₦airaland Forum

Chijeep:
To cut the long story short, I did my traditional marriage 3momths ago, though I met the girl online but before we even started talking about marriage, our chat always flow with fun and togetherness.

But the moment we return back to our base after the marriage this girl started behaving like introvert and a bit celibacy. Won't want to talk to me like in the aspect of gisting and barely share issues and decisions with me. Even the aspect of food she hardly find interest in eating what I'm able to provide.
I've confronted her more than 3 times and reminded her that I told you already before we go into this union that I'm not rich yet and I'm managing, and she assured me that she's also not from a rich home either and she'll be supportive. but now the girl will be acting as if I'm forcing her to eat the rubbish I provided.

I told her that she's free to quit the marriage if she's not that impressed and happy but she doesn't want to or maybe she's thinking of how people will see her.

PLEASE WHAT CAN I DO AS THIS IS AFFECTING MY EMOTIONS?, BECAUSE I'M A GUY THAT DECIDED TO LIVE AND DO MY THINGS ALONE, SO THAT I'LL BE ABLE TO HAVE MORE TIME WITH MY WIFE AND CHILDREN WHEN THE TIME COMES.

She is waiting for a better opportunity to leave. She will leave eventually.

Sonnobax15:

Na 3 months old marriage don dey experience traffic like this so

Bro,it seems you guys rushed into the marriage too early. The time you guys were supposed to use for dating and courting,una rush convert am into marriage.

Funny enough how you fell for the idea of her managing with you . Just pray that Tinubu shouldn't win his reelection . If not,na then the real Hulk Hogan spirit go take unleash for your wife body come out

😂😂😂😂

chidifrank:
Read and try your best to understand and if it’s not entering your head, let someone else read and think and understand for you . The Guy already said he told the lady during dating that he is not rich only managing so why do you say the guy was showing the girl rich man vibes ? Where u there? All this " i want to talk , I want to prove I am smart enough people " ; RUBBISHHHHHH

ok I didn’t see that part. What’s the rubbish for🤷‍♂️. Make sure you go to church anyways

It might be your own problem not the lady, in what you wrote here i didn't see where the lady faulted you.
First clear your mind don't assume things, so far you are doing your own part, if she doesn't want to eat what you eat let that not worry you she is not a child.
Remove that mindset not having money that is why she is behaving that way. Marriage is fantasy, maybe she is adjusting.
I know it can be frustrating that's where communication comes it, you guys should always fine way to express what you don't like.

But for now give her space and time because if you continue like this she will get irritated more.

Your focus providing and securing the future of your family ok.
Unless she comes to you and tell you in front of her family members that she is not interested on the marriage then let her be.
But for not this is just a minor issues, I know you care about her that's why it's bothering you.
But you are a family man now you should learn to see those things as part of marriage. Marriage no easy

Chijeep:
To cut the long story short, I did my traditional marriage 3momths ago, though I met the girl online but before we even started talking about marriage, our chat always flow with fun and togetherness.

But the moment we return back to our base after the marriage this girl started behaving like introvert and a bit celibacy. Won't want to talk to me like in the aspect of gisting and barely share issues and decisions with me. Even the aspect of food she hardly find interest in eating what I'm able to provide.
I've confronted her more than 3 times and reminded her that I told you already before we go into this union that I'm not rich yet and I'm managing, and she assured me that she's also not from a rich home either and she'll be supportive. but now the girl will be acting as if I'm forcing her to eat the rubbish I provided.

I told her that she's free to quit the marriage if she's not that impressed and happy but she doesn't want to or maybe she's thinking of how people will see her.

PLEASE WHAT CAN I DO AS THIS IS AFFECTING MY EMOTIONS?, BECAUSE I'M A GUY THAT DECIDED TO LIVE AND DO MY THINGS ALONE, SO THAT I'LL BE ABLE TO HAVE MORE TIME WITH MY WIFE AND CHILDREN WHEN THE TIME COMES.

If you’re capable, try and me knacking her twice a day and make sure she enjoys it. Good Sex really change a woman’s behavior

Chijeep:
To cut the long story short, I did my traditional marriage 3momths ago, though I met the girl online but before we even started talking about marriage, our chat always flow with fun and togetherness.

