For Men, Do This Single Thing If Your Marriage Has Lost Its Spark - Family

For Men, Do This Single Thing If Your Marriage Has Lost Its Spark - Family - Nairaland

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For Men, Do This Single Thing If Your Marriage Has Lost Its Spark by uche87(op): 9:39am On Aug 27

Let me be blunt with you; go and make money!

When a man isn’t doing well financially, women hardly find such a man attractive. Even when they give such a man a chance, it will be an interim role. They just don’t want to keep such a man on a permanent basis. It is worse when the relationship is happening in a poverty-stricken country like Nigeria. This is a place where every move is almost about ensuring survival.

They may admire you, but they see you as a burden in the long run. The same scenario plays out in marriages. Love might bring a couple together, but money is what keeps things going smoothly. Rent, the cost of food, clothing, childcare and other bills are not cheap. Companies that provide these essential services in homes are not going to accept love from you as a means of payment. It is money.

The moment a man struggles to afford the basics or can only do the barest minimum in marriage, his wife might unconsciously start to lose respect for him. It is worse when she sees stories of men doing wonders for their partners on social media. I mean gifting their wives cars, houses, luxury bags, jewellery and all sorts of things.

Frustration starts to set in. Intolerance follows. She starts to complain about simple things that should normally be ignored. She tells you that you spend too much time on your phone, says you are boring, complains that the household chores are choking, tells you that you are adding weight, and she might even get bitter when you make time to watch football matches on weekends.

But if you are making money, you become new in her sight every day, especially when you cater to her needs adequately.

I heard a story about a man who complained that his wife was boring in bed. It was all missionary for years. She would lie down and spread her legs like a processed chicken and allow him to do the work. He complained, but she didn’t change.

One day, he was given a fat annual bonus from work. He divided the money and gave a large chunk to his wife. The wife went gaga. That night, she mounted him like a horse heading towards the battlefield in the medieval period. That money brought out the naughtiness in her. It unlocked a part of her that had been locked away from her husband.

That is the power of money. The same effect it has on a woman is what it has on a man. When a man starts to make money, his mobile phone will start ringing more. The level of respect people have for him will go through the roof. Many will make themselves available to him because something is at stake.

If a woman tells you that you are not her spec, it could possibly mean that your purchasing power is low. You have nothing tangible to offer her. If women truly had specs, then how are the sugar daddies controlling the relationship market in Nigeria? If you see some of these sugar daddies physically, you will lose respect for the women. This accounts for why these women never flaunt them.

Money is the cheat code. With due respect, I doubt if Ned Nwoko would have stood a chance with Regina Daniels if he were a gateman. That was almost a beauty-and-the-beast situation.

A veteran pastor and relationship expert, Kingsley Okonkwo, in a viral post on X, had this to say:

“I feel for the men of this generation….relationships have been so commercialized nowadays that it’s almost impossible for a young man to find true love.

When we were young all you had to get was a girls phone number, but now all they want to send is their account number. Now you are expected to pay rent, school fees and transport before you are taken seriously.”

From his post, you can infer that money is the central theme. Most values like looks, dress sense, spoken English, swagger, exposure, educational qualifications and others have become secondary needs. Money takes the primary and pole position.

A man who is doing well financially will always be new in the sight of his wife. She will purposely and painstakingly accommodate your bad sides and behavioural excesses. She will wilfully make excuses for you. Only a rich man enjoys this privilege.

If the spark is gone, work on your finances and see how fast things will change. Money isn’t everything and can’t solve all marital problems, but it would wipe away most problems. It gives you an unbelievable exemption from certain criteria you have failed to meet.

https://www.facebook.com/thevillagetowncrier/posts/pfbid0S22YkjuAoQUTkW1BjpdVvznbHENraLjUGxm5ktw5YdXuumYAyysjyURH5XnRQR4Bl

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Re: For Men, Do This Single Thing If Your Marriage Has Lost Its Spark by Gotocourt: 10:20am On Aug 27

When a man isn’t doing well financially, women hardly find such a man attractive. Even when they give such a man a chance, it will be an interim role.

