₦airaland Forum

This question is very pertinent to all skeptics, agnostics, freethinkers, atheists, deists,pastafarians, secular-humanists or whatever one is comfortable identifying by.

It first started to grow in my mind when I began to have doubts about the unverified truth claims of all organised religions. One day, I was in a church service attending a program for youths. The speaker was going on and on about one new testament verse that goes something like "do not be unequally yoked with an unbeliever". Unbeliever in this context did not mean freethinkers alone. It extends to doubting Thomases, members with poor attendances, "baby xtians", non active members. In some extreme cases some preachers are wary of their members dating xtians of a different denomination. This is popular with the DeeperLife sect. Catholics too are wary of marrying Protestants and it could be argued that this mistrust is stronger when viewed vice- versa.

Now, I know that freethinkers by the Very nature of their belief system and philosophies are not insular like "faith-heads". Because we "think freely" we view all believers as the same and we are likely to date many. Especially if these paramours are only moderately religious. In fact the mere fact that we are still way too few(despite the recent surge in our numbers) means we are more likely to find an attractive christian or moslem, date and even marry one (and maybe divorce one)

Also, many freethinkers happen to drop their faith long after they are dating/gotten married to some person they met at fellowship or church or mosque(how likely is that with the holy separation during worship). They no longer share the same preposterous beliefs but they still love the person wholly. Often times they keep their new thoughts to themselves and even tag along with their spouses to the place of worship, all the while cringing inside!!! Am sure a lot of people will identify with this.

So l am going to turn that bible verse on its head and ask. Should we be unequally yoked with unbelievers? I ask because believers have overflogged this issue. It is most common when a spouse turns his back on a religion.

Does Love change the fact that your partner doubts evolution, believes earth is 6000 yrs, believes Mohammed flew to heaven on a winged horse, believes many people will perish in an oven for eternity and lives her/his life on many other dastardly and harebrained truth claims?

Well if you are just into kpanshing/friends-with-benefits/ casual dating then beliefs don't matter at all. Feel free to have fun and move on.

But if you are a non-religious fellow spending the rest of your life with a religious person, this is a big deal and even if it's not obvious now it will soon become so and may result in the disintegration/imbalance of a union. The world is full of stories like this. Quick example;an American pastor,Dan Barker who became an atheist was soon divorced by his wife who deeply believed it was her calling to marry a pastor! It was a mutual and non-messy one (many arent')but think of the trauma to the poor kids!Beliefs do matter.

So how do we Handle this? I wanna hear your thoughts.

It's like caging a Dunce and a DON together.

orisa37:
It's like caging a Dunce and a DON together.

The believers would say the same thing. They will quote " a fool says in his heart, there is no god". Name-calling won't solve a thing.

orisa37:
It's like caging a Dunce and a DON together.

Not cool

Free thinkers should be free with everyone

I am free with everyone. I really do not care. And as long as "believers" are close to me, they will continually have to prove that their god exists

On the relationship side, I personally cannot..... But I can so far the girl is not tenacious or bigot.... I mean, if I know that you won't even listen, why should I waste my time with you??




It's headache when theists don't listen or try to. Just like ValentineMary, my ex also dumped me because I told her I was an atheist (still one)... So I made up my mind that come what may, before I ask a girl out, she must know I am an atheist..... One girl asked me out recently on Whatsapp.... I told her, I am an atheist and I cannot date without sex... She said I drop atheism for sex.


Took it as a joke, but then I just told her.... I cannot... She had to later agree..... You see, I cannot date on marry a bigot on a good day... Unless I see trait of willingness to accept my terns about religion, I would rather die single fucki ng hook ers whenever I am aroused than get married.

frank317:
Free thinkers should be free with everyone

I totally concur, But it's not as easy as you think. Checkout what valentinemary and dekatron posted about their experiences.

And what of d topic of how to raise d kids? That is Where real trouble will start!