But the moment we return back to our base after the marriage this girl started behaving like introvert and a bit celibacy. Won't want to talk to me like in the aspect of gisting and barely share issues and decisions with me. Even the aspect of food she hardly find interest in eating what I'm able to provide.
I've confronted her more than 3 times and reminded her that I told you already before we go into this union that I'm not rich yet and I'm managing, and she assured me that she's also not from a rich home either and she'll be supportive. but now the girl will be acting as if I'm forcing her to eat the rubbish I provided.

I told her that she's free to quit the marriage if she's not that impressed and happy but she doesn't want to or maybe she's thinking of how people will see her.

PLEASE WHAT CAN I DO AS THIS IS AFFECTING MY EMOTIONS?, BECAUSE I'M A GUY THAT DECIDED TO LIVE AND DO MY THINGS ALONE, SO THAT I'LL BE ABLE TO HAVE MORE TIME WITH MY WIFE AND CHILDREN WHEN THE TIME COMES.

I have problem with your kind of men. we have said it several times before here that when a woman says she'll manage with you, dude it's a trap for her to lure you Into marrying her, that was her mission! But your kinds will never learn.

She isn't ready to quit yet because she probably hasn't seen her dream man yet or a rich man yet. Once she does! Otilo. She'll stay with you and be cheating with the man until she has emotionally and completely detached from you then she'll divorced u and move on.

U better quit that thing you call marriage and make money and enjoy your single life in peace. When you see a woman that is interested in you, you'll know

Chijeep:
I'm not but I'm not just welcoming her behaviour. She's a good girl. She doesn't complain about anything but the flow isn't just there. What of when we start having kids?

Keep lamenting until she sees a Guy who's rich and tickles her fantasy. You're just a spare tyre she's managing for now until she sees someone better.

It sad you didn't learn about women's psychology before rushing to marry her. Na your type dey always insult redpill teachers online

Curious345:
Most of the time , 99% of the time , we men are the problem . Bro you only gut one life . Make her happy . Make yourself happy too. I think you're the timid guy here . But you too can improve on yourself . Seem like you build mountains out of molehills..

Arise , speak peace into your spirit

A very us3less advice.

U can never make a woman happy. Who are you to make a woman happy? A full grown adult who has failed to make herself happy, is it then you that would make her happy? God cannot make a woman happy, who then are you?

Happiness is a choice. It isn't your duty or responsibility to make any woman happy

Chijeep:
Bro, I've tried.
Atimes, I'll even be encouraging her as a graduate that even if you don't know how to spark liveliness in a marriage, you can go mak research online and bring topics so we can be discussing but all my talk just go like that

You're both not compatible. Send her back to her parents and move on with your life.

When a woman is into you, you'll know!

Bro your first mistake was. U met her online. Don't get me wrong people meet online and get married. But bro these days. Meeting girls online should be just for tatatata and not marriage. 98% of girls u meet online are not wife materials. I guess u didn't really take Ur time to study the girl u wanted to marry. Even though women pretend alot. But she will always leave traces of her original self. Only if u look closely will u see. Most girls now don't really want marriage. Dey want to escape paying their bills. They just want a big wedding to paint the town red to impress or opress their fellow ladies. That's all. They want nothing more in the union. My advice is .. talk to her. She maybe passing through a hard time emotionally. Pet her. Be patient with her. Talk to her regularly. Be friendly. She will surely come around. Wait.. do u pound her well in za oza room? This can be another big problem if u don't.. no matter how poor you are if u pound well many women will stay. And even work to provide for the family. Check that side too. I wish you good luck. Marriage is not for the weak. Be strong

avoid marriage without funds. its all about money. little or no sex. better be single next opportunity

Many things running in her mind which she didn't reveal it to you. It's you that concluded to live with her for the rest of your life, she's still contemplating, that is why she automated herself into introvert. Just be observing her, she's suffering from lack of conclusive decision to be permanent in your life.

Kobojunkie:
If you are tired of the marriage, then take the necessary step yourself.

Golden advice. Divorce her sorry ass. Face your hustle and look for one who also has something going on for herself. If you are not happy in your marriage and there is no working around it, just quit since there is still no kid

Sonnobax15:

Na 3 months old marriage don dey experience traffic like this so

Bro,it seems you guys rushed into the marriage too early. The time you guys were supposed to use for dating and courting,una rush convert am into marriage.

