₦airaland Forum

Hello everyone,am new here.I want to share my story with you guys and help me make a decision on what to do.Am in my early twenties.

I Lost my dad in 2024.While working as a cleaner even though he doesn't live with us (my mom and my siblings).We are finally struggling actually.So this aunty decided that someone among us the kids should come stay with her and I decided too.

She is in her middle thirties and wealthy, she is married and blessed with a daughter.Her husband travels often.She is a business woman.She sells jewelries and owns two spas.

So to cut the long story short,her behavior towards me has not been good.She talks to me anyhow, treats me anyhow and threatens to send me away back home.Though she helped me got admission into open university which is per time so I only go when I have lectures and I am also learning a tailoring skill.But are attitude is not good.She is egoistic.This has been going on for almost two years now.So on Saturday, she wasn't around,so i decided to park my things and leave because have be holding on for a long time because of what am gaining from her.

So I left for my friend's place and she has been calling and begging me to come back and even crying on the phone.My mom and siblings are also aware.One of my siblings have even advised me to leave but I was hoping things will get better.

This aunty and have friend have been looking for me since Sunday.Even are friend have always told her to take things easy with me.This happened last year when she slapped me I almost did same if not for her friend
Please what should I do?
Should I go back there or go back home
Am a male not a female

Idowuuu:
Hello everyone,am new here.I want to share my story with you guys and help me make a decision on what to do.Am in my early twenties.
I Lost my dad in 2024.While working as a cleaner even though he doesn't live with us (my mom and my siblings).We are finally struggling actually.So this aunty decided that someone among us the kids should come stay with her and I decided too.
She is in her middle thirties and wealthy, she is married and blessed with a daughter.Her husband travels often.She is a business woman.She sells jewelries and owns two spas.
So to cut the long story short,her behavior towards me has not been good.She talks to me anyhow, treats me anyhow and threatens to send me away back home.Though she helped me got admission into open university which is per time so I only go when I have lectures and I am also learning a tailoring skill.But are attitude is not good.She is egoistic.This has been going on for almost two years now.So on Saturday, she wasn't around,so i decided to park my things and leave because have be holding on for a long time because of what am gaining from her.
So I left for my friend's place and she has been calling and begging me to come back and even crying on the phone.My mom and siblings are also aware.One of my siblings have even advised me to leave but I was hoping things will get better.
This aunty and are friend have been looking for me since Sunday.Even are friend have always told her to take things easy with me.This happened last year when she slapped me I almost did same if not for her friend
Please what should I do?
Should I go back there or go back home

Stay with your boyfriend and b saying you are at a friend's place. Okay

There are things i cant endure oh , which is suffering and smiling. I go don beat her to stupor after that slap then pack my things and leave. Never let anyone intimidate you that right there will always be your turning point.

Idowuuu:
Hello everyone,am new here.I want to share my story with you guys and help me make a decision on what to do.Am in my early twenties.
I Lost my dad in 2024.While working as a cleaner even though he doesn't live with us (my mom and my siblings).We are finally struggling actually.So this aunty decided that someone among us the kids should come stay with her and I decided too.
She is in her middle thirties and wealthy, she is married and blessed with a daughter.Her husband travels often.She is a business woman.She sells jewelries and owns two spas.
So to cut the long story short,her behavior towards me has not been good.She talks to me anyhow, treats me anyhow and threatens to send me away back home.Though she helped me got admission into open university which is per time so I only go when I have lectures and I am also learning a tailoring skill.But are attitude is not good.She is egoistic.This has been going on for almost two years now.So on Saturday, she wasn't around,so i decided to park my things and leave because have be holding on for a long time because of what am gaining from her.
So I left for my friend's place and she has been calling and begging me to come back and even crying on the phone.My mom and siblings are also aware.One of my siblings have even advised me to leave but I was hoping things will get better.
This aunty and are friend have been looking for me since Sunday.Even are friend have always told her to take things easy with me.This happened last year when she slapped me I almost did same if not for her friend
Please what should I do?
Should I go back there or go back home

Na adult u be, do as it seemeth right to you!

amancalledgodd:
Stay with your boyfriend and b saying you are at a friend's place. Okay

am a guy not a lady

You don't know your place at all.. Someone housed you, enrolled you in school, feeds you but you're mad because she's doesn't respect you? You're even claiming you would slap her in return..you left the house so your parent would be blaming her for chasing you from home.

