₦airaland Forum

1

H0711:
I was staying in d village wiv my parents and younger broda, my first broda is married with kids and my elder sister is also married with kids so it was only four of us at home. I was working in a saloon I am a hairdresser , make up artist and was saving money to go back to school because my parents couldn’t afford to pay my fees . I was so happy in d village then 3 years ago my broda lost his wife in Abuja a month after giving birth to d 3rd child , after d burial d children came to stay in d village wiv us , my mum and I use to take care of them , they started school and my broda use to send feeding money every month and he paid all school fees for the whole year then d following yr Xmas he said he want the children to go back to Abuja because he is not happy wiv d school system in d village but that wasn’t true because d school which they had attended it is one of the best private school in our village , my parents agreed to let them go but I was angry when my mum say I should go wiv them to take care of them ., I refuse because my broda is very stingy person he is making money but his own parents have never benefited from him, my mum is selling food in the market people in d village mocked her that she have a rich son but she is still living in poverty just because my broda doesn’t care about us. I told her I wasn’t going anywhere because I will suffer there but my mum begged me for d sake of children and she said my broda promised to send me to school in Abuja I told her it was a lie but she insists he will do it which I agreed but I wasn’t happy only did it for my mum because I love her a lot . D day I left d village I cried like never before because I knew I will suffer in my broda house and it has been 1 years 10 months in Abuja and my life is worse than hell. My bro doesn’t care about me , for 2 years I haven’t bought any new clothes still wearing my old clothes I came with , he doesn’t give me any money for my toiletries, he doesn’t want me to work , all I do is to take care of d children , cook , drop and pick kids to school , clean d house nothing else . My cream has finished since June and i have been using johnson baby lotion d cream d children use and I have been having rashes and acne because d cream doesn’t agree with my skin and have asked him for numerous times for d money but he keep telling me he doesn’t and want me to wait till he get d money and I ave been hearing d same song over and over. He doesn’t drop any money to me he gives d money to his secretary she is buys whatever we needs in d house and I think they are sleeping together too because she is d one managing d housekeeping and I don’t get a kobo , I am like a maid here I am suffering a lot .Anytime I complains about him to my mum she keep telling me to pray and endure I feel like she doesn’t care about me and want me to still suffering for d sake of d kids but I am tired and have stop complaining to her. I reported him to his best friends and business partner he promised to talk to my brother and he gave me 20k to buy my stuffs and promised to give me more but he has started talking dirty to me and asking to sleep wiv me and I warned him to never talk dirty to me again or else I will report to his wife so he blocked me , I am tired of everything in this house and we are travelling to d village this December I am planning not to return back to Abuja if my parents forced me , I will drink sniper and end everything , I rather go back to the village and continue with my job and helping my parents than wasting my time here for nothing , I asked him to buy me a good camera so I can start YouTube channel with make up tutorials but he refused , I have already opened d YouTube account but I don’t have any videos yet because I don’t have a good camera. Please advise me what should you do if you were in my shoes please I am waiting for your advice

My dear sister, you are just being used by the entire family to build your little cousins and your own career is in hold till only God knows when

As you are preparing for Christmas, make sure you pack all your belongings and play along you don't need to explain anything when you get home

Once it's time for them to come back to Abuja, seat your family down and let them know that time is going and you ha e not achieved any for the past two years

That you will like to stay behind to sort yourself out

You don't need to present it harshly or in an embarrassing manner, just simple polite manners

And once you say that stand on your feet and don't move your ground

If your mother wants to go with them, she is very free to do so

You have to plan for yourself and your life because you are not a priority to your brother

Worst case he won't send money to you that alone will prepare you to struggle and face your life

u wanna commit suicide because of that, don't u have friends in Abuja that can help u get a job?

frozen70:
My dear sister, you are just being used by the entire family to build your little cousins and your own career is in hold till only God knows when

As you are preparing for Christmas, make sure you pack all your belongings and play along you don't need to explain anything when you get home

Once it's time for them to come back to Abuja, seat your family down and let them know that time is going and you ha e not achieved any for the past two years

That you will like to stay behind to sort yourself out

You don't need to present it harshly or in an embarrassing manner, just simple polite manners

And once you say that stand on your feet and don't move your ground

If your mother wants to go with them, she is very free to do so

You have to plan for yourself and your life because you are not a priority to your brother

Worst case he won't send money to you that alone will prepare you to struggle and face your life

Thanks 4 d advice , this what I am planning to do when we get to d village

Organsmuggler:
u wanna commit suicide because of that, don't u have friends in Abuja that can help u get a job?

