₦airaland Forum

adviserseeker:
I can't talk about her brother's girlfriend and reason for being with us on here. But note both of us are cool with it. No issues on that front.

Re staying with my parents or hers I really don't see any issues as my siblings ( 2 ladies) are there to take good care of her. But again if you are disagreeing with your husband on your kid visiting your parents you don't say, no and insist on the NO like the man has no say whatsoever.

Her greatest undoing - I am just a sissy that can be disrespected at will.

Personally I am no longer interested in this working and already started making moves to rent an apartment. Can't continue with an off and on marriage.

coolcatty:
Oga you have alot of idle time on your hand walahi.....you are fighting a woman for seeexx in this age and time.....its obvious your wife has low

libido.....no problem......why don't you try someone else outside??...............side chics are there for a reason....they are very helpful to the

society and have saved so many marriages from breakdown......studies have shown that men that complain,nag and exhibit domestic violence

tendencies are faithful men that date/marry only one woman...........get a young wild girl...preferably 18-24years...someone that is not even

thinking of marriage now and won't catch love feelings......shower her with gifts and money and she will make you happy..heck she will even

invite her friends for more romps if you treat her well......that way you will ignore and overlook your wife's wahala...............just make sure

you still provide for your family.....cheating is not that bad if its the only way to save your marriage....afterall God hates divorce and David cheated.

Cuties1:
I see how bad of a wife I have been to my husband all this while. My perfect husband, weldonsir!!

Cuties1:
I see how bad of a wife I have been to my husband all this while. My perfect husband, weldonsir!!

baby124:
I don't see it that way. But if you feel that is the best action for you, then it's your choice. But have patience. That is my advice. Also try to reduce the people that live with you. You have kids now, be careful.

NoToPile:
Cuties1 and adviserseeker you guys should go and sort this your matter.

Bros you really want to go rent an apartment and move out on top this matter? to be honest this is just a very minute challenge and you guys want your marriage to crack because of this. So what will happen when real challenges show

Both of you need to drop your ego and do what needs to be done and sort this out.

How difficult is it for a married couple to talk and sort things out without interference from outsiders.

And I also think theres too much crowd in your home your sisters, her siblings let everybody go to their own houses, get a help that lives outside your home.

I will also say bros and wife. should be patient ooo.


Divorce le ngbe sere yi. It is that easy?

adviserseeker:
Thanks. If you read my reply to baby124 then you will understand better my stance. No backing out this time.

Cuties1:
I see how bad of a wife I have been to my husband all this while. My perfect husband, weldonsir!!

adviserseeker:
Do you apologise to your husband when you do something that he finds offensive or call his bluff until he comes down to practically beg you to say sorry for something that everyone knows is wrong?

My wife until things got very messy 3 months ago will never ever apologise. No matter what the offense is. She is apparently too big to apologise to a mere nobody like me.

When you and your husband make a decision, have an agreement on something, when you change your mind ( maybe after thinking about it again ) do you insist to have it your way or no other way?

If you are a full house wife ( at least temporarily ) do you ensure your husband's breakfast is ready on time? And importantly assuming someone calls your husband and you answer the call simply because you were expecting a call on his phone as you had dashed out your own phone a while before, then the said person calls out your husbands name, then when you say it is his wife, SHE hangs up. And in a bid to be sure it is not your call, you check on trucaller and the register on your PRIVATE phone to be sure it is not someone you know. You find out that the said person went to same school with your husband and your husband and her had talked on two different occasion ( 31 and 40 seconds ) based on the call history on his phone and they not only talked two times, there were couple of missed calls as well and then when he wakes up he denies knowing the person.

You know, it is okay if he says this woman has called me before and I explained to her it is a wrong number but he POINT BLANKLY said he has not spoken to the said woman before. Whereas he himself can see he has spoken to the woman two times then tries to say maybe your baby mistakenly pressed the phone and answered...for 31 and 40 seconds and couple of missed calls and they went to the same university.

Cos you kept asking him questions because you OBVIOUSLY felt he was lying he asks you to do whatever you want simply because he has told you he doesn't know her ( someone who he actually talked with on two different occasions ). Then you send a text to the woman who happened to be married that you do not know what she and your husband are doing but if it is something bad, nemesis will catch up.

Should that woman reply THREE DAYS LATER ( THREE FREAKING DAYS LATER ) with abusive words and your audacity who happens to see the message first then show it to you. Something that you guys have forgotten the same day, not more than 4 hours after and were perfectly fine together again with no one even remembering it was reawakened THREE, YES, THREE later, TROIS JOUR as French will say, how exactly will you feel? Disrespected, abused right? Disgusted, cheated, dishonoured, treated as piece of shiit, treated like a nobody? Yeah Exactly how I felt. It was the straw that broke the camel's back for me especially considering a similar thing had happened several months earlier for which I reacted in dismay as would anyone and she was telling her friend " I have explained to him, it is his business if he wants to accept it or not". Respectful right?