Call your mum and tell her you left on your own. Then go and face that struggling life you desire on your own and see if you won't come running back after 2 months.

laivwire:
You don't know your place at all.. Someone housed you, enrolled you in school, feeds you buy you're mad because she's doesn't respect you? You're even claiming you would slap her in return..you left the house so your parent would be blaming her for sending you from home.

Call your mum and tell her you left on your own. Then go and gave that struggling life you desire on your own and see if you won't come running back after 2 months.

You won't understand sir
Though ,she has even called me today begging me to come around
Have been good and polite to her but am fed up

laivwire:
You don't know your place at all.. Someone housed you, enrolled you in school, feeds you buy you're mad because she's doesn't respect you? You're even claiming you would slap her in return..you left the house so your parent would be blaming her for sending you from home.

Call your mum and tell her you left on your own. Then go and gave that struggling life you desire on your own and see if you won't come running back after 2 months.

The truth and the same time sad, poverty is a wicked thing to ever happen to a man.
It kills your self-esteem and wrecks your ability to some extent.
However, OP, I reckon you're an adult, take the decision you believe suits you

Idowuuu:
You won't understand sir
Though ,she has even called me today begging me to come around
Have been good and polite to her but am fed up

Look, I've lived with a rich aunt before. I had a fully rented flat in another city, had a car and other conveniences but I lost my job at that time and things got pretty tough.

I had to move to her place in Abuja back then as I figured I could get better opportunities there. I didn't get good treatment from who I thought would be family.

I got moved to the gateman's room with a toilet outside the room in a compound with over 15 dogs that didn't recognise me.

I couldn't pee in the night if I was pressed. I leave the house in the morning hungry, fend for myself in town and rush home in the evening before they release the dogs. Sometimes I slept on an empty stomach at night.

She worked in a big corporation and had businesses bit never for one day did she say "bring Cv".

Instead, every day felt like a new hell. She even asked me to wake up early in the morning, pack the dog feaces and water all the flowers before I go to work. Me wey never even sleep complete the night before. I come home to meet big parties in the house and I would be summoned to clean up before sleeping.

Did I complain? Absolutely not. I got the first job, lost it after a few weeks, got a second job and then got a third an better job out of state and that's how I moved.

If I was impatient, I perhaps won't be in the position I am today. Think about that

Asides the physical assaults(which i strongly condemn) ,I'll advice you to go back ,try to put up with her because of your School and Training.

Focus...especially that tailoring .
Find other skills you can learn too.
Just set a target of two/years for yourself.

Nothing dey outside.
That your friend will get tired of accommodating you then what next?you go back as a burden to your mum and siblings without any gain?

I wish you well.

If you had asked for advice before moving out, I'd ask you to consider if you now earn enough to pay your own rent, feed yourself and pay your education fees and other expenses.

If you can, then no point going back.

But going back now will be like eating your own vomit.

Just focus on building your skill well and have excellent customer service in your tailoring so that you can get regular jobs and be recommended to others.

Be conscious of the fact that you will run out of favour with the person housing you now if you become a LIABILITY.

So you need to put your finances in order and get your own place or sit down and negotiate the terms of your stay in your friend's place.

If you choose not to go back, send a polite text explaining the reason for your action then block her line so that you can focus on your life.

Don't think her begging you to come bag means you are indispensable.

Be wise

No pain, no gain.

You must sacrifice some things for the greater good.

Focus on your objectives, which are school and the skills you’re learning.

Those are the most important.

Soon everything will be a story to tell.

laivwire:
You don't know your place at all.. Someone housed you, enrolled you in school, feeds you but you're mad because she's doesn't respect you? You're even claiming you would slap her in return..you left the house so your parent would be blaming her for chasing you from home.

Call your mum and tell her you left on your own. Then go and face that struggling life you desire on your own and see if you won't come running back after 2 months.

What rubbish are you saying? Who can live with a toxic person? This are the reasons why this kind of people are murdered

OssanaQuest:
If you had asked for advice before moving out, I'd ask you to consider if you now earn enough to pay your own rent, feed yourself and pay your education fees and other expenses.