I don’t have any friends because I don’t even go out my life is like in prison , I will rather go back to d village and continue with my work because my boss is happy to have me back

H0711:
Thanks 4 d advice , this what I am planning to do when we get to d village

God will see you through

frozen70:
God will see you through

Amen thanks sis

H0711:
I don’t have any friends because I don’t even go out my life is like in prison , I will rather go back to d village and continue with my work because my boss is happy to have me back

ur mom will persuade you to go back with your uncle and if u don't she won't like it, it's better u leave the village maybe go somewhere they can't find u, try making friends

Hmm.. I'm really touched by this.

You know what? When you get to the villa this Dec. Don't follow him back to Lagos even if your parents persuade you, don't go and don't drink snipper or else your beautiful dream of becoming a YouTuber will not come to pass and I won't be happy because I look forward to seeing your videos..
Just stay back if you feel it more convenient for you and actualise your dreams.

Dont forget to hint your parents about his sexcapades with his secretary. Maybe he would be advised to wife her as he's due for a wife. You're not his wife and will never be. Let him marry already.

This one is simple ... Go back to the village nah

Nne, dem point you gun?
You no get legs?
Why would you sacrifice your life and career to raise another person's kid?

H0711:
Thanks 4 d advice , this what I am planning to do when we get to d village

Follow that advice. Please don't yield to any eulogies manipulation. You have your life ahead of you, don't waste time building someone else's while you're suffer. If push gets to shove, remind them of his promises lady year and how in his wickedness he kept your life on a stand still for two years.

CalliDora1:
Hmm.. I'm really touched by this.

You know what? When you get to the villa this Dec. Don't follow him back to Lagos even if your parents persuade you, don't go and don't drink snipper or else your beautiful dream of becoming a YouTuber will not come to pass and I won't be happy because I look forward to seeing your videos..
Just stay back if you feel it more convenient for you and actualise your dreams.

Dont forget to hint your parents about his sexcapades with his secretary. Maybe he would be advised to wife her as he's due for a wife. You're not his wife and will never be. Let him marry already.

Thanks , I can’t wait for December to come so I can go back home I am writing this with tears because I hate my life right now , I wish I never listened to my mum in d first place. Ave already told her about him and d secretary all she could say was my brother is trusting her with d money because she is older than me and she knows how to manage a home but I am too young to do it, she said I should respect her the same way I respect my brother. I just can’t wait to go back

GboyegaD:
Follow that advice. Please don't yield to any eulogies manipulation. You have your life ahead of you, don't waste time building someone else's while you're suffer. If push gets to shove, remind them of his promises lady year and how in his wickedness he kept your life on a stand still for two years.

Thanks I will

H0711:
Thanks , I can’t wait for December to come so I can go back home I am writing this with tears because I hate my life right now , I wish I never listened to my mum in d first place. Ave already told her about him and d secretary all she could say was my brother is trusting her with d money because she is older than me and she knows how to manage a home but I am too young to do it, she said I should respect her the same way I respect my brother. I just can’t wait to go back

You're welcome.

Just calm down. No need hating on yourself.

May God grant you your wish, dear.

CalliDora1:
You're welcome.

Just calm down. No need hating on yourself.

May God grant you your wish, dear.

Amen thanks sis

This goes to show that our lovely parents and elders can misguide us.

Where is CAPSLOCKED?