This and many others that I can't bring up here is exactly why I feel she sees me as a piece of shiit that can be disrespected at will and when he reacts, she resorts to blackmail - like the cheap "my perfect husband welldone sir" nonsense up there.

baby124:
Sorry about all that, but you must learn to forgive and let things go. She is young o, she will continue to aggravate you so inu e o Lati jin gan ni. You guys are different people with different upbringing coming together. So you both have to find how to make it work. You also have to be willing to forgive a lot and so does she. She is not mature yet, but she will get there. Don't let anyone deceive you that their marriage is perfect, neither should you take advise to cheat on your wife. Work through your problems and it may take time but you will be proud you did. You have to act like the mature one since she is immature still. Sorry about your experience but it will pass. There is no woman or man that you will come across that won't have their own wahala and that is the honest truth. Get an older and responsible man to mentor you and you will see that marriage comes with its challenges.

adviserseeker:
When things were getting out of hand and I felt she was being too rude to my folks, I advised that we get a counsellor the reply was " I will change" and you saying she should apologise, she has. Honestly she has. But when you do something, apologise then do the same thing again and again?

She was right, she was certainly not ready for marriage the annoying thing is that she knows this and then went ahead only to make my life miserable.

Cuties1:
I see how bad of a wife I have been to my husband all this while. My perfect husband, weldonsir!!

Cuties1:
Yes!! I am the wife, u all are talking about. I accept that I have wronged my husband, I accept that I make things go out of proportion before I rectify it but my husband won't accept my apology, he is tired of me apologising over and over again. I want u all commentators to pls help me plead to him on my behalf. Thanks.

Cuties1:
Yes!! I am the wife, u all are talking about. I accept that I have wronged my husband, I accept that I make things go out of proportion before I rectify it but my husband won't accept my apology, he is tired of me apologising over and over again. I want u all commentators to pls help me plead to him on my behalf. Thanks.

Cuties1:
Yes!! I am the wife, u all are talking about. I accept that I have wronged my husband, I accept that I make things go out of proportion before I rectify it but my husband won't accept my apology, he is tired of me apologising over and over again. I want u all commentators to pls help me plead to him on my behalf. Thanks.

adviserseeker:
When things were getting out of hand and I felt she was being too rude to my folks, I advised that we get a counsellor the reply was " I will change" and you saying she should apologise, she has. Honestly she has. But when you do something, apologise then do the same thing again and again?

She was right, she was certainly not ready for marriage the annoying thing is that she knows this and then went ahead only to make my life miserable.

Prognose:
Hello bro,
So I read through your threads, Wheeew, long story short, you married a tough woman. The summary of it all is that her behaviour and yours are not at par, you married a woman you cannot control unless you change your ways and from what you have said you are not a harsh husband. So there are two options for you. I'm not mentioning the phone saga as she would not have reacted in that way if you were A HARSH kind of man. From all indications she don see you finish. A strange man calls your wife and she couldn't proffer any decent excuse, rather just waved you off like a fly? Not wanting to annoy you any further but like I said, you have two options.

1. Quietly seek a divorce. This is the easy way out. Tell her firmly that you and her are not compatible and you have decided to give her the freedom she has worked so hard for. there is a way a woman respects a man and I'm sorry to say bro, she hasn't been exhibiting it. She doesn't even want to kiss you talk less of have sex with you? Men need love too. Set her free and settle how to take care of your kids. They didn't raise her up well on how to take care of a man.

2. Change your ways. Take your marriage as a do-or-die affair. Realise your honour is at stake. Withdraw all comforts from her when she misbehaves and tell her she will not get those comforts back unless she complies. All men desire sex, sex is important and shouldn't be begged for, especially in marriage. Even if she is not in the mood she can give it to you out of the love she has for you, there is a reason the bible tells the wife not to withhold herself from her husband. She should give you the sex it is not as if you are asking for her kidney. Also when she does not do what you want like preparing your breakfast, refuse to eat until she does so, Don't let her out of the kitchen and you yourself don't leave the house.Put your foot down and see whether heaven will fall. both of you will starve there and not go out until something gives. Authority has to be shown. If she hates you so much why hasn't she sought for a divorce herself? Someone on the other thread said you are just a giver to her and it seems to be true. One baby being taken care of by a sister, a brother (and a nanny) at one time? And she still doesn't have time for you? Reporting to her parents and they don't at least reply your message? You are the one doing them a favour bro, open your eyes and see it. If you want your marriage to work then become harsh and mould her until she decides to run or she changes to suit you.

ColonelDrake:
I endorse this message!

@topic,

I hate reading posts from sissies. adviserseeker, you simply do not have balls. Jeez! No woman, I repeat no lady on earth can fck with me. How da hell would she refuse to kiss you, touch you and even have sex with you. And yet, you are crying and whining like a cry baby. Baba, ignore her totally.. Don't ask for it again.Find a side chick, spend on her and bang her with reckless abandon. Is it that hard to find a side chick? Stop, romancing her ago. You are fueling it by behaving like a sissy.

I have never asked for sex more than once from my wife. You say no with no cogent reason, I will just keep mum and go sort myself out. I nor get time at all. If you say no, I expect you will make up for it some other time, but if you don't, I won't bother at all. Me no get chill oo..I won't even hit or slap you..Nah, it's not in my nature to beat a woman. There are so many ways I discipline my wife without touching her.

