₦airaland Forum

That's one of the many consequences of the so called civilisation. Our value systems have been eroded greatly and people now live without a sense of community that made life meaningful in the times past. No wonder depression is now so common among people.

hegelian:
And yet our country is in shambles despite all training.. Being responsible has nothing to do with being harsh but rather ability to train a child to accept responsibility and these are learnt by watching elders taking the responsibilities.. The question is do we take them that they will learn from

I completely agree. This is how is perpetuates but how did it start? Did the elders just decide to be irresponsible just because and pass It on? Or is this behaviour and adaptation of how the environment is such as the bad economy, poor infrastructure and social services?

I believe this behaviour developed because our leader never escaped colonialism. They extract from us and we look at them and see this behaviour is rewarded and copy it individually.

Stephen0mozzy:
I was watching a video on YouTube by one wise Nigerian, and he maid one quote



Come to think of the moral decadence of the kids and young adults today, is it really far from the truth? Teens these days do not even have a sense of responsibility or consequence - they have zero respect for authority.

Whe we were growing up, it was not like this with us, there used to be a saying then that "na one person dey born pikin, but na the whole community dey train am" - but these days, you can't even correct a child before their parents rain on you like hawks.

Where did we get it wrong? What can we do to remedy the situation, or atleast the nezt generation?

Share your thoughts.

Are these not pressing issues?

Its the era of woke where we try to adpot foreing ways of raising children in a society where they have little or no responsibility

Emeskhalifa:
Recently in Abuja, EFCC bursted a yahoo academy.

It is no longer a hidden thing, just pray one of your own doesn't end up in that way

Hiaaaaan!!! Yahoo academy??

Ordinary caution and pep talk I gave my neighbors kids after I spotted them both in a dark corner at about 10pm ( ps I didn't see or hear anything sexual infact they drew my attention to their presence after they greeted me) ( I just didn't find it nice that kids of 14yrs would find nowhere else to discuss any discussion other than in a dark alley at that time of the night)


...anyway long story short, The parent of the boy came knocking same night telling me how she's the best mother ever and how she raised her son very godly blablabla and almost turned me to a bad person

Infact the boy told me to my face,'' I didn't like what you did just now!"...14yrs old oh

I just looked to the stars, held my breath and put my arms behind my back make I nor kill person pikin.

.... It's really bad parenting these days, if you keep your kids away from the outside world...you're creating Introverts and that alone is a problem on its own.

Na God dey preutect our sons and daughters 🙏🏻

GloriousGbola:
ironically this is what i have told my eldest son more than once and sometimes the little prick quotes it back at me

I saw this prayer recently:

May we not leave battles for our kids to fight.

I'm trying to do this for my children: please learn from my mistakes and from your father's mistakes.

I'm constantly worried if we've screwed them up because of our foolishness

Ishilove:
The bad parents giving bad parenting also had parents, so can we assume their own parents didn't bring them up well? If I was well brought up, I will pass that same upbringing to my descendants.

k
It isn't so

You people think children and chattel are the same word.

Very few of you "pamper" your children. Most of you fail to provide the absolute basics that would afford a human being a dignified existence.

3

Stephen0mozzy:
I was watching a video on YouTube by one wise Nigerian, and he maid one quote



Come to think of the moral decadence of the kids and young adults today, is it really far from the truth? Teens these days do not even have a sense of responsibility or consequence - they have zero respect for authority.

Whe we were growing up, it was not like this with us, there used to be a saying then that "na one person dey born pikin, but na the whole community dey train am" - but these days, you can't even correct a child before their parents rain on you like hawks.

Where did we get it wrong? What can we do to remedy the situation, or atleast the nezt generation?

Share your thoughts.

Are these not pressing issues?

We are oh
Come my compound children dey mumu wetin no good

Ishilove:
Hiaaaaan!!! Yahoo academy??

https://www.imdb.com/title/tt38623980/

Reporter Tir Dhondy investigates the rise of sextortion scams targeting teenage boys on social media. Her journey leads to Nigeria, where she confronts the scammers taking part in these crimes.

when they are done with oyibo pikin, they will turn to Nigerians - just as it happened with kidnapping

you can look for the documentary to download

you will feel sick

fyzaila:
Those that are pampering their kids into stupidity, I pray that stupidity fall back on the pamperers. Let the well trained ones live peacefully and enjoy all the goodies life has to offer

Your prayer can't be answered because this life no balance.... You'll be surprised to see that the spoilt brat made it in life more than pastor child

GloriousGbola:
https://www.imdb.com/title/tt38623980/



when they are done with oyibo pikin, they will turn to Nigerians - just as it happened with kidnapping

you can look for the documentary to download

you will feel sick

This is just plain evil and disgusting

fyzaila:
Those that are pampering their kids into stupidity, I pray that stupidity fall back on the pamperers. Let the well trained ones live peacefully and enjoy all the goodies life has to offer

The problem is the ones pampered to stupidity will become nuisance to the ones who were properly brought up.

Ishilove:
The problem is the ones pampered to stupidity will become nuisance to the ones who were properly brought up.