If you can, then no point going back.

But going back now will be like eating your own vomit.

Just focus on building your skill well and have excellent customer service in your tailoring so that you can get regular jobs and be recommended to others.

Be conscious of the fact that you will run out of favour with the person housing you now if you become a LIABILITY.

So you need to put your finances in order and get your own place or sit down and negotiate the terms of your stay in your friend's place.

If you choose not to go back, send a polite text explaining the reason for your action then block her line so that you can focus on your life.

Don't think her begging you to come bag means you are indispensable.

Be wise

She's only begging him because she knows God is coming to punish her. So she is begging him so that when he returns it would stop God. From the way the op sounds it looks like he did the perfect worsest leaving on her, so she knows she is in trouble. In fact her troubles have begun

Nowayback10:
There are things i cant endure oh , which is suffering and smiling. I go don beat her to stupor after that slap then pack my things and leave. Never let anyone intimidate you that right there will always be your turning point.

Dat na why she no for take you in at all. She no say you go 🔪 am

OssanaQuest:
If you had asked for advice before moving out, I'd ask you to consider if you now earn enough to pay your own rent, feed yourself and pay your education fees and other expenses.

If you can, then no point going back.

But going back now will be like eating your own vomit.

Just focus on building your skill well and have excellent customer service in your tailoring so that you can get regular jobs and be recommended to others.

Be conscious of the fact that you will run out of favour with the person housing you now if you become a LIABILITY.

So you need to put your finances in order and get your own place or sit down and negotiate the terms of your stay in your friend's place.

If you choose not to go back, send a polite text explaining the reason for your action then block her line so that you can focus on your life.

Don't think her begging you to come bag means you are indispensable.

Be wise

If she did not beg him would her house be available for him to return? No.

So, its a case of he is already in the worst place he shouldn't be because of her and every worser thing that happens to him is on top of her. So, its better he keeps moving forward until God helps him or he dies outside. The aunt won't stop being evil to him and she would still throw him out and and this time she will make sure that he has one fault which she would use to tell God that "yes oo i was bad but look at what he did, its not good either". And then God will not punish her. Meanwhile, he is in the same worse he is in right now and maybe at that there won't be any help for him.

Op. I suggest you continue ajuwaya

Dtruthspeaker:
What rubbish are you saying? Who can live with a toxic person? This are the reasons why this kind of people are murdered

I guess you're ready to cater for him or deem it preferable to live a worse life

Dtruthspeaker:
What rubbish are you saying? Who can live with a toxic person? This are the reasons why this kind of people are murdered

I guess you're ready to cater for him or deem it preferable for him to live a worse life on the streets..

laivwire:
I guess you're ready to cater for him or deem it preferable to live a worse life

That is why I give to the poor i see and that is why I agree with God that this world should 🔥. Humans are evi...

Idowuuu:
You won't understand sir
Though ,she has even called me today begging me to come around
Have been good and polite to her but am fed up

Give her a second chance since she's putting you through school and handwork but make it clear that you won't accept poor treatment anymore. If possible involve your family so that she'd know you're very serious. I wish you the best.

Bear am small even though it's not easy. Let your target be to finish your degree program and your fashion design training.

My question is,if she were to be your mom would you have left? You better go back to her before she changes her mind, at least she was able to give you what your paren couldn’t,for this alone be grateful and ignore whatever she’s did to you🥂

Just go back, for her to call you back means she'll reduce her harsh treatment on you.

Pray to God and go back.

NOTHING GOOD COMES EASY

this is a chapter in your story it will end and another chapter will begin.

Make the new chapter a pleasant one

Idowuuu:
am a guy not a lady

guy leave her and hustle your way through, if you were a lady i would have advice you go back

laivwire:
Look, I've lived with a rich aunt before. I had a fully rented flat in another city, had a car and other conveniences but I lost my job at that time and things got pretty tough.

I had to move to her place in Abuja back then as I figured I could get better opportunities there. I didn't get good treatment from who I thought would be family.

I got moved to the gateman's room with a toilet outside the room in a compound with over 15 dogs that didn't recognise me.

