This is not a thread to discourage people from joining dating groups or paying for hook ups but this is a thread to open the eyes of niaraland sisters who might a mixture of naive and desperate to settle down cos this is the category of ladies these guys are out in the prowl for.


To you a lady ,you might think you are joining a group that has "ready to settle down guys" unknown to you that you just entered a mouse trap. Now dating groups are becoming more popular on nairaland but anything that has its advantage obviously has a disavantage and it seem these groups have become a perfect place ground for players to get "easy lay". These guys are not jeveniles infact they are well over their thirties so you as lady will think,oh well he is sure ready to settle down cos "he is of age" ,but that is where you are wrong.

If you are joining a group, never keep any relationship with anyone a secret,especially the admin. You see as the admin ,it is easy for him to convince you not to let anyone know about it, but ask yourself,why will the admin know about others and not want others to know about you and him?

Ladies please and please stop indulging in "lets see who it goes " . If you are in a group, it means you have made up your mind to settle down ,that "lets see how it goes "should have been skipped, why would he still need to consult his ancestors to see how it goes.Take note ladies some of this so called "serious relationships " can last up to a year before he pulls the plug and the next guy in the group comes to show interest.

I know the next question will be "how do i know this?" Well ,i just recently watched it go down in a group and i think ladies need to be aware .


pocohantas , Guest007, dominque

I get it now...

pocohantas:


If that is the case, then I blame the ladies. One strange guy calls you and you just flow? Especially when it is linked to a forum like NL? Hian!!

you are not getting me. There are dating sites out there dating groups are just a mini version of those dating sites. So its not like its some random guy in the real sense.

Why do you think such happens?

Duggedised12:
you are not getting me

Babe, I am not o.

Let me explain what I am understanding. They join groups and the group admin starts linking them to "random guys"? These guys might also share same girls contacts to other guys too.

So, they both take it up from there.

My point is, if they have met one from the group and it failed. Why meet another person from that group again?

pocohantas:


Babe, I am not o.

Let me explain what I am understanding. They join groups, them the group admin starts linking them to "random guys"? These guys might also share same girls contacts to other guys too.

So, they both take it up from there.

My point is, if they have met one from same group and it failed. Why meet another person from that group again?

To be fair some of these groups have actually successfully hooked up people that led to marriage. Now as a lady you won't see a relationship that lasted up to a year as a trap ,you would probably see it as one of those things and want to try again ,that is the thing. Its a perfect plan that these ladies dont suspect anything.

Duggedised12:
To be fair some of these groups have actually successfully hooked up people that led to marriage. Now as a lady you won't see a relationship that lasted up to a year as a trap ,you would probably see it as one of those things and want to try again ,that is the thing. Its a perfect plan that these ladies dont suspect anything.

Anywhere men are gathered, evil dwells in their midst. Be very paranoid and suspicious

BLUNTD:
Well! It's complicated some how.
One, not every courtship must lead to marriage. Hence, that it's a dating group doesn't mean when he says hello, marriage is the next thing. What if after discovering the lady's true character and he no option than to pull the plug.
So it's not a straight forward event. I always suspect it's because sex must have been involved which brings up a question of why do women feel only the guys benefits from the sexual aspect, like they are doing them a favor or something.
If a lady can have an open mind and sees sex as a mutually enjoyed encounter, the way relationships are viewed will change.
Once sex isn't involved even if there was a lot of emotional energy spent, the ladies feel ok and are able to move on easily, the reverse is the case if there was sex involved.
So guys be direct and honest in such a group and the ladies, not every hi will lead to marriage. Be yourself, what will be will be. Enjoy the relationship too and once you have gotten a partner to be within the group it should be made public.