Op, you are well-to-do, go and find a side-chick. In fact, rub it in her face and don't ask her for anything again....If she wants to form tough, op, tell her to bring it on and be your guest! What nonsense!

Prognose:
Hello bro,
So I read through your threads, Wheeew, long story short, you married a tough woman. The summary of it all is that her behaviour and yours are not at par, you married a woman you cannot control unless you change your ways and from what you have said you are not a harsh husband. So there are two options for you. I'm not mentioning the phone saga as she would not have reacted in that way if you were A HARSH kind of man. From all indications she don see you finish. A strange man calls your wife and she couldn't proffer any decent excuse, rather just waved you off like a fly? Not wanting to annoy you any further but like I said, you have two options.

1. Quietly seek a divorce. This is the easy way out. Tell her firmly that you and her are not compatible and you have decided to give her the freedom she has worked so hard for. there is a way a woman respects a man and I'm sorry to say bro, she hasn't been exhibiting it. She doesn't even want to kiss you talk less of have sex with you? Men need love too. Set her free and settle how to take care of your kids. They didn't raise her up well on how to take care of a man.

2. Change your ways. Take your marriage as a do-or-die affair. Realise your honour is at stake. Withdraw all comforts from her when she misbehaves and tell her she will not get those comforts back unless she complies. All men desire sex, sex is important and shouldn't be begged for, especially in marriage. Even if she is not in the mood she can give it to you out of the love she has for you, there is a reason the bible tells the wife not to withhold herself from her husband. She should give you the sex it is not as if you are asking for her kidney. Also when she does not do what you want like preparing your breakfast, refuse to eat until she does so, Don't let her out of the kitchen and you yourself don't leave the house.Put your foot down and see whether heaven will fall. both of you will starve there and not go out until something gives. Authority has to be shown. If she hates you so much why hasn't she sought for a divorce herself? Someone on the other thread said you are just a giver to her and it seems to be true. One baby being taken care of by a sister, a brother (and a nanny) at one time? And she still doesn't have time for you? Reporting to her parents and they don't at least reply your message? You are the one doing them a favour bro, open your eyes and see it. If you want your marriage to work then become harsh and mould her until she decides to run or she changes to suit you.

Cuties1:
Lol see a sissy calling another sissy. I see how despirate u are to brag with the little ego u have left cos all has been smashed by madam at home. Lady/boy u better go and settle ur own wahala and leave here with your unfaithful face. Go kneel down like u always do. Mu multiply by 2.

adviserseeker:
This will never happen. I have a daughter and I know whatever I do will affect her future.

My wife has behaved the way a marry woman shouldn't behave and I will be honest, I have contemplated it two times but can't bring myself to it.

My daughter an her future is more important to me especially considering how evil ladies out there can be.

If you know me and my background and what I have gone through, you will understand my stance. And I am far from being a sissy. My family/wife only happen to be my weak point.

lrguru:
Sorry to say this, but Op you are the woman in the house. Begging your wife for sex is the lamest thing any man can do. Fuckkk your wife anywhere man, cos u paid for it. If she refuses, let her be and start talking with some new people especially ladies online. Meet with some and with time u won't be asking her for sx again cos u will be getting it elsewhere. When she realises u no longer asks her for sex, her brain go reset, but if she doesn't change too, continue till u won't even want to have sex with her again, and if possible leave her alone with her misery and spend time outside. Else my guy u will be so frustrated and get HBP. Forget all this women claiming that you are asking for too much sex as if you are not married. Sex everyday is not a crime. Guy enjoy your life and leave happy always and don't let anybody feed u with crap cos u are the man of the house, and not all the time u come online to tell people your problem, cos alot of them here knows nothing. Guy reason.

Tritri:
@Adviserseeker ...

I consider you as ..



Woman Wrapper .

Your wife knows you only TALK but CANT do S. H .I .T

Wealthy/Rich Men dont have Problems Fucking pussy ..In-short getting pussy is the easiest thing for any rich guy...Either wife or GF or Street girls. None of our Business.

Stop Sounding like someone who didn't attend Uni or even Poly.You talk like the last born of your family .

Your wife will one day poison/kill you and claim your properties/biz before you marry new wife Because she seems smart dan you.

Accept that you're Daft.

Sorry for the Insult but you deserve it.

ade712:
@op

You are too soft for women!!!

Firstly, you need to read a lot about WOMEN. Download e books on how to be an alpha male. Authors like David Deangelo, Robert Green and likes will help you to understand women and POWER a bit.

Again, Niccolo Machiavelli in his book "The Prince" has advised that " to be feared is better than to be loved". He further stressed that what a PRINCE should avoid is to be Hated. You need to read that book to know the consequences of love, fear and hate!

It appears that your wife has unquantified hatred and disregard for you! It is very dangerous for you as a person since you are leaving under the same roof.

If you can afford it, move out.

Be a man and husband. Use punishments, withdrawal of privileges and strong body language to get what you want.

Discard all societal moral standards that is not in your best interest.

Stop Ranting...

A word is enough for the wise!