loss dough.
But you didn’t try at all. Which other means have you imply other than taking such decision to her table.
How would you feel if your sis husband abandoned her with five kids o. Alaye!
Anyways, you only need to sacrifice your social lifestyles and then focus on the kids. You will be fine at the end.

Kobojunkie:
https://www.msn.com/en-us/family-and-relationships/parenting/man-who-planned-on-leaving-wife-with-their-5-children-surprised-when-she-leaves-him-first/ar-AA1CURA6

casualobserver:
i find this kind of talk nauseating especially coming from a man.

the role of a man is to procreate and provide. the role of a woman is to procreate and nurture. if a woman decides to have other "dreams" outside her role, it is for her to make it work without disturbing the balance in her home.

the children belong to both parents. stop this nonsense of your children. The reality is that in life the children benefit the mother more than the father. most men end up ignored later by the wife and children in life despite having children wherasmost women end up being looked after by their children so stop this emotional gaslighting of "your children".

if you let your wife gaslight you with this "your children" nonsense by the time you find out youve been manipulated and what marraige is really about it will be too late. Most men who live to old age die miserable and with regret despite having children because they didnt prioritize themselves.

Support your wife yes but as a man dont be gaslighted into adding a role that is not yours, life is hard enough for men with little benefits or appreciation.

I wish we could pin comments. This comment is 💯

Dzzzz:
You can see the man was right about the laziness and irresponsible character of the woman cause why leave abroad for Nigeria?..In abroad the man must pay child support so you can see the woman is irresponsible..

No where in the story was the wife said to be lazy and irresponsible.
He wanted to move on to another woman and pay child support right?
She should prove responsibility by staying back to pay child support in your opinion of responsibility.
Money is the core responsibility in raising a child based on yoir assertion, why then is the man complaining since he has money.

JovialJune:
I'm elated 😆

Women should make it a habit to be the visiting parent. In cases of divorce, women should let husband have sole custody and pay for child support, the tide has to turn so that men must understand the sacrifice women do for their kids.

Women can't let the man have custody of the kids because most women need the money from child support to take care of themselves.

dequir:
She ought to be paying child support to the man she left with 5 kids to feed and nurture alone.

She is a real example of an irresponsible and laid back spouse. The husband should sue her if she is eventually traced in Nigeria.

Okay but it would be fine if she had allowed him to go and leave her as he planned.

Kobojunkie:
The courts decide how much is to be paid for upkeep. And it is typically based off of how much one makes/has, etc,. Contrary to aot of what you hear in male dominated circles, it isn't that much even here in the U.S, talk less of UK or Nigeria.

@chopbeleful100.. a man earn $174k before tax and 41% of this money go to ti his ex wife as CS and alimony. CS and alimony is untaxed for the receiver but taxes for the givers. This is the reason western MEN don’t initiate divorce despite the shege they’re seeing (they cook, provide, do laundry, get disrespected and masculinity down the drain, get cheated on and get to raise bastarrd, their women withold sex until the man take our the thrash ) and their wife barely do anything. They know if they initiate divorce despite the shege, they will lose on all front. The women mostly initiate when she’s tired and want to get his money and chance to fvvk other rich without accountability


Western men have it worse the most. The only way you can live in the west without ur self worh being questioned is never procreate, never marry, do protection for urself so ur sperm don’t get to give anyone oregano and never discus this, that way u can enjoy sex without the bs that come after it. Invest in ur looks

Drenix:
Once you are having an Issue with someone and the only thing that person could say is okay and nod his or her head. Forget it. 🤐🤐🤐🤐

Especially a woman

JovialJune:
I'm elated 😆

Women should make it a habit to be the visiting parent. In cases of divorce, women should let husband have sole custody and pay for child support, the tide has to turn so that men must understand the sacrifice women do for their kids.

