₦airaland Forum

I AM ASHAMED — Two First Ladies, Two Silences, One Nigeria
By Madam Wahala Reports
I am ashamed.
Not because Nigeria lacks strong women.
Not because Nigeria lacks voices.
But because in the middle of killings, kidnappings, terrorism and banditry, the silence from the highest places is louder than the gunshots.

So let’s talk honestly. Let’s compare two First Ladies — not by fashion, not by grammar, not by class — but by presence, courage, and public empathy.

Patience Jonathan: Mocked, But Present
Many Nigerians laughed at Patience Jonathan when she was First Lady.

They mocked her accent.
They turned her speeches into memes.
They reduced her emotions to jokes.
But history cannot lie.
When the Chibok girls were kidnapped, Patience Jonathan did not hide.

She:
Cried publicly
Called meetings
Spoke to the nation
Kept the issue in the public space
Used her position to force attention on the pain
Yes, her words were sometimes clumsy.
Yes, social media laughed.

But she showed up.
She made it impossible for Nigeria to pretend nothing happened.

She carried the pain loudly — even when it cost her dignity in public opinion.
Her weakness was style.
Her strength was presence.
The Present First Lady: Dignified, But Distant

Today, Nigeria is facing:
Relentless killings
School kidnappings
Terror attacks
Banditry
Communities wiped out
Families destroyed
Yet, what do we mostly see?
Silence.
Not noise.
Not outrage.
Not visible advocacy.

Not national emotional leadership.

This does not mean the current First Lady is a bad person.
But it does mean that her public role in times of national pain feels absent.
We see ceremony.
We see calm.
We see dignity.

But in a country bleeding this much, dignity without voice starts to feel like distance.
The Uncomfortable Question

Let’s be honest:
If Patience Jonathan were still First Lady today, would Nigeria be this quiet emotionally?
Based on her record, the answer is simple: No.
She would have spoken.
She would have cried.
She would have called attention.
She would have made the suffering impossible to ignore.
People might mock her again.
Twitter might trend her again.
But silence would not be our national response.

This Is Bigger Than Two Women
This is not about:
Grammar
Class
Sophistication
Packaging

It is about whether power still feels human.
Nigeria today is worse off in security than it was years ago.

But our public empathy from the top feels weaker.
That is the real shame.

We used to have a First Lady who was imperfect but emotionally present.

Now we have better packaging — but less visible compassion.

Why I Am Ashamed

I am ashamed because:
A nation can be burning and those at the top can remain comfortable
People can be dying and leadership can remain quiet

Fear can spread and empathy can go missing
We can normalize silence in the face of tragedy
Patience Jonathan was mocked — but she stood in the storm.

Today, we have silence — and call it composure.
But let’s be honest:
Silence is not leadership.
Distance is not compassion.

And dignity is not a substitute for courage.
Nigeria does not just need governance.
Nigeria needs visible humanity from those closest to power.
And that is why I say it again:

I am ashamed.
Not of the women.
Not of Nigerians.
But of a system where the country is bleeding, and empathy has gone quiet.

“If our leaders stay silent while the nation bleeds, whose responsibility is it to speak — them or us?”
It’s short

I am ashamed...I am ashamed....I am ashamed..

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Another frustrated and depressed woman

simpleseyi:
Another frustrated and depressed woman

Bwala was was correct after all.

Where are all those who made noise about insecurity during Jonathan's regime?

The insecurity now stinks. Why no noise? What changed?