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Marriage Software! - Jokes Etc - Nairaland

Nairaland ForumEntertainmentJokes EtcMarriage Software! (944 Views)

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Marriage Software! by MrCEO69(op):
I laughed after reading this, think I should share a little humour
These is a joke but it has a lot to do with programming...lol just have to share it here dnt knw if here will be the right place for it. it not mod u can do the needful.

This is what a guy wrote to a Systems Analyst - (Marriage Software Div);

Dear Systems Analyst,
I am desperate for some help! I recently upgraded my program from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 and found that the new program began unexpected Child Processing and also took up a lot of space and valuable resources. This wasn't mentioned in the product brochure. In
addition Wife 1.0 installs itself into all other programs and launches during systems initialization and then it monitors all other system activities.
Applications such as "Boys' Night out 2.5" and "Golf 5.3" no longer run, and crashes the system whenever selected. Attempting to operate selected "Soccer 6.3" always fails and "Shopping 7.1" runs instead. I cannot seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background whilst attempting to run any of my favorite applications. Be it online or offline. I am thinking of going back to "Girlfriend 7.0", but uninstall doesn't work on this program. Can you please help?


.... The Systems Analyst replied:

Dear Customer,
This is a very common problem resulting from a basic misunderstanding of the functions of the Wife 1.0 program. Many customers upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 thinking that Wife 1.0 is merely a UTILITY AND ENTERTAINMENT PROGRAM. Actually, Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING
SYSTEM designed by its Creator to run everything on your current platform.
You are unlikely to be able to purge Wife 1.0 and still convert back to Girlfriend 7.0, as Wife 1.0 was not designed to do this and it is impossible to uninstall, delete or purge the program files from the System once it is installed.
Some people have tried to install Girlfriend 8.0 or Wife 2.0 but have ended up with even more problems. (See manual under Alimony/Child
Support and Solicitors' Fees).
Having Wife 1.0 installed, I recommend you keep it Installed and deal with the difficulties as best as you can. When any faults or problems occur, whatever you think has caused them, you must
run the.........

C:\ APOLOGIZE\ FORGIVE ME.EXE Program and avoid attempting to use the *Esc-Key for it will freeze the entire system.

It may be necessary to run C:\ APOLOGIZE\ FORGIVE ME.EXE a number of times, and eventually hope that the operating system will return to normal.
Wife 1.0, although a very high maintenance programme, can be very rewarding.
To get the most out of it, consider buying additional Software such as "Flowers 2.0" and "Chocolates 5.0" or "HUGS\ KISSES 600.0" or
"TENDERNESS\ UNDERSTANDING 1000.0" or even Eating Out Without the Kids 7.2.1" (if Child processing has already started).
DO NOT under any circumstances install "Secretary 2.1" (Short Skirt Version) or "One Nightstand 3.2" (Any Mood Version), as this is not a supported Application for Wife 1.0 and the system will almost certainly CRASH.

BEST WISHES!
Yours,
Systems Analyst
CC Lala247
Cc:lalasticlala C
c:ishilove
Re: Marriage Software! by Dbestmax(m): 6:20am On May 07, 2015
LM FAO...dis is crazy...y not use format 7.2.2...I.e kill her
Re: Marriage Software! by dajoaneke(m): 6:20am On May 07, 2015
Very entertaining v10.10
No uninstall fire Wife v1.0 till either Death (Ultimate Edition) v1.0 crashes the os or hardware. Goodluck (PEG edition) v29.5.2015
Re: Marriage Software! by Craigston: 6:53am On May 07, 2015
Blenyo11
Re: Marriage Software! by sisqology(m): 7:19am On May 07, 2015
I laff in otueke language
Re: Marriage Software! by adexsimply(m): 8:07am On May 07, 2015
Epic
Re: Marriage Software! by MrCEO69(op): 5:06am On May 08, 2015
Dbestmax:
LM FAO...dis is crazy...y not use format 7.2.2...I.e kill her
lol.. That will cause system attack by virus #COP
Re: Marriage Software! by MrCEO69(op): 5:08am On May 08, 2015
sisqology:
I laff in otueke language
how is that done! Teach me. Lol
Re: Marriage Software! by huhmuhyehmi(m): 10:26am On May 08, 2015
笑笑笑笑笑笑笑海海海海


I laugh in chinese

will back to laugh in programming..

1 Reply

Marriage Software DiscoveredLOL!! Check Out This Marriage Software.234

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