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My Blackberry Phone Experience - Literature (2) - Nairaland

Nairaland ForumEntertainmentLiteratureMy Blackberry Phone Experience (3710 Views)

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Re: My Blackberry Phone Experience by Chinatownm(op): 7:51pm On Aug 28, 2013
jchime: BREAKING NEWS: Igbo boy have instructed me to inform Una that you should all pay 5k each into his business account before he continue the story. His reason is that he wants to prove that he is an igbo boy. Pm me and I will send you the account details.

. signed
laureate jchime,auditor/account manager...igbo boo blackberry experience foundation.

for and unbehalf of igbo boo.
.
Lmao. Jchime, u funny no be small. But wait o, y u no put my pesonal numbers dia 4 easy contact, 4 those wey wan bring cash, lol. U know na, ibo boi tins
Re: My Blackberry Phone Experience by Nobody: 8:02pm On Aug 28, 2013
Chinatown m: .
Lmao. Jchime, u funny no be small. But wait o, y u no put my pesonal numbers dia 4 easy contact, 4 those wey wan bring cash, lol. U know na, ibo boi tins
Ibo boi...Sama us tori.Funds 4ur NGO go com later..As d sayings go"tori for ground,moni 4 ur act"
1 Like
Re: My Blackberry Phone Experience by Chinatownm(op): 11:08pm On Aug 28, 2013
Phinity318: Ibo boi...Sama us tori.Funds 4ur NGO go com later..As d sayings go"tori for ground,moni 4 ur act"
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Lol. I blv u. Laptop booting. . . . . . .
Re: My Blackberry Phone Experience by Chinatownm(op):
Lmao, some people cant stop being funny on this platform. Like one user jokinly suggested that the only way this china ibo boi is going to continue this story, if only readers start paying into his account certain amount of money.” Jchime” I de feel u bro. going forward I will quickly reshuffle my cabinet and make sure u resume as my account officer with immediate effect. For those who have eagerly waited for the continuation of the story u can now send 390 to 4476 to download the full version. Remember terms and conditions apply. For further clarifications, kindly visit our nearest customer care center or call my account officer with this number 0700 ibo boi, normal call tarrif may apply. Thank you for your understanding. We are here to serve you better. LMAO

Like seriously lets be sincere with ourselves here, time and time again I have heard people on different occasions say that igbo man too like money. The question here is, who no like money ni? Ok let’s say hausa man no like money and Dangote is the richest man in west Africa to the point say im name de Forbes list of richest men in the world. Yoruba man no like money too and adenuga is there waxing strong. Each time I load my glo line he smiles to the bank singing MAGA DON PAY SHOUT ALLELUYA. Remember God is watching us all on 3D. For those who still mentain that erronous coinage of igbo man too like money, i gat one question for y'all. Name the three wise men from the east who first visited the child Jesus and subsequently paid there tithe and offerings to Him?:-D. I knw say una no know. The answer is Emeka, Chinedu and Okechukwu, all from the east. Now you get the point. Thank u.

Lol, na so we use fear stay for onitsha head bridge for almost 45minutes or there about.
Aluter continua, victory acerta. We entered our motor and started the journey small small small, after waiting for the first set of buses move without much hitches, We followed suite. By the time we encountered the Bakassi bois they were almost at the other end of onitsha, with one man on hancuff in there midst of whom i supposedly was there new culprit.
The man was crying and begging for his dear life. I almost shaded tears for this man. Kai my guy de shout 'abeg bros i no go thief again.....' On getting closer they were doing some security check, u know. They let ur vehicle stop a bit, that
Way they can peruse their eyes on the vehicle to make sure no thief or so was inside. The bus in our front was taking a whole lot of time, but after said and done, they certified it and allowed them go. Next was my bus, and then heaven were let loosed.

Sori 4d break in transmition. I alredy told u wat nepa can do, and my pentium 2 laptop no com get backup, u know the rest. Am alwaz at their mercy.

In case someone is touched by the spirit to sow a seed of his farely used laptop dat is beta dan mine i wunt hesitate to accept cus dis wil go a long way in making sure we serve u beta.

Once again the entire company regreat any inconviniencies our unavoidable absence might have caused. Thank u

Have u ever experience hoodlums coming to rob in ur neighbourhood. Like the house to house robbery tin. Maybe ur houx happens to be at the tale end of the the street they are robbing.
My guy u go die before they get dia. Expecialy if u gat nothing to offer them.

The kind of experience i had was similar to the one i just mentioned.

They started by telling our driver to pack very well. Next tin was evrybody should come down. From the look on my face u could see that dia was no blood left in my vein any longer. I was still as stone where i was sitting. I could barely recal what was hapening with the other passengers. My guy dis one pass say u chop liver or u no chop liver.
Not when a group of hapy gun and cutlass carrying young men are brandishing cutlasses al around me.

Before i came down from the bus one taught immediatly came to me.
I brought out my new blackberry, with the fyn young gal sitting by my side keenly watching, i made a gesture of telling her to help me hide my 'precious jewel'. She stared at me 4sum seconds as if to say, 'am i mad'?. But with sum stroke of luck i must say, she collected the phone 4rm me and stuck it into her bra. At first it was bulging out and was quite obvious for one to notice that she was hiding sumtin in her bra. Spontaneously, as if she knew wat i was tinking she changed direction and readily hid it in her undies. Inbetween her legs i presumed, cus immediately her hand was reaching 4her 'bemuda triangle' i had to turn my face the other way pretending i never knew wat she did.
I was filled wit mixed feeling. One i was greatful 4her kind gesture. 2 i was feeling sory 4my blackberry. Kai my phone don suffer. Will my phone ever come to life again after undergoin this regorous exercise. Na wao. Truely dias no short cut to life atal.