I couldn't pee in the night if I was pressed. I leave the house in the morning hungry, fend for myself in town and rush home in the evening before they release the dogs. Sometimes I slept on an empty stomach at night.

She worked in a big corporation and had businesses bit never for one day did she say "bring Cv".

Instead, every day felt like a new hell. She even asked me to wake up early in the morning, pack the dog feaces and water all the flowers before I go to work. Me wey never even sleep complete the night before. I come home to meet big parties in the house and I would be summoned to clean up before sleeping.

Did I complain? Absolutely not. I got the first job, lost it after a few weeks, got a second job and then got a third an better job out of state and that's how I moved.

If I was impatient, I perhaps won't be in the position I am today. Think about that

Am back since yesterday sir.She came to my friend's place by surprise,to pick me.I don't know who gave her the info even though she knew my friend
Well, she has been treating me better since yesterday
Thank you

poshestmina:
Asides the physical assaults(which i strongly condemn) ,I'll advice you to go back ,try to put up with her because of your School and Training.

Focus...especially that tailoring .
Find other skills you can learn too.
Just set a target of two/years for yourself.

Nothing dey outside.
That your friend will get tired of accommodating you then what next?you go back as a burden to your mum and siblings without any gain?

I wish you well.

Thank you.She came around to pick me at my friend's place yesterday and I was surprised

OssanaQuest:
If you had asked for advice before moving out, I'd ask you to consider if you now earn enough to pay your own rent, feed yourself and pay your education fees and other expenses.

If you can, then no point going back.

But going back now will be like eating your own vomit.

Just focus on building your skill well and have excellent customer service in your tailoring so that you can get regular jobs and be recommended to others.

Be conscious of the fact that you will run out of favour with the person housing you now if you become a LIABILITY.

So you need to put your finances in order and get your own place or sit down and negotiate the terms of your stay in your friend's place.

If you choose not to go back, send a polite text explaining the reason for your action then block her line so that you can focus on your life.

Don't think her begging you to come bag means you are indispensable.

Be wise

Thanks you boss
She came to pick me up at my friend's place yesterday and I was surprised

Borrow2222:
No pain, no gain.

You must sacrifice some things for the greater good.

Focus on your objectives, which are school and the skills you’re learning.

Those are the most important.

Soon everything will be a story to tell.

Thank you sir
Am back already

Dtruthspeaker:
She's only begging him because she knows God is coming to punish her. So she is begging him so that when he returns it would stop God. From the way the op sounds it looks like he did the perfect worsest leaving on her, so she knows she is in trouble. In fact her troubles have begun

Have always been good to her and am sure she knows and probably thats why she's want me back
Well she came to pick me up at my friend's place yesterday and I was surprised

chicfarmer:
Give her a second chance since she's putting you through school and handwork but make it clear that you won't accept poor treatment anymore. If possible involve your family so that she'd know you're very serious. I wish you the best.

Bear am small even though it's not easy. Let your target be to finish your degree program and your fashion design training.

She came to pick me up at my friend's place yesterday and I was surprised because I didn't expect it

ibroyal:
My question is,if she were to be your mom would you have left? You better go back to her before she changes her mind, at least she was able to give you what your paren couldn’t,for this alone be grateful and ignore whatever she’s did to you🥂

She came to pick me up at my friend's place yesterday and I didn't expect it

capnies:
Just go back, for her to call you back means she'll reduce her harsh treatment on you.

Pray to God and go back.

NOTHING GOOD COMES EASY

this is a chapter in your story it will end and another chapter will begin.

Make the new chapter a pleasant one

She came to my friend's place yesterday to pick me up and I didn't expect it

Idowuuu:
Am back since yesterday sir.She came to my friend's place by surprise,to pick me.I don't know who gave her the info even though she knew my friend
Well, she has been treating me better since yesterday
Thank you

Good. Stay focused.

The sufferings of the present times cannot be compared to the glory that will be revealed in you.

You are also there to gain from her, the only thing you can give her back is joy from being happy having you around. Try your best to align with her expectations. If she trains you, excel. If she favours you, show gratitude, if she puts you in charge of her business, make sure it's generating income for her. She would be happy to repay the favour.

When you grow and become strong enough to be independent, you can leave and live your life as you please. It's others that would be trying to please you at that stage so you can be happy to help them.