Women are Users, Just do the hardwork undecided

41 Likes 1 Share

Re: For Men, Do This Single Thing If Your Marriage Has Lost Its Spark by njokuuche77(m): 10:21am On Aug 27

As a married man, I can tell you for free: OP spoke nothing but the raw truth.
Money is the oxygen of modern marriage.
Make motivational speakers no deceive you oooo!
Love doesn't pay NEPA bill, and it definitely doesn't pay school fees. When poverty enters through the door, romance jumps out through the window.
Financial stress kills a woman's mood. It is hard for a wife to be romantic when her mind is constantly in "survival mode.
When the financial burden is lifted, her mind relaxes, and that is when the spark returns.

79 Likes 1 Share

Re: For Men, Do This Single Thing If Your Marriage Has Lost Its Spark by greatiyk4u(m): 10:23am On Aug 27

Money and wealth itself is relative and all about mindset , the problem with most of you online motivational speakers is that you use Lagos, Abuja and other developed cities and countries of the world as yardstick for judging weather and riches.......many people in the rural communities without 200k savings are happily living without complaints

If you're worth 5M in gboko, Benue state, you live far better life than someone worth 50M staying in island part of Lagos.

27 Likes 1 Share

Re: For Men, Do This Single Thing If Your Marriage Has Lost Its Spark by Checkwell: 10:24am On Aug 27

Can someone just summarize this epistle?

1 Like

Re: For Men, Do This Single Thing If Your Marriage Has Lost Its Spark by Worryingly: 10:27am On Aug 27*

Una matter just tire me for this country. Everything is about money and thats why crime is on the rise.

Its a shame how increasingly commercialised relationships have become in Nigeria. Yes, money matters. Financial hardship can create enormous pressure in a marriage, but the idea that if a marriage loses its spark, the man simply needs to make more money is a shallow diagnosis of a complex problem.
Money can pay rent, provide comfort and reduce stress, but it cannot automatically buy love, intimacy, respect, trust, loyalty, communication or sexual compatibility. Yet we are increasingly creating a culture where every relationship problem is treated as a financial problem. The marriage is struggling? Make more money. There is no intimacy? Make more money. Your partner is unhappy? Throw more money at it.

It's like how the Nigerian government throws a bag of rice at every problem.

This mentality allows people to avoid the difficult work of being better partners. Nobody examines their behaviour, communication, emotional availability, selfishness or contribution to the marriage.
The truth is, financial provision and relationship competence are not the same thing. A person can be an excellent provider and a terrible spouse. There are wealthy people in miserable marriages, just as there are couples with modest means who have genuine friendship, love and peace.
I am not romanticising poverty. Love cannot pay bills, feed children or solve financial irresponsibility. Money is important. But it should be a tool for building a better life together and not a substitute for effort, emotional maturity and genuine partnership.

We need to stop teaching people that becoming rich is the cheat code to a successful marriage. Make money, absolutely. But also learn how to communicate, show affection, resolve conflict, respect your partner and build together. Otherwise, we risk creating marriages and relationships that are financially comfortable but emotionally bankrupt.

21 Likes

Re: For Men, Do This Single Thing If Your Marriage Has Lost Its Spark by Eba50: 10:28am On Aug 27*

madam i love you now, stay, but i good for the other room, stay. so make men go rob and kidnap. no wonder my friend get countless side chicks and his wife dare not complain, cos he's heavily loaded. i supervised construction of 2 duplex houses for him when he was abroad, also owns chains of filling stations. u cant tell me am not attractive cos am broke only to tell me to be loyal to only one when. heavily loaded. its cheating on yourself

5 Likes

Re: For Men, Do This Single Thing If Your Marriage Has Lost Its Spark by SirJerrie(m): 10:28am On Aug 27

Money is important.

But, person wey use money buy love no dey pay finish.

Also, if money was the element keeping the spark in a marriage, rich couples no go ever divorce.

16 Likes

Re: For Men, Do This Single Thing If Your Marriage Has Lost Its Spark by EmmyMaestro(m): 10:28am On Aug 27

Checkwell:
Can someone just summarize this epistle?

In all you d,

1. Make money

2. Make more money

3. Keep making money

2 Likes

Re: For Men, Do This Single Thing If Your Marriage Has Lost Its Spark by Kavarat: 10:29am On Aug 27

Checkwell:
Can someone just summarize this epistle?

