This gon’ be quite lengthy

I have been in America, 5months plus 0now. I came on a Visa- B1/B2, but I came particularly to establish residency here. I am still within my i94- meaning, I have not overstayed yet, I am still legal and considering whether I should remain and forge ahead or go back before I fall out of status. Once I do- in next 30days, there’s no turning back.

Now, like I said, I wanted to establish residency here- the marriage route- probably fall in love, marry, get my green card, citizenship and enjoy the American dream, but now, am not too sure again. Life here is tough mehn, and atimes, I keep wondering if I should not just go back to Nigeria, and I am really tempted to pack it all up and go back.

America is not easy, at all, damn. It is one of the most difficult places to live. But at the risk of making it look like this is a hell hole, lemme quickly say that it is not that bad.

I started driving 10days after I got here- I bought a car (car no cost for this land, with $1000 I got a reasonable at the Auction) and go about where ever I want- I have never had cause to enter a bus or even train in this land.

Even before I bought a car, my friend used to come take me anywhere I wanted, once he was off work. I have a license too and where I stay, within the city, I sublet a room for $500 a month, in a 3bedroom apartment with one or two other guys I knew from home. Nothing fancy, just okay.

I still manage to TurnUp at the club (Naija or Akata Club) every Friday and can at least afford rail drinks for $10 or so- patron marguaritas, Tequilla, and draft beers for $5. At all at all na hin bad pass. I manage to take girls out for outings too where I can afford to buy them Quesadillas fajitas, crab cakes for $25 or $30 and run a tab upto like $60 or $70. Once in awhile. that is.

I got a minimum wage job at $9 an hour, 40hour week when I came but after two months, I couldn’t stand it and changed jobs. I was getting about $72, tax free but gave them notice of termination, a month ago- I was tired of their crummy job (lol). They knew I was working without authorization, through an agent and were probably thinking- where’s he gon go?’

But I did and at my new job now I earn double that and started a 2nd job last week where I earn similar pay. If I keep at it, am prolyl netting $300 a day or say about $5,000 a month (working from 10am to 12midninght, both jobs). Though I don’t have a wife or kids, I don’t know if this is the life I want at 36.

My friends have told me to hang in there, America is not easy when you first come, but things will improve. But when? With this clock in, clock out? I can’t even save, so I can’t even ‘do that iyawo thing’ (moderator, make una no vess) nor can I even get a girl and love her up soooootay I nudge her up to the altar (am I being too much in a haste?) after which, with my IT certifications, I can be getting $40 or 45 an hour.

But this not even about money- this land is a strange society, everything is inverted from what we know in Nigeria. You can make all that money and not still be happy. I’ll be happier driving a tokunboh car in Nigeria that a mint new car from a dealer on the Interstate 5 in Cali or I85 in Atlanta, with car notes to boot.

But then, was my life really that okay in Nigeria? Well, up to a point it was- till the last 18months when things got so bad I couldn’t even pay my rent. I was thrown out of my house and moved into an uncle’s empty flat, never earned a dime within that period and had to actually sell my offroader (jeep) and other belongings to fund my American journey. If I got 10k or 5k within that period, somone gifted me that money.

But with power of hindsight now, I was still happy, with people, with family, going to crowded markets, beer with friends in the evening, that sense of community and better weather(which I hated then anyway) And its not like I just woke up and relocate to America o, I have been visiting, but meeehn, the reality of living here is way different than visiting, and it seems I never even knew America.

So question now for my brothers and sisters- help me make a decision, and I have just a month to make this- should I go back to Nigeria or rough it out here? In this land that the girls even doing shakara for yo are these fat, obese overweight akata girls with three children? All wielding section 8 vouchers and food stamps, calling you with free goverment phone ala obama phone, or getting tax refunds from their w2 from care jobs. When you left sweet sweet girls in Naija dying for you, even when you couldnt afford fish for them?

In this land where english is a problem, as they cant understand your accent- where you always hear: say that again? You dare not do a phone interview, cos of your accent and your where your best bet is pushing for a one on one interview via mail, with the hope your appearance will make them overlook your accent. If they judge akata by skin color, they judge you by skin color and accent.