H0711:
Thanks 4 d advice , this what I am planning to do when we get to d village

Please stick to this advice she has said everything I wanted to type.
I have a childhood friend that experienced exactly same thing when we tried to pull her out her OWN mother was the barrier and she refused to stand up to them so we left her to her fate.
To cut the long story short she later developed sever mental issues if not for God and her innocence....
So please stand up to your family and do the needful.

iamloyalty:
Please stick to this advice she has said everything I wanted to type.
I have a childhood friend that experienced exactly same thing when we tried to pull her out her OWN mother was the barrier and she refused to stand up to them so we left her to her fate.
To cut the long story short she later developed sever mental issues if not for God and her innocence....
So please stand up to your family and do the needful.

Thanks , I think am already suffering from depression I have to get out of here as fast as possible before it get worse and I will not allow anyone including my own parents to stop me

H0711:
I was staying in d village wiv my parents and younger broda, my first broda is married with kids and my elder sister is also married with kids so it was only four of us at home. I was working in a saloon I am a hairdresser , make up artist and was saving money to go back to school because my parents couldn’t afford to pay my fees . I was so happy in d village then 3 years ago my broda lost his wife in Abuja a month after giving birth to d 3rd child , after d burial d children came to stay in d village wiv us , my mum and I use to take care of them , they started school and my broda use to send feeding money every month and he paid all school fees for the whole year then d following yr Xmas he said he want the children to go back to Abuja because he is not happy wiv d school system in d village but that wasn’t true because d school which they had attended it is one of the best private school in our village , my parents agreed to let them go but I was angry when my mum say I should go wiv them to take care of them ., I refuse because my broda is very stingy person he is making money but his own parents have never benefited from him, my mum is selling food in the market people in d village mocked her that she have a rich son but she is still living in poverty just because my broda doesn’t care about us. I told her I wasn’t going anywhere because I will suffer there but my mum begged me for d sake of children and she said my broda promised to send me to school in Abuja I told her it was a lie but she insists he will do it which I agreed but I wasn’t happy only did it for my mum because I love her a lot . D day I left d village I cried like never before because I knew I will suffer in my broda house and it has been 1 years 10 months in Abuja and my life is worse than hell. My bro doesn’t care about me , for 2 years I haven’t bought any new clothes still wearing my old clothes I came with , he doesn’t give me any money for my toiletries, he doesn’t want me to work , all I do is to take care of d children , cook , drop and pick kids to school , clean d house nothing else . My cream has finished since June and i have been using johnson baby lotion d cream d children use and I have been having rashes and acne because d cream doesn’t agree with my skin and have asked him for numerous times for d money but he keep telling me he doesn’t and want me to wait till he get d money and I ave been hearing d same song over and over. He doesn’t drop any money to me he gives d money to his secretary she is buys whatever we needs in d house and I think they are sleeping together too because she is d one managing d housekeeping and I don’t get a kobo , I am like a maid here I am suffering a lot .Anytime I complains about him to my mum she keep telling me to pray and endure I feel like she doesn’t care about me and want me to still suffering for d sake of d kids but I am tired and have stop complaining to her. I reported him to his best friends and business partner he promised to talk to my brother and he gave me 20k to buy my stuffs and promised to give me more but he has started talking dirty to me and asking to sleep wiv me and I warned him to never talk dirty to me again or else I will report to his wife so he blocked me , I am tired of everything in this house and we are travelling to d village this December I am planning not to return back to Abuja if my parents forced me , I will drink sniper and end everything , I rather go back to the village and continue with my job and helping my parents than wasting my time here for nothing , I asked him to buy me a good camera so I can start YouTube channel with make up tutorials but he refused , I have already opened d YouTube account but I don’t have any videos yet because I don’t have a good camera. Please advise me what should you do if you were in my shoes please I am waiting for your advice

When you get to the village do NOT go back to Abuja




If your mother want to force u to go back, tell her that u will either


1. Stay in the village or
2. Commit suicide


Ask her to choose between the 2, I am very sure she will choose number 1 , she will not want her daughter to commit suicide


Note: pls I am not saying u should commit suicide oo, what I am saying is that u should use suicide as a weapon to fight back in order for them to allow you to stay in the village


I repeat, Pls do not commit suicide, u can use suicide to manipulate them to let u stay in thee village but do not commit suicide, hope u understand?