Make money

Make money

Make money

1 Like

Re: For Men, Do This Single Thing If Your Marriage Has Lost Its Spark by jojo1415: 10:31am On Aug 27

Honey na money simple...young guys let No one deceive u....go and make money!!!

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: For Men, Do This Single Thing If Your Marriage Has Lost Its Spark by Miggs(m): 10:31am On Aug 27

Checkwell:
Can someone just summarize this epistle?

Nothing much,just the usual "Men make money inorder to acquire and keep women" pervasive,mo-ro-nic mantra propagated by incel adjacent males because in their world,women are merely things not humans (with their own thoughts and feelings) to be bought and disposed off when undesired

11 Likes 1 Share

Re: For Men, Do This Single Thing If Your Marriage Has Lost Its Spark by Bluntguy: 10:32am On Aug 27

I saw someone who built a new mansion and wrote at his gate: Money stops nonsense.

I'm done talking.

6 Likes

Re: For Men, Do This Single Thing If Your Marriage Has Lost Its Spark by Finchmgh: 10:32am On Aug 27

If marriage nor use one person show example, una nor go learn lesson

7 Likes

Re: For Men, Do This Single Thing If Your Marriage Has Lost Its Spark by kingthreat(m): 10:33am On Aug 27

Bullcrap.
Make money for yourself. Don't make money because of woman.

13 Likes

Re: For Men, Do This Single Thing If Your Marriage Has Lost Its Spark by Eba50: 10:34am On Aug 27

Bluntguy:
I saw someone who built a new mansion and wrote at his gate: Money stops nonsense.

I'm done talking.

that gee wife go dey on hot seat

1 Like

Re: For Men, Do This Single Thing If Your Marriage Has Lost Its Spark by DrAda(f): 10:37am On Aug 27

True. It's very important to have a healthy respect for money. One's quality of life goes downhill without it

2 Likes

Re: For Men, Do This Single Thing If Your Marriage Has Lost Its Spark by Boomyvig: 10:37am On Aug 27

Instead of focusing solely on trendy or innovative topics, we should also be discussing how to build companies and form joint ventures, much like many successful businesses in the West. Unfortunately, conversations in this part of the world is often revolve around sex, money, marriage, and social media.

Social media itself was adopted from the West, but many of the productive uses, such as networking, business collaboration, and innovation-focused discussions, have not received the same attention.

Too often, the focus is on entertainment rather than creating value.
I rarely see Nigerian youths starting discussions about business partnerships or collaborative ventures. Most conversations seem centered on social life, leisure, and having fun. Shior.

I hope it won’t be too late before most people realize this?

8 Likes

Re: For Men, Do This Single Thing If Your Marriage Has Lost Its Spark by naturefellow(m): 10:40am On Aug 27

Checkwell:
Can someone just summarize this epistle?

even if it's information that will save your life in future? 🤡

1 Like

Re: For Men, Do This Single Thing If Your Marriage Has Lost Its Spark by Maj196(m): 10:42am On Aug 27

Dey play, so a woman is forbidden to make her own money abi. Na people like you dey make dem misbehave all in the name of they have towtow

7 Likes

Re: For Men, Do This Single Thing If Your Marriage Has Lost Its Spark by bigdammyj: 10:43am On Aug 27

Simply put, na money dey make things work for Nigeria nowadays.

4 Likes

Re: For Men, Do This Single Thing If Your Marriage Has Lost Its Spark by Stephen0mozzy: 10:44am On Aug 27

Them say men wey nor get money na nonliving things. 🤧

Re: For Men, Do This Single Thing If Your Marriage Has Lost Its Spark by Stephen0mozzy: 10:45am On Aug 27

Maj196:
Dey play, so a woman is forbidden to make her own money abi. Na people like you dey make dem misbehave all in the name of they have towtow

Na just normal human behavior. Even your own guy nor go rate you again if you nor guide. Your own guy wey nor even dey give you towtow o 😂

1 Like

Re: For Men, Do This Single Thing If Your Marriage Has Lost Its Spark by stan4b(m): 10:45am On Aug 27

Then some men or boys will come online, disturbing my ears about how their colleagues or coursemates are not giving them attention, or how they should initiate kiss or romance on a woman that is coming to visit them.
God abeg o.

Better go and put yourself to good use and make money.