That's why I prayed let it fall back on them

Nowadays






mother's and father's took their children to




shrine for Yahoo Yahoo bathroom.

mmsen:
You people think children and chattel are thesame word.

Very few of you "pamper" your children. Most of you fail to provide the absolute basics that would afford a human being a dignified existence.

Probably the only monicker who made sense on this thread

dettolgel:
I agree that the basic standards we learn at home form the foundation on which our individual character is built. But when it comes to parenting, I think it is far more nuanced than we often assume. For example, among the traits you listed, very strict parents are actually the most likely to raise children who become two‑faced.

Some parents are so strict that their children cannot express themselves honestly. Instead, they pretend in front of their parents and then behave completely differently once they are out of sight. I know a pastor’s son whose father is a very strict man and genuinely tries to be decent. Yet here in the West, the son is known for heavy drug use. But whenever he visits Nigeria, he packages himself to fit his father’s expectations perfectly.

I grew up in a household where my dad was extremely strict. He would not tolerate anything outside the rules he set. My mom, on the other hand, was also strict, but she was reasonable. She allowed us to explain our thought process and the reasoning behind our actions. After listening carefully, she would help us understand what we did wrong and remind us of the consequences. She would then report everything to my dad when he returned home. Because of my dad’s strictness, he often jumped to conclusions and punished us even when we were not at fault.

In that kind of environment, there were really only two possible outcomes: either give him what he wanted to see and then do what we wanted behind his back, or take our grievances to our mom. Fortunately, we had the latter. And there were times when we thought he was wrong, but my mom helped us see that he was right—and other times when she helped him see that we were right.

Because she was open (never acted like a friend and I have never considered her a friend) and trusting, I grew up thinking more about how my actions would disappoint her than about my father’s cane. I have never made decisions out of fear of punishment. Instead, my mother’s trust and faith in me have always guided my choices and actions in life.

Because of this comment, I just randomly shouted at my kids "Wo, I'm not your friend o! "

Now they're confused, because they weren't misbehaving

I agree with some points. I think some of the strict parents of the past were borderline abusive (I know Pastors' kids who have said their parents were awful because that kind of position on society tends to attract megalomaniacs).

But I also feel my generation has gotten it wrong, in that we are trying to make up for the strictness of the previous generation and have gone too far in the opposite direction and are lax parents. We're too busy trying to "protect and love" our little darlings, that we've spoilt them.

Ĵ

Stephen0mozzy:
I was watching a video on YouTube by one wise Nigerian, and he maid one quote



Come to think of the moral decadence of the kids and young adults today, is it really far from the truth? Teens these days do not even have a sense of responsibility or consequence - they have zero respect for authority.

Whe we were growing up, it was not like this with us, there used to be a saying then that "na one person dey born pikin, but na the whole community dey train am" - but these days, you can't even correct a child before their parents rain on you like hawks.

Where did we get it wrong? What can we do to remedy the situation, or atleast the nezt generation?

Share your thoughts.

Are these not pressing issues?

Yes, the society has lost its salt on discipline, priorities have shifted and our morals have gone to the wind. I came across a video on social media. Girls of less than 15 years, who should be well covered and decent, were seen twerking during an inter-house sports. Not only that, an innocent man was their victim because they harassed him with their seductive dance.


We truly have lost it as a country. I'm grateful to God for my experience in teaching. This would come in handy when I have my kids. We may raise them in isolation and home-school them until we have imbued in them core values. Isolation has its own downside, but I would rather deal with that than initiation.

Jakarta:
I was at a family meeting last week, my aunt's ex was threatening his son, that he will break his leg or his arm whenever he visits the village.

That the boy is not giving him money, he is not using him as an agent either in yahoo or when he bought a land recently. Can you believe this boy is just 17 years old, and dropped out of secondary school 2 years ago. How I wish family allow me that day, I be wan give the man serious beating.

You should not be surprised. Fraud is the order of the day. Everyone seems to be involved in it.

brain54:
I look at parenting and what it has become nowadays...

And worst- where it is headed, It's like a void.

It's sad but most parents need parenting themselves!

Nobody is talking about this. If this trend tarries, it means we are done for and so is the next generation.

Onegai:
Because of this comment, I just randomly shouted at my kids "Wo, I'm not your friend o! "

Now they're confused, because they weren't misbehaving

I agree with some points. I think some of the strict parents of the past were borderline abusive (I know Pastors' kids who have said their parents were awful because that kind of position on society tends to attract megalomaniacs).

But I also feel my generation has gotten it wrong, in that we are trying to make up for the strictness of the previous generation and have gone too far in the opposite direction and are lax parents. We're too busy trying to "protect and love" our little darlings, that we've spoilt them.

You are right! Parents of this generation have chosen extremely leftist parental-style in raising their kids, in contrast to the conversative style of our parents. Out here, parents of my generation are acting as bestie to their kids. That is a disaster in the making. I am worried about the future of these kids.

Michael Hopf sums up this cycles and the implication better "Hard times create strong men. Strong men create good times. Good times create weak men. And, weak men create hard times"