Where you cant even get a reasonable job till you show work authorization. In this land with brutal winters, where you cant get rich, just comfortable, but where you have all the basic amenities of life and security

Help a brother, and others hell bent on coming to America

Baba, this your story long no be small o

If you have certification that can get you a job here, you should come back home. Most people really just think "abroad" is the solution to the problem.

There are many people in Europe and America, who walk the streets in fear and expectation that it could be their last walk there, before being shipped home.

If you don't have "change" to start a business here, no certificate to work, my brother, stay there. With time, things will get better. There is a lot of suffering in this country. Some people that will advice you are just too comfortable to see it.

The bad part is, if you come home, people will be of the opinion that you have cash, and would expect money from you.

Be careful, take your time, weigh your options. May God bless you.

Don't really have what to say bro but you just realized your age 5 months in America? what were you doing back in Naija? it's your decision to make anyways!

Let me search for the meaning of summary, in fact no need nothing consigns ne

poshestmina:
Don't really have what to say bro but you just realized your age 5 months in America? what were you doing back in Naija? it's your decision to make anyways!

i was doing okay, bros. till things went south after i lost my job. i was staying in a 3 bedroom flat, my rent was one million, had two cars, visited america, asia and europe once ina while. for a 34yr old then, i was doin better than most. but around january 2015..i lost my job and then a few months later, savings of about 5m in a bad investment.

So as at dec 2016, i was at ground zero.

deeplow:
If you have certification that can get you a job here, you should come back home. Most people really just think "abroad" is the solution to the problem.

There are many people in Europe and America, who walk the streets in fear and expectation that it could be their last walk there, before being shipped home.

If you don't have "change" to start a business here, no certificate to work, my brother, stay there. With time, things will get better. There is a lot of suffering in this country. Some people that will advice you are just too comfortable to see it.

The bad part is, if you come home, people will be of the opinion that you have cash, and would expect money from you.

Be careful, take your time, weigh your options. May God bless you.

Exactly, bro. Even now, everybody is send me money, send me money..

theres really nothing to go back to.i sild everything. only th8ng is have there is a house, still in my name..which i have vowed not to sell

apache77:


i was doing okay, bros. till things went south after i lost my job. i was staying in a 3 bedroom flat, my rent was one million, had two cars, visited america, asia and europe once ina while. for a 34yr old then, i was doin better than most. but around january 2015..i lost my job and then a few months later, savings of about 5m in a bad investment.

So as at dec 2016, i was at ground zero.

I was actually talking about the getting married aspect ...i'm not bros .May God return all your loss .

poshestmina:
I was actually talking about the getting married aspect ...i'm not bros .May God return all your loss .

Sure..married a woman i dated 8years, married her for two. but when the crises came, she left.marriage crashed, no kids. so that was part of the reason i decided to relocate and and become americanah

apache77:


Sure..married a woman i dated 8years, married her for two. but when the crises came, she left.marriage crashed, no kids. so that was part of the reason i decided to relocate and and become americanah

Such sad story ! i think you should just stay there and make the best out of every and any situation except you have things to fall back to when u return or you are very well connected to get a job immediately you return otherwise America has better working conditions .goodluck !

apache77:


Exactly, bro. Even now, everybody is send me money, send me money..

theres really nothing to go back to.i sild everything. only th8ng is have there is a house, still in my name..which i have vowed not to sell

One thing I know for sure, is that i'd rather be dead broke in America, than be dead broke in Nigeria. Just be rugged, continue the 9usd per hour job, better offers will come.

The only job that is certain you can get in Naija is to work as a "bricklayer", and even that now, no vacancy. Baba, dey your Yankee dey hustle, just put your house up for rent.

apache77:
This gon’ be quite lengthy

I have been in America, 5months plus 0now. I came on a Visa- B1/B2, but I came particularly to establish residency here. I am still within my i94- meaning, I have not overstayed yet, I am still legal and considering whether I should remain and forge ahead or go back before I fall out of status. Once I do- in next 30days, there’s no turning back.

Now, like I said, I wanted to establish residency here- the marriage route- probably fall in love, marry, get my green card, citizenship and enjoy the American dream, but now, am not too sure again. Life here is tough mehn, and atimes, I keep wondering if I should not just go back to Nigeria, and I am really tempted to pack it all up and go back.

America is not easy, at all, damn. It is one of the most difficult places to live. But at the risk of making it look like this is a hell hole, lemme quickly say that it is not that bad.