Lol.. women require custody of the kids for selfish gains. Without that, they won’t have access to child support and social benefits due to such. It’s for their own selfishness not due to any altruism or love of the child. Remove child supper and benefits and women won’t see the need to take sole curstody

Proserpina:

Especially a woman

Screaming!! This is so meee.🤣🤣🤣

What do Men really want. If the Woman ran away with the Children, He will complain that She did not let him have access to his Kids. Now the Woman left the Children for him and he is still complaining. Na Wa

NekaG2233:
Grok is a liar

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
I didn't expect anything more from your kind

irumole1975:
Lol.. women require custody of the kids for selfish gains. Without that, they won’t have access to child support and social benefits due to such. It’s for their own selfishness not due to any altruism or love of the child. Remove child supper and benefits and women won’t see the need to take sole curstody

No problem. At least he has the 5kids now.
She would send him £300/month and he can access those social benefits in addition to it.

Babangidapikin:
I think she did right so you know it's not about sending money ...you want to leave her to go an enjoy with another woman ba.. forgetting someone is ignoring her dreams to raise your kids ...

which dreams does women have any other dream

Esthered:
No where in the story was the wife said to be lazy and irresponsible.
He wanted to move on to another woman and pay child support right?
She should prove responsibility by staying back to pay child support in your opinion of responsibility.
Money is the core responsibility in raising a child based on yoir assertion, why then is the man complaining since he has money.

Read it well..Na me add lazy cause why leave abroad for Nigeria..He said she’s irresponsible..

JovialJune:
I'm elated 😆

Women should make it a habit to be the visiting parent. In cases of divorce, women should let husband have sole custody and pay for child support, the tide has to turn so that men must understand the sacrifice women do for their kids.

Lol .... Women will pay for child support?? Lol ur gender wey sting pass clam wey hold person arm na him wan pay for child support?

Smart woman.

casualobserver:
i find this kind of talk nauseating especially coming from a man.

the role of a man is to procreate and provide. the role of a woman is to procreate and nurture. if a woman decides to have other "dreams" outside her role, it is for her to make it work without disturbing the balance in her home.

the children belong to both parents. stop this nonsense of your children. The reality is that in life the children benefit the mother more than the father. most men end up ignored later by the wife and children in life despite having children wherasmost women end up being looked after by their children so stop this emotional gaslighting of "your children".

if you let your wife gaslight you with this "your children" nonsense by the time you find out youve been manipulated and what marraige is really about it will be too late. Most men who live to old age die miserable and with regret despite having children because they didnt prioritize themselves.

Support your wife yes but as a man dont be gaslighted into adding a role that is not yours, life is hard enough for men with little benefits or appreciation.

Akuko mma Ngozi!
I shudder to think that people who are birthing & going to raise children have warped thinking like this.

I will take your post one by one.

Your 2nd paragraph: where is it written that it's a man's role to provide? Please be specific & let me know. But let's assume it's a man's role, how about homes where the woman is the, joint, major or even the only provider (as it's the case with 90% of homes now) . How do we handle that?
Again, the word "nurture" means something that BOTH parents should offer to the child/ren. The mistake you will make is to think nurture is just about DIRECT breastfeeding which is the only thing I know ONLY a woman can provide.
So there's already a disturbance in the balance you talked about.

Your 3rd paragraph: what reality is it that in life the children benefit the mother more than the father? Or is it something you guys tell yourself so you won't be involved in raising the children?
It takes more than providing sperm & money to be a father. If all mothers did was to only provide the womb & money for the children while you guys also provide the sperm & money as you guys ONLY do , what do you think will happen?
The man in the story is ranting like a bush rat because he probably ONLY provided the sperm. The money was joint. Ask me how I know...

Your 4th paragraph: like how an average Nigerian man suddenly finds the word "manipulative" in their dictionary immediately they get married. The men who didn't get involved in the children's lives die old & miserable & you are pitying them? You shouldn't because they have just paved the way for you to NOT do what they did.


Finally, you are telling men not to be gaslighted into adding a role that is not theirs. You see the problem of marriages these days....people don't really enter with their whole heart. Marriage should be given 100 / 100 by both parties & not 50 / 50. In 50 / 50, you can afford to say, this is my role & this is yours". But in 100 / 100, you are BOTH committed to doing ANYTHING that will make the other happy & strengthen the union. And in this case, even if it means taking up "other roles" as you said.

I rest my case!

Esthered:
Alpha mails left the group chat.

