₦airaland Forum

Nne, It could even cost more. Those villagers don't send you. The one I attended cost more because they had to bury the great grandmother first; otherwise, it is believed all those involved at the burial would die. It's tradition. lol

Suigeneris93:
Wow! This is smth, these men should have the fear of God na

Ngalaba1:
WOW!! Thanks for sharing your experience. Thank God you did not laugh at the drama. It is a very funny one that you are not permitted to let the cat out of the bag as it is. I think it is possible they have gone to visit and disclosed the true picture to each of these persons individually before that collective meeting you attended? I think so. Meanwhile, you did not buy cow Are you sure? Killing of COW I think is usually a MUST. 600K is okay, it could be higher. Ok.

The list from d maternal people was for their private consumption. Its different from what we used to entertain other visitors. They call it their 'right'. But we killed a cow and my inlaw also gave us an extra one making two. D 600k was just a guess, we spent way more than dat

Soloblincus:
The list from d maternal people was for their private consumption. Its different from what we used to entertain other visitors. They call it their 'right'. But we killed a cow and my inlaw also gave us an extra one making two. D 600k was just a guess, we spent way more than dat

Oh, I get it now...they are called the ''Umu-Ada''. lol. That was their major and perhaps last chance to obtain from you guys as their son is no more. I think burial is more expensive than marriage? lol

Well, this tradition differ from place to place in igbo land. In my place, Obowo in imo state, you hardly do such. Burial is not a problem. 50k is enough for burial but you can do how u like. Wives is almost free cos we don't marry among ourself. So culture differs.

Suigeneris93:
Great, I know my roots but I'd rather save my family the stress of taking my body home for burial when there are cemeteries around. Truth is, my dead body won't hv a say in where its buried.

even if you are buried out there your family must also perform the necessary burial rites unless they are prepared to answer for your death.

meezynetwork:
Well, this tradition differ from place to place in igbo land. In my place, Obowo in imo state, you hardly do such. Burial is not a problem. 50k is enough for burial but you can do how u like. Wives is almost free cos we don't marry among ourself. So culture differs.

For the Abians & Imos, marriages and burials are made simple and easy (am from Abia) but the Anambras make it a big issue (am married there).
We attended a burial of a young man of 43 at Ikenga yesterday and you won't believe what we saw.

The man was interred weeks ago with "ippu akwa", laying of wrappers where family and friends will honour the dead with presentation of different types of wrappers and gifts.

The church mourned him on Wednesday while in laws mourned yesterday. Every in law will bring about 4 cartons of malt, 3 cartons of beer, cook rice and stew for Umu Ada, put money in about 7 envelopes and come with a dance group.

We announced our presence by dancing around the arena, while spraying money on our wife, presented the drinks.

We then proceeded to adorn our wife with different wrappers to the clapping and admiration of the Umu Ada. We sprayed her money again.

Our wife then danced around for another spraying.

They then entertained us and we danced again thru the arena to announce our exit. We were given small and chicken to present to the musicians we hired (musicians are on ground to be hired for a fee).

A woman's burial costs much more.

When we buried my parents, we simply entertained the guests after internment and that was that. But for my parents in law, we fed umu okpu for a week, breakfast, lunch and dinner.

They drank Milo and milk in the mornings (no Lipton ). The yams are cut in big portions like a tuber of yam may be cut into depending on the size and its rice and stew (jollof is NO NO)

Soloblincus:
I can relate with some of this. When my father died, we went to his maternal home to 'reveal' d news officially alongside my uncles and some elders. Though they were already aware bt had to pretend as tradition demands.On getting there, d spokesman said dat he (my fada) was very ill and hospitalized and dat we dont know wat to do. Then d head of d family (maternal) asked 4 d name of d hospital and location. He was told it was close by. So he said we shuld bring 5k for flight(plane) so they can send someone 2 go c him immediately. My uncle told me d moni culd hav been more had d distance been farther. We gave d moni and someone took it, went outside and came back 2mins lata, then shaked his head and said he met my fada very sick in d hospital but b4 he could say a word, he gave up the ghost. Immediately everyone started lamenting. I almost laughed at d whole drama. After that, the maternal people then drafted a list of things to provide for them for d burial. One cow, 2 goats, kolanuts, crates of beer etc. It was like a marriage, even more than. They said d list was drafted according to d dead persons level in d society, dat my fada wus nt a poor man.But we negiotiated till d cow was removed and some others reduced. Aside this list, my kingdred also brought their list. We spent well over 600k for that burial. It was something else. Btw, i am 4rm imo state .