We took out queue one by one, out of the bus and went down to where we were asked to line up in single file.
Re: My Blackberry Phone Experience by Dhortunn(m): 1:29pm On Aug 29, 2013
I'm still here o..no shaking, abeg no starve us sha
1 Like
Re: My Blackberry Phone Experience by sambroose(m): 2:12pm On Aug 29, 2013
I just deposited N500,000. ma guy hope u done see am, oya come continue Jor
1 Like
Re: My Blackberry Phone Experience by Chinatownm(op): 6:36pm On Aug 29, 2013
Dhortunn: I'm still here o..no shaking, abeg no starve us sha
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Dhortunn my guy i de feel ur presence.
Re: My Blackberry Phone Experience by Chinatownm(op): 6:38pm On Aug 29, 2013
sambroose: I just deposited N500,000. ma guy hope u done see am, oya come continue Jor
.
My man, u na chairman na. I blv u die. My phone just give me signal, i knw say my peppee don rest.
Re: My Blackberry Phone Experience by Nobody: 8:13pm On Aug 29, 2013
Brethren,rememba"MAGA NO NEED PAY"nd God lovs a cheerful giver.Make he no b like say me mah stingy i don donate som MB 2ur act.Abeg manage am...*dial=*12345*100#to chk ur data balance..No vex o...Na mb i fit donate
1 Like
Re: My Blackberry Phone Experience by Chinatownm(op): 2:10am On Aug 30, 2013
Phinity318: Brethren,rememba"MAGA NO NEED PAY"nd God lovs a cheerful giver.Make he no b like say me mah stingy i don donate som MB 2ur act.Abeg manage am...*dial=*12345*100#to chk ur data balance..No vex o...Na mb i fit donate
.
Phinity, lol God loves a chearful giver, but na only when u give God wetin Him want. Ask cain hw far wit im sacrife, im too na chearful giver too o.

But u knw say d ministry needs money in order to properly move to our permanent site, so any donated whatsoever will be appreciated.
Meet my PA, Jchime for more infor. Thank u 4ur suport
Re: My Blackberry Phone Experience by chukxy44(m): 8:01am On Aug 30, 2013
Love the way you write, enjoying the story all the way. Stuff like this are more worthy of front page. More update bro!
1 Like
Re: My Blackberry Phone Experience by Nobody: 1:39pm On Aug 30, 2013
lol grin
1 Like
Re: My Blackberry Phone Experience by chukxy44(m): 12:44pm On Sep 01, 2013
Happy New Mths peeps. @Chinatown, bro be kind enough to come finish dis ur tori
Re: My Blackberry Phone Experience by Nobody: 6:53pm On Sep 01, 2013
WE WANT MOREEE
Re: My Blackberry Phone Experience by Chinatownm(op): 9:22pm On Sep 02, 2013
chukxy44: Happy New Mths peeps. @Chinatown, bro be kind enough to come finish dis ur tori
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Like serioxly i will. Coming up shortly
Re: My Blackberry Phone Experience by Chinatownm(op): 9:24pm On Sep 02, 2013
Shawnmayor: WE WANT MOREEE
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Oliver twist u'll get more
Re: My Blackberry Phone Experience by Chinatownm(op): 3:31pm On Sep 09, 2013
Wait o na after onitsha bridge we still de? Na wa o dis bakassi bois no go kill peson 4here.
Re: My Blackberry Phone Experience by Amyceilyn(f): 9:43am On Sep 10, 2013
Wow 9c story,am glued keep the gist cuming,u ar doin gud already
Re: My Blackberry Phone Experience by Madawaki01(m): 11:56am On Sep 10, 2013
Following
Re: My Blackberry Phone Experience by Nastydroid(m): 1:27am On Oct 01, 2013
where this IBO boy go sef *grabs kuli kuli and zobo* I dy wait for u, you can see I bought vip ticket
Re: My Blackberry Phone Experience by Chinatownm(op): 5:02pm On Nov 06, 2013
Dis nairaland can be annoyin sumtimes. Imagine me writing a story of almost 4200 words twice only to upload and the rubbish site telin me stupid tins lik u cant upload at d moment temporary kiniko.
Infact i was discouraged. Tel me hw wil sum1 stil blame gudluck whn seun cant handle his own constituency.
2mao peson go coment say na gudluck cos am.
Smh like serioxly.

Am poised 4more update if only seun wil allow me.
Re: My Blackberry Phone Experience by Chinatownm(op): 3:32am On Feb 05, 2015
hw I take forget say I de here bfore before. o tio
Re: My Blackberry Phone Experience by Chinatownm(op): 3:33am On Feb 05, 2015
Mehn its been a long time coming. sum fiful go tink say I don finally go context for the chairmanship position for my local government. make una no vex, na condition make crayfish bend.
Chinatownm:
Dis nairaland can be annoyin sumtimes. Imagine me writing a story of almost 4200 words twice only to upload and the rubbish site telin me stupid tins lik u cant upload at d moment temporary kiniko.
Infact i was discouraged. Tel me hw wil sum1 stil blame gudluck whn seun cant handle his own constituency.
2mao peson go coment say na gudluck cos am.
Smh like serioxly.
Am poised 4more update if only seun wil allow me.
Mehn its been a long time coming. sum fiful go tink say I don finally go context for the chairmanship position for my local government. make una no vex, na condition make crayfish bend.
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