Your brother may likely tell u that he will start given u money directly instead of his secretary, pls do not believe him, it is just a weapon to manipulate u, if u fall for it and later return to Abuja he will start treating u like b4, so even if your brother say he will be given u money if u come back to Abuja, do not believe him, it a lie

H0711:
Thanks , I think am already suffering from depression I have to get out of here as fast as possible before it get worse and I will not allow anyone including my own parents to stop me

Your little nephew(s)/niece (s), how are they coping?
If you feel this way, I can only imagine how they feel.... losing their mum at very tender ages
Are you taking care of them or taking the frustrations out on them?
You're in the best position to give them something close to a motherly love and care, but it is sad you feel the way you feel, especially with your brother not helping matters...
My advice to you would be not to be too desperate about the situation, or else it'll choke and suffocate you.
Calm down and be at ease dear. Breathe.
Have patience. Nwe ndidi, and you'll see that the situation is probably not as bad as see it...
Those babies need you....if only your brother had the wisdom on how to go about the situation
Consider reconsidering your decision for those little babies' sake.... biko nne ehn...jikota umuaka ndi ahu it's a sacrifice.

H0711:
I was staying in d village wiv my parents and younger broda, my first broda is married with kids and my elder sister is also married with kids so it was only four of us at home. I was working in a saloon I am a hairdresser , make up artist and was saving money to go back to school because my parents couldn’t afford to pay my fees . I was so happy in d village then 3 years ago my broda lost his wife in Abuja a month after giving birth to d 3rd child , after d burial d children came to stay in d village wiv us , my mum and I use to take care of them , they started school and my broda use to send feeding money every month and he paid all school fees for the whole year then d following yr Xmas he said he want the children to go back to Abuja because he is not happy wiv d school system in d village but that wasn’t true because d school which they had attended it is one of the best private school in our village , my parents agreed to let them go but I was angry when my mum say I should go wiv them to take care of them ., I refuse because my broda is very stingy person he is making money but his own parents have never benefited from him, my mum is selling food in the market people in d village mocked her that she have a rich son but she is still living in poverty just because my broda doesn’t care about us. I told her I wasn’t going anywhere because I will suffer there but my mum begged me for d sake of children and she said my broda promised to send me to school in Abuja I told her it was a lie but she insists he will do it which I agreed but I wasn’t happy only did it for my mum because I love her a lot . D day I left d village I cried like never before because I knew I will suffer in my broda house and it has been 1 years 10 months in Abuja and my life is worse than hell. My bro doesn’t care about me , for 2 years I haven’t bought any new clothes still wearing my old clothes I came with , he doesn’t give me any money for my toiletries, he doesn’t want me to work , all I do is to take care of d children , cook , drop and pick kids to school , clean d house nothing else . My cream has finished since June and i have been using johnson baby lotion d cream d children use and I have been having rashes and acne because d cream doesn’t agree with my skin and have asked him for numerous times for d money but he keep telling me he doesn’t and want me to wait till he get d money and I ave been hearing d same song over and over. He doesn’t drop any money to me he gives d money to his secretary she is buys whatever we needs in d house and I think they are sleeping together too because she is d one managing d housekeeping and I don’t get a kobo , I am like a maid here I am suffering a lot .Anytime I complains about him to my mum she keep telling me to pray and endure I feel like she doesn’t care about me and want me to still suffering for d sake of d kids but I am tired and have stop complaining to her. I reported him to his best friends and business partner he promised to talk to my brother and he gave me 20k to buy my stuffs and promised to give me more but he has started talking dirty to me and asking to sleep wiv me and I warned him to never talk dirty to me again or else I will report to his wife so he blocked me , I am tired of everything in this house and we are travelling to d village this December I am planning not to return back to Abuja if my parents forced me , I will drink sniper and end everything , I rather go back to the village and continue with my job and helping my parents than wasting my time here for nothing , I asked him to buy me a good camera so I can start YouTube channel with make up tutorials but he refused , I have already opened d YouTube account but I don’t have any videos yet because I don’t have a good camera. Please advise me what should you do if you were in my shoes please I am waiting for your advice