This is serious.

Need more views on this thread.

..

Ngalaba1:
Little did I know until I went for a burial this past Christmas Holiday in Igboland. I thought having money was enough to make burial happen as people come to eat and drink basically in this part of the world during burials. The ‘’Umu-Ada’’ and Co. were so problematic and difficult that I was very angry to comprehend their issues. They fine you for anyone passing by without greeting those dug the grave ‘’Daalu Oru’’ meaning- ‘’well done’’. They fine the children for building beautiful houses in thier father’s compound/land (where the mother lived and took care of obviously); this fine is because you did not build any special house for your mother with a modern kitchen too....and they ask you to build it before she is buried oo on the day of the burial!? Like seriously? Thank God everything went well eventually; they had everything provided for them but were unsatisfied. They claimed it was their last opportunity to be appreciated since their sister, daughter, niece/nephew had embarked on a journey of no return.
This nasty experience led me to asking more questions from those who live in the village and I discovered it is same in all Igbo culture. In fact, I thought it was only marrying in Igbo land that was hectic, burial is twice hectic and may be more difficult especially when you are based outside of the eastern territories- ‘’Abroad People’’ as they refer to those not living in the eastern Nigeria.
I heard a shocking story of how a woman whom I knew as a growing child those days in the village died sometime in 2015 and how the casket had to be changed as the burial did not hold on the date scheduled, neither did it hold the day after. Hence, Caskets had to be changed because they could not drive the long distance to return her to the mortuary or were thinking the issues would be resolved sooner than it had taken. WhAT A STRESS THE CHILDREN MUST HAVE SUFFERED!!
WHAT HAPPENED? Their mother was not properly married according to tradition. He found her somewhere and they began living together and they began bearing children. She gave the man 7 BOYS, ONE GIRL! It was all good, the children were grown and living well, until the woman died. Obviously, in Igboland you CANNOT bury a woman’s corpse without the knowledge of the family, IF YOU LOVE YOURSELF. That was the genesis of the revelation. The woman’s family (immediate and extended) said they were not aware their daughter was even married, let alone having children. How can their daughter be down with sickness or even that she went somewhere and has refused to return. The Man had to marry her in the FULL traditional way IN DEATH and of course was made to Kiss her Corpse as a newly married in death!! Then they went on to burying the deceased grandmother, mother and father who died donkey years ago before they could bury their mother . I was also told that if a man/woman dies, you dare not inform the family directly of the news, you keep beating about the bush until the message is received. If you break it directly, you would explain what killed the son/daughter to them and this is a VERY SERIOUS MATTER!!
This is a First hand information of what happened in my State in the Eastern Coast of Nigeria..
If you are living with an Igbo lady/woman and she is bearing you children, you have not married her properly just co-habitation, please; it is not just God you are sinning against, YOU MIGHT JUST BE in for something that would become complicated in future! IF THAT LADY/WOMAN dies living with you, you are in a VERY BIG TROUBLE.
Thought I should update those who might be less updated like me until I experienced it as a grown up now. Feel free to counter whatever was said if your own culture is different and you are Igbo or better still, share your knowledge about burials in Igbo Land. IGBO KWENU!! NIGERIA KWE ZU O NU!!!HIAAA!!!



CC: Nairaland

Ibo get problem and their problem is not of this world Ahh swear!

What is Umu Ada and what is Oriaku? Must be something sweet.
Anyway, whatever they are get me some.