₦airaland Forum

Ozigbondu:
GEJ till 2019

Gboliwe:
As a matter of fact, e get as the opposition will make noise we will extend it to 2023.

babs01:
Afta March 28 another thread will hit Fp with heading " HILARIOUS!!! pics of GEJ in Kirikiri"

Wole Sanyeri:
[b]Hi readers. I am not a politician as you all know, but I can do far far better than GEJ, aka, MR CLUELESS. I can fight Boko Haram and overcome them within a year, because all I need to do is release 50 trillion out of the 100 trillion naira(50 billon dollars yearly) budgeted for security so that our armies can buy ammunitions and overcome Boko Haram, facing them fire for fire.

I can make electricity supply never interrupted just the way they did in Cameroon and other smaller countries in Africa. All I need do is release 50% of the money allocated for electricity while I pocket the rest, but Jonathan pocketed 99% and released just 1%.

I can curtail public and international shame by controlling my wife, not allowing her to bomb the whole Nigerians with her atomic/nuclear grammar which is contributing immensely to global warming, depleting the ozone layer.

I can build refineries in Nigeria by removing fuel subsidy just as Jonathan did, but instead of pocketing 100% of the proceedings from the subsidy removal, I will pocket only 50% which amounts to 500 trillion naira and then build 50 refineries with the remaining 500 trillion naira.

I would not have allowed Boko Haram to get to Sambisa forest if I was the president. As soon as the news reaches me that Boko Haram has kidnapped more than 200 chibok's girl, I will immediately send my armies to Borno and ask them to block all ways while the airforce stays in the sky and navy gets to the sea(after all, I am the C-in-C of the armed Robbers Forces.

I will not live in assumption like our president who will first say everything is untrue before finally admitting. I will not say Chibok's girls kidnap is a rumour. I will not say Fayose's election rigging tape is false when I haven't proven it. I will find it out at first.

If I was GEJ, I will probe anyone who steals money and not say STEALING IS NOT CORRUPTION. I will allow EFCC to function, like in OBJ'S time, many corrupt people were probed by EFCC, e.g JOSHUA DARIYE, ALAMEISEIGHA, TAFA BALOGUN, THIS WOMAN SPEAKER(forgotten her name now), etc. But during our JEGudujera's time, he allowed all of them go free and gave them ministerial appointments. I won't allow that in my regime.

I will build a strong accord with other good countries who are rich and surely they will visit my country and help. I will not turn my back against their good advice.

I will not overcharge MTN, AIRTEL and ETISALAT so that they will not also overcharge our citizens, just like in other countries. I will stop importation of generators because I will give an everlasting solution to electricity problem.

I will not bribe people with dollars to buy their votes and I will not bring empty barrels of oil into the country, lying that I am an oil magnate who personally took my oil outside to be refined.

If I am a president, I will steer clear of sponsoring some goons out their to protest against another man coming into the presidency. I will not take the shame of this nation to international level(if you have watched the video of the CHATHAM protest you will never want to vote for JEGudujera your president because those people were interviewed in the video and they responded justvas clueless as your president).

If I am the president, my re-election would have been a free ride like Obama's, OBJ's just because I would have made one good thing that people will commend me for( OBJ was commended for his ability to bring marked improvement to science and technology by introducing ICT to NIGERIA, Yar'adua made oil price to reduce; stopped Niger-Delta militancy(just in two years)) but all that JEGudujera could do was to 'invent' BOKO HARAM, increase oil price, spoil the rate of naira to dollar, allow BH to kill 16,000 people, allow his wife to blow us with headache, cough and catarrh with her virus-infested grammar, bring the badluck of EBOLA to Nigeria(because as much as I know, those things don't get to us b4 his regime, we only hear them with our ears).

Lastly, if I am GEJ, all the dollars OBJ kept safe to at least help Nigerian economy in case of emergency like this, I will not go in there to take them and spend. I will not pay Okonjo Iweala in dollars. I will not launch a scam-satellite which cannot detect BH until they got to sambisa forest; I will not make Koro(bitterness) a minister; I will not politicise religion by paying people like fake pastor 'Bosah' to be shedding false tears.

NB: To avoid being searched for by PDP/GEJ, I hereby write this open speech incognito, using the names of my role model(Wole) and the name of my favourite comedian(Sanyeri) as my name.

Congratulations in ADVANCE of MARCH 28 SUCCESS!!!

babs01:
Afta March 28 another thread will hit Fp with heading " HILARIOUS!!! pics of GEJ in Kirikiri"

babs01:
Afta March 28 another thread will hit Fp with heading " HILARIOUS!!! pics of GEJ in Kirikiri"

Gboliwe:
As a matter of fact, e get as the opposition will make noise we will extend it to 2023.