His plan was to saddle her with the responsibility of caring for 5 children but she outsmarted him.

If he was hands on, he would have been able to manage but be overwhelmed. He was a PROVIDER as that's the sole duty in his marriage manual.

I hope it's fiction.

Alpha mails kwa!!!

0/10

Iceberg3:
Alpha mails kwa!!!

0/10

Is there a better word to use? 😁

cococandy:
Oh I wonder why. Probably has nothing to do with them thinking they don’t have a nurturing role in the family.

My dear!

Men delude themselves into thinking nurturing means breastfeeding. How else do you explain how they ALWAYS push the word to us?

Lionnation:
which dreams does women have any other dream

Your sisters don't have dreams?
Your daughters will NEVER dare to dream and chase it.....

Dzzzz:
Read it well..Na me add lazy cause why leave abroad for Nigeria..He said she’s irresponsible..

She's irresponsible because she left him and the children.
He'll be fine. If the new woman loves him like he assumes, let them get married asap as the COAST IS NOW CLEAR.

MissJoy29:
Akuko mma Ngozi!
I shudder to think that people who are birthing & going to raise children have warped thinking like this.

I will take your post one by one.

Your 2nd paragraph: where is it written that it's a man's role to provide? Please be specific & let me know. But let's assume it's a man's role, how about homes where the woman is the, joint, major or even the only provider (as it's the case with 90% of homes now) . How do we handle that?
Again, the word "nurture" means something that BOTH parents should offer to the child/ren. The mistake you will make is to think nurture is just about DIRECT breastfeeding which is the only thing I know ONLY a woman can provide.
So there's already a disturbance in the balance you talked about.

Your 3rd paragraph: what reality is it that in life the children benefit the mother more than the father? Or is it something you guys tell yourself so you won't be involved in raising the children?
It takes more than providing sperm & money to be a father. If all mothers did was to only provide the womb & money for the children while you guys also provide the sperm & money as you guys ONLY do , what do you think will happen?
The man in the story is ranting like a bush rat because he probably ONLY provided the sperm. The money was joint. Ask me how I know...

Your 4th paragraph: like how an average Nigerian man suddenly finds the word "manipulative" in their dictionary immediately they get married. The men who didn't get involved in the children's lives die old & miserable & you are pitying them? You shouldn't because they have just paved the way for you to NOT do what they did.


Finally, you are telling men not to be gaslighted into adding a role that is not theirs. You see the problem of marriages these days....people don't really enter with their whole heart. Marriage should be given 100 / 100 by both parties & not 50 / 50. In 50 / 50, you can afford to say, this is my role & this is yours". But in 100 / 100, you are BOTH committed to doing ANYTHING that will make the other happy & strengthen the union. And in this case, even if it means taking up "other roles" as you said.

I rest my case!

I didn’t read your post because I know people like you and I know the heist of what you are saying before you say it.

Are you happy to have a well playing job and have a man who doesn’t work and stays at home to nurture? Are you happy to fix your car yourself, deal with mechanics yourself etc while your husband sits at home to nurture?

If you are not happy that your husband is not working or fix things around the house, does not handle things like dealing with the mechanic, then it means men have roles and you want a man to perform his role!

Simple!

MissJoy29:
Akuko mma Ngozi!
I shudder to think that people who are birthing & going to raise children have warped thinking like this.

I will take your post one by one.

Your 2nd paragraph: where is it written that it's a man's role to provide? Please be specific & let me know. But let's assume it's a man's role, how about homes where the woman is the, joint, major or even the only provider (as it's the case with 90% of homes now) . How do we handle that?
Again, the word "nurture" means something that BOTH parents should offer to the child/ren. The mistake you will make is to think nurture is just about DIRECT breastfeeding which is the only thing I know ONLY a woman can provide.
So there's already a disturbance in the balance you talked about.

Your 3rd paragraph: what reality is it that in life the children benefit the mother more than the father? Or is it something you guys tell yourself so you won't be involved in raising the children?
It takes more than providing sperm & money to be a father. If all mothers did was to only provide the womb & money for the children while you guys also provide the sperm & money as you guys ONLY do , what do you think will happen?
The man in the story is ranting like a bush rat because he probably ONLY provided the sperm. The money was joint. Ask me how I know...

