15 Serious Issues You Must Expect In The First Five Years Of Your Marriage - Family

15 Serious Issues You Must Expect In The First Five Years Of Your Marriage - Family - Nairaland

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15 Serious Issues You Must Expect In The First Five Years Of Your Marriage by Familyfirst(op): 11:08am On Jun 06, 2017

15 SERIOUS ISSUES YOU MUST EXPECT IN THE FIRST FIVE YEARS OF YOUR MARRIAGE

Many marriages crash before the end the third year of the marriage. Marriage expert said the first three years are the most difficult years for most marriages. This is so because nobody informed the intending couples what to expect in the first three years of their marital lives, so they drive without a road map, they sail without a compass.

Here I will expose thou to what you need to know about the first three years of your marriage and how to manage them.

1) SURPRISE, SURPRISE
Expect a lot of surprises especially in the first year of marriage, you think you know the guy or the “babe” you want to marry like the palm of your hands, sorry you do not really know him or her more than names, be ready for shocks as the reality will dawn on you. Expect snoring, sleep walking, talking in sleep, gnashing of teeth in sleep, acrobatics movement in bed as he or she sleeps. The truth is, you are going to live with somebody totally different from the person you marry

2) DECISION MAKING
Your decision is no more entirely yours, prepare to allow somebody query you, if you are not used to that before now it is better you begin to learn that you are about to lose your right to take a decision that affects you alone.

3) LEAVING ISSUES
The Bible Commanded you to leave but your family will resist that.Many will still come to poke their nose, Uncles will still command you like before, parents will still treat you like their boy. Begin to leave gradually now, don’t wait until you get marry, disconnect gradually. Leave financially. Stop collecting money from them, leave physically by getting your own house, yes start leaving now, let them get used to it lest they say your wife took you away from them.

4) CLEAVING ISSUES
You will also confront issues of “cleaving”,
you will have a wife waiting for you at home when you arrive home tired by 11 pm to talk about “serious issue” which may end up been that “trivial” issue like why you must get a maid for her. There will be no more privacy or private time for you, you will now have to share everything including your time, bed, body, unclothedness and even your life with somebody, sorry, that is what is known as “cleaving”

5) ADJUSTMENT ISSUES
You like Fan and AC in the room and she hates it with passion, you want light in the room but he wants total darkness, he loves pepper you hate it, she loud music, you want very quiet environment. welcome to your surprise life of marriage. Prepare your mind for this and be ready to adjust, failure to adjust is the major reason why marriage fails in the first three years of “yes I do.”

6) PREGNANCY AND DELIVERIES ISSUES
Nausea, morning sickness, prenatal classes, postnatal clinic and lots more may come with pregnancy, don’t be surprised about this, prepare yourself for it.

7) SEX DURING PREGNANCY
This another serious issue among newlywed.Most people think sex must not take place once the woman is pregnant. Spiritually nothing is wrong about it, Medically Doctors told us nothing is wrong about it even to the week of delivery except otherwise stated by your health caregivers.

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BABY MATERIALS
Buying of baby clothing,shoes,baby cot,bath,wipes,diapers,changing pad or table,feeding bottles,toys,baby carrier,baby car seat,Stroller,baby spoons,Bibs,bowls,bottle brushes,breast pump,breast pad,baby cups,baby spoons,swaddling blankets,bouncing seat,pacifiers,play Mat. The list is endless, but almost all are needed especially for the first Child they all means money no wonder somebody said “baby is expensive but make love and make babies”

9) RESUMPTION OF SEX AFTER DELIVERY
The issue of when to resume sex after the birth of the first Child can also be an issue, please discuss this extensively with your Doctor During postnatal Clinic.

10) FAMILY PLANNING METHOD TO BE ADOPTED
Discuss family planning methods with your Doctor during Prenatal classes, avoid contraceptives with many side effects as it might affect your health in future.

11) RESUMPTION AT WORK AFTER MATERNITY LEAVE
The dilemma of where to put your baby after three months of maternity leave will stare you in the face as soon as you are into two months of your maternity Leave. Should we get a Nanny? can we afford to pay?, should we go and bring grandma,? is she not too old to take care of modern Baby? Should the Child be taking to a Creche? but we have bad stories about Creche, Should we get a maid, but what about all the problems maids are known for?. Begin to prepare now discuss with your intending partner, ask Questions from married people around and pray about it.

12) CRÈCHE
If the Child is to be taking to a Crèche, which one? This is another decision that will need to be made, make it prayerfully, ask questions from mature parents, visit the crèche before you make a decision.

13) NURSERY SCHOOL
This also applies to choosing of Nursery and Primary School for your Child, pray, ask questions, visit many schools compare their services, opening, and closing etc.

15) SCHOOL RUNS
Taking the Child to school and bringing him home is another issue that will face the parent as school resumes, put this into consideration as you choose a school for your Children.

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