Funny enough how you fell for the idea of her managing with you . Just pray that Tinubu shouldn't win his reelection . If not,na then the real Hulk Hogan spirit go take unleash for your wife body come out

I always tell people marriage and relationship are two different concept entirely, Relationship is like acting movies where everyone plays according to script while marriage is a real life situation where each individuals behaviours unveiled

EmpressTitan:
Sit her down and have a heart to heart talk with her in a responsible manner. Lay out your grievances and listen to her feedback and both of you choose to address it as a team for collective best results. No reasonable woman who sees her husband hardworking trying in this Tinubu regime would not be appreciative of her husband. BTW 3months you are here running your mouth talking about divorce...all these ochanja markit marriage sef.

You dont seem to have good manners by the way you talk to the OP. Are you married yourself?
Happily married?
Cause I doubt it.

It time you both start dating the kind dating Una suppose don do before.


Disadvantages of this kind of union if not separated is early demise of the hubby.

God is your strength sha.

chidifrank:
All this single mom and bittered female gender will always push blames to a man and will never take accountability.. if the guy is doing something wrong as you claimed even though you were not there with them and even though the guy has said he has held a peace talk 3 times with the wife so she can air her own views and table where the guy is not doing well , yet you are saying rubbish as a female gender with no thinking cap just emotional cap.. you have always had brain but no wiring inside as a female gender that you are , shut up and let men or few of the female gender that thinks right find some advise to give the Op. Pant

Mr Man , l am a responsibly married Man.
Give your advice to OP and stop attacking me, no be me do you oooooooooo
Carry your frustration to the woman wey do you wertin no good

greypencils:
Na real Mr Rubbish

Guy open im mouth waah say na rubbish he dey provide for family wey he dey build.Even if na okpa e hand reach to provide, na rubbish him go call am? Shioor!

Desusi:
How can you be contributing rubbish for your better half? Who foes that.The vail has now opened and she can see you clearly.That's why!

Maybe his wife may not have considered it rubbish but only might be asking for change in diet or something she might be used to. It might just be divergence in dietary choices as they currently are now living as one which might require just wisdom, patience and selflessness from both of them to handle and overtime they solidify as one unit seamlessly.

StoryHaven:
You dont seem to have good manners by the way you talk to the OP. Are you married yourself?
Happily married?
Cause I doubt it.

Get tf of my mention.

chidifrank:
Do you even understand all what the Op has been writing out or you have problem with the male gender already. He is trying so hard to explain things and your own personal absurdity is not letting u be... what kind of dull or shld I say bittered / one sided human being are u . If u already want to pick sides, tell the Op than trying so hard to make him feel like he is good for nothing . All this single moms sef

Must everything boil down to gender wars?

She could be adjusting to the realities of marriage (or not). Though I am of the belief that people know what they are doing and that includes her. If something is wrong, she should communicate and you would make adjustments.

Marriage without money is hard. Even harder for a couple with no prior connection and dating phase. So you are in for a rough ride, and I wish you strength. Make e no be say na me spoil your marriage.

gigabyte13:
Mr Man , l am a responsibly married Man.
Give your advice to OP and stop attacking me, no be me do you oooooooooo
Carry your frustration to the woman wey do you wertin no good

you be man come dy reason like woman . Okay now I know , u are not man enough . You will get your reward soon . Continue dy reason this way . Weakie

EmpressTitan:
Must everything boil down to gender wars?

no one is fighting a war here but you see gender based, man and woman are different. There is a reason the devil spoke with the woman and not the man . I will leave u with that

Chijeep:
I'm not but I'm not just welcoming her behaviour. She's a good girl. She doesn't complain about anything but the flow isn't just there. What of when we start having kids?

Kids should change the narrative.
She's still adjusting.

pocohantas:
She could be adjusting to the realities of marriage (or not). Though I am of the belief that people know what they are doing and that includes her. If something is wrong, she should communicate and you would make adjustments.

Marriage without money is hard. Even harder for a couple with no prior connection and dating phase. So you are in for a rough ride, and I wish you strength. Make e no be say na me spoil your marriage.

I don't even like his tone.

That one is my problem here.

folake4u:
I don't even like his tone.

That one is my problem here.

You mean OP's tone? He sounds calm to me. What don't you like about his tone?

Obviously, both of you are supposed to be fixing your lives as kids but no! You decided it is fine to go first after something that should be last in your lives. However it is best you kids visit a counselor before one of you kills the other.

pocohantas:
You mean OP's tone? He sounds calm to me. What don't you like about his tone?

The fact that he referred to what he's providing for his wife as "rubbish", and him resorting to seeking external happiness.