Your 4th paragraph: like how an average Nigerian man suddenly finds the word "manipulative" in their dictionary immediately they get married. The men who didn't get involved in the children's lives die old & miserable & you are pitying them? You shouldn't because they have just paved the way for you to NOT do what they did.


Finally, you are telling men not to be gaslighted into adding a role that is not theirs. You see the problem of marriages these days....people don't really enter with their whole heart. Marriage should be given 100 / 100 by both parties & not 50 / 50. In 50 / 50, you can afford to say, this is my role & this is yours". But in 100 / 100, you are BOTH committed to doing ANYTHING that will make the other happy & strengthen the union. And in this case, even if it means taking up "other roles" as you said.

I rest my case!

I didn’t read your post because I know people like you and I know the heist of what you are saying before you say it.

Are you happy to have a well playing job and have a man who doesn’t work and stays at home to nurture and has entitlement to your money? Are you happy to fix your car yourself, deal with mechanics, plumbers, electricians etc yourself etc while your husband sits at home to nurture?

If you are not happy that your husband is not working or fix things around the house, does not handle things like dealing with the mechanic, then it means men have roles and despite what you say, you want a man to perform his role! We also want women who know respect and understand their roles. That I do something occasionally does not mean it is my role.

Simple!

Esthered:
Your sisters don't have dreams?
Your daughters will NEVER dare to dream and chase it.....

story for the gods, as if you have one, you can only decieve little kids

folake4u:
Screaming!! This is so meee.🤣🤣🤣

You get?

If I reach that level just know I'm about to go "aura" for "aura".

Na love dey make me shalaye, if I mute just run or do the right thing

1) How many men are making $174k in America?

2) The average child support in the USA is around $700/month. That’s less than $10k a year. Definitely not 41% of $174k.

3) if you’re paying alimony to an ex-spouse, it’s because they were a stay at home parent. Which in most cases is what these men want from their women. A woman who’s sitting at home catering to their needs. Yea you have to pay the cost to be the boss. Women with stay at home husbands pay it too. But trust y’all to be victims and never say the full truth. I know women who are paying alimony to their exes.

4) I love that bit in bold so much. I really agree and hope you keep teaching other guys this way. Stop procreating. Stop marrying. Leave women alone. Statistically the number of happier women (not saddled with deadbeat dads) will explode.

irumole1975:
@chopbeleful100.. a man earn $174k before tax and 41% of this money go to ti his ex wife as CS and alimony. CS and alimony is untaxed for the receiver but taxes for the givers. This is the reason western MEN don’t initiate divorce despite the shege they’re seeing (they cook, provide, do laundry, get disrespected and masculinity down the drain, get cheated on and get to raise bastarrd, their women withold sex until the man take our the thrash ) and their wife barely do anything. They know if they initiate divorce despite the shege, they will lose on all front. The women mostly initiate when she’s tired and want to get his money and chance to fvvk other rich without accountability


Western men have it worse the most. The only way you can live in the west without ur self worh being questioned is never procreate, never marry, do protection for urself so ur sperm don’t get to give anyone oregano and never discus this, that way u can enjoy sex without the bs that come after it. Invest in ur looks

Lionnation:
story for the gods, as if you have one, you can only decieve little kids

Ehya!
I'm a chartered accountant, a banker and a mum of 2 pursuing my DREAMS VIGOROUSLY with my husband's support as my children need not look too far for inspiration in the future.

When I was thinking of slowing down, a senior colleague whose husband works in a top IOC and she goes on vacation abroad often told me to pursue my dreams with the right support system. The babe was promoted last month and awaiting to receive her official car.

Esthered:
She's irresponsible because she left him and the children.
He'll be fine. If the new woman loves him like he assumes, let them get married asap as the COAST IS NOW CLEAR.

See,living abroad demands husband and wife cooperating together as a family..We down here don’t know the real reason behind all this but he said she’s”irresponsible” and that says a lot..Some women,once they abroad they start doing things that is not called for that’s why he chose to breakout..