If you are in a group that says "ready for marriage" i believe you must have finished consulting your ancestors if you should settle down or not ,i also believe at that stage you should know what you want in the woman you hope to settle down with, know your dead breakers and so on.But you see this is why i opened this thread cos many ladies are naive not to know this.These guys go as far as coming to meet your people ,yes you heard me.Might sound shocking but its the truth, these guys take it that serious.

pocohantas:


Anywhere men are gathered, evil dwells in their midst. Be very paranoid and suspicious

my sister,nor be small thing o

BLUNTD:


What level of jobless will make a guy keep a girl he has no interest to marry for over a year and then breaks up the relationship for no good reason. If he was after her body and has gotten it ,he wouldn't stay 6 months

you should rather ask what level of wickedness . I think there is an award for the most ruthless player in the game or something

Duggedised12:
If you are in a group that says "ready for marriage" i believe you must have finished consulting your ancestors if you should settle down or not ,i also believe at that stage you should know what you want in the woman you hope to settle down with, know your dead breakers and so on.But you see this is why i opened this thread cos many ladies are naive not to know this.These guys go as far as coming to meet your people ,yes you heard me.Might sound shocking but its the truth, these guys take it that serious.

Easy, don't give a dog a bad name just to hang it.
Women are known to pretend and conceal their bad sides. So if they guy happens to find out at any stage then it's not bad to abort mission.
I have only seen case where a guy did the going to see her parents thing just to sleep with the girl. So my stand still remains, in a sexual relationship this can't be the case. Hear both side of the story.

BLUNTD:


Easy, don't give a dog a bad name just to hang it.
Women are known to pretend and conceal their bad sides. So if they guy happens to find out at any stage then it's not bad to abort mission.
I have only seen case where a guy did the going to see her parents thing just to sleep with the girl. So my stand still remains, in a sexual relationship this can't be the case. Hear both side of the story.

This is not a case of giving a dog a bad name but to let ladies shine their eyes, there are guys out there creating groups on nairaland to have access to a pool of ladies to warm their beds, they know these ladies are desperate to settle down so they have perfect victims to prowl on. I could careless if they have their own sides of the story or not ,i am saying what i know. Many of these ladies have been licking their wounds in secret so many other ladies are not aware and also fall victims and the circle continues.

I didn't create this thread to go back and forth with you, i created it to bring awareness of what is going on behind closed door that these ladies are either not aware of or are too ashamed to talk about cos they know they have been used.

To what end these guys do this ,i cant say and i am in no position to say but to say its not true or try to imply that i am lying or exaggerating or try to water down the seriousness of this issue is what i will not take from you.

Duggedised12:
you are not getting me. There are dating sites out there dating groups are just a mini version of those dating sites. So its not like its some random guy in the real sense.

Shouldn't this be a two way warning? I don't see the need to demonize guys as the time wasters or unserious players. A dating group is like a mini social app itself. Na anything your eye see, you take am like that.
Of course a smart person should look before he/she chooses to hook up with anyone there. And I am not defending guys who still play around.

Omoluabi16:

Shouldn't this be a two way warning? I don't see the need to demonize guys as the time wasters or unserious players. A dating group is like a mini social app itself. Na anything your eye see, you take am like that.
Of course a smart person should look before he/she chooses to hook up with anyone there.

Women are more desperate to settle down that men, the category of women that join this groups are continuously hit with the reality that they are in a constant race against their biological clock which makes women more vunerable that men in dating scams. Women are the prefect victims for "come and marry " type of scams which is why these groups are a safe haven these guys,some of these groups have been in existence for years on this forum and till date they still have pool of victims to choose from,hence the reason i am focusing on ladies .

Duggedised12:
Women are more desperate to settle down that men, the category of women that join this groups are continuously hit with the reality that they are in a constant race against their biological clock which makes women more vunerable that men in dating scams. Women are the prefect victims for "come and marry " type of scams which is why these groups are a safe haven these guys,some of these groups have been in existence for years on this forum and till date they still have pool of victims to choose from,hence the reason i am focusing on ladies .

Okay. Point taken.