I started driving 10days after I got here- I bought a car (car no cost for this land, with $1000 I got a reasonable at the Auction) and go about where ever I want- I have never had cause to enter a bus or even train in this land.

Even before I bought a car, my friend used to come take me anywhere I wanted, once he was off work. I have a license too and where I stay, within the city, I sublet a room for $500 a month, in a 3bedroom apartment with one or two other guys I knew from home. Nothing fancy, just okay.

I still manage to TurnUp at the club (Naija or Akata Club) every Friday and can at least afford rail drinks for $10 or so- patron marguaritas, Tequilla, and draft beers for $5. At all at all na hin bad pass. I manage to take girls out for outings too where I can afford to buy them Quesadillas fajitas, crab cakes for $25 or $30 and run a tab upto like $60 or $70. Once in awhile. that is.

I got a minimum wage job at $9 an hour, 40hour week when I came but after two months, I couldn’t stand it and changed jobs. I was getting about $72, tax free but gave them notice of termination, a month ago- I was tired of their crummy job (lol). They knew I was working without authorization, through an agent and were probably thinking- where’s he gon go?’

But I did and at my new job now I earn double that and started a 2nd job last week where I earn similar pay. If I keep at it, am prolyl netting $300 a day or say about $5,000 a month (working from 10am to 12midninght, both jobs). Though I don’t have a wife or kids, I don’t know if this is the life I want at 36.

My friends have told me to hang in there, America is not easy when you first come, but things will improve. But when? With this clock in, clock out? I can’t even save, so I can’t even ‘do that iyawo thing’ (moderator, make una no vess) nor can I even get a girl and love her up soooootay I nudge her up to the altar (am I being too much in a haste?) after which, with my IT certifications, I can be getting $40 or 45 an hour.

But this not even about money- this land is a strange society, everything is inverted from what we know in Nigeria. You can make all that money and not still be happy. I’ll be happier driving a tokunboh car in Nigeria that a mint new car from a dealer on the Interstate 5 in Cali or I85 in Atlanta, with car notes to boot.

But then, was my life really that okay in Nigeria? Well, up to a point it was- till the last 18months when things got so bad I couldn’t even pay my rent. I was thrown out of my house and moved into an uncle’s empty flat, never earned a dime within that period and had to actually sell my offroader (jeep) and other belongings to fund my American journey. If I got 10k or 5k within that period, somone gifted me that money.

But with power of hindsight now, I was still happy, with people, with family, going to crowded markets, beer with friends in the evening, that sense of community and better weather(which I hated then anyway) And its not like I just woke up and relocate to America o, I have been visiting, but meeehn, the reality of living here is way different than visiting, and it seems I never even knew America.

So question now for my brothers and sisters- help me make a decision, and I have just a month to make this- should I go back to Nigeria or rough it out here? In this land that the girls even doing shakara for yo are these fat, obese overweight akata girls with three children? All wielding section 8 vouchers and food stamps, calling you with free goverment phone ala obama phone, or getting tax refunds from their w2 from care jobs. When you left sweet sweet girls in Naija dying for you, even when you couldnt afford fish for them?

In this land where english is a problem, as they cant understand your accent- where you always hear: say that again? You dare not do a phone interview, cos of your accent and your where your best bet is pushing for a one on one interview via mail, with the hope your appearance will make them overlook your accent. If they judge akata by skin color, they judge you by skin color and accent.

Where you cant even get a reasonable job till you show work authorization. In this land with brutal winters, where you cant get rich, just comfortable, but where you have all the basic amenities of life and security

Help a brother, and others hell bent on coming to America

There's a psychological explanation for your dilemma. It's that feeling of "it doesn't worth it" which is what you get when you eventually get something and face the reality of having it. Or, may be you're just being homesick.

If everything you said about your earning is true, then it would even get better, if you're ready to weather it you would even earn more. However, you have to decide; do you want happiness and peace of mind or money? For me, I'll choose happiness and peace of mind over money.

But, even if anyone wants to make money, believe it or not, it's easier to make money in Nigeria than America.

