₦airaland Forum

First of all, a moment of silence, in honour of our heroes, who had to go be with our Ancestors, so that they may watch over us from the heavens.

Sometimes, I just think back, and I smile. You know, when you look back at the odds you beat to become the man you are today, without any support, you'll just hit your chest and say... "Na man I be!" Hehe.

There are many people today who are struggling, because maybe for one reason or the other, they lost their father, and it may seem as though the future is without hope, especially when there is no wealth or inheritance to fall back on; but understand this, you're not alone. There are many people who have gone through life, literally from burnt grass to grace. But it was not easy, but they turned out fine.

So you'll be fine. You just have to be a man, take the loss without breaking down, and look forward to the future.

So men in the house.... How did you live through life without family wealth, without the presence of a father to teach you the things only a man can teach his son and turn OUT JUST FINE AS A RESPONSIBLE ADULT making your impact in the world. You just might inspire someone to keep building and pushing.

And what advise will you give to fathers today, that you wish your father put in place?

The ones I know got set back for a year or two. From there, life adjusted. It didn’t take long before they returned to the standard they were used to sans a father. They’re okay today with children of their own.

Life is for the living. Who don go don go. You will be remembered once in a while. Your memory will not hold anybody back nor stop life from continuing.

Some advise I'll give men today who have children.... and which I'll put in place when my kids start coming too.

1. You see that public father christmas that you're doing, that you'll leave your wife and children at home, but would be spending your money to make friends, colleague, extended family happy, while your kids struggle? ALL OF THEM WILL ABANDON YOUR KIDS if anything happens to you tomorrow. It's okay to be generous, BUT MAKE SURE YOUR WIFE AND CHILDREN enjoy the best of life and you secure their future before you start investing in getting accolades outside.

At your funeral, many of them will promise heaven and earth, but 4 months after... all of them go vanish.

2. Set up a Trust for your kids - I don't know if there's anything like a Trust in Nigeria sha, but open a fixed deposit account for all your kids, and occasionally put money there when you have spare change. Over time it will compound, and they can access it after they are 18 years (on certain conditions sha, you don't want your kids to be wayward just because money dey they can fall back to).

3. When they say marry better woman, y'all will think wife is for paparrazi. Hehe... Pray you live long sha o. If you marry a woman who doesn't know how to work, no skills, no sense of survival, your kids will bear the brunt of it (God bless my mother sha, na woman she be!) - some of them will likely be sent out to live as servants where they'll likely be maltreated.

4. Take care of yourself! Take care of yourself! Go for check up... stay healthy, stay strong and stay alive for your family.

By being a moe-run. Hurtss.

CodeTemplar:
By being a moe-run. Hurtss.

Haba... shey you dey whine me ni 😅

By grace of God 🙏💪

I think its better for a son to lose his father than no knowing your father.

how about those who had a father but no fatherly love more like cat and rat. that is worse than losing a father

Pootle:
how about those who had a father but no fatherly love more like cat and rat. that is worse than losing a father

Hmmm.... well, it doesn't make sense to start comparing which pain is worst, I think that's just as bad.

...but most times, inspite of the absence of love from such father, MANY of them still do the bare minimum at least, such as providing even if just shelter, for the family.

And for someone who said goodbye to his at 7yrs old, I think I'd have rather have him around than not.

Stephen0mozzy:
Hmmm.... well, it doesn't make sense to start comparing which pain is worst, I think that's just as bad.

...but most times, inspite of the absence of love from such father, MANY of them still do the bare minimum at least, such as providing even if just shelter, for the family.

And for someone who said goodbye to his at 7yrs old, I think I'd have rather have him around than not.

you wont understand, so lock up

God is helping us.
My father was assassinated when I was 1½ year. He was a bike rider then. His assailant took the bike after the deed was done. Hmmmm
God made way for me, I struggled at first but merciful extended family members, hustle, friends and others.

Although, I do things I'm ain't proud of while growing up because I lacked a father figure but when Jesus Christ came into the picture. It became bliss and I took his yoke and burden which were light and easy... So many times, I was depressed, I cried but there's no one to be blamed. The dead cannot be blamed because all things worked together for good.

Last year, I graduated with a First class in the university and currently in a national service.
God be praised 🙏🙏. He's still doing wonders in my life and I believe He'll continue unto His Glory.

Pootle:
you wont understand, so lock up

Like I said, we're not here to measure pain.
Take care. ✌🏾

Imma624:
God is helping us.
My father was assassinated when I was 1½ year. He was a bike rider then. His assailant took the bike after the deed was done. Hmmmm
God made way for me, I struggled at first but merciful extended family members, hustle, friends and others.

Although, I do things I'm ain't proud of while growing up because I lacked a father figure but when Jesus Christ came into the picture. It became bliss and I took his yoke and burden which were light and easy... So many times, I was depressed, I cried but there's no one to be blamed. The dead cannot be blamed because all things worked together for good.

Last year, I graduated with a First class in the university and currently in a national service.
God be praised 🙏🙏. He's still doing wonders in my life and I believe He'll continue unto His Glory.

May God rest his soul.

Congratulations on your graduation from school my good Sir. May more doors of favour open to you.

He'll be proud of you if he was still around.