Duggedised12:
Women are more desperate to settle down that men, the category of women that join this groups are continuously hit with the reality that they are in a constant race against their biological clock which makes women more vunerable that men in dating scams. Women are the prefect victims for "come and marry " type of scams which is why these groups are a safe haven these guys,some of these groups have been in existence for years on this forum and till date they still have pool of victims to choose from,hence the reason i am focusing on ladies .

This is where those ladies get it twisted. If 50 men join a group that links them to ladies, be rest assured that what 40 (and more) see, is SEX. Never a wife material. Definitely not at first. Maybe with time they might start seeing other qualities...

The only exceptions are guys who do not have a large pool of ladies to choose from in reality. Most times abroad based guys or very introverted or busy men. They are also more discerning, because there is no SEX involved here. No dinner or hangouts. So, they focus on the things that matter and makeup their minds very fast. If you don't meet up, they cut you off.

After all, e no go enter plane from America or UK to come fck toto. When no be say e never fck before. Same can't be said for homebased o...

Forget it, once they gather in groups, na random lay them dey find. Same applies to NL in general...

Sorry for disturbing the thread!
Take no offence.

Duggedised12:
This is not a case of giving a dog a bad name but to let ladies shine their eyes, there are guys out there creating groups on nairaland to have access to a pool of ladies to warm their beds, they know these ladies are desperate to settle down so they have perfect victims to prowl on. I could careless if they have their own sides of the story or not ,i am saying what i know. Many of these ladies have been licking their wounds in secret so many other ladies are not aware and also fall victims and the circle continues.

I didn't create this thread to go back and forth with you, i created it to being awareness of what is going on behind closed door that these ladies are either not aware of or are too ashamed to talk about cos they know they have been used.

To what end these guys do this ,i cant say and i am in no position to say but to say its not true or try to imply that i am lying or exaggerating or try to water down the seriousness of this issue is what i will not take from you.

pocohantas:


This is where those ladies get it twisted. If 50 men join a group that links them to ladies, be rest assured that what 40 (and more) see, is SEX. Never a wife material. Definitely not at first. Maybe with time they might start seeing other qualities...

The only exceptions are guys who do not have a large pool of ladies to choose from in reality. Most times abroad based guys or very introverted or busy men. They are also more discerning, because there is no SEX involved here. No dinner or hangouts. So, they focus on the things that matter and makeup their minds very fast. If you don't meet up, they cut you off.

After all, e no go enter plane from America or UK to come fck toto. When no be say e never fck before. Same can't be said for homebased o...

Forget it, once they gather in groups, na random lay them dey find. Same applies to NL in general...

I hope these women learn after all that was the purpose of the thread,any of them are licking their wounds in silence XP of shame, this "come and marry scam" is now spreading like wildfire and many woman have been victims by den nor grin talk make other women take learn.shm

BLUNTD:
Sorry for disturbing the thread!
Take no offence.

none taken.

Again

OK.

pocohantas:


This is where those ladies get it twisted. If 50 men join a group that links them to ladies, be rest assured that what 40 (and more) see, is SEX. Never a wife material. Definitely not at first. Maybe with time they might start seeing other qualities...

The only exceptions are guys who do not have a large pool of ladies to choose from in reality. Most times abroad based guys or very introverted or busy men. They are also more discerning, because there is no SEX involved here. No dinner or hangouts. So, they focus on the things that matter and makeup their minds very fast. If you don't meet up, they cut you off.

After all, e no go enter plane from America or UK to come fck toto. When no be say e never fck before. Same can't be said for homebased o...

Forget it, once they gather in groups, na random lay them dey find. Same applies to NL in general...

Despite The Fact That I Am A Man,I Saw Some Senses In This Write Up....

You are right in a way but not all guys on this dating groups are looking for sex mate. some joined to seek a relationship that will lead to marriage, they feel they will meet a serious and committed lady there. what you are saying here is a two way thing, some ladies are on the dating groups to exploit serious guys too. they pretend to need a serious relationship but in the end its all a lie. so in my opinion I feel both parties should be warned.