America is a saturated land businesses wise. Africa is an untapped land. I'll soon be venturing into TV and radio, and it's pretty easier for me to do in Africa than America. The first mistake was traveling to America. I have a brother who has been there since the 1980's. Back in the days, he once came home during Christmas and he felt like not going back again. He kept repeating "there's nothing in America" and I believed him, cause I can see it from testimonials by people like you.

Comeb back joor, you want to go and suffer in obodo oyibo for nothing.

meanwhile these moderators, this is a good topic.

why have you not moved it to front page, so we get more insight.

next time, bros, post this in travel, where the moderators actually know what they are doing

apache77:
This gon’ be quite lengthy

I have been in America, 5months plus 0now. I came on a Visa- B1/B2, but I came particularly to establish residency here. I am still within my i94- meaning, I have not overstayed yet, I am still legal and considering whether I should remain and forge ahead or go back before I fall out of status. Once I do- in next 30days, there’s no turning back.

Now, like I said, I wanted to establish residency here- the marriage route- probably fall in love, marry, get my green card, citizenship and enjoy the American dream, but now, am not too sure again. Life here is tough mehn, and atimes, I keep wondering if I should not just go back to Nigeria, and I am really tempted to pack it all up and go back.

America is not easy, at all, damn. It is one of the most difficult places to live. But at the risk of making it look like this is a hell hole, lemme quickly say that it is not that bad.

I started driving 10days after I got here- I bought a car (car no cost for this land, with $1000 I got a reasonable at the Auction) and go about where ever I want- I have never had cause to enter a bus or even train in this land.

Even before I bought a car, my friend used to come take me anywhere I wanted, once he was off work. I have a license too and where I stay, within the city, I sublet a room for $500 a month, in a 3bedroom apartment with one or two other guys I knew from home. Nothing fancy, just okay.

I still manage to TurnUp at the club (Naija or Akata Club) every Friday and can at least afford rail drinks for $10 or so- patron marguaritas, Tequilla, and draft beers for $5. At all at all na hin bad pass. I manage to take girls out for outings too where I can afford to buy them Quesadillas fajitas, crab cakes for $25 or $30 and run a tab upto like $60 or $70. Once in awhile. that is.

I got a minimum wage job at $9 an hour, 40hour week when I came but after two months, I couldn’t stand it and changed jobs. I was getting about $72, tax free but gave them notice of termination, a month ago- I was tired of their crummy job (lol). They knew I was working without authorization, through an agent and were probably thinking- where’s he gon go?’

But I did and at my new job now I earn double that and started a 2nd job last week where I earn similar pay. If I keep at it, am prolyl netting $300 a day or say about $5,000 a month (working from 10am to 12midninght, both jobs). Though I don’t have a wife or kids, I don’t know if this is the life I want at 36.

My friends have told me to hang in there, America is not easy when you first come, but things will improve. But when? With this clock in, clock out? I can’t even save, so I can’t even ‘do that iyawo thing’ (moderator, make una no vess) nor can I even get a girl and love her up soooootay I nudge her up to the altar (am I being too much in a haste?) after which, with my IT certifications, I can be getting $40 or 45 an hour.

But this not even about money- this land is a strange society, everything is inverted from what we know in Nigeria. You can make all that money and not still be happy. I’ll be happier driving a tokunboh car in Nigeria that a mint new car from a dealer on the Interstate 5 in Cali or I85 in Atlanta, with car notes to boot.

But then, was my life really that okay in Nigeria? Well, up to a point it was- till the last 18months when things got so bad I couldn’t even pay my rent. I was thrown out of my house and moved into an uncle’s empty flat, never earned a dime within that period and had to actually sell my offroader (jeep) and other belongings to fund my American journey. If I got 10k or 5k within that period, somone gifted me that money.

But with power of hindsight now, I was still happy, with people, with family, going to crowded markets, beer with friends in the evening, that sense of community and better weather(which I hated then anyway) And its not like I just woke up and relocate to America o, I have been visiting, but meeehn, the reality of living here is way different than visiting, and it seems I never even knew America.

So question now for my brothers and sisters- help me make a decision, and I have just a month to make this- should I go back to Nigeria or rough it out here? In this land that the girls even doing shakara for yo are these fat, obese overweight akata girls with three children? All wielding section 8 vouchers and food stamps, calling you with free goverment phone ala obama phone, or getting tax refunds from their w2 from care jobs. When you left sweet sweet girls in Naija dying for you, even when you couldnt afford fish for them?

