₦airaland Forum

lanicky:
What kinda broom?!

KingTom:
My wife is also on Nairaland

lanicky:
Yes!!

KingTom:
****In Tinubu voice****
Hay Peee Ceee

LogoDWhiz:
I go commot that tongue.

Its past your bed time dear.

Lemme go and tuck u into ur bed

lanicky:
Into my bed?! Woa! Can't wait

KingTom:
Oko na Husband na, but Oko means dick

lanicky:
U're already laughing na.

Okays..lemme tell u *whispers*

Last week while we were about to share d grace after our morning devotion....some1 ran into the shop shouting *pls help me*

I opened one eye to look at the ghost wey enter...but alas! Lotta ERUIKU's (agent of death ) entered almost immediately with sharp nd dangerous objects including....Stones, cutlass nd big sticks..
Hehehe!...I bn don dey speak in tongues...If na u waiten u go do?

I ran under a table....but the table dey vex..he no hide me wella... I ran under a big bag...but na dat one bad pass....the bag no gree hide my a.ss..chai! Na dat day I know say big yansh no good.

Hmmm! As I no see where me go package my whole body...na so I kon comot...I faced one of the guys who came in...I said "Bross good morning"

Shuu! The guy no dey look uche face oo...his face strong pass akpu. He roared like a lion...He said "where's the guy who ran into this place?"

I was like...shuu! See waec question oo...
I replied him..."uncle...I didn't see any guy"

Sincerely...I saw d guy when he entered our toilet....but I didn't want to tell those guys....something (maybe na holy spirit) told me to pretend as if I don't know where the guy is.

The guy with bloodshot eyes like Jigsawkillah's ordered the remaining guys to check every department in our plaza...they checked the boutique which was upstairs...I followed them though....they might be thief..... Know naija guys na

My fellow prayer warriors don tear race...na only me remain for battle grand...lmao

Some of the girls said....they would tell those badt guys where the innocent boy is hiding...I warned them not to....I even threaten them with sack letter.....I don't blame them though ,they were afraid na

I was the only one inside the whole complex...I was staying close to the toilet so they won't enter....I locked the door firmly nd I removed the key....I WANTED TO SAVE THIS UNKNOWN GUY...WHO BEGGED EARNESTLY FOR HELP.

THOSE badt guys noticed a kinda fowl play.....so they threatened to beat the day light outta me...I was a lil bit afraid but I was unwilling to tell them what they wanted..

I called big mum....as I was about to talk....some of the guys shouted at me to end the call immediately...I ended it by giving mum a clue bout what was going on....
I know she would call back..so I silenced my phone...I stylishly picked the call.....I told her to inform police but later I told her not to inform them cos I didn't want the police to know where he his.

To cut the long story short, hmmm! those badt guys left but promised to come back with more guys.....but they didn't.

When I opened the toilet....lo nd behold! the guy in d toilet was some1 I know. Some1 who had offended me b4, some1 who set me up.....I was surprised!!

I acted according to a yoruba adage which says..."bí a ba n jà, kín sé bi tí tíka kukú" (even if we're fighting...it's not possible to kill or allow peeps to be killed.

I fought for him, I saved him from the death's mouth(actually, it was Although I was almost beaten but God saved me.

KingTom nd dre11 would've made a gr8 fun of me....

Dat was ao God saved me from the snares of the evil ones.


The end

KingTom:
Bros I am a married man

khiaa:
MARRIED!!!

LogoDWhiz:
Hope u aren't believing kingtom

lanicky:
How do u mean?

LogoDWhiz:
Hope u aren't believing kingtom

khiaa:
MARRIED!!!

KingTom:
No yes no

chimerase2:
kingtom u dy spoil dis small gal
So u just cum corner dis gal for tight cornr de teach [size=28pt]amu dick[/size] abi kai

lanicky:
Local peeps them...smh

LogoDWhiz:
Rotfl.

I still refuse to bliv.

What's her username?

U mean she's watching all your flirting?

lanicky:
I ran under a table....but the table dey vex..he no hide me wella... I ran under a big bag...but na dat one bad pass....the bag no gree hide my a.ss..chai! Na dat day I know say big yansh no good.

KingTom nd dre11 would've made a gr8 fun of me....


The end

khiaa:
You excepted the role of my sidepiece while being married all alone?
Tom, you got some explaining to do.

KingTom:
I'm single

khiaa:
Are you sure? Who is this wife you have on Nairialand?
Happy Birthday Dear Heart. Enjoy your day.

KingTom:
Thank you ma, I do not have a wife on NL o

khiaa:
You better not have one, you don't know how close you came to me ----- ----- ------ out ----- you!!

daveP:
Lanicky that your gist sweet no be small. Abeg re-narrate it again and spice am wella.

Wait so kingtom..... If you think im surprised@ the married part then youre IBADAN. Im surprised your brought Khiaa along. Right glad i am!

dont believe him o

@Kingtom- dont bother washing off the powder, more coming@ the top of the hour.

KingTom:
Jesus!!!!!!!!

KingTom:
Bad belle

daveP:
check out adaobi12....

is it her?


remove the dot and search.(whispers) chiwi chaaa shsow wdgd yes yes

KingTom:
Hmmmmmmmmmmmmm Is it what I'm thinking?

LogoDWhiz:
Yeah.

Change into your nyt wears!
Or u do sleep n***d?

When you're through wit that, lemme know.

khiaa:
I don't know what you are thinking, but if I had to guess I would say, yes.no.yes