Talk to d secretary

Tony142:
When you get to the village do NOT go back to Abuja




If your mother want to force u to go back, tell her that u will either


1. Stay in the village or
2. Commit suicide


Ask her to choose between the 2, I am very sure she will choose number 1 , she will not want her daughter to commit suicide


Note: pls I am not saying u should commit suicide oo, what I am saying is that u should use suicide as a weapon to fight back in order for them to allow you to stay in the village


I repeat, Pls do not commit suicide, u can use suicide to manipulate them to let u stay in thee village but do not commit suicide, hope u understand?



Your brother may likely tell u that he will start given u money directly instead of his secretary, pls do not believe him, it is just a weapon to manipulate u, if u fall for it and later return to Abuja he will start treating u like b4, so even if your brother say he will be given u money if u come back to Abuja, do not believe him, it a lie

Thanks , even if he promise to start giving me 1 million every month I will not go back with him because I know it’s a lie , he just want to use me like a slave for his children while he doesn’t care about my needs it’s not like he doesn’t have d money but he have money and want me to suffer, I will rather go back and work in d village and earn d little money to support myself and my parents.

stacyadams:
Talk to d secretary

What do you want me to talk to her about ?

mariahAngel:
Your little nephew(s)/niece (s), how are they coping?
If you feel this way, I can only imagine how they feel.... losing their mum at very tender ages
Are you taking care of them or taking the frustrations out on them?
You're in the best position to give them something close to a motherly love and care, but it is sad you feel the way you feel, especially with your brother not helping matters...
My advice to you would be not to be too desperate about the situation, or else it'll choke and suffocate you.
Calm down and be at ease dear. Breathe.
Have patience. Nwe ndidi, and you'll see that the situation is probably not as bad as see it...
Those babies need you....if only your brother had the wisdom on how to go about the situation
Consider reconsidering your decision for those little babies' sake.... biko nne ehn...jikota umuaka ndi ahu it's a sacrifice.

I do take good care of them because they are not my problem but their father is my problem here but I can’t keep taking care of them when I my own needs are not fulfilled yet. If he will allow them to stay with us in d village that will be good and I will continue to take care of them in d village if not he have to hire a nanny for them

Hmmm,you're just wasting your life and time wait for nobody.please if you get to villa on DEC stay back so that u can't build ur life,if he don't want his children to stay in d villa he should employ a nanny or marry another woman or your mum should go and stay with them,my dear you're just wasting ooo bcs your career is going backward (you will even soon forget the skill self) you don't have money either or maintaining you to get your own spouse,at the end him and his children if you're become a nonentity they want to make you will even mock you that you're old cargoes aunty with nothing so be careful and insist on what you want.[color=#990000][/color]

H0711:
What do you want me to talk to her about ?

As she d asleep wit ur brother,she can talk to him on ur behalf,,u nid clothes,cream,pad, pocket money and so on..

Some men na ttoto dey reset there brain..or u just go back to ur mom
I maybe wrong or right

If you also die? Won't he find and pay for another nanny? Someone he won't dare owe?
Won't your mother and your brother find their way?
Don't be the one that saves others when you have nobody to run to save yourself.

stacyadams:
As she d asleep wit ur brother,she can talk to him on ur behalf,,u nid clothes,cream,pad, pocket money and so on..

Some men na ttoto dey reset there brain..or u just go back to ur mom
I maybe wrong or right

Babe!

Op don't kill your self because of something that isn't worth it o!


Stay alive and try to fix things. it won't be easy but in the end, the outcome will be what you want.


Think about it!