In this land where english is a problem, as they cant understand your accent- where you always hear: say that again? You dare not do a phone interview, cos of your accent and your where your best bet is pushing for a one on one interview via mail, with the hope your appearance will make them overlook your accent. If they judge akata by skin color, they judge you by skin color and accent.

Where you cant even get a reasonable job till you show work authorization. In this land with brutal winters, where you cant get rich, just comfortable, but where you have all the basic amenities of life and security

Help a brother, and others hell bent on coming to America

Boss based on my opinion... this is what I would advice You if You still want to stay in Yankee; as a Former Banker, Use Your Banking Contacts and Network...to get loans from Cooperatives , Private and Individual LenderS ot Loan Companies using Your house documents as Collateral and use the Cash to get a Yankee immigration lawyer to structure a 3 year before Payout arrangee contract babe ( that is If She leaves the arrangee contract before 3 years is upand before You get Yankee Passport she pays You 60,000 and if She leaves after 3 years when You have gotten Yankee passport , You pay her off only +-( ( 20000)
Lawyer or Your friend arranges the Lady and You do the agreement....make sure its a working class person with a lot to loose if She defaults and the lawyer too should be settled and the Money kept in Escrow.( Pay top dollar for the Lady and the Lawyer and get a working class lady.....no mix business with pleasure oooo
After that, if of works , when your Green Pali arrives, sharply join the Military or enter Nursing School to secure a well paying future career. From Your part time job, save up and keep servicing the interest payment on the Loans on Your house until You get a well paying Yankee job
.........Yankee.military would guarantee your papers, give You subsidized but not perfect housing and subsidized fair healthcare and subsidized Yankee education. Everything is a risk and no Venture, no gain. You can visits Naija from.time to.time. Make a smart Choice and please don't exceed Your present 1-94

If You have too.much money, contact an EB-5 immigration lawyer for U.s greencard by Investment ( 500 thousand to 1.5 million dollars)

Also check Australia skill shortage list and contact a Mara registered Australian immigration lawyer to see if You qualify for Country, State, Province , Region or Employed Skilled worker Immigration

Naija is so insecure now, You would need bucketloads of Capital to tap Opportunities which are mainly high Capital Intensive and high risk


Money without Comfort/ Social Life for some years or No Money and Social Life....Your Choice

apache77:


Sure..married a woman i dated 8years, married her for two. but when the crises came, she left.marriage crashed, no kids. so that was part of the reason i decided to relocate and and become americanah

why did she leave na. if the both of u were there, u wont be so lonely. i suggest the followin
1. go to nigerian churches were you can make friends, female ones
2. relocate to germany, i hear d weather is not so bad.
3. invite to come,(all expenses paid by u,of course.lol) people have told me they are never bored, sad or depressed when am around.

HRHQueenPhil:


why did she leave na. if the both of u were there, u wont be so lonely. i suggest the followin
1. go to nigerian churches were you can make friends, female ones
2. relocate to germany, i hear d weather is not so bad.
3. invite to come,(all expenses paid by u,of course.lol) people have told me they are never bored, sad or depressed when am around.

hmm...No3 sounds good.but you didnt read where i said am on minimum wage? like those protesting workers in nigeria yesterday collecting 18k.

WhistleB come and talk.

Justwise, can you please move this to the travel section?

apache77:
This gon’ be quite lengthy

I have been in America, 5months plus 0now. I came on a Visa- B1/B2, but I came particularly to establish residency here. I am still within my i94- meaning, I have not overstayed yet, I am still legal and considering whether I should remain and forge ahead or go back before I fall out of status. Once I do- in next 30days, there’s no turning back.

Now, like I said, I wanted to establish residency here- the marriage route- probably fall in love, marry, get my green card, citizenship and enjoy the American dream, but now, am not too sure again. Life here is tough mehn, and atimes, I keep wondering if I should not just go back to Nigeria, and I am really tempted to pack it all up and go back.

America is not easy, at all, damn. It is one of the most difficult places to live. But at the risk of making it look like this is a hell hole, lemme quickly say that it is not that bad.

I started driving 10days after I got here- I bought a car (car no cost for this land, with $1000 I got a reasonable at the Auction) and go about where ever I want- I have never had cause to enter a bus or even train in this land.