If only you as a man or guy, know how much confidence money brings, you'll start making more productive use of your time, rather than chasing women.

3 Likes

Re: For Men, Do This Single Thing If Your Marriage Has Lost Its Spark by Image123(m): 10:46am On Aug 27

Ridiculous to assume that life or marriage revolves around money. It revolves better around contentment, forgiveness, communication, understanding or submission and love.
Ask the richest men in the world like Bill Gates, Bezos and co if money was enough to save their marriage. Ask pastor Chris if it was lack of money that made their marriage to lose spark.
Our society is building on a way of life that worships and elevates money and it's failing so badly.

10 Likes 1 Share

Re: For Men, Do This Single Thing If Your Marriage Has Lost Its Spark by Goo0dHardDick: 10:46am On Aug 27

Gotocourt:
When a man isn’t doing well financially, women hardly find such a man attractive. Even when they give such a man a chance, it will be an interim role.

Women are Users, Just do the hardwork .

So on point

You have said it all

1 Like

Re: For Men, Do This Single Thing If Your Marriage Has Lost Its Spark by Goo0dHardDick: 10:50am On Aug 27

njokuuche77:
As a married man, I can tell you for free: OP spoke nothing but the raw truth.
Money is the oxygen of modern marriage.
Make motivational speakers no deceive you oooo!
Love doesn't pay NEPA bill, and it definitely doesn't pay school fees. When poverty enters through the door, romance jumps out through the window.
Financial stress kills a woman's mood. It is hard for a wife to be romantic when her mind is constantly in "survival mode.
When the financial burden is lifted, her mind relaxes, and that is when the spark returns.

This simply means the more money a man makes, the more women he should add up!

Why then are women complaining on men being polygamous or cheating?

If financial stress kills a woman's mood. What happens to her making that money to make her own mood happy? How does the man making the money for himself instantly validates her mood and makes her happy?

Is money making gender restricted? What happened to gender equality?

6 Likes

Re: For Men, Do This Single Thing If Your Marriage Has Lost Its Spark by Kingpele(m): 10:54am On Aug 27

Hahaha Hahaha I have realised that as a man ,u need to work hard to take care of yourself irrespective of whatever any one has to say

2 Likes

Re: For Men, Do This Single Thing If Your Marriage Has Lost Its Spark by Dogalmighty17: 11:00am On Aug 27

They say a man is nothing without money.

Re: For Men, Do This Single Thing If Your Marriage Has Lost Its Spark by occfx: 11:02am On Aug 27

njokuuche77:
As a married man, I can tell you for free: OP spoke nothing but the raw truth.
Money is the oxygen of modern marriage.
Make motivational speakers no deceive you oooo!
Love doesn't pay NEPA bill, and it definitely doesn't pay school fees. When poverty enters through the door, romance jumps out through the window.
Financial stress kills a woman's mood. It is hard for a wife to be romantic when her mind is constantly in "survival mode.
When the financial burden is lifted, her mind relaxes, and that is when the spark returns.

As a single guy, calculate how much you spend in a month, multiply it by 5. If you are not making twice the product, forget marriage. Don't let any woman deceive you that she can manage. They cannot manage oo.

Again marry a contented woman if not, no matter how much you have, her taste will continue to increase and finish you eventually

3 Likes

Re: For Men, Do This Single Thing If Your Marriage Has Lost Its Spark by njokuuche77(m): 11:03am On Aug 27

Goo0dHardDick:
This simply means the more money a man makes, the more women he should add up!

Why then are women complaining on men being polygamous or cheating?

If financial stress kills a woman's mood. What happens to her making that money to make her own mood happy? How does the man making the money for himself instantly validates her mood and makes her happy?

Is money making gender restricted? What happened to gender equality?

Boss, let's not mix things up. Marriage is partnership, but structure matters.
On women making money: Nobody says women shouldn't work. In fact, a hardworking wife is a blessing. But nature and society still place the primary burden of security and provision on the man. When a man provides, it removes a specific "survival anxiety" from a woman that her own money doesn't always cure. It’s about her feeling safe, not just having cash.

On polygamy/cheating: Money buys comfort, it doesn't buy a license to misbehave. If a man makes money and uses it to disrespect his vows, he shouldn't be surprised when the marriage still fails. Money fixes financial stress; it doesn't fix a broken character.

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