₦airaland Forum

To avoid story that touch or to save you a lifetime of future headache and heartbreak. Please study the person first before you marry. Study them like person dey study for JAMB, ask questions so you will know or will not be surprise, knowledge is power.

See how they react to you when he or she is angry with you. Do they go incognito for days or weeks after an argument? Imagine a boyfriend or girlfriend who is not generous to your family or to you but is very generous to his or her family but you come marry person and expect them to change. You are in for the biggest surprise.

Do not assume that when she or he is married to you , he or she will change and improve. That is the biggest lie, you will just see their true color.
If your fiancé is stingy to you before marriage, your fiancé will be stingy to you during marriage
if your fiance do not like your siblings or family before marriage, you fiancé will not change.

This marriage of a thing is becoming more dangerous than bandit. You hardly see marriage that last 20 years without real fight. I wonder who brought or imposed this institution on humanity. Some said it's from God that human form from there mindset. Marriage has caused more harm to human than anything else. It's a crazy world 🌎

If you’re to do this then forget about it, you’re never getting married, just don’t get the one that’ll send you straight to grave

Cum4me:
This marriage of a thing is becoming more dangerous than bandit. You hardly see marriage that last 20 years without real fight. I wonder who brought or imposed this institution on humanity. Some said it's from God that human form from there mindset. Marriage has caused more harm to human than anything else. It's a crazy world 🌎

Lies. It's the government. It's just another tool for control. God wants continuation of humanity through birthing but not by organized marriage like the ones the government regulates. True marriage is traditional and has nothing to do with the State

Half advise. What do you know about yourself before knowing others?

Nawa oo, l honestly wonder why you people are so scared of that life-saver called "divorce" l mean like, if the so-called marriage is not working out, then everybody should just go their separate ways na. If you're afraid of what people will say, then you're the biggest fool on this planet earth cus people must talk. And those that matter don't even care, while those that care don't even matter. Or you keep managing and dieing in silence for kids that will still abandon you and face their own lives in the near future. I just tire for the black man's mentality l swear. Cus me sef, l don't even want kids to start with, or at most just one. So there won't be any much commitments holding me back if l wanna move, cus l will surely move fast and furiously if she starts misbehaving! Cus my own vex dey completely scatter my brain and e dey last for months or even years sef. That's why l don't tolerate nonsense!!!

Following...
Thinking about it.

And above all...
MAKE SURE YOU ONLY ACCEPT THE FLAWS THAT YOU CAN TOLERATE EVEN WHEN YOU'RE ANGRY.

It's easy to get all excited about the I'M GETTING MARRIED SOON.

Right from the dating stage, start to set the ground rules about the rubbish that you will NEVER TOLERATE. Also don't try to TRICK the person into marrying you by BUYING THEM HEAVEN AND EARTH and expecting them to have common sense of prioritizing the family needs over their own.

I don dey erase the thought of marriage from my skull small small cuz since the day I started having this conversation with my banny,e come be like say I wan crase

Ibrahim1985:
To avoid story that touch or to save you a lifetime of future headache and heartbreak. Please study the person first before you marry. Study them like person dey study for JAMB, ask questions so you will know or will not be surprise, knowledge is power.

See how they react to you when he or she is angry with you. Do they go incognito for days or weeks after an argument? Imagine a boyfriend or girlfriend who is not generous to your family or to you but is very generous to his or her family but you come marry person and expect them to change. You are in for the biggest surprise.

Do not assume that when she or he is married to you , he or she will change and improve. That is the biggest lie, you will just see their true color.
If your fiancé is stingy to you before marriage, your fiancé will be stingy to you during marriage
if your fiance do not like your siblings or family before marriage, you fiancé will not change.

And to add to this , always know whom your fiance follows on social media or whom they likes his or her posts.

What a nonsense write up, I hope u are married before commenting about marriage. Why should I b generous to my girlfriend's family and y should I measure the man's generosity to his family. His family? Guy check ur head. There is no straight manual to marriage. If u like go Cambridge go read marriage. People change everyday even u and ur hubby.

Ibrahim1985:
To avoid story that touch or to save you a lifetime of future headache and heartbreak. Please study the person first before you marry. Study them like person dey study for JAMB, ask questions so you will know or will not be surprise, knowledge is power.

See how they react to you when he or she is angry with you. Do they go incognito for days or weeks after an argument? Imagine a boyfriend or girlfriend who is not generous to your family or to you but is very generous to his or her family but you come marry person and expect them to change. You are in for the biggest surprise.

Do not assume that when she or he is married to you , he or she will change and improve. That is the biggest lie, you will just see their true color.
If your fiancé is stingy to you before marriage, your fiancé will be stingy to you during marriage
if your fiance do not like your siblings or family before marriage, you fiancé will not change.

Yes, study the intended spouse like Add-Maths but no matter how hard or deep you study, you'll never get to understand him/her. Things unfold with time. Most women turn to real de-mons after child birth. My advise is, marry the person whose excesses you're prepared to tolerate. Marriage is an impossible but necessary institution.

Cum4me:
This marriage of a thing is becoming more dangerous than bandit. You hardly see marriage that last 20 years without real fight. I wonder who brought or imposed this institution on humanity. Some said it's from God that human form from there mindset. Marriage has caused more harm to human than anything else. It's a crazy world 🌎

I don't agree marriage is from God. Otherwise majority other species will stay with one partner for life. Mate and have children with just one partner. I know there are animals that stay with one partner all their lives. But what I'm saying is.

Human created family, religion, institutions, villages, towns and cities. We discovered fire and iron melting.

Marriage makes training children easier. You can see from the way single parents children sometimes turn out, kinda different when both parents are together. (Not saying all children both parents train turn out perfect.

We created government, we created schools, just like we created marriages.

Jesus and Apostle Paul both said if it's left to them they'll tell others not to marry but because they know human like to mate for fun so they'll encourage a partner.

kiddaz:
Lies. It's the government. It's just another tool for control. God wants continuation of humanity through birthing but not by organized marriage like the ones the government regulates. True marriage is traditional and has nothing to do with the State

Marriage was created long before we created religion or government.

Marriage was man invention, not government or anything like that. If you have seen the movie 10,000 BC you'll discover that those people never had a government but they knew some things, they knew family, fire, religion and village or to live really close to each other inside and to build houses. Human are very powerful specie that always know what they want or need to continue dominating.

helinues:
Half advise. What do you know about yourself before knowing others?

I de always gbadun your take. Many of these guys think life has a manual.

Sonnobax15:

I don dey erase the thought of marriage from my skull small small cuz since the day I started having this conversation with my banny,e come be like say I wan crase

erase, it's ur choice. Hope u don't regret

Where I think people fail in marriages is wanting a good girl in a baddie. I mean a little bit of both won't be bad and true, true some woman are created like that but then a woman can be stubborn and good that's still a baddie. But if a woman is promiscuous and beautiful, she's a disaster.

People look for women they have to compete with other men for the love. A get where man go see life reach na him by himself go go village for find one girl wey dem never spoil, give am everything, show her from your experience and keep her in a box. But you carry that village girl and started getting carried away exposing her to life you run away from with that baddie. You'll go back to zero.

Good women dey everywhere but most of the time they don't come beautiful, elegant, sophisticated and what have you. And I'm not saying because a woman is not exposed, dirty and what have you that she's not already bad. You as a man must be able to look and pay attention. I can always tell because I've been with plenty of women. Me I know say difference dey. But if you look at a watch that's worth a thousand naira and someone offer it to you at a hundred naira. You should know something is wrong. Na so I de see women matter.

I've dated a particular girl for 9 years trying to figure her out. Na me waka commot when frustration wan kill me, the one I married we dated like 3 months and after two kids. I don't have any regret. I'm telling you my mom once asked my wife where and how we met because she's unlike any woman she's seen me with. So trust me they are always different. Na Una de find woman wey Sabi dress, speak good English, looks classy and elegant all for yourself. Life don't work that way and sometimes it does. Because there's no manual to life.

alanto:
Marriage was created long before we created religion or government.

Marriage was man invention, not government or anything like that. If you have seen the movie 10,000 BC you'll discover that those people never had a government but they knew somethings, they knew family, fire, religion and village or to live really close to each other inside and to build houses. Human are very powerful specie that always know what they want or need to continue dominating.

Lol who is man and who is the government Oh maybe we are governed by aliens and not human's like us
You were so quick to mention me and couldn't even read through the few sentences I wrote. Read the last line of what you previously quoted

Of course, one should be observant of red flags and if the person doesn't change, walk away. It's just like the thread on fp where the op said she noticed the bad breath before marriage but overlooked it. They've been married for Idk how long now and the bad breath is still there, not to mention he also has BO, on top stinginess and other issues. Let her carry her cross.

kiddaz:
Lol who is man and who is the government Oh maybe we are governed by aliens and not human's like us
You were so quick to mention me and couldn't even read through the few sentences I wrote. Read the last line of what you previously quoted

Bros there's man and there's government. You said government created marriage to keep us under and I'm telling you that man discovered marriage before we discover government. Relax bro. We are enlightening ourselves not arguing or fighting.

Cum4me:
This marriage of a thing is becoming more dangerous than bandit. You hardly see marriage that last 20 years without real fight. I wonder who brought or imposed this institution on humanity. Some said it's from God that human form from there mindset. Marriage has caused more harm to human than anything else. It's a crazy world 🌎

🙄 are u saying bandit is less dangerous than marriage.... 🙄🙄

What of a girl saying if her husband cheats on her, she would cheat back?

I’m sure some guys have heard some girls say this…

Of course it sounds cringy, and when you react they will gaslight you saying are you planing to cheat?

Now a girl with that mindset is a big red flag… in fact red canopy…
It’s not about a man planning to cheat but it shows a woman who is vengeful and ashaswoo don dey her eyes… trust me, that woman is poor in conflict resolution and cannot value her body… she is a time bomb

And I don’t know how you as a man would carry your legs go still kneel down to girl whey don dey show signs of toxicity…
Na man you be! Man get advantage to choose… woman no fit propose to herself, she no fit propose to man… so allowing a woman to dictate on what terms and you still go give am the trophy ring… ring whey plenty girls dey find

Marriage is still like gambling to me.

Cum4me:
This marriage of a thing is becoming more dangerous than bandit. You hardly see marriage that last 20 years without real fight. I wonder who brought or imposed this institution on humanity. Some said it's from God that human form from there mindset. Marriage has caused more harm to human than anything else. It's a crazy world 🌎

Patience ..very good patience is the watchword for marriage....When you now join patience with prayer ..then it become more easier..

alanto:
Where I think people fail in marriages is wanting a good girl in a baddie. I mean a little bit of both won't be bad and true, true some woman are created like that but then a woman can be stubborn and good that's still a baddie. But if a woman is promiscuous and beautiful, she's a disaster.

People look for women they have to compete with other men for the love. A get where man go see life reach na him by himself go go village for find one girl wey dem never spoil, give am everything, show her from your experience and keep her in a box. But you carry that village girl and started getting carried away exposing her to life you run away from with that baddie. You'll go back to zero.

Good women dey everywhere but most of the time they don't come beautiful, elegant, sophisticated and what have you. And I'm not saying because a woman is not exposed, dirty and what have you that she's not already bad. You as a man must be able to look and pay attention. I can always tell because I've been with plenty of women. Me I know say difference dey. But if you look at a watch that's worth a thousand naira and someone offer it to you at a hundred naira. You should know something is wrong. Na so I de see women matter.

I've dated a particular girl for 9 years trying to figure her out. Na me waka commot when frustration wan kill me, the one I married we dated like 3 months and after two kids. I don't have any regret. I'm telling you my mom once asked my wife where and how we met because she's unlike any woman she's seen me with. So trust me they are always different. Na Una de find woman wey Sabi dress, speak good English, looks classy and elegant all for yourself. Life don't work that way and sometimes it does. Because there's no manual to life.

Many good women nowadays comes in dirty rapping paper, just overlook the rap, if u open it is a superb present. Just dat most men wants them is good rapper if you open u will find snake. I hope u understand my analogy

Who get the time sef?

Just don't marry, simple...

Ibrahim1985:
To avoid story that touch or to save you a lifetime of future headache and heartbreak. Please study the person first before you marry. Study them like person dey study for JAMB, ask questions so you will know or will not be surprise, knowledge is power.

See how they react to you when he or she is angry with you. Do they go incognito for days or weeks after an argument? Imagine a boyfriend or girlfriend who is not generous to your family or to you but is very generous to his or her family but you come marry person and expect them to change. You are in for the biggest surprise.

Do not assume that when she or he is married to you , he or she will change and improve. That is the biggest lie, you will just see their true color.
If your fiancé is stingy to you before marriage, your fiancé will be stingy to you during marriage
if your fiance do not like your siblings or family before marriage, you fiancé will not change.

If you like study them like A level....Marriage is a different ball game compared to dating, courtship etc

Marriage is just like bet9ja.
You have to choose your right poison.

Too much advice yet marriages are crashing on a daily basis. Do what works for you cause everybody has what works for them

if there had been no marriage right from the start of creation, before the discovery of modern technologies, and creation of baby mamas won't human race have been wiped off the earth surface ? marriage will continue till eternity even if tech discover procreation without extracting anything from both gender body marriage will still go on even if many will fail

Cum4me:
This marriage of a thing is becoming more dangerous than bandit. You hardly see marriage that last 20 years without real fight. I wonder who brought or imposed this institution on humanity. Some said it's from God that human form from there mindset. Marriage has caused more harm to human than anything else. It's a crazy world 🌎

If you like, spend 10 years with a woman before you marry her, it will surprise you that YOU WILL NEVER KNOW A LARGER PERCENT OF HER PERSONALITY until you both start sleeping in the same room.

Cum4me:
This marriage of a thing is becoming more dangerous than bandit. You hardly see marriage that last 20 years without real fight. I wonder who brought or imposed this institution on humanity. Some said it's from God that human form from there mindset. Marriage has caused more harm to human than anything else. It's a crazy world 🌎

You lied!
What is marriage?

Is it just two grown ups living together and still live each persons selfish life? Or just contracting each other without purpose?
Or just for sex or things nor related to the essense of marriage?

Ignorance is killing this generation sha .... they know nothing, not even politics, Business or principles of Work etc. They just want anything that brings money and spend it!!

Marriage is give and take

Its kike any other relationship but with different purpose

many people never relate with people but want to marry ...... that foul!

Many live their and dont care how it affect others, cover up things for selfish reason ..... and still want to do same in Marriage

Marriage is a decision having its own rule ...... but many dont want to follow the rule and still call it marraige, na lie!

Many are not matured for marriage, many play marriage as if is just sex excercise, some think marriage is only good when it meets their selfish interest even if it negates the good of the other party, thinks say infatuation is enough for marriage, many come into marriage and want to enjoy it without bringing anything to the table, many are mere boyfriend/girlfriend without commitment, while others rush into it without following the proper process ....... they will all fail

MARRIAGE has PURPOSE, PROCESS, PROPERTIES, PRIORITIES AND PRINCIPLES ..... it is not 'anything goes'!!