Even before I bought a car, my friend used to come take me anywhere I wanted, once he was off work. I have a license too and where I stay, within the city, I sublet a room for $500 a month, in a 3bedroom apartment with one or two other guys I knew from home. Nothing fancy, just okay.

I still manage to TurnUp at the club (Naija or Akata Club) every Friday and can at least afford rail drinks for $10 or so- patron marguaritas, Tequilla, and draft beers for $5. At all at all na hin bad pass. I manage to take girls out for outings too where I can afford to buy them Quesadillas fajitas, crab cakes for $25 or $30 and run a tab upto like $60 or $70. Once in awhile. that is.

I got a minimum wage job at $9 an hour, 40hour week when I came but after two months, I couldn’t stand it and changed jobs. I was getting about $72, tax free but gave them notice of termination, a month ago- I was tired of their crummy job (lol). They knew I was working without authorization, through an agent and were probably thinking- where’s he gon go?’

But I did and at my new job now I earn double that and started a 2nd job last week where I earn similar pay. If I keep at it, am prolyl netting $300 a day or say about $5,000 a month (working from 10am to 12midninght, both jobs). Though I don’t have a wife or kids, I don’t know if this is the life I want at 36.

My friends have told me to hang in there, America is not easy when you first come, but things will improve. But when? With this clock in, clock out? I can’t even save, so I can’t even ‘do that iyawo thing’ (moderator, make una no vess) nor can I even get a girl and love her up soooootay I nudge her up to the altar (am I being too much in a haste?) after which, with my IT certifications, I can be getting $40 or 45 an hour.

But this not even about money- this land is a strange society, everything is inverted from what we know in Nigeria. You can make all that money and not still be happy. I’ll be happier driving a tokunboh car in Nigeria that a mint new car from a dealer on the Interstate 5 in Cali or I85 in Atlanta, with car notes to boot.

But then, was my life really that okay in Nigeria? Well, up to a point it was- till the last 18months when things got so bad I couldn’t even pay my rent. I was thrown out of my house and moved into an uncle’s empty flat, never earned a dime within that period and had to actually sell my offroader (jeep) and other belongings to fund my American journey. If I got 10k or 5k within that period, somone gifted me that money.

But with power of hindsight now, I was still happy, with people, with family, going to crowded markets, beer with friends in the evening, that sense of community and better weather(which I hated then anyway) And its not like I just woke up and relocate to America o, I have been visiting, but meeehn, the reality of living here is way different than visiting, and it seems I never even knew America.

So question now for my brothers and sisters- help me make a decision, and I have just a month to make this- should I go back to Nigeria or rough it out here? In this land that the girls even doing shakara for yo are these fat, obese overweight akata girls with three children? All wielding section 8 vouchers and food stamps, calling you with free goverment phone ala obama phone, or getting tax refunds from their w2 from care jobs. When you left sweet sweet girls in Naija dying for you, even when you couldnt afford fish for them?

In this land where english is a problem, as they cant understand your accent- where you always hear: say that again? You dare not do a phone interview, cos of your accent and your where your best bet is pushing for a one on one interview via mail, with the hope your appearance will make them overlook your accent. If they judge akata by skin color, they judge you by skin color and accent.

Where you cant even get a reasonable job till you show work authorization. In this land with brutal winters, where you cant get rich, just comfortable, but where you have all the basic amenities of life and security

Help a brother, and others hell bent on coming to America

You made some excellent points
However, there is something you need to think about....In 10 years time looking back what decision are you likely to regret?

In Nigeria, a life of mediocrity is almost assured barring a divine intervention unless you enter the cabal. Here, you can live a good life and strive for better

It's not easy anywhere. However, I do have to say you have to think through the marriage thing. E NO EASY LIKE THAT.
Goodluck

Perfect definition of crossroads

Bros I think say na money them go there pack but your story come De sound like naija story.

Stumbled on this while doing a search with "sublet" as keyword. Interesting story and life plans. So how did it go? What did you decide?

poshestmina:
Such sad story ! i think you should just stay there and make the best out of every and any situation except you have things to fall back to when u return or you are very well connected to get a job immediately you return otherwise America has better working conditions .goodluck !

I second this. I think you're going through severe culture shock. Rough it out for at